I HAVE BEEN FEELING CRAPPY BECAUSE OF CONSTIPATION AND CANNOT MAKE THE POO

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and also there's this girl at school...

― logged out for my protection, Friday, 29 October 2004 05:17 (twenty-one years ago)

Can she dislodge it?

― Core of Sphagnum (Autumn Almanac), Friday, 29 October 2004 05:19 (twenty-one years ago)

Ask her for a lend of her Stanley knife.

― Core of Sphagnum (Autumn Almanac), Friday, 29 October 2004 05:20 (twenty-one years ago)

eat some vegetables.

― Ian John50n (orion), Friday, 29 October 2004 05:20 (twenty-one years ago)

prunes are the ticket

― gem (trisk), Friday, 29 October 2004 05:21 (twenty-one years ago)

work it out with a pencil

― the surface noise (slight return) (electricsound), Friday, 29 October 2004 05:23 (twenty-one years ago)

AAARGH

― logged out for my protection, Friday, 29 October 2004 05:24 (twenty-one years ago)

there that takes care of one problem

― logged out for my protection, Friday, 29 October 2004 05:24 (twenty-one years ago)

work it out with an hpencil

― JaXoN (JasonD), Friday, 29 October 2004 05:29 (twenty-one years ago)

"crappy"

― JaXoN (JasonD), Friday, 29 October 2004 05:29 (twenty-one years ago)

This thread has given me a good run for my money.

― Core of Sphagnum (Autumn Almanac), Friday, 29 October 2004 05:30 (twenty-one years ago)

kashi.

― todd swiss (eliti), Friday, 29 October 2004 05:42 (twenty-one years ago)

Take Ex-Lax

― Rumpy Pumpkin (rumpypumpkin), Friday, 29 October 2004 06:06 (twenty-one years ago)

we're friends but she likes someone else i think and it's all very high school.

i'm still backed up.

― logged out for my protection, Friday, 29 October 2004 13:41 (twenty-one years ago)

If it's really serious, like enema time, go to the drug store and buy mineral oil. Drink about a cup of it. Seriously.

― Orbit (Orbit), Friday, 29 October 2004 13:42 (twenty-one years ago)

Eat a mouldy kebab, then watch out, she's gonna blow.

― Penelope_111 (Penelope_111), Friday, 29 October 2004 13:44 (twenty-one years ago)

this thread has hit rock bottom har har

― You've Got to Pick Up Every Stitch (tracerhand), Friday, 29 October 2004 13:44 (twenty-one years ago)

get a vacuum and suck it out. dont let the shit win.

― splooge (thesplooge), Friday, 29 October 2004 13:45 (twenty-one years ago)

who posts this rubbish

― Ronan (Ronan), Friday, 29 October 2004 13:47 (twenty-one years ago)

rhetorical ruddiger

― Freelance Hiveminder (blueski), Friday, 29 October 2004 13:49 (twenty-one years ago)

A promise I make to you: toot a monstrous rail and watch the poopy fly.

― sea shanties and wet panties, Friday, 29 October 2004 13:50 (twenty-one years ago)

http://www.nlm.nih.gov/medlineplus/ency/images/ency/fullsize/9098.jpg

― Loose Translation: Sexy Dancer (sexyDancer), Friday, 29 October 2004 13:52 (twenty-one years ago)

So Adam in SF's job is rectal cleaning?

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Friday, 29 October 2004 13:54 (twenty-one years ago)

xpost if it's good enough for beckett...

― logged out for my protection, Friday, 29 October 2004 13:55 (twenty-one years ago)

http://www.hepafilters.com/flanders/misc/latexglv.jpg

― :|, Friday, 29 October 2004 13:55 (twenty-one years ago)

COFFEE COFFEE COFFEE

― David R. (popshots75`), Friday, 29 October 2004 13:55 (twenty-one years ago)

http://www.lady-bird.org/health/image/enema.jpg

― :|, Friday, 29 October 2004 13:57 (twenty-one years ago)

is that woman observing what I think she's observing?

― Jarlr'mai (jarlrmai), Friday, 29 October 2004 14:01 (twenty-one years ago)

this thread has hit rock bottom har har

no shit

― ken c (ken c), Friday, 29 October 2004 14:03 (twenty-one years ago)

the....puns....*gasp*.....the terrible puns...

― Jarlr'mai (jarlrmai), Friday, 29 October 2004 14:07 (twenty-one years ago)

it's puns like these that give constipation a bad name

― ken c (ken c), Friday, 29 October 2004 14:16 (twenty-one years ago)

I can't quite put my finger on the problem...

― the apex of nadirs (Rock Hardy), Friday, 29 October 2004 14:36 (twenty-one years ago)

just let it out.

― splooge (thesplooge), Friday, 29 October 2004 17:07 (twenty-one years ago)

stop holding it in, apex.

― splooge (thesplooge), Friday, 29 October 2004 17:07 (twenty-one years ago)

pepperming tea cures everything.

― Dan Selzer (Dan Selzer), Friday, 29 October 2004 17:20 (twenty-one years ago)

What the hell? That was like Silence of the Lambs enema up there: "It puts the barium in the rectum..."

― nabisco (nabisco), Friday, 29 October 2004 17:22 (twenty-one years ago)

barium in the rectum

It may not be the sun shining out of your ass, but it is glowing!

― Michael White (Hereward), Friday, 29 October 2004 17:25 (twenty-one years ago)

i'm going to ask her out tonight

― logged out for my protection, Saturday, 30 October 2004 14:30 (twenty-one years ago)

use your mouth.

― cºzen (Cozen), Saturday, 30 October 2004 14:39 (twenty-one years ago)

this thread has hit rock bottom har har
no shit

-- ken c (pykachu10...), October 29th, 2004.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

the....puns....*gasp*.....the terrible puns...
-- Jarlr'mai (jimmy.parke...), October 29th, 2004.

I believe this thread has settled the question of whether or not there is intelligent life on Uranus.

― latebloomer (latebloomer), Saturday, 30 October 2004 14:48 (twenty-one years ago)

It's very difficult to find... all the intelligent life is under the surface of Uranus...it HIDES.

Logged Out, you may need to get a sample to JPL or the SETI people or something...they'll help you out.

― the apex of nadirs (Rock Hardy), Saturday, 30 October 2004 16:42 (twenty-one years ago)

this was taken from glastonbury, hope this helps you

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v323/kenjuggle/DCP_2413s.jpg

― ken c (ken c), Monday, 1 November 2004 01:31 (twenty-one years ago)

arghhhh

― LE CHUCK!™ (ex machina), Monday, 1 November 2004 01:34 (twenty-one years ago)

What is with all the shite tales lately?

― Penelope_111 (Penelope_111), Monday, 1 November 2004 01:55 (twenty-one years ago)

five months pass...

It's been one week now.

― Rumpie, Friday, 22 April 2005 06:30 (twenty-one years ago)

I've got a headache. I haven't taken laxatives because I'm on the early shift this week. Too scared in case I'm late for work in the morning cause I'm shitting. Now it's got to this stage. I better take laxatives tonight.

― Rumpie, Friday, 22 April 2005 06:32 (twenty-one years ago)

i shit twice today you fucker.

― her , you fucker, Friday, 22 April 2005 06:50 (twenty-one years ago)

i feel fabulous.

i could go meet the grandma of whoever and be seen as sincere.

put thru the test mill.

you fucks.

none of you know me.

i'm a well.

i obviously using the basest form of poetry and comedy, puns.

so the fuck what.

so do you think this is a purging.

i'll fucking put a paste on those who look at me with condemnation.

go ahead, shun me.

shun me to my face.

do that and you'll feel a fraction of the pain.

more. whatev. you might not feel anything.

― her , you fucker, Friday, 22 April 2005 06:53 (twenty-one years ago)

are you fucking serious?

― [email protected], Friday, 22 April 2005 12:57 (twenty-one years ago)

fourteen years pass...

i feel fabulous.

i could go meet the grandma of whoever and be seen as sincere.

put thru the test mill.

you fucks.

none of you know me.

i'm a well.

i obviously using the basest form of poetry and comedy, puns.

so the fuck what.

so do you think this is a purging.

i'll fucking put a paste on those who look at me with condemnation.

go ahead, shun me.

shun me to my face.

do that and you'll feel a fraction of the pain.

more. whatev. you might not feel anything.

― her , you fucker, Friday, April 22, 2005 2:53 AM bookmarkflaglink

― ... that's Traore! (Neanderthal), Wednesday, 5 February 2020 03:59 (six years ago)

oh, that little thing? twarn't nuthin'

― A is for (Aimless), Wednesday, 5 February 2020 04:03 (six years ago)

great revive

― an incoherent crustacean (MatthewK), Wednesday, 5 February 2020 12:48 (six years ago)

ffs

― GK Chessington's World of Adventure (Noodle Vague), Wednesday, 5 February 2020 12:51 (six years ago)

This thread was the inspiration for my Shower Song of the morning (number 27,142 in a series). Imagine the powerful pipes of a David Coverdale intoning

I was staaaanding on the edge of a poo poo
I was strooolling down the ledge towards a boom boom
But it ran into the night
And it rolled right out of sight
And now I just don't know what to doo doooooooooooo

― Dr. Teeth and the Women (Old Lunch), Wednesday, 5 February 2020 12:52 (six years ago)

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