The Simpsons Pledge

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The Arrested Development pledge gave me an idea. I believe a similar pledge regarding the Simpsons may help television as a whole. The pledge is simple: stop watching it.

I, __________ (undersigned ILXor), while having a great respect for the past achievements of The Simpsons, have finally resigned myself to the painful fact that it is only getting worse with every season, and it is time to put it out of its misery. While Matt Groening has Godlike powers over the 7pm Sunday Fox timeslot, he cannot control his show's ratings. The only way to end this torturous grind past mediocrity into the depths of total lameness is to kill The Simpsons' ratings. Simply put, to stop watching it. I, __________ (undersigned ILXor), henceforth refuse to ever again watch The Simpsons at 7pm on Sunday on the Fox channel, and I further resolve to tell my friends to do the same. This is not an act of spite. We simply love the show too much to see it suffer any longer.

Sincerely,

________________
(your signature)

Together we can change the world, people.

― slightly more subdued (kenan), Wednesday, 18 May 2005 16:21 (twenty-one years ago)

but last week's episode was funny.

― Shakey Mo Collier, Wednesday, 18 May 2005 16:23 (twenty-one years ago)

your nuts. I'd never stop watching.

― Miss Misery (thatgirl), Wednesday, 18 May 2005 16:24 (twenty-one years ago)

I shall stop watching the Simpsons at 7:00 on the Fox channel, but continue watching it at 8:00. Eastern Time Zone Rules!!! suckah!

― diedre mousedropping and a quarter (Dave225), Wednesday, 18 May 2005 16:27 (twenty-one years ago)

do a lot of americans pronounce "beloved" with only two syllables?

― RJG (RJG), Wednesday, 18 May 2005 16:27 (twenty-one years ago)

I don't know anyone who does ... and lives to say it again, mmwwahahaha.

― diedre mousedropping and a quarter (Dave225), Wednesday, 18 May 2005 16:29 (twenty-one years ago)

That show used to have it so down, because the funny shit was the little throwaways and the way the characters were animated (like certain ways Mr Burns would walk into a room or Homer reaction shots and that sort of thing), but now the funny shit is supposed to be this sort of "Family Guy"-type bullshit. How soon til they have anal sex gags??

pot, kettle, black, I know.

― Gear! (can Jung shill it, Mu?) (Gear!), Wednesday, 18 May 2005 16:30 (twenty-one years ago)

they say it, all the time, on veronica mars.

― RJG (RJG), Wednesday, 18 May 2005 16:30 (twenty-one years ago)

I'll stop watching when it gets as bad as the last season of Roseanne.

― Martin Skidmore (Martin Skidmore), Wednesday, 18 May 2005 16:30 (twenty-one years ago)

George Lucas vs. Matt Groening in the Battle of Diminishing Returns FITE

― Shakey Mo Collier, Wednesday, 18 May 2005 16:31 (twenty-one years ago)

hahaha i doubt it'll ever come to that martin

― j blount (papa la bas), Wednesday, 18 May 2005 16:31 (twenty-one years ago)

Fluxion, no battle worth fighting was ever easy! Stay the course!

― David R. (popshots75`), Wednesday, 18 May 2005 16:33 (twenty-one years ago)

i've only ever heard 3 syllable 'beloved' but dictionary's showing two pronunciations so i guess some people do pronounce it that way.

― j blount (papa la bas), Wednesday, 18 May 2005 16:34 (twenty-one years ago)

I've heard it both ways.

― jaymc (jaymc), Wednesday, 18 May 2005 16:34 (twenty-one years ago)

And actually I think I hear the three-syllable version most often when people are using the word knowingly, esp. as an exaggeration.

― jaymc (jaymc), Wednesday, 18 May 2005 16:35 (twenty-one years ago)

doesn't GOB say it, with two, in the third clip, on the linked page?

― RJG (RJG), Wednesday, 18 May 2005 16:36 (twenty-one years ago)

oops, no, not GOB--his pal.

― RJG (RJG), Wednesday, 18 May 2005 16:36 (twenty-one years ago)

i'd guess at least 80% of the times i've heard the word in my life it's involved toni morrison.

― j blount (papa la bas), Wednesday, 18 May 2005 16:38 (twenty-one years ago)

I think they do say it, in every episode of v. mars.

― RJG (RJG), Wednesday, 18 May 2005 16:38 (twenty-one years ago)

Nick Cave's got like 65 songs with that in the chorus.

― Gear! (can Jung shill it, Mu?) (Gear!), Wednesday, 18 May 2005 16:45 (twenty-one years ago)

Somehow I don't think this thread went where Kenan wanted it to go.

― The Ghost of Dan Perry (Dan Perry), Wednesday, 18 May 2005 16:46 (twenty-one years ago)

In a world where Lucy Ricardo (nee Magilicuddy) is revered as a comic genius of towering proportions and Fonzie is fondly recalled as a paragon of comic characterization, it seems odd to complain of the Simpsons recent offerings.

― Aimless (Aimless), Wednesday, 18 May 2005 16:54 (twenty-one years ago)

I still enjoy the Simpsons mostly.

― M. White (Miguelito), Wednesday, 18 May 2005 16:58 (twenty-one years ago)

But its current incarnation is increasingly tarnishing the show's past reputation. Kill it now, and we'll always have seasons 1 (or 2) through 7 (or 8) to hold in highest esteem.

― slightly more subdued (kenan), Wednesday, 18 May 2005 16:58 (twenty-one years ago)

Since I don't have any financial interest in Fox or the Simpsons, I couldn't care less about it's being held in high esteem by other people.

― M. White (Miguelito), Wednesday, 18 May 2005 17:00 (twenty-one years ago)

Beloved seems to be said as two syllables more often as an adjective than a noun. This isn't meant to imply that I know of any justification for that, but it's my impression.

Lucy was terrific for many years - she was a really good comic actress. Fonzie was just a nice gimmick that got old pretty quickly. But really, Aimless, I agree. Then again, I put up with Roseanne's mega-decline, watching it right to the end.

― Martin Skidmore (Martin Skidmore), Wednesday, 18 May 2005 17:01 (twenty-one years ago)

Yeah, Roseanne winning the lottery was one of those massive, show-killing, insanely bad ideas. Like when Maddie Hayes finally slept with David Addison, and then nobody wanted to watch the show anymore.

― slightly more subdued (kenan), Wednesday, 18 May 2005 17:06 (twenty-one years ago)

the simpsons is funny

― RJG (RJG), Wednesday, 18 May 2005 17:07 (twenty-one years ago)

It's more unfunny than it is funny.

The only late-era Roseanne show I saw was where she'd won the Lottery or something and went to New York and bumped into Jennifer Saunders playing a character much like Eddie from Ab Fab if not actually her. This scene seems a lot funnier than any recent Simpsons I've seen although my memory is poor wrt to the former.

― $V£N! (blueski), Wednesday, 18 May 2005 17:08 (twenty-one years ago)

(BTW -- Moonlighting finally sorted out its music licensing issues, and will be released on DVD May 31. If you care. I do.)

― slightly more subdued (kenan), Wednesday, 18 May 2005 17:09 (twenty-one years ago)

Say what? I thought it had been out on DVD for ages, I'm sure I saw it...probably just a VHS pack. Anyway this is GREAT news.

― $V£N! (blueski), Wednesday, 18 May 2005 17:15 (twenty-one years ago)

http://www.moonlightingdvd.com/

― slightly more subdued (kenan), Wednesday, 18 May 2005 17:18 (twenty-one years ago)

it's not like they're going to replace it with anything better. And AD owed whatever ratings it managed to garner by following the Simpsons. so for the Bluth's sake, let's keep watching the Simpsons.

― Sym Sym (sym), Wednesday, 18 May 2005 17:21 (twenty-one years ago)

You make a strong point.

― slightly more subdued (kenan), Wednesday, 18 May 2005 17:21 (twenty-one years ago)

a weak episode of the Simpsons is still better than 90% else of what's out there.

― Miss Misery (thatgirl), Wednesday, 18 May 2005 17:21 (twenty-one years ago)

It's kinda the Cosby factor all over again -- long after the show started to suck, it still had this titanic power of the market that it no longer deserved. Which is kind of a shame.

― slightly more subdued (kenan), Wednesday, 18 May 2005 17:23 (twenty-one years ago)

overreliance on guest voices too.

― Gear! (can Jung shill it, Mu?) (Gear!), Wednesday, 18 May 2005 17:24 (twenty-one years ago)

Kenan, you just love tipping sacred cows don't you?

― Miss Misery (thatgirl), Wednesday, 18 May 2005 17:25 (twenty-one years ago)

I can't believe that there are people on ILX that still aren't tired about talking about this.

― n/a (Nick A.), Wednesday, 18 May 2005 17:25 (twenty-one years ago)

perhaps this is the thread that will signal ILX's Marcello-predicted oblivion!

― Gear! (can Jung shill it, Mu?) (Gear!), Wednesday, 18 May 2005 17:27 (twenty-one years ago)

ILX in one beating shit to death shoxor.

xpost

― diedre mousedropping and a quarter (Dave225), Wednesday, 18 May 2005 17:27 (twenty-one years ago)

I don't think it's much of a sacred cow. It's generally acknowledged that the show is a hollow shell of what it once was. What I'm saying is -- don't watch it AT ALL. EUTHANIZE THE POOR THING.

― slightly more subdued (kenan), Wednesday, 18 May 2005 17:30 (twenty-one years ago)

Though this thread might have been worth it solely for the phrase "tipping sacred cows."

― n/a (Nick A.), Wednesday, 18 May 2005 17:31 (twenty-one years ago)

"What? Your sister is dying of tuberculosis? You should just SHOOT HER IN THE FACE!"

― n/a (Nick A.), Wednesday, 18 May 2005 17:32 (twenty-one years ago)

No, no. Lethal injection. Let her go quietly.

― slightly more subdued (kenan), Wednesday, 18 May 2005 17:32 (twenty-one years ago)

Feel free. Knock yourself out. But what is strange is that you should care, beyond that simple act of stopping watching it yourself. Not that acting strangely is so very odd. We all act strangely.

― Aimless (Aimless), Wednesday, 18 May 2005 17:33 (twenty-one years ago)

Though this thread might have been worth it solely for the phrase "tipping sacred cows."

I know, right? It's a Southern thing.

― slightly more subdued (kenan), Wednesday, 18 May 2005 17:33 (twenty-one years ago)

But what is strange is that you should care, beyond that simple act of stopping watching it yourself.

I guess I need help. I'm still tempted to watch. And then... disappointed. Like an alcoholic who really wants a drink, and then is really sorry he had one. I can't be all alone... can I?

― slightly more subdued (kenan), Wednesday, 18 May 2005 17:35 (twenty-one years ago)

whenever I regret giving into that drink I just have another and it's all good.

― Miss Misery (thatgirl), Wednesday, 18 May 2005 17:41 (twenty-one years ago)

Yeah, that metaphor breaks down pretty quickly. Maybe... maybe the Old Simpsons is like fine Scotch, and the last three years are like Old Crow...

No, not that either. Forget it.

― slightly more subdued (kenan), Wednesday, 18 May 2005 17:43 (twenty-one years ago)

The Simpsons is in such uncharted territory. An animated series running prime time for FIFTEEN years with yet more new episodes to come. It ain't natural I tells ya. I think it would be impossible for any show to maintain quality once it peaked (and it did take a few years for this to happen). Unnatural long life, in addition to the monkey's paw, brings with it a terrible curse. The meta is also reaching dizzy new heights (of unfunniness, natch) - I caught part of an episode last week that saw Homer converting a South Pacific island tribe to his kind of lifestyle, but just as he and the island's equivalent of Lisa were about to die as the makeshift church he'd built for the tribe caught fire and collapsed on top of them, it cut to the Telathon woman (and the unmistakeable voice by Betty White) saying 'pledge more now to see the rest of the show' or somesuch with Rupert Murdoch (yes they're still not tired of taking the permitted piss out of he) in the background demanding more money. They've pretty much given up on story completion and continuity basically, because that's gotten too boring and predictable in itself for a show that's been around this long, but what you end up with in place of that isn't very satisfying either (or funny) to me. But that's a pretty rockist view I grant thee.

― $V£N! (blueski), Wednesday, 18 May 2005 19:13 (twenty-one years ago)

Can we devote our time to something more valuable, like a pledge to make Lindsay Lohan go out and eat some damn food?

― n/a (Nick A.), Wednesday, 18 May 2005 19:16 (twenty-one years ago)

You had me until the food part.

― d'ngullberry (noisemeltdown), Wednesday, 18 May 2005 19:27 (twenty-one years ago)

Can we devote our time to something more valuable

Haha like what? Doing some work during the workday? Pfft.

― slightly more subdued (kenan), Wednesday, 18 May 2005 20:18 (twenty-one years ago)

Though this thread might have been worth it solely for the phrase "tipping sacred cows."

I know, right? It's a Southern thing.

They don't have cows up north, like in WISCONSIN?

― Pleasant Plains /// (Pleasant Plains ///), Wednesday, 18 May 2005 20:26 (twenty-one years ago)

No. No they don't.

― slightly more subdued (kenan), Wednesday, 18 May 2005 20:28 (twenty-one years ago)

Well, they do, but they don't tip them. They milk them and make delicious cheese hats.

― slightly more subdued (kenan), Wednesday, 18 May 2005 20:30 (twenty-one years ago)

I caught part of an episode last week that saw Homer converting a South Pacific island tribe to his kind of lifestyle, but just as he and the island's equivalent of Lisa were about to die as the makeshift church he'd built for the tribe caught fire and collapsed on top of them, it cut to the Telathon woman (and the unmistakeable voice by Betty White) saying 'pledge more now to see the rest of the show' or somesuch with Rupert Murdoch (yes they're still not tired of taking the permitted piss out of he) in the background demanding more money. They've pretty much given up on story completion and continuity basically... [snip]

Erm, except thats actually a fairly old episode, and the non-sequiter non-ending joke has been done many times on the show - I dont think it is fair to accuse them of it now as if they're doing it because they're out of ideas. Remember the show ending where they all just suddenly went surfing for no reason? Come on, that absurd shit is funny! :)

There is only one thing that would have me supporting a stop to the Simpsons: a long-term return of Futurama. Ive rewatched all of Futurama quite a bit and have realised there are sutble lovely threads of story that were tossed out there and never got a chance to be resolved, because it got cancelled. A good example being in "The Why of Fry" where Fry finds out hes the only one who can fight the brains, ends up ina parallel universe, has to go back to 1999 and start all over again etc - in that ep a comment is also made about Leela "also being the One". That was never elaborated on, and Ive a feeling it might have been had the show continued.

But while I think the Simpsons is certainly reaching a bit too much these days, we're unfairly comparing it to itself for lack of other comparisons, which just doesn't work, IMNSHO.

― Trayce (trayce), Wednesday, 18 May 2005 22:32 (twenty-one years ago)

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