Weird things that happen to you but you don't mention them because people will think you're weird.

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I was talking to a friend yesterday and the conversation came round to this, for some reason. From since I can remember up until my teenage years, less-so nowadays but still occasionally. I'll be alone in the house or I'll be lying in bed, thinking about the day's events - things that have happened to me or things people have said, when all of a sudden the tone of my thoughts takes a sneering, sarcastic tone.

I described it to my friend and she said she'd had something very similar. It's very hard to describe but it's as if my internal monologue has been replaced by someone else who really won't take anything very seriously and relays all my thoughts back to me in a "well, didn't you do well today, I don't think" kind of way.

It's not so much WHAT is being said in my head, more just the tone and pitch. And sometimes I remember a barely-audible frequency accompanying it. It's not scarey, so much as interesting and a bit strange. I remember telling my dad about it once and saying "It feels like people are shouting at me". I'd just had my bicycle stolen that day and I was quite tired and upset about it at the time.

Anyone else get this, or used to get this or am I a weirdo?

Also, feel free to discuss any other weird things that happen to you but you're not sure if it's only you.

― Carl Handwriting (dog latin), Friday, 30 December 2005 14:39 (twenty years ago)

I wore my underwear backwards all day yesterday.

― Spink, Friday, 30 December 2005 14:51 (twenty years ago)

[runs away]

― grimly fiendish (grimlord), Friday, 30 December 2005 14:55 (twenty years ago)

I have certain compound words and combinations of words that stick in my head and won't leave, and I feel like saying them out loud all the time but I don't.

SCOREBOARD BLOWTORCH is a good example, but there are others from time to time. I have also always thought that POPUP BLOCKA would be fun to yell at people.

― TOMBOT, Friday, 30 December 2005 15:12 (twenty years ago)

Also I wore my boxers backwards, with the flap-button sitting right there between my ass cheeks, for almost all day on a weekend a couple weeks ago or so.

― TOMBOT, Friday, 30 December 2005 15:13 (twenty years ago)

I have a game I play whilst doing housework. It involves me being a revolutionary herione forced to work as a maid undercover, utill I can earn enough money to escape. It's more complex than that, especially as I've been doing this for roughly 15 years, but it's too difficult to explain it in depth. Yes, let's all spot the only child who has lived in her own head for too long.

― Anna (Anna), Friday, 30 December 2005 15:42 (twenty years ago)

i get abducted by the california raisins every quarter-moon

― latebloomer (latebloomer), Friday, 30 December 2005 15:46 (twenty years ago)

I get phrases sticking in my head that won't go away for an hour or so, or until I become so absorbed (usually washing the dishes or something) that I find myself muttering them out loud.

― patrick bateman (mickeygraft), Friday, 30 December 2005 17:54 (twenty years ago)

Yeah, so, we always had to go to bed kind of early and I usually wasn't sleepy and wasn't allowed to read after bedtime, so I cooked up this crazy series of fantasies instead, that involved me being something of a superhero. Only the qualities that seem superheroic to a seven-year-old bookworm and social incompetent probably aren't the usual thing and are too silly to here recount. BUT IN ADDITION, I would have episodes of contrariness, in which things I knew were wrong, even blasphemous, would play and replay themselves in my thoughts, and since I had learned that "sin is any thought, word, or deed contrary to the will of God" I just KNEW I would be possibly damned, certainly called to account in the hereafter, for the actions of my rebellious brane. Ahhhh the care-free innocence of childhood.

― Laurel (Laurel), Friday, 30 December 2005 18:05 (twenty years ago)

I've played a game where I make bets about the dire consequences of missing the bin when throwing a tea bag from the cup to the bin. Usually involves promising to jump off a bridge or some such suicidal act. Luckily, the gods rarely keep score, and allow me to go for best out of three (or five etc).

I also played a 'game' about how many times I can say a phrase between the phone rings when waiting for people to pick up the phone; it's a verbal equivalent of trying to eat more than 3 cream crackers in one minute.

― Dave B (daveb), Friday, 30 December 2005 18:07 (twenty years ago)

for some reason over the past year or so, without thinking about it, as i crank the car and pull away from the curb i'll go "all i wanna do is zooma zoom zoom zoom inna boom boom." and then i go wtf?! i did it again?! it's not every time. maybe two, three times a week. and only when i'm alone. and in a decent mood.

― andrew m. (andrewmorgan), Friday, 30 December 2005 18:38 (twenty years ago)

I have a few singsongy phrases, like andrew m's, that I use in different situations like being late etc and I'm always 'god, shut up!' to myself whenever it happens. Not as cute as am's though.

My big thing though is that automatic doors have never opened for me. I know it makes no logical sense. I have to wait for someone else to come along or jump up and down like a spaz and then have to wait anyway.

― sunny successor (katharine), Friday, 30 December 2005 19:12 (twenty years ago)

So you're a vampire, it happens to everyone.

― nabisco (nabisco), Friday, 30 December 2005 19:34 (twenty years ago)

I get the same thing as tombot!

― Thermo Thinwall (Thermo Thinwall), Friday, 30 December 2005 20:16 (twenty years ago)

In his 1st post at least.

― Thermo Thinwall (Thermo Thinwall), Friday, 30 December 2005 20:16 (twenty years ago)

Hummingbirds have a tendency to stop 3-4 inches in front of my face: on more than one occasion I've had to freeze while walking to avoid bashing into them.
(a)This happens at least once a month.
(b)Dogs seek me out as well; I presume I have strange pheremone activity.

Since age 11 I've had a strange habit of waking up at exactly 3:41 a.m. every few days.

I write the Joyce quote "Ineluctable modality of the visible: at least that if no more, thought through my eyes. Signatures of all things I am here to read, seaspawn and seawrack, the nearing tide, that rusty boot" at least five or six times a week. Instead of doodling. I just write it everywhere. I don't know why, and It's not OCDish... more just a mindless thing to scrawl.

When I'm imagining/planning a really tense conversation to be used in a fictional (prose or drama) piece, I will occasionally speak the angriest line of dialogue at the top of my voice, independent of any company/my location. For instance: two months ago, while riding the bus to Santa Monica I said "Fuck off, Mouse-ears!" at the top of my voice.

― remy (x Jeremy), Friday, 30 December 2005 20:24 (twenty years ago)

You are so weird, Remy. ;-)

― jaymc (jaymc), Friday, 30 December 2005 20:25 (twenty years ago)

Those are just the G-rated ones.

― remy (x Jeremy), Friday, 30 December 2005 20:29 (twenty years ago)

WHO TOLD YOU ABOUT MY MOUSE EARS!??
*runs away weeping*

― Thermo Thinwall (Thermo Thinwall), Friday, 30 December 2005 20:30 (twenty years ago)

And Anna, I have a whole passel of siblings and I STILL had a weird in-my-head childhood, so don't fret.

― Laurel (Laurel), Friday, 30 December 2005 20:34 (twenty years ago)

I also get really (really really really) annoyed when in conversation somebody calls a dog "practically human" or "people-like" and think it's actually a grave insult and that this somebody deserves to be bitten.

― remy (x Jeremy), Friday, 30 December 2005 20:39 (twenty years ago)

I...clap along to music while at home by myself.

― [use of street parade as pivotal set piece] (nordicskilla), Friday, 30 December 2005 21:45 (twenty years ago)

Do you clap along to music at home when you are really enjoying it?

― [use of street parade as pivotal set piece] (nordicskilla), Friday, 30 December 2005 21:45 (twenty years ago)

while swaying your head from side to side and stamping your foot like a blind busker?

― kyle (akmonday), Friday, 30 December 2005 21:49 (twenty years ago)

No, actually it's not done right if I'm not sat straight up and very self-consciously clapping as hard as I can in time to the beat. But I'm pretty much static except for my arms.

― [use of street parade as pivotal set piece] (nordicskilla), Friday, 30 December 2005 21:50 (twenty years ago)

So if the BPM Inspector recorded claps instead of taps, you'd be all about it?

― jaymc (jaymc), Friday, 30 December 2005 21:51 (twenty years ago)

i put on a suit and walk down the street at night alone eating ice cream

― kyle (akmonday), Friday, 30 December 2005 21:53 (twenty years ago)

hahahaha!

We should do that together sometime on Shattuck and see what happens!

So if the BPM Inspector recorded claps instead of taps, you'd be all about it?

well, yes!

― [use of street parade as pivotal set piece] (nordicskilla), Friday, 30 December 2005 21:54 (twenty years ago)

Also when I buy new clothes, I hold them up to myself, ask my wife "how do I look?" and put on this stupid blank face while trying to pretend that I am actually wearing the item in question.

― [use of street parade as pivotal set piece] (nordicskilla), Friday, 30 December 2005 21:55 (twenty years ago)

I'm pottering around the house and I remember an embarrassing incident like pleading with an ex-girlfriend to come back to me 15 years ago and suddenly I'm saying out loud "I gotta get my fucking shit together" ore "I don't even need that" or "what you stupid fuck."

― Good Dog (Good Dog), Friday, 30 December 2005 21:56 (twenty years ago)

I like abducting extra-terrestrials.
In my dreams, I run on all fours.

― shieldforyoureyes, Friday, 30 December 2005 21:56 (twenty years ago)

i also pout my lips like Ben Stiller in Zoolander in the mirror before i go out.

― Good Dog (Good Dog), Friday, 30 December 2005 21:57 (twenty years ago)

i close my left eye when I look in the mirror.

― kyle (akmonday), Friday, 30 December 2005 22:02 (twenty years ago)

i am laughing out loud (this is a weird thing that i'm mentioning)

also a lot of times when i climb stairs i count with every step up to 6 and repeat until the stairs are gone

― caitlin oh no (caitxa1), Friday, 30 December 2005 22:09 (twenty years ago)

sometimes I write words
counting up their syllables
and I don't know why

― Haikunym (Haikunym), Friday, 30 December 2005 22:13 (twenty years ago)

when i am bored i think "i should go out and smash the state machine" because i read it in lenin and it won't leave my head

― caitlin oh no (caitxa1), Friday, 30 December 2005 22:18 (twenty years ago)

When I'm watching a subtitled film I always add up the syllables to see if they're divisible by 3. If they're not, I get somewhat agitated and have to make up compound words to get them to fit.

― Matt #2 (Matt #2), Friday, 30 December 2005 22:20 (twenty years ago)

i used to play this game with this guy once, whenever we would go somewhere and there'd be a number like a house number or a route, he'd ask if it was prime and i would say yes or no (and i was right 9/10 times). i am rain man!

― caitlin oh no (caitxa1), Friday, 30 December 2005 22:22 (twenty years ago)

if i am writing something and hit writers block or get tired i will just start typing psycho disturbing things on the screen until i realize what i've done and go delete it rilly quickly.

― Sterling Clover (s_clover), Friday, 30 December 2005 23:30 (twenty years ago)

When I'm imagining typing something I sometimes unconsciously extend my fingers and wiggle them as if at a keyboad. People around me often say 'Everything alright? What are you doing?'

― ratty, Friday, 30 December 2005 23:37 (twenty years ago)

For instance: two months ago, while riding the bus to Santa Monica I said "Fuck off, Mouse-ears!" at the top of my voice.

I heart you Jer =)

I often catch myself smiling when I write smiley/winkey emoticons and frowning when I write frowny ones. Then I realise Im doing it and feel daft.

Also DL, I think I know what you're getting at in yr first post with the "It feels like people are shouting at me" thing. I get that when I get lost in thought and let my thoughts run away with imagined arguments/shouting matches/crazy anger in my mind. Such scenarios pop into my head for no reason sometimes, like I'll imagine having a complete manic screaming hissyfit at a loved one, or stabbing a stranger on the bus. I like to think of it as a release valve.

― Trayce (trayce), Saturday, 31 December 2005 02:46 (twenty years ago)

I do this all the time. Sometimes I gasp or bite my tongue or dig my nails into my hand or something instead of talking though.

― Maria (Maria), Saturday, 31 December 2005 03:09 (twenty years ago)

yep i do this too. i have to consciously talk myself out of a feeling of unbearable embarrassment, to sort of convince myself that the other people who witnessed or participated in these transgressions very likely don't remember anything about them.

― gem (trisk), Saturday, 31 December 2005 03:23 (twenty years ago)

I've started talking to our pets all the time -- not babytalkish like "ooo you're such a cute puppy, yes you are, yes!" But more or less straight conversation. "Are you hungry? You want to go in, or is it warm enough out here?"

"Meow"
"I have no idea. Ask her when she wakes up."
"Meow"
"Usually about 10:30."

― truck-patch pixel farmer (Rock Hardy), Saturday, 31 December 2005 03:35 (twenty years ago)

-me too! I read an essay by James Thurber (written in the thirties or forties I think) where he mentioned this, saying that he sometimes found himself saying random things out loud to drown out the recollection of his embarrassments. It made me feel much less of a mentalist.

― Conor (Conor), Saturday, 31 December 2005 05:02 (twenty years ago)

haha! I do that too! I'll be lying asleep at night and all of a sudden I'll be like "FUCKING SHITASS BITCH FUCK GEGWERWEHEWRHWR" and my problem will be shelved away.

― Curt1s St3ph3ns, Saturday, 31 December 2005 05:10 (twenty years ago)

Haha, i so do this. Normally it's about something I did years and years ago and have little consequence anymore. But still I will utter out loud "Oh Charlie, you stupid idiot!".

― Wogan Lenin (dog latin), Saturday, 31 December 2005 19:17 (twenty years ago)

i was reading this thread yesterday, thinking, i used to do that, blurting things out while alone. but it didn't seem like i really did that anymore.

then later that day i sat up and caught myself saying 'daft punk is playing at my house, at my house.'

so i guess i do.

― Juulia (julesbdules), Saturday, 31 December 2005 19:25 (twenty years ago)

when i run up the stairs i have a habit of yelling out loud "1, 2, 3, 4!"

― latebloomer (latebloomer), Saturday, 31 December 2005 19:30 (twenty years ago)

I have kept a running total in my head of how many stairs I have stepped. I count some more every time I am on stairs. The count is vastly inaccurate due to forgetfulness, drunkenness, being distracted. But, still, I am sure I am going to get it pretty close to right. I refuse to tell anyone what the number is. I have no idea why I do this other than I started compulsively counting the number of stairs when I ran up escalators as a child, because I was afraid of escalators.

― Allyzay must fight Zolton herself. (allyzay), Saturday, 31 December 2005 19:44 (twenty years ago)

I'm not entirely sure it's the same thing. I'm not actually imagining scenarios, nor am I thinking about arguing with people. It's more that my inner thoughts have been invaded by someone who sounds really unimpressed. Like as if they're trying their hardest to be sarcastic.

― Wogan Lenin (dog latin), Saturday, 31 December 2005 19:56 (twenty years ago)

Add me to the list of those who curse themselve while pottering. Or while driving. All sorts of tourettic blortings occur behind the wheel. And superhero fantasies. I had a very detailed one where I was a giant and I uprooted an obnoxious neighbor's house then smoothed the ground over, replanted trees, made it look like the house had never been there. Then the neighbor would come back and ask where his house was, and I'd say "what house?" I would have this same fantasy over and over.
Oh, and when I empty the change out of my pockets at night I say to myself "each quarter is a million dollars, then I see how many millions of dollars I have. I play computer solitaire like that, too. Each card flipped up onto the aces is a million dollars. Sometime I imagine I'm amassing all this money for someone else, and I catch myself thinking "well, my fantasies are so altruistic, someone is sure to give me millions of dollars. Karma."
I could go on. I'm almost fifty fucking years old. I will NEVER get a grip.

― Beth Parker (Beth Parker), Saturday, 31 December 2005 20:11 (twenty years ago)

I guess the self chastising oneself out loud for being stupid or when remembering really embarrassing things we have done in the past (even long ago past) thing is common, or at least it seems common here on this thread. I do it too and then look around guiltily to see if anyone noticed I just said something out loud. Another common theme I read here is counting things, like stairs. I do it also. Have since I was a kid; when I would get really bored waiting for mom or something I would find things to count - like floor or ceiling tiles. Still do this upon occasion when in a public restroom. Talk baby talk to the cat all the time,and even have the S/O doing it now too! WEIRDOs unite! Grin.

― Wiggy (Wiggy), Saturday, 31 December 2005 21:16 (twenty years ago)

I'm almost fifty fucking years old. I will NEVER get a grip.

top girl!

the last time i mentioned something weird that happened to me they gave me meds and sent me away for a short 'rest'. that'll learn me.

― smile when, Saturday, 31 December 2005 21:35 (twenty years ago)

You just told the wrong person. You can tell us.

― Beth Parker (Beth Parker), Saturday, 31 December 2005 22:32 (twenty years ago)

well... remember the cartoon secret inlay in Kid A lol...

― smile when, Saturday, 31 December 2005 22:56 (twenty years ago)

i have this whole thing,
when walking, with symmetry
and stepping on lines

also my clothing
has mystic significance
but only to me

― Haikunym (Haikunym), Saturday, 31 December 2005 23:01 (twenty years ago)

awesome

― smile when, Saturday, 31 December 2005 23:08 (twenty years ago)

Sometimes when I'm in the pub with my friends, or at a party, or round my parents house, I imagine the current conversation turning nasty, and everyone's faces kind of change shape slightly as if in a cartoon, and the lighting takes on an ominous tone, like just before an eclipse, and suddenly the most mild-mannered of my friends or relatives strikes out at another one and says or does something really cruel and vicious that starts a fight and the whole evening degenerates into a horrible free-for-all.
Then I blink or shake myself and it's gone, having only been there for a second. I am sure there is some deep-seated psychological reason for this, but hey-ho.

― accentmonkey (accentmonkey), Sunday, 1 January 2006 11:13 (twenty years ago)

this entire thread, it
endears all of you to me!
yeah seriously though.

― jaymc (jaymc), Sunday, 1 January 2006 12:27 (twenty years ago)

I often get the same thing as Haikunym about not stepping on lines while walking.

Sometimes, like in class or in the bus, just about anywhere actually, I have this terrible urge to eat raw meat with my bare hands and just rip it up. I get this blank stare and I just imagine myself tearing the meat apart with my teeth and hands, in a wild manner.

Everytime I enter a room I've never been in, I see this ball bouncing around, bumping from wall to wall and I try to make it bounce in such a way that it hits all the corners of the room.

― Jibé (Jibé), Sunday, 1 January 2006 13:14 (twenty years ago)

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