List everything that's wrong with your neighbours, who otherwise are really quite nice

Downstairs there are some posh grad students (architectuure, philosophy) from deep rural origins who are cute and trendy. We're on the first floor. Second floor, a very petite gay intellectual property lawyer who is lovely: he came downstairs to apologise for 'a domestic' one day and we'd heard nothing; all we ever hear of him is his wash machine spinning and perhaps the riff of credits for Buffy DVDs. Third floor neighbours: total white-collar louts, clichés brought to life. Tony comes home from his job as a junior accountant and is straight into his England shirt and in the pub five minutes after work (schedule interrupted to attend Euro 2004). His girlfriend is an Antipodean secretary who buys shite clothes from catalogues. Her name is Vic but I feel like re-christening her Hiya, as is all she ever says. Top floor is a web designer, his partner and their son Zach, who's four. They're the ones we sometimes hang out with.

When I talked to Sue about them, and I expressed mt concern over their shouting at each other Sue laughed and said "oh no, they're not shouting at each other, oh my no. They bet on the horse races, you see, and the dog races. They're shouting at the telly!" and she laughed and laughed. "Annoying isn't it?"

My street is slightly downhill, and on the very first day I moved in, my neighbor from across the street came by to tell me not to park in front of my own house on the street. The reason being that my next-door neighbor would get his yard flooded. Supposedly, the water from the rain would come down the street in the gutter, hit my truck tire if it was parked on the street, and be directed into my neighbor's yard. Remember that I said "slightly" downhill.

One time, a friend of mine came over, parked her car on the street since my truck was in my driveway, and the two of us went into town for the evening. When we got back, it was raining and damned if that across the street neighbor wasn't sitting on his porch at two in the morning yelling about her car being in the street.

I had some friends stay with me once. They parked their car on the street on a clear night, and damned if the neighbor's wife didn't come banging on the door at seven in the morning wanting the car moved from the public street.

The reason for all of the italicizing is because the guy who actually lives in the house next door has never said one word to me. He's an able person, tall and in his early forties. There's something very, very weird about the fact that he has nothing to say to me, but our across-the-street neighbors are the ones having heart attacks about his yard. That bothers me more than anything else that I've mentioned.

I park in the driveway all the time anyway, since it's easier for me. However, suffice to say, when the fianceé finally gets here in a few months, she's going to park wherever she damn-well pleases.

Neighbors to the right - also totally cool, but way more problematic. The woman has two kids and the man has two kids, but they're not married. The kids don't get along and fight all the time. The wife, Samantha, has befriended / made a mentor of my Jessica, and occasioanlly calls her over to smoke pot. Jessica is about 15 years Samantha's junior, but Jessica feels bad because Samanatha has no other friends and is routinely verbally abused by her boyfriend, Karl.

Karl is crazy. We hang out and drink and barbeque outside all the time, we spent the recent blackout togther (it was fun). But he's abolsutely insane. He'll yell from the street "HELLO IN THERE!!!" to us when our windows are closed. Sometimes we have to just ignore him. He made a chunk of money from an injury he sustained, and when he got the check, he disappeared for a week. Samantha freuqnetly came knocking at our door crying, but it turns out the dude spent $9,000 on strip clubs and, presumably, whores. He showed up eight days later as if nothing had happened.

There's more but I'm saving it for my book.

I'll try to pay more attention to your peephole, Scott. Sorry I've been slacking off.

When his spurned lover hit his jeep for the second time, he reefed open the door and dived in. We thought he was hitting her but he was just trying to get the keys out of the ignition and SHE was hitting HIM. Then she jumped out and started calling him a bastard, and why did he do this to her, blah blah. His wife came out and was in a mess. The cops arrived fairly quickly and took control of the sitch. Sometime during the night, a tow truck came and took his totalled jeep and the lover's smashed up car away and all that was left next morning was some broken glass and muffled yells from next door's direction.

Nasty stuff.

No, they're not. They're just convinced that the water will be blocked from the gutter by the tire and will go into the guy's ... yard.

I supposed that if a Tsunami hit North Little Rock, Arkansas, there could be a drainage problem, but at that point I'd be more worried about other things.

This will save your SO from having to shout at them - or worse.

Sometimes hear disruptive sounds and I look out through the spyhole, only to see nothing at all. Which is odd, coz my next door neighbour can't handle his bouze and sometimes comes back late at nite and his gf won't let him in when he's drunk, so he smashes the glass in the door. Nice.

The neighbours on the other side are so quiet I don't notice them at all.

The people who used to live downstairs would spend hours cheering, almost every day. We could hear everything, because this building is made of paper, and sound really travels. Once I asked them to turn down their music a little bit because we couldn't hear our telly [this is true], and she said 'but we can hear you walk.' I apologised and asked her when we walk, so we'd know to be more careful around those times. She said '11 o'clock.' Further prodding revealed this to be 11am.

I don't think they liked us after that, because in the weeks before they moved out, they'd come home at 3am, whack the music up full bore, and do their hollering thing again. Or perhaps they were just dumb and forgot we could hear everything.

I went out there awhile ago, and holy shit is my driveway and house out in the open now. Say what you will about that diseased tree, but at least it provided some cover. I think that I can see the bank from here now and more than likely, they can see me, too.

I can also see my neighbors' property now much better. I think the guy can safely put his trimmer toy down now.

A man who survived the horrors of the Auschwitz concentration camp ended up living next door to a former Nazi camp guard in Arizona, US, it has emerged.

A RON PAUL STICKER HAS MATERIALIZED on upstairs neighbor's car. He also has d-bag friends/bandmates and baby mama drama that has woken us at strange hours but...ron paul?

Give it time, he'll have ol' Ron over one night for drinks.

Nothing! They brought us a coffee table, a stack of 78s and some High Lives, and smoked with us, and watched football.

They are literally crackheads.

Had a really loud fight today, gave me a dirty look when I passed out in the backyard that one time.

What? I was in a chair.

Our neighbour roasts coffee in their garage, and because the houses are semi-detached the smell of coffee is all over our house. Trouble is that he roasts the beans at too high a temperature so basically it smells like burning crap. Also his son has a collection of semi-working cars which are parked all over the street.
Not exactly a neighbour, but someone in the neighbourhood has bonfires every two or three days which from the smell of the smoke seem to consist mainly of tyres!

my neighbour is a lovely, typically old-glasgow woman in her 70s. she's very lonely because both her mother and her husband died in the last few years and she doesn't have any children or close family. i live in the house her mother lived in until she died; mother and daughter 70-odd and 90-odd living across the landing from one another. she's really great but very nosey and she seems to listen out for me because almost every time i leave or come back to the flat she comes out to speak to me for at least 10 minutes. sometimes she gives me things - cakes or even a can of beer - and talks to me for a long time. i've tried to not accept these small gifts but it's easier to just take them. as i said, she is a great old bird but i would like to leave my flat without having to talk to her every time i do so. i've taken, on occasion, to telling her i really need the loo (on way in) or (on way out) that i'm in a hurry and i urgently have to meet someone, often true because i'm usually running late for one thing or another, but she looks hurt when i tell her this and i don't want to hurt her feelings because i really like her. i've no idea how to deal with it.

Are there any seniors' activities that she might like that you could casually mention or ask if she was partial to? She's probably lonely, and really if a person's health is good, 70s isn't so old.

oh no, she's a live-wire too. very active and she does do a fair number of activities but regardless of how many things she's involved in she's still at home the bulk of the time. i don't want to make it sound like a drag because she's really funny - she has a very dry sense of humour. i just need to get in and out of the house without speaking to her all the time.

cougars

All my apartment neighbors are grad students from China, Korea, and India who won't even make eye contact with me, much less socialize. I'm okay with that because I'm pretty much the same way.

I have new neighbours as of this week. I have said hello to them, which is an improvement on the last bunch. They are two 20-something males, which makes me uneasy, but we'll see. They haven't fucked up so far.

i was woken up at 8am today by a spectacularly monged guy trying to get into my flat. christ knows what he'd been doing all night but it seemed to have melted his brain. i gently steered him towards the (open) door of my neighbour's flat -- at which point my (half-naked but not-at-all-monged) neighbour appeared apologising profusely. this kind of thing is not uncommon. sometimes it can be a little annoying.

i went back to bed for an hour or so.

i was woken up at 4:30am by the sound of my downstairs neighbour slamming things and yelling "get the fuck out". i assume this was one of his unwelcome crackhead compadres causing all the fuss (he's allegedly trying to quit the stuff).

Woken at 7 yesterday by Buster coming back from his Big Saturday Night Out to find his mum had locked him out, or he had lost his keys, or something. Cue half an hour of banging on the door and shouting, trying to rouse her.

Someone else in the street asked him, moderately politely, to shut the fuck up. When it looked a fight was going to break out, we heard Mandy crash down the stairs and stagger up the hall to let him in. Quite how the addition of another, quite quiet, voice was enough to make the difference and wake her I don't know.

Has anyone tried to get involved in like local resident groups or whatever to deal with the general low level shit of life, eg the council failing to do most things, other local issues?

I've been involved in the odd thing in a sporadic way and I know the chairperson a little bit, and she seems really nice and p organised. I didn't really want to join or take on a specific role but said I'd help with stuff where I could.

But so far I am just astonished by how bad some people are when it comes to trying to organise a group meeting. I guess any kind of casual organisation is like this.

So far, one person, has insisted on Sunday mornings as the only time they can do, which is basically a dealbreaker for me as I consider this stuff work/stress and therefore a weekday thing, and probably for others since everyone stopped replying after this. The chair seems to have sort of acquiesced to this in that way that happens when someone says what they can do without offering any 'but what suits other people'.

Now today the same person says, after about two weeks of a fixed date: 'oh btw I can't do the Sunday you've picked, can we do the Saturday?'

Maybe my will power is low but I basically just think it's not even worth getting involved if I have to witness this kind of thing.

The erosion of the virtue of being a 'person of your word' and the emergence of fuckin everyone in London as a committed flake is something I feel has absolutely happened

"Now today the same person says, after about two weeks of a fixed date: 'oh btw I can't do the Sunday you've picked, can we do the Saturday?'"

Just say no we are going ahead. Please see the minutes and make sure you can attend the next meeting?

The thing is I am not even going because this person insisted, basically unsupported, that we must do a weekend. I find it amusing/confounding that even after that they still manage to torpedo it further by changing the day. I am not the chair but I feel they should just do a Doodle and go with that. Or push back when someone obliviously dominates it all.

Like the idea of meeting to sort local issues at 10am on a Sunday morning is obviously fucking insane and the group has been tumbleweed since this was forced to be the time.

On Sunday night around 11pm we heard this gentle tapping at the front door, my wife freaked out immediately, I said "who's there?" but no response, tried to find another widow where we could see who it was but no good vantage point. I was going to open the door but my wife asked me not to, so I just said "who's there?" again. In reply the mystery man said "I know you're there" which did not make us calm down at all. I repeated one more time "who's there?" and this time he said "it's your neighbour, you've left your car door open" - and it was him, and the door was open. But who does such a timid knock and then just stands there saying nothing? nb. we do also have a doorbell.

that was a pretty suspenseful story

i liked the twist where it turned out CAAL is a ghost

Weird to be like I know you're in there, as if he's threatening a favour.

yeah it is very odd behaviour, it's funny because he's the one person not on the neighbourhood whatsapp and the guy who shares the other half of his semi-detached absolutely despises him, apparently for having a ring camera? That guy's a prick anyway. Neighbour also has a huge bengal cat and the whatsapp group constantly complains about it being aggro to other cats. But guy himself seems fine, cat does not mess with our dog so no problems there either.

anyway today he had a massive TV delivered and was out so now the boxes are sitting in my hallway. i'm going to go next door and do the tiniest knock on his door and say "i know you're there"

"Why are you doing this? I have something that belongs to you. Don't you want to know what it is?"

yeah i whispered it through his letterbox in a gollum voice (actually he is still out and I did no such thing ftr)

might as well use this thread to express disapproval towards the cop that lives in my building who rotates illegally parking his various large automobiles in the office lot next door.