Appalling attack on the Lambrini Girl way of life

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http://www.timesonline.co.uk/article/0,,2-1710050,00.html

Watchdogs have issued a list of undesirable male characteristics that advertisers must abide by in order to comply with tougher rules designed to separate alcohol from sexual success.

Lambrini, the popular sparkling drink, is the first to suffer. Its manufacturers have complained after watchdogs rejected its latest campaign because it depicted women flirting with a man who was deemed too attractive.

First they came for the Lambrini Girls and I did nothing, because I was not a Lambrini Girl...

― Alba (Alba), Wednesday, 27 July 2005 10:01 (twenty years ago)

That is the most bizarre thing I've read in a long time.

It's OK to have three girls drinking and pulling *unattractive* men? Are they trying to go for the truth in advertising thing of portraying beer goggles?

It's hillarious.

― It Is What A Man Does Which Demeans Him, Not What Is Done To Him (kate), Wednesday, 27 July 2005 10:05 (twenty years ago)

...

Lambrini Girls and I did nothing, because I was not a Lambrini Girl, etc.

― Alba (Alba), Wednesday, 27 July 2005 10:06 (twenty years ago)

It certainly puts paid to all those shmindie notions about attractiveness being completely in the eye of the beholder. The Committee of Advertising Practice should set up an amihotornot rating service.

― Alba (Alba), Wednesday, 27 July 2005 10:08 (twenty years ago)

maybe a more accurate portrayal of who one usually finds in bars? C'mon Dunedinites, when was the last time you pulled a hunk/babe at the crown. Actually when was the last time you pulled anyone in the crown...

So the women must be less attractive too? not that I think Lambrini girls are attractive, saw pictures of them for the first time today and they epitomise all those values I loathe.

Bloody hell I'm a party pooper

― Menelaus Darcy (Menelaus Darcy), Wednesday, 27 July 2005 10:15 (twenty years ago)

Oh my god, they just get skankier and skankier, I had to call my flatmate over to share the horror

― Menelaus Darcy (Menelaus Darcy), Wednesday, 27 July 2005 10:18 (twenty years ago)

can we have three unattractive fat girls in some beer ad's as well then

― battlingspacemonkey (battlingspacemonkey), Wednesday, 27 July 2005 10:27 (twenty years ago)

Are the girls on that Lambrini website sposed to be good looking? Geezum, blergh.

― Trayce (trayce), Wednesday, 27 July 2005 10:32 (twenty years ago)

and also people with sick down their front xpost

― shine headlights on me (electricsound), Wednesday, 27 July 2005 10:32 (twenty years ago)

I don't quite understand why this article focuses so much on adverts geared towards women featuring attractive men, when surely vice versa will be banned as well (and aren't there more adverts for drinks featuring attractive women, like the Bacardi ones?)

I wonder if this is a step towards the advertising of alcohol being banned completely.

― Cathy (Cathy), Wednesday, 27 July 2005 10:48 (twenty years ago)

It's been a while since I've seen a "Swedish Bikini Team" type overt advert, but I understand what you mean. Seems a bit twisted and gender-skewed.

― It Is What A Man Does Which Demeans Him, Not What Is Done To Him (kate), Wednesday, 27 July 2005 10:52 (twenty years ago)

if they ban alcohol and ciggarettes in uk i am jumping ship....hello to my lovely french cousins

― battlingspacemonkey (battlingspacemonkey), Wednesday, 27 July 2005 10:53 (twenty years ago)

What about those Lynx ads?

― Jarlr'mai (jarlrmai), Wednesday, 27 July 2005 10:56 (twenty years ago)

Surely no one drinks Lynx!

― It Is What A Man Does Which Demeans Him, Not What Is Done To Him (kate), Wednesday, 27 July 2005 10:56 (twenty years ago)

binge deodorising

― Britain's Jauntiest Shepherd (Alan), Wednesday, 27 July 2005 10:57 (twenty years ago)

"bachelor's shower"

― shine headlights on me (electricsound), Wednesday, 27 July 2005 10:58 (twenty years ago)

yeah don't they know that Lynx is appaling bad for your sex life? thry shou;d have a 15 year old spotty boy spraying in all over himself *liberally* with Lynx- next shot on the bus a woman retching *god what is that awful smell* along with bottles with giant white label- black lettering government issue health warnings.

― battlingspacemonkey (battlingspacemonkey), Wednesday, 27 July 2005 10:59 (twenty years ago)

ahaha

― shine headlights on me (electricsound), Wednesday, 27 July 2005 11:01 (twenty years ago)

this is utterly bizarre. and probably counterproductive. the main thing that this article left me with is the urge to pick up several bottles of lambrini on my way home tonight.

― lauren (laurenp), Wednesday, 27 July 2005 11:03 (twenty years ago)

I used to flat with a guy who never showered, just used lynx. It mingled with his body odour in the most ungodly way, you could almost taste it.

― Menelaus Darcy (Menelaus Darcy), Wednesday, 27 July 2005 11:12 (twenty years ago)

Does he live/travel into london?if so i think i smelt him the other day.... *retch*

― battlingspacemonkey (battlingspacemonkey), Wednesday, 27 July 2005 11:18 (twenty years ago)

It's OK to have three girls drinking and pulling *unattractive* men?

It's long been the case that the UK advertising code has outlawed any campaign that implies alcohol may bring sexual success. I think by saying the man that the girls hook should be "overweight, middle-aged, balding etc." they mean that that would change the implication of the advert's story - that the girls would be assumed to just be doing it for a laugh rather than to gain a sexual partner. If they actually showed them partnering off with the baldie, then that would be unacceptable too.

― Alba (Alba), Wednesday, 27 July 2005 11:55 (twenty years ago)

If saying that overweight, middle-aged, balding etc automatically means non sexual isn't blatant discrimination then I don't know what is.

― Jarlr'mai (jarlrmai), Wednesday, 27 July 2005 12:11 (twenty years ago)

Lambrini Girls have high standards.

― Alba (Alba), Wednesday, 27 July 2005 12:26 (twenty years ago)

The thing is, Jimmy, 30-second adverts use physical stereotypes as a shorthand for character development all the time. It's kind of unrealistic to expect them to abandon all that, which is why the ruling makes a kind of sense, even if it's badly worded/quoted out of context.

― Alba (Alba), Wednesday, 27 July 2005 12:30 (twenty years ago)

If they actually showed them partnering off with the baldie, then that would be unacceptable too.

― Markelby (Mark C), Wednesday, 27 July 2005 12:42 (twenty years ago)

Bollocks to it then, they should show them getting date-raped in a nova outside TGI Fridays on a soulless leisure complex to the strains of "Hey Baby"

― Jarlr'mai (jarlrmai), Wednesday, 27 July 2005 12:55 (twenty years ago)

err..

― Alba (Alba), Wednesday, 27 July 2005 13:04 (twenty years ago)

'...'

― N_RQ, Wednesday, 27 July 2005 13:06 (twenty years ago)

The last one seemed wrong, in this case.

― Alba (Alba), Wednesday, 27 July 2005 13:07 (twenty years ago)

or maybe not.

― Jarlr'mai (jarlrmai), Wednesday, 27 July 2005 13:18 (twenty years ago)

There were very strange adverts on the busses in Oxford which Johnney and Mark had to explain to me, and still didn't make any sense. Something about an attractive girl going "make sure if he's drunk, he doesn't get laid" or something like that. I could make no sense of them.

― It Is What A Man Does Which Demeans Him, Not What Is Done To Him (kate), Wednesday, 27 July 2005 13:19 (twenty years ago)

If all of Budweiser's advertising were clips from Gummo with the logo superimposed at the end, people would still drink fucking Budweiser in vast quantities. And no matter how many times some famke jannsen lookalike gives a you-want-to-do-a-poo-in-my-flange stare to some dude in a dark buttondown shirt in the world's cleanest nightclub, I am not actually going to begin drinking Cuervo Gold or Disaronno or whatever the fuck have you.

The Big Lebowski is the greatest thing to ever happen to Kahlua and at one point the protagonist is stuck in a dirty bathtub with a screeching ferret. Oh and he's also an unemployed bum.

― TOMBOT, Wednesday, 27 July 2005 13:26 (twenty years ago)

ME NAN DRINKS IT AND PULLED ME AND I SHOVED THE BOTTLE IN HER FLAN

― GARUah G Azzahole (blueski), Wednesday, 27 July 2005 13:30 (twenty years ago)

If they actually want to make people not drink anymore, they should just superimpose a pictures of A) your mom looking pissed off B) Begbie making an ass of himself C) Nicholas Cage dying in Leaving Las Vegas at the bottom of every single liquor/beer advert.

They should also do this with porn and cigarettes!

― Allyzay knows a little German (allyzay), Thursday, 28 July 2005 14:25 (twenty years ago)

Nicolas Cage wanking himself into oblivion would have made a much better movie.

― Alba (Alba), Thursday, 28 July 2005 14:28 (twenty years ago)

What?!?!? Masturbation is BAD for you? Argh!

― Masonic Boom (kate), Thursday, 28 July 2005 14:29 (twenty years ago)

Yeah it's a much less common problem than drinking yourself to death. Who besides Lifetime will have the guts to tackle this issue of wanking yourself into oblivion? Not Nick Cage, I'll tell you that much :(

― Allyzay knows a little German (allyzay), Thursday, 28 July 2005 14:30 (twenty years ago)

Perhaps they should just ban adverts from lying. Oh hang on, that's the entire industry fucked.

― Anti-Pope Consortium (noodle vague), Thursday, 28 July 2005 14:32 (twenty years ago)

But I thought that all men had to wank five times a ~~day~~ week or else their prostrate glands would explode or they'd get urethral cancer or something!

― Masonic Boom (kate), Thursday, 28 July 2005 14:34 (twenty years ago)

Right. Like I need an excuse.

― Anti-Pope Consortium (noodle vague), Thursday, 28 July 2005 14:36 (twenty years ago)

Kate, we're saying that Nick Cage would have to masturbate so much that the skin starts coming off, and he doesn't eat anymore...or do anything else...and withers away slowly. That's what we meant, when we're discussing him masturbating into oblivion.

― Allyzay knows a little German (allyzay), Thursday, 28 July 2005 14:43 (twenty years ago)

They should save that for Se7en 2: 8ight.

― Anti-Pope Consortium (noodle vague), Thursday, 28 July 2005 14:45 (twenty years ago)

hahaha that shouldn't be as funny as it is, should it?

― Allyzay knows a little German (allyzay), Thursday, 28 July 2005 14:46 (twenty years ago)

You remember those Medieval villains who were sentanced to death by The King? Except, because they were noblemen, they were allowed to choose their method of execution. And one chose to be drowned in a vat of Claret?

Well, if I were ever a medieval nobleman in trouble with the king, I would ask to be wanked to oblivion. That sounds great.

― Masonic Boom (kate), Thursday, 28 July 2005 14:48 (twenty years ago)

I think I've just discovered my preferred method of suicide.

xpost: prob'ly not Ally, are you on the gin?

― Anti-Pope Consortium (noodle vague), Thursday, 28 July 2005 14:50 (twenty years ago)

I never drink gin! I resent the accusation that I'd drink gin!

― Allyzay knows a little German (allyzay), Thursday, 28 July 2005 14:54 (twenty years ago)

What popular brands of perry are available in the American market?

― Alba (Alba), Thursday, 28 July 2005 14:55 (twenty years ago)

there's Dan, for one.

― Sterling Clover (s_clover), Thursday, 28 July 2005 14:56 (twenty years ago)

If I got sentenced to death in medieval times by a King and was meant to choose my method of death, I would choose to do rails until my brain explodes! Which would've been impossible, in medieval times, so instead I'd just probably smoke a lot of cigarettes and wait to get cancer.

― Allyzay knows a little German (allyzay), Thursday, 28 July 2005 14:57 (twenty years ago)

Skipping 35 messages at this point... Click here if you want to load them all.

I obviously prefer to think of it as an admiring leer.

― Anti-Pope Consortium (noodle vague), Thursday, 28 July 2005 15:28 (twenty years ago)

FEAR OF HER OWN IMPULSES TO REACH OUT AND GRAB 'EM.

Is that ok?

― Allyzay knows a little German (allyzay), Thursday, 28 July 2005 15:29 (twenty years ago)

The blonde is a bit like Cate Blanchett if she ate food, come to think of it.

― Anti-Pope Consortium (noodle vague), Thursday, 28 July 2005 15:29 (twenty years ago)

I liked it so much better when this thread was in the Middle Ages.

:-(

― Masonic Boom (kate), Thursday, 28 July 2005 15:31 (twenty years ago)

Eating food gives you DD boobs now?

― Alba (Alba), Thursday, 28 July 2005 15:31 (twenty years ago)

It's got to help.

― Anti-Pope Consortium (noodle vague), Thursday, 28 July 2005 15:32 (twenty years ago)

well it can but it probably won't keep your face and neck and arms as slender as that woman's is, via the "food" method I mean.

― Allyzay knows a little German (allyzay), Thursday, 28 July 2005 15:32 (twenty years ago)

Sorry Kate, pass the witchy bread pleez.

― Anti-Pope Consortium (noodle vague), Thursday, 28 July 2005 15:33 (twenty years ago)

Lauren Bacall looks like she's too preoccupied with vampire blood lust for Bogey's neck in that photo for her to care about him perving on Marilyn's cleavage.

― Alba (Alba), Thursday, 28 July 2005 15:33 (twenty years ago)

I wasn't suggesting that Skyy-blonde was normal-shaped, just that facially she slighty resembles a non-anorexic Cate Blanchett.

― Anti-Pope Consortium (noodle vague), Thursday, 28 July 2005 15:34 (twenty years ago)

http://us.greet1.yimg.com/img.greetings.yahoo.com/g/img/gocard/skyy_kitten.jpg

Why can I not stop looking for more of these posters?

(what on earth is a trebuchet? x-posts)

― Cathy (Cathy), Thursday, 28 July 2005 15:35 (twenty years ago)

A trebuchet is a way of sending ergot-riddled trip-buns to peasants on the other side of the valley.

― Anti-Pope Consortium (noodle vague), Thursday, 28 July 2005 15:36 (twenty years ago)

I really want some SKYY Vodka now. Not just because it will bring me sexual success/let me look down women's tops, though obviously that will happen.

― Alba (Alba), Thursday, 28 July 2005 15:37 (twenty years ago)

What was I thinking buying Glenn's??

― Cathy (Cathy), Thursday, 28 July 2005 15:39 (twenty years ago)

I really want some ergot now.

― Anti-Pope Consortium (noodle vague), Thursday, 28 July 2005 15:43 (twenty years ago)

SKYY BLUE isn't my scene so much, I don't think.

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v417/albaalba/ilx/30skyy.jpg

― Alba (Alba), Thursday, 28 July 2005 15:46 (twenty years ago)

You could look down women's tops without drinking Skyy, I do it all the time.

― Allyzay knows a little German (allyzay), Thursday, 28 July 2005 15:46 (twenty years ago)

(is it for the gay market, given how he's completely ignoring her advances by looking through her legs?)

― Alba (Alba), Thursday, 28 July 2005 15:47 (twenty years ago)

Maybe he's been blinded by the copious amounts of glitter she's covered her thighs in, and doesn't even know where to look anymore? Did you consider this?

― Allyzay knows a little German (allyzay), Thursday, 28 July 2005 15:47 (twenty years ago)

This changes everything:

ihttp://www.allthingsdeep.com/Images/skyy.jpg

― Alba (Alba), Thursday, 28 July 2005 15:48 (twenty years ago)

You people are preventing me from singlehandedly doing all the work required for this "group project" that's due this afternoon and studying for my final. Well, the final is open-book. But still.

― TOMBOT, Thursday, 28 July 2005 15:49 (twenty years ago)

it's obviously for gays, yes, because he's looking at YOU

crosspost

― RJG (RJG), Thursday, 28 July 2005 15:49 (twenty years ago)

http://us.greet1.yimg.com/img.greetings.yahoo.com/g/img/gocard/skyy_kitten.jpg

I think I am very susceptible to this kind of advertising.

― Cathy (Cathy), Thursday, 28 July 2005 15:51 (twenty years ago)

In the Cutty Sark Whiskey ad, this woman is obviously not a sailor ; she is clearly only there for decorative purposes

I love the rockist sailor indignation in this page

― Alba (Alba), Thursday, 28 July 2005 15:51 (twenty years ago)

Haha, I was laughing at that too. We are following the same googletrail.

― Cathy (Cathy), Thursday, 28 July 2005 15:52 (twenty years ago)

Keep posting that one Cathy, I do like it.

― Alba (Alba), Thursday, 28 July 2005 15:52 (twenty years ago)

http://apgraph.com/wine/Graphics/posters/posters_skyy.jpg

― Alba (Alba), Thursday, 28 July 2005 15:52 (twenty years ago)

whoops. I meant this one. http://us.greet1.yimg.com/img.greetings.yahoo.com/g/img/gocard/skyy_kitten.jpg

― Cathy (Cathy), Thursday, 28 July 2005 15:53 (twenty years ago)

what??

― Cathy (Cathy), Thursday, 28 July 2005 15:54 (twenty years ago)

Do it again.

― Alba (Alba), Thursday, 28 July 2005 16:00 (twenty years ago)

That was really a genuine mistake, not some kind of aggressive perving.

― Cathy (Cathy), Thursday, 28 July 2005 16:01 (twenty years ago)

Wow, I had never associated booze and sex before. I don't fancy the cat tho.

― Anti-Pope Consortium (noodle vague), Thursday, 28 July 2005 16:02 (twenty years ago)

http://www.commercialcloset.org/images/data/COMCLOSET_PICS/picture/2982.JPG

I was right! Skyy Blue is for the gay market.

― Alba (Alba), Thursday, 28 July 2005 16:05 (twenty years ago)

That man has breasts. And the elephant trunk makes me uncomfortable.

― Cathy (Cathy), Thursday, 28 July 2005 16:06 (twenty years ago)

Also bestiality, apparently.

― Anti-Pope Consortium (noodle vague), Thursday, 28 July 2005 16:07 (twenty years ago)

Is this better?:

http://www.commercialcloset.org/images/data/COMCLOSET_PICS/picture/4886.JPG

― Alba (Alba), Thursday, 28 July 2005 16:08 (twenty years ago)

come on, they are clearly trassexuals, alba

― RJG (RJG), Thursday, 28 July 2005 16:09 (twenty years ago)

I mean N.

― RJG (RJG), Thursday, 28 July 2005 16:09 (twenty years ago)

http://www.commercialcloset.org/images/data/COMCLOSET_PICS/picture/2862.JPG

I can't quite decide what is going on in this one.

― Cathy (Cathy), Thursday, 28 July 2005 16:11 (twenty years ago)

from alba's link Since 2001, Skyy vodka has gotten much more daring in its gay-targeted print advertising, beginning with an effort that took on the hot topic of same-sex marriage.

― RJG (RJG), Thursday, 28 July 2005 16:12 (twenty years ago)

http://www.commercialcloset.org/images/data/COMCLOSET_PICS/picture/1040.JPG

"The Intelligent Drink" doesn't quite have the same impact.

― Cathy (Cathy), Thursday, 28 July 2005 16:13 (twenty years ago)

Anyway, Skyy Vodka doesn't give me the same thrill it once did. Now I'm all about FLIRT vodka.

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v417/albaalba/ilx/flirtvodka.jpg

― Alba (Alba), Thursday, 28 July 2005 16:19 (twenty years ago)

O! M!! G!!!

― Anti-Pope Consortium (noodle vague), Thursday, 28 July 2005 16:20 (twenty years ago)

You can't see it, but in response to a Russian Committee of Advertising Practice directive, the woman is overweight, middle-aged and balding.

― Alba (Alba), Thursday, 28 July 2005 16:32 (twenty years ago)

http://www.bg-lesbian.com/Reklamata_web/bilbord/alkohol/beefeater_big.jpg

Beefeater have got it all wrong.

― Cathy (Cathy), Thursday, 28 July 2005 16:34 (twenty years ago)

bg-lesbian.com is kind of terrifying.

― Alba (Alba), Thursday, 28 July 2005 16:37 (twenty years ago)

Apparently, this is what passes for a lesbian greetings card in Bulgaria:

http://www.bg-lesbian.com/kartichki/images/glavna6.jpg

― Alba (Alba), Thursday, 28 July 2005 16:39 (twenty years ago)

That site is quite rude. I wonder why Reebok are popularizing Bulgarian lesbianism?

― Cathy (Cathy), Thursday, 28 July 2005 16:43 (twenty years ago)

Well, if someone offers you the chance to popularize Bulgarian lesbianism, it's hard to turn it down.

― Alba (Alba), Thursday, 28 July 2005 16:44 (twenty years ago)

The one with Kyle MacLachlan in it...he looks so sad, like he's drinking to hide away the memories of losing his career. That one always unsettled me a bit.

― Allyzay knows a little German (allyzay), Thursday, 28 July 2005 17:14 (twenty years ago)

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