woud you rather be tsar of russia or jp morgan?

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tsar from 1870-on, you have to be one of the tsars. i know i know nicholas ii got shot to death. big deal he was still a freaking tsar. jp morgan sr was fat had that weird nose. i think jr mightve too but no one really cares much about him, he was more a name than a person. oh money money, the frankensteinian monster of creation! i weep for our humanity. people are more than the sum total, of their material wealth. but not poor jp morgan jr.

― historian., Thursday, 31 March 2005 19:14 (twenty-one years ago)

i want to put out a russian top 40 mash-up called "tsars on 45."

― jody von oy (Jody Beth Rosen), Thursday, 31 March 2005 19:18 (twenty-one years ago)

I would be a Czar. I want palaces and peacocks, not railroads and bonds.

― andy --, Thursday, 31 March 2005 19:19 (twenty-one years ago)

j.p. morgan, better interest, no serfs

― hstencil (hstencil), Thursday, 31 March 2005 19:21 (twenty-one years ago)

JP Morgan. Got to sit next to Jamie Farr and Artie Johnson.

― dave225 (Dave225), Thursday, 31 March 2005 19:24 (twenty-one years ago)

Tsar of Russia-you could get great musicians to perform for you, and have fancy-schmancy eggs made out of jewels, and have huge country estates surrounded by wolves and crazed monks. Unless you're Alexander II, then you'd just be blown up by anarchists.

― jocelyn (Jocelyn), Thursday, 31 March 2005 19:28 (twenty-one years ago)

I'd be Alexander III, only nice.

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Thursday, 31 March 2005 19:31 (twenty-one years ago)

ok but really like jp morgan couldnt get that too if he wanted?? no he wouldnt have had the same russian mystique but he couldve had the freshly tamed west to play with.

both had huge yachts but the tsar did have the biggest in the world. otoh morgan COULDVE if he wanted.

morgan surely got more pussy.that might be the result of a character flaw in teh tsars however.

morgan wouldve had freedom of travel like the tsar couldnt imagine.

lots of angles to cover here, think hard ppl.

― necromancer, Thursday, 31 March 2005 19:33 (twenty-one years ago)

Being Czar would have been a very fancy but rather boring job which, if taken seriously, would require immense amounts of work and great political finesse. Being a capitalist is hard, but it ain't that hard and it's much easier to retire than to abdicate.

The freedom of travel part would clinch it for me.

― M. White (Miguelito), Thursday, 31 March 2005 19:43 (twenty-one years ago)

Also, my Russian is ~~rusty~~ mostly non-existant.

― M. White (Miguelito), Thursday, 31 March 2005 19:44 (twenty-one years ago)

Tsars are sooo much sexier. And have you seen their palaces? Oh. Their palaces. So hot.

― Maria (Maria), Thursday, 31 March 2005 19:50 (twenty-one years ago)

ihttp://www-personal.umich.edu/~jigoulov/Mushroomlore/bilibin1.jpg

Look at this freaky Bilibin piece... it looks like tsarist Pushead!

― andy --, Thursday, 31 March 2005 20:12 (twenty-one years ago)

I'd be Alexander III, only nice.

I'm sorry, Ned - you're going to have to choose. One or the other.

― Girolamo Savonarola, Thursday, 31 March 2005 20:55 (twenty-one years ago)

My Name is Morgan (But It Ain't J.P.)

A man named William Morgan took his girl to see a play,
And on the journey homeward, they stopped into a cafe.
As soon as they got seated, Liza grabbed the bill of fare,
She called the waiter and she ordered everything was there.
Bill says, "I know you're hungry, girl, and I don't like to squeal,
But who do you suppose is going to pay for such a meal?
You may have known me pretty long, but you sure have got my initials wrong;
My name is Morgan, but it ain't J. P."

cho: My name is Morgan, but it ain't J. P.
There is no bank on Wall Street that belongs to me.
You may have known me pretty long,
But you sure have got my initials wrong;
My name is Morgan, but it ain't J. P."

Bill Morgan married Liza, thinking he could change her ways,
But what she did to William, first, I'm most ashamed to say.
Whenever she'd go shopping, she'd buy everything she'd see,
And what she couldn't pay for, had it sent home COD.

cho: My name is Morgan, but it ain't J. P.
There is no Texas oil well that belongs to me.
You may have known me pretty long,
But you sure have got my initials wrong;
My name is Morgan, but it ain't J. P."

One day six big delivery wagons back up to Bill's door,
They asked him to accept the goods while they went back for more;
It didn't take Bill very long to grab his hat and coat,
When Liza she returned again, she found this little note:

cho: My name is Morgan, but it ain't J. P.
You must think I own a railroad company.
You may have known me pretty long,
But you sure have got my initials wrong;
My name is Morgan, but it ain't J. P."

― Amateur(ist) (Amateur(ist)), Friday, 1 April 2005 01:19 (twenty-one years ago)

that's Jaye P. Morgan, dave (and you stole my answer!)

― tokyo rosemary (rosemary), Friday, 1 April 2005 02:29 (twenty-one years ago)

I would be J.P Morgan on account of the Hemaphilia in the Tsar's family. Plus the inequities of capitalism are (with the media's help) easier to maintain. Also the Tsar's were pretty crap at leading Russia, none of them even spoke the language.

― lukey (Lukey G), Friday, 1 April 2005 09:01 (twenty-one years ago)

LINK ME MORE BILIBIN!!

― mark s (mark s), Friday, 1 April 2005 09:12 (twenty-one years ago)

Although, as a monarchist, I would really like to be Tzar... (Katharine The Greater would be a fantastic title)

If I were JP Morgan, I would be my brother's boss, and I could make his life hell when he annoys me. Mwah hah hah hah.

― Masonic Cathedral (kate), Friday, 1 April 2005 09:18 (twenty-one years ago)

This is like asking how much blood would I like on my hands.

― Aimless (Aimless), Friday, 1 April 2005 15:43 (twenty-one years ago)

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