This is the thread where we invent a Bush croney, give him/her some background, and then nominate them for something inappropriate

Who needs inventing? (Is still ambassador to Spain, I believe.)

Newport Beach - ugh.

Yeah, but countries like Spain are just where croneys belong. *Inappropriate* nomination, says I.

BUT THEY WUZ ALLIES IN ZE WAR ON TERROR! Until the goddamn gay-loving commies won that election.

Guess who...

******'s record of mistakes begins in 1959, when Tom Stroock, a Republican politician-businessman ... got ******, then a senior at ******* County High School, a scholarship to Yale. "**** was the all-American boy, in the top ten percent of his class," Stroock says. "He seemed a natural." But instead of triumphing, ****** failed. "He spent his time partying with guys who loved football but weren't varsity quality," recalls Stephen Billings, an Episcopalian minister who roomed with him during ******'s freshman (and only full) year at Yale. "His idea was, you didn't need to master the material," says his other roommate, Jacob Plotkin. "He passed one psych course without attending class or studying, and he was proud of that. But there are some things you can't bluff, and **** reached a point where you couldn't recover."

****** might have been flunking in the classroom, but he excelled at making connections....
Mark Furcolo, whose father, Foster, had been elected governor as a Democrat, invited ****** to Cape Cod for a visit. "**** came back enraptured," Plotkin says. "He was fascinated by the official state cars and planes. The trappings of it got him."

It could have been the start of a brilliant career -- in the Massachusetts of the 1960s, it would not have been too great a leap from the Furcolos to the Kennedys. Instead, after only one term as a Yale sophomore, ****** dropped out. "**** never had the experience of learning from his mistakes," says Tom Fake, a Natrona classmate who also won a Yale scholarship. But he learned something perhaps more important to this future success. "He found a path that got him into powerful positions" is how Plotkin puts it.

After leaving Yale, ****** had one of his few experiences working in the private sector, on a telephone-company repair crew. He showed no interest, one way or another, in the Vietnam War -- until a Texas president, nearly forty years before George W. Bush, turned a remote foreign struggle into a catastrophic, unwinnable war. Thanks to Lyndon Johnson's escalation of Vietnam, lounging around was suddenly no longer an option. ****** snapped into action. ...
All told, between 1963 and 1966, ****** received five deferments.

etc.

Tracey "Buzz" Babbs - Former Houston Oilers owner and beef rancher from the Texas Panhandle. A tough, scrappy micromanager known for her hearty laugh and off-color comments. Recently acquired a majority share of NuTech, a consulting and construction firm working out of Dallas and Bagdad. Nomination: Energy Policy Czar (a newly invented post).

That's the spirit!

Terry "Tex" Montaine. Investment broker. Worked closely with Bush managing family funds. Schooled with Karl Rove (they belonged to the same frat). Fear of heights.

Nominated: head of FAA.

Alex "The Admiral" Martinez. Subway Sandwich Artist. Always happy to add extra sauce to Bush's 12-inch Sweet Onion Chicken Teriyaki on white. Once failed to charge for extra meat.

Nominated: Secretary of Labor