It's the dress I wore to the British Pavilion party at the Venice Biennale this summer with absolutely nothing underneath but a pair of fishnet stockings, stilettos, and the very last drops from my b

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So add a sentence that furthers this narrative along .
Remember this is Nitsuhs idea, flame him .

― anthony, Wednesday, 21 November 2001 01:00 (twenty-four years ago)

Of course, you wouldn't recognize it now, it's in tatters. Darling, you wouldn't believe how it got that way.

― Sean, Wednesday, 21 November 2001 01:00 (twenty-four years ago)

The tussles that got it this way are *nothing* compared to the copywright issues yet to come, Miss Thing.

― suzy, Wednesday, 21 November 2001 01:00 (twenty-four years ago)

It all started when I caught sight of a heart- stoppingly familiar tiny childlike figure in a red duffelcoat, vanishing out of sight down a dingy alley.

― mark s, Wednesday, 21 November 2001 01:00 (twenty-four years ago)

*chortle*

But my husband was stuck in the wrong film. He wouldn't go to sleep in case sis body was snatched while he slumbered.

― suzy, Wednesday, 21 November 2001 01:00 (twenty-four years ago)

Alas he dozed, and Sis Body checked out of her own accord, pausing only to help herself to his wallet — and one stripey sock.

― mark s, Wednesday, 21 November 2001 01:00 (twenty-four years ago)

Sweaty gondoliers prowled laciviously about.

(Don't forget how this is supposed to end: filthily. Suzy, Anthony and I will doubtless enjoy it far more that way.)

― Nitsuh, Wednesday, 21 November 2001 01:00 (twenty-four years ago)

Twisted evil sex monkeys, the lot of you! Go forth and sin some more.

― Ned Raggett, Wednesday, 21 November 2001 01:00 (twenty-four years ago)

Fondling monkeys withthe stripey sock in a preformance art orgy in Saint Marks Square.

― anthony, Wednesday, 21 November 2001 01:00 (twenty-four years ago)

If only Damon and his kinky sex acts would show up and disect them, throw them in fermldahyde I could once again be the 6th Spice Grrrl.

― Mr Noodles, Wednesday, 21 November 2001 01:00 (twenty-four years ago)

This has gone so horribly wrong as to be a candidate for the year's worst thread.

― Nitsuh, Wednesday, 21 November 2001 01:00 (twenty-four years ago)

And intentionally so. I can't write porn on purpose.

― suzy, Wednesday, 21 November 2001 01:00 (twenty-four years ago)

I suppose it just flows forth naturally, eh?

May this thread live on as undying proof of what happens when you try to make a flirty comment and it all goes horribly awry. Still, though, I'm convinced that that sentence sounds like the beginning of a Penthouse letter, only gender-bent.

― Nitsuh, Thursday, 22 November 2001 01:00 (twenty-four years ago)

i was wondering where my goddam stripey sock had gone!

― katie, Thursday, 22 November 2001 01:00 (twenty-four years ago)

MORLEYS of BRIXTON in the past have sold me *one* fishnet stocking so the monkey can have that instead. THe monkey can go nowhere near any of my stripey soXoR, thank you very mach.

― Sarah, Thursday, 22 November 2001 01:00 (twenty-four years ago)

Hey, it was boiling in Venice in June and it was a floor length dress so it was more about what would be comfortable vs. what would be 'naughty'. I don't really have the knack for porn because I don't take it very seriously and I just laugh at it whenever I am presented with it. But weirdly, the proto-crack whore at my school ran away to notoriety as a Penthouse centrefold; this was the girl who'd always be the one with head lice when we were all little.

The funniest porn I ever saw was around an ex-boyfriend's house when we were still going out. He had a Westminster Cable pr0n channel and the film appeared to be art-directed by the Logan's Run team, with lots of pink and purple shag carpeting. There were dick-shaped plinths made out of the carpeting (purple base, pink shaft, purple top) and rather a lot of hair farmers at play.

― suzy, Thursday, 22 November 2001 01:00 (twenty-four years ago)

Regardless of how naughty the dress was or wasn't, the way you expressed it has the ILE dirty mac brigade in wank material for the next 12 monhts. And you have to live with that...

― Mark C, Thursday, 22 November 2001 01:00 (twenty-four years ago)

Well, as y'all know I prefer GASTROPORN.

― suzy, Thursday, 22 November 2001 01:00 (twenty-four years ago)

Well i consider myself part of the 1l* dirty mac brigade and what made me hard was to the British Pavilion party at the Venice Biennale this summer bit. Art Wankery and Gastroporn. Suzy if you grow a penis i will coddle it.

― anthony, Thursday, 22 November 2001 01:00 (twenty-four years ago)

coddled, mollycoddled, who was molly and did she have apenis...i wan a cracker.

― geoff, Thursday, 22 November 2001 01:00 (twenty-four years ago)

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