Re-tell minor events of your life as if it were a porn movie

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I sat there in English class yesterday and my english teacher said my Tattoo was cool.

thanks baby

no problem hari, would you like a blowjob?

but but your my english teacher

let me see your wuthering height

― Hari A$hur$t (Toaster), Friday, 28 January 2005 03:53 (twenty-one years ago)

also when you go to the bank you could have AURAL sex and leave a DEPOSIT.

if you get my meaning

and i think you do.

― Hari A$hur$t (Toaster), Friday, 28 January 2005 03:59 (twenty-one years ago)

T'other night, I went on the interweb, and, goaded by a bunch of strangers, did a golden shower on myself!! Oh God I came like the 6:28 from Paddington.

― Frogman Henry, Friday, 28 January 2005 04:06 (twenty-one years ago)

early?

― roxymuzak (roxymuzak), Friday, 28 January 2005 04:08 (twenty-one years ago)

Hari's tattoo.

― Mr Noodles (Mr Noodles), Friday, 28 January 2005 04:10 (twenty-one years ago)

i got up in the middle of the night for a glass of water. to my surprise there was a large breasted woman in my kitchen. she said can i have some. i said wot? she said some of that. she gasped as i handed her the long firm glass. her candy pink lips bent toward the rim. its too much she gasped. i said here let me help you and i took a mouthful. she leant back against the kitchen counter. her brassiere had disappeared somehow. i heard music. drinking the water seemed to take for ever. i drank a bit standing up then a bit more on my back. finally i stood up again and somehow managed to spill the water all over her face.

― thagregman, Friday, 28 January 2005 04:11 (twenty-one years ago)

This retarded idea for a thread is just an excuse to draw more attention to you new tattoo, isn't it.

― Sasha (sgh), Friday, 28 January 2005 05:41 (twenty-one years ago)

If i wanted to draw more attention to my tattoo i would start a thread called "LOOK AT MY TATTOO" and post, like, a bazillion fucking pictures from each angle known to mankind and then i'd go to an airbase and steal a fucking jet and just fly it up into the air thinking "i'm the king of the world" and nothing would matter anymore except my tattoo and everybody below would know about it and then i could start more threads about it.

Does it look like i did that? Does it? No, it doesn't.

― Hari A$hur$t (Toaster), Friday, 28 January 2005 12:14 (twenty-one years ago)

Sasha meant to put a full stop between 'you' and 'new'

― Stevem On X (blueski), Friday, 28 January 2005 12:15 (twenty-one years ago)

Oh.

In which case:

"Yes, it is new. Thanks!"

― Hari A$hur$t (Toaster), Friday, 28 January 2005 12:16 (twenty-one years ago)

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