God hates AT&T!!! MCI supports Chi1d P0rn!!!!

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http://www.eugenemirman.com/Phone_Company.mp3
http://www.eugenemirman.com/Anti_Gay_Phone_Company_II.mp3

I am, like, totally switching.

giboyeux (skowly), Tuesday, 10 May 2005 16:00 (twenty-one years ago)

Verizon encourages their employees to tolerate the gay lifestyle? WTF?!?!?!?!1111111111

giboyeux (skowly), Tuesday, 10 May 2005 16:03 (twenty-one years ago)

d00dz. This is SERIOUS.

giboyeux (skowly), Tuesday, 10 May 2005 16:09 (twenty-one years ago)

"Basically, God hates GayT&T, MCI and Verizon."
"... Yes."

Good to know.

adam (adam), Tuesday, 10 May 2005 16:51 (twenty-one years ago)

What is the gist of these mp3s? I don't get the feeling it is too safe to listen to at work.

Alex in SF (Alex in SF), Tuesday, 10 May 2005 16:53 (twenty-one years ago)

EVERYONE hates AT&T, MCI and Verizon! Why should God be any different?

The Ghost of Dan Perry (Dan Perry), Tuesday, 10 May 2005 16:53 (twenty-one years ago)

Gist: Christian phone company is trying lure customers by telling them that Att et al are, like, totally HOMO. the mp3s are recordings of a sales pitch.

giboyeux (skowly), Tuesday, 10 May 2005 17:03 (twenty-one years ago)

"Christian phone company"??????????

GIGGLETITS

The Ghost of Dan Perry (Dan Perry), Tuesday, 10 May 2005 17:04 (twenty-one years ago)

*shakes head* wtf is wrong with people.

Alex in SF (Alex in SF), Tuesday, 10 May 2005 17:05 (twenty-one years ago)

http://www.wonkette.com/politics/culture-war/index.php#reach-out-and-touch-someone-but-not-in-a-gay-way-102916

United American Technologies: No. No, that's MCI.

Mr. Mirman: MCI has hardcore child pornography?

United American Technologies: Yes, they are. They have a pedophile Web site for men who love boys. It's a Montréal based Web site....

Mr. Mirman: And so MCI basically has a child pornography ring?

United American Technologies: That's correct.

Mr. Mirman: What about the others? What does Verizon do?

United American Technologies: Okay. Verizon, what they do is they train their employees to accept the gay and lesbian lifestyle.

kingfish maximum overdrunk (Kingfish), Tuesday, 10 May 2005 17:05 (twenty-one years ago)

Also from Wonkette (which r00lz):

With 2000 customers reportedly switching to United American Technologies each month, Christian-based lying and phone homophobia is a lucrative business.

Ye-he-heh-heyah!!

Only In America.

giboyeux (skowly), Tuesday, 10 May 2005 17:09 (twenty-one years ago)

Eugene Mirman is awesome.

Huk-L, Tuesday, 10 May 2005 17:13 (twenty-one years ago)

http://www.nysun.com/article/13577

here's the first part of the OP-Ed bit at the NY Sun that she links to, tho i can't find a login from bugmenot.com that will work:

Hate Speech On the Other Line

BY JOHN P. AVLON
May 10, 2005

"Faith, Family and Freedom" - I'm in favor of them. And I'd sure be steamed if these American values were hijacked by some special interest in a crass attempt to profit from politics and people's fears. But, lo and behold, little is sacred in an era where the culture wars have graduated from grassroots skirmishes to organized armies. Not even your long-distance calling plan is safe in the ideological crossfire.

For example, a San Francisco-based company called "Working Assets" offers long-distance carrier service that donates a percentage of each customer's bill to groups such as Human Rights Watch, Planned Parenthood, and the ACLU. The company claims to have raised $47 million for these organizations over the past two decades. With so much activist cash available via unorthodox political outreach, it was only a matter of time until conservative organizations used the same strategy. That time has apparently arrived...

kingfish maximum overdrunk (Kingfish), Tuesday, 10 May 2005 17:13 (twenty-one years ago)

LIKE THE FIST OF GOD WE WILL SMACK THEM!

Alex in SF (Alex in SF), Tuesday, 10 May 2005 17:20 (twenty-one years ago)

THIS IS GREAT NEWS!

Alex in SF (Alex in SF), Tuesday, 10 May 2005 17:21 (twenty-one years ago)

DO YOU GUYS PROVIDE DSL?

Alex in SF (Alex in SF), Tuesday, 10 May 2005 17:23 (twenty-one years ago)

Mirman on kids: "People think that kids say the darndest things -- but so would you if you had no education."

Huk-L, Tuesday, 10 May 2005 17:23 (twenty-one years ago)

his website is great, too.

Eugene also plays "Eugene," the Russian foreign exchange student on the Cartoon Network's Home Movies

kingfish maximum overdrunk (Kingfish), Tuesday, 10 May 2005 17:25 (twenty-one years ago)

"...FOOL.
You played yourself."

Ned Raggett (Ned), Tuesday, 10 May 2005 17:28 (twenty-one years ago)

I had his CD, but I haven't been able to find it for a month. It's awesome. I think I might have left it in my dad's car.

Huk-L, Tuesday, 10 May 2005 17:39 (twenty-one years ago)

Are the United Tech support line people saying stuff like "Madam, I'm afraid I won't be able to proceed with processing your issue with our service unless you state that you accept Jesus in your life."?

Matt Besser was a psychic, indeed.

donut debonair (donut), Tuesday, 10 May 2005 18:22 (twenty-one years ago)

hahahahaha i love eugene mirman

joseph (joseph), Tuesday, 10 May 2005 18:36 (twenty-one years ago)

this is the most amazing thing ever. i cant believe you live in a country like this. does america exist, really? im not so sure...

ambrose (ambrose), Tuesday, 10 May 2005 18:55 (twenty-one years ago)

"call your phone company and say, 'i want my jesus telephony!'"

http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/en/0/06/Saddam_Hussein_%281%29.jpg

Eisbär (llamasfur), Tuesday, 10 May 2005 19:36 (twenty-one years ago)

http://www.newshounds.us/2005/05/06/bizarre_sex_habits_of_the_extreme_rightwing.php

A homunculus of Darby Crash, .... created for the purposes of *EVIL* (ex machina, Tuesday, 10 May 2005 19:38 (twenty-one years ago)

"Christian phone company"??????????

GIGGLETITS

Dan, surely you meant GIGGLETITHES?

(wait, this is dan, probably he meant JIZZLETITS)

donut debonair (donut), Tuesday, 10 May 2005 19:46 (twenty-one years ago)

Mirman: "So you want me to switch to a less gay phone company, is that accurate?"

Operator: "No we're not calling you to have you switch to a less gay phone company -- I'm not saying that phone companies are necessarily gay themselves because you can't really personify phone companies in that way."

What a great answer.

Hurting (Hurting), Tuesday, 10 May 2005 20:12 (twenty-one years ago)

JIZZLETITHES!

The Ghost of I Can Die Happy Now (Dan Perry), Tuesday, 10 May 2005 20:13 (twenty-one years ago)

According to UAT's website they NOW provide high speed internet!

Alex in SF (Alex in SF), Tuesday, 10 May 2005 21:38 (twenty-one years ago)

Completely filtered internet mind you, but hey it's quick.

Alex in SF (Alex in SF), Tuesday, 10 May 2005 21:47 (twenty-one years ago)

Yeah, I'd love to see the infighting between who's more hardcore Christian amongst the internet filter supervisors at HQ.

donut debonair (donut), Tuesday, 10 May 2005 21:51 (twenty-one years ago)

"I heard straight from Jesus that surfing www.salon.com is nothing short of heeding one's unmentionables to the Devil himself. The site must be blocked."

donut debonair (donut), Tuesday, 10 May 2005 21:53 (twenty-one years ago)


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