Air Freshener C/D S/D etc

Message Bookmarked

Bookmark Removed

What's worse, the smell of a good honest shite, or an overpowering stink of Haze, which your nose subconciously searches under for the original smell?

The most effective freshener of air I've tried is Oust, but I still prefer to let the room clear naturally.

The toilets in the work have cans of Haze 'Professional' (is there a Haza Amateur?) so the sickly magnolia scent alerts you immediately to the fact that the pan may be warm and a bad smell may remain.

Does striking a match really work?

― Rumpie (lil drummer girl parumpumpumpu), Monday, 30 January 2006 12:19 (twenty years ago)

all a big fucking foul smelling dud.

― Ed (dali), Monday, 30 January 2006 12:38 (twenty years ago)

Striking a match does work – although then you get the smell of burnt phosphorus or whatever it is.

Chemical-type sprays are awful in every way. I suspect that now they can't destroy the atmosphere with CFCs they've found something else noxious to replace them with.

Opening a window works for me.

― beanz (beanz), Monday, 30 January 2006 12:41 (twenty years ago)

I find polishing, brewing coffee or baking a cake does it all just as well. Esp. banana cake.

― Johnny B Was Quizzical (Johnney B), Monday, 30 January 2006 12:45 (twenty years ago)

My little toilet at home has no window, and the extractor has been painted closed.

However, home toilet smells are easier to deal with than the smell of strangers.

― Rumpie (lil drummer girl parumpumpumpu), Monday, 30 January 2006 13:10 (twenty years ago)

baking a cake after every poo seems excessive, or just an excuse?

an open window is the best option

i still have my 'grandmas cookies' air freshner i got from the states last month, it's the best!

― Ste (Fuzzy), Monday, 30 January 2006 13:18 (twenty years ago)

The only good use of potpourri is as an awesome Jeopardy category.

― Abbott (Abbott), Monday, 30 January 2006 22:09 (twenty years ago)

i must be going blind because i read this as "Ari Fleischer C/D S/D etc"

― dancing chicken (Jody Beth Rosen), Monday, 30 January 2006 22:29 (twenty years ago)

Side note: burning a match works so well in part because the smelly compounds in shite are sulpherous and the burnt matchhead contains sulpher, also. This allows the match smoke to override the shite smell, by being similar, but more acceptable.

BTW, air freshener is a massive dud.

― Aimless (Aimless), Monday, 30 January 2006 22:56 (twenty years ago)

Especially the ones you have to plug into an outlet.

― Pleasant Plains /// (Pleasant Plains ///), Monday, 30 January 2006 23:07 (twenty years ago)

Just a bit of Lysol spray is enough after a fragrant shit.

― truck-patch pixel farmer (my crop froze in the field) (Rock Hardy), Monday, 30 January 2006 23:13 (twenty years ago)

http://www.lasvegassun.com/dossier/events/gulfwar/eyes7-8.gif http://www.lasvegassun.com/dossier/events/gulfwar/soldier15-16.gif http://www.lasvegassun.com/dossier/events/gulfwar/florafauna25-26.gif

http://www.lasvegassun.com/dossier/events/gulfwar/atropineshot21-22.gif

― TOMBOT, Monday, 30 January 2006 23:15 (twenty years ago)

Shit smells. Air freshener smells. Shit, however, is a necessary byproduct of life, unlike air fresheners. Having said that, we have some scented candles that we light for parties. 'Cucumber' is one of my favorites.

― M. White (Miguelito), Monday, 30 January 2006 23:17 (twenty years ago)

I would bet air fresheners not linked to cancer causing compounds = paid for the tests themselves. only time will tell yes.

http://householdproducts.nlm.nih.gov/
What's under your kitchen sink, in your garage, in your bathroom, and on the shelves in your laundry room? Learn more about what's in these products, about potential health effects, and about safety and handling.

http://leas.ca/Toxins-in-Household-Products.htm
Toxins in Household Products

Air Fresheners
Commercial air fresheners work by masking smells and coating the nasal passages with chemicals which diminish the sense of smell by deadening the nerves. Avoid these products. Instead, try the all-natural air purifiers — house plants. Or try these natural recipes to diminish odour and add a fragrant smell to your house:

* Use baking soda in your garbage or refrigerator to help reduce odours at their source.
* Dissolve 1 tsp (5 ml) of baking soda in 2 cups (500 ml) of hot water, add 1 tsp (5 ml) lemon juice. Pour the solution into a spray bottle and spray as you would an air freshener.
* Place a few slices of a citrus fruit, cloves or cinnamon in a pot with enough water to simmer gently for an hour or two.

http://www.ewg.org/reports/bodyburden2/execsumm.php
Body Burden — The Pollution in Newborns

― no orz, Monday, 30 January 2006 23:23 (twenty years ago)

Our bathroom being off of the kitchen necessitates both match and spray. Just use the earth-friendly blah blah blah citrus types. Way more expensive, but they smell okay.

― Beth Parker (Beth Parker), Monday, 30 January 2006 23:26 (twenty years ago)

'Cause a shitsmell wafting through when you're cooking is bad feng shui. Really.

― Beth Parker (Beth Parker), Monday, 30 January 2006 23:30 (twenty years ago)

Especially the ones you have to plug into an outlet.

-- Pleasant Plains /// (pleasant.plain...), January 31st, 2006 10:07 AM. (later)

Agreed. However, the toilet where I live (ie, a room separate to where the bath, shower, and sink; which has a window and a fan (extractor)) has neither extractor nor a vent/window of any sort. It does inexplicably have an power outlet though.

What the fuck?

― Sasha (sgh), Tuesday, 31 January 2006 01:41 (twenty years ago)

Its so you can post to ILX while you're on the bog. DUH.

― Trayce (trayce), Tuesday, 31 January 2006 02:31 (twenty years ago)

Im so glad to read this thread btw, I thought I was the only one who loathed air freshener! (I equally loathe 99% of deodorants and aftershaves too but thats an aside). My loo-room has those diagonal slat panels that cant be moved or closed - so my loo window is permanently open and the room never smells. Rather handy, except when it rains and you find yrself sat on a rainy wet loo seat.

― Trayce (trayce), Tuesday, 31 January 2006 02:32 (twenty years ago)

I love air freshener! Love it love it love it! I've got a Tropical Mist® Glade® PlugIn® in my apartment right now!

But if you amp it up to unholy levels, expecting it to do the job of deodorizing that only good ventilation and a thorough cleaning can do, well, you're polluting your air and you really should just fuck off. Just like with cologne or perfume, it works best when you can just barely sense it, if at all.

― Michael Daddino (epicharmus), Tuesday, 31 January 2006 03:34 (twenty years ago)

Air fresheners that plug into the mains WTF? How much must you stink to need your air freshener powered by the National Grid?

The smell of the crap always gets through, I find, so your brain ends up mentally associating the smell of peachblossom Haze with the smell of fresh excrement, even when the latter is not in evidence.

All artificial fragrances are bad. We've got a newborn baby, so there's a lot of poo about. Her backside gets cleaned with a scented wipe, the dirty nappy goes into a scented plastic bag, which then goes into a scented bin usw. They all smell like rancid milk shit to me.

Air freshenerd in cars - total dud. Nothing worse than the drunken journey home in the lurching, overheated minicab, suffocating in the fug of a Malibu Magic Tree.

― bham, Tuesday, 31 January 2006 10:19 (twenty years ago)

Rumpie threads should have their own catagory.

― howell huser (chaki), Tuesday, 31 January 2006 10:30 (twenty years ago)

Yeah yeah, tell it to the mods.

(I like the vanilla magic tree)

― Rumpsy Pumpsy (Rumpie), Tuesday, 31 January 2006 10:31 (twenty years ago)

I looked at this thread despite being warned

stupid

― RJG (RJG), Tuesday, 31 January 2006 10:35 (twenty years ago)

I see nothing wrong with this thread... I was wondering whether air fresheners in toilets are a middle-class phenomenon, I'd never even seen one until I got a job where they had those. In my family shit smell wasn't a taboo, sometimes my mom even used to keep the toilet door open while she was sitting there.

― Tuomas (Tuomas), Tuesday, 31 January 2006 10:45 (twenty years ago)

BEWARE - there's a Rumpie thread! And it's SHOCKING. Better keek at it from behind the couch!

― Rumpsy Pumpsy (Rumpie), Tuesday, 31 January 2006 10:48 (twenty years ago)

And it's about AIR FRESHENERS! And POOP! That's sick!

― Tuomas (Tuomas), Tuesday, 31 January 2006 10:49 (twenty years ago)

I only read these threads for RJG's comments.

― Sororah T Massacre (blueski), Tuesday, 31 January 2006 10:50 (twenty years ago)

I only post them for same.

― Rumpsy Pumpsy (Rumpie), Tuesday, 31 January 2006 10:52 (twenty years ago)

i only look at these threads to read stevem's commentary on rjg.

― The Man Without Shadow (Enrique), Tuesday, 31 January 2006 10:52 (twenty years ago)

I only wanna be with you... OOH OOOH OOH!

― Tuomas (Tuomas), Tuesday, 31 January 2006 10:56 (twenty years ago)

i remember reading this piece http://books.guardian.co.uk/departments/scienceandnature/story/0,,545073,00.html
when it came out and it is still totally otm.

― emsk ( emsk), Tuesday, 31 January 2006 11:02 (twenty years ago)

Mods please name Rumper catagory: ROOPIE!//POOPIN! VAGINA! E-PINIONS!!

― howell huser (chaki), Tuesday, 31 January 2006 11:09 (twenty years ago)

That article that Emsk links to is very, very interesting.

As this thread could have been...

― The Late Fear And The Potato Fear (kate), Tuesday, 31 January 2006 11:16 (twenty years ago)

Urgh @ poo smell.

The outside toilet was maybe not that bad an idea, all things considered.

― Pashmina (Pashmina), Tuesday, 31 January 2006 11:17 (twenty years ago)

VAGINA?

― Rumpsy Pumpsy (Rumpie), Tuesday, 31 January 2006 11:19 (twenty years ago)

pooping out of it

― howell huser (chaki), Tuesday, 31 January 2006 11:20 (twenty years ago)

but even more urgh @ poosmell + air freshenersmell, when all the little poosmell molecules have attached themselves to little sickly sweet chemically scented molecules and you end up with this overpowering stomach-churning stench that lingers far, far longer and is more pervasive and unpleasant than a poosmell on its own would be.

― emsk ( emsk), Tuesday, 31 January 2006 11:21 (twenty years ago)

In my family shit smell wasn't a taboo, sometimes my mom even used to keep the toilet door open while she was sitting there.

Tuomas, Tuomas, Tuomas, Tuomas....

There's this guy I work with, kind of a slow guy. Reminds us all of Lenny from Of Mice and Men. Lives up in the sticks with his parents even though he's 35. Anyway, one day we're all sitting around the office, half a dozen dudes, talking about whatever. Someone talks about taking a shit and how he hates sitting there for twenty minutes only to have a peanut fall out. Gross topic, but it's just dudes on a Friday afternoon, right? Basically re-telling that Eddie Murphy routine.

But the slow guy, "Lennie", chimes in to the rest of us with "Know what I really hate? Don't you hate it when you have to shit while you're eating supper, so you have to carry your plate in with you and eat it while on the commode?"

Needless to say, everyone just exploded into laughter while Big Boy sat there heh-hehing along confusingly while looking around at all of us. One of the managers had to take him out into the hall and make sure that he would never tell that story again to anyone.

The only thing with Lennie was, HE WASN'T MAKING THESE POSTS ON THE INTERNET!

― Pleasant Plains /// (Pleasant Plains ///), Tuesday, 31 January 2006 15:15 (twenty years ago)

Don't keek behind the couch Rumpie, you'll never get the smell out.

― Onimo (GerryNemo), Tuesday, 31 January 2006 15:23 (twenty years ago)

Oh god, I rarely if ever use'em. We had some guests who used some spray can after they went for a *poop*. I think it smelled worse than their excrement. Completely dud, I tell ya, unless you want cancer.

― Nathalie (stevie nixed), Tuesday, 31 January 2006 15:25 (twenty years ago)

x-post Onimo

Ha!

― Rumpie (lil drummer girl parumpumpumpu), Tuesday, 31 January 2006 15:26 (twenty years ago)

They need to invent a special molten-plastic suppository that would result in hermetically sealed turds. A shrink-wrap pre-shit suppository.
Maybe the toilet seat could insert it. After all, they make those butt-washer toilets and those automatic flusher toilets. Why not a suppository-inserting toilet? Ladies would have to press an override button if they were just peeing.

― Beth Parker (Beth Parker), Tuesday, 31 January 2006 16:27 (twenty years ago)

Make sure the plastic smells of barbecue, freshly cut grass and margaritas.

― M. White (Miguelito), Tuesday, 31 January 2006 17:17 (twenty years ago)

We're going to be RICH!
And then we won't even need our own product, because you know what they say about rich peoples' shit.

― Beth Parker (Beth Parker), Tuesday, 31 January 2006 22:14 (twenty years ago)

http://www.diarizing.com/wp-content/shit.jpg

― Eisbär (llamasfur), Tuesday, 31 January 2006 22:29 (twenty years ago)

Perfectly formed. Yours?

― Beth Parker (Beth Parker), Wednesday, 1 February 2006 00:08 (twenty years ago)

OK, based on the hilariously stupid cranky reactions over on the LOL thread, I'd just like to ask those of you who got upset at this threads contents 2 things:

1. If not about covering pooey smells, WHAT THE HELL DID YOU THINK THIS THREAD WAS ABOUT? The hell, do you use air freshener to cover up the smell of the TV or something?

2. Its a thread about air freshener, and you are all clicking on it and then demanding a refund. Christ talk about get one life.

― Trayce (trayce), Wednesday, 1 February 2006 01:53 (twenty years ago)

now i want to post a pic of the girl who always wanders around backstage at glastonbury dressed as a turd but googling only brings me um other things. guys she does this every year! oh, perhaps it's a different girl - i'm not really looking at her face, just thinking "wtf you are dressed as a giant turd."

― emsk ( emsk), Wednesday, 1 February 2006 02:36 (twenty years ago)

http://worldofstuart.excellentcontent.com/turd.jpg

― Onimo (GerryNemo), Wednesday, 1 February 2006 12:46 (twenty years ago)

It's amazing to me that so many of the same people who are all "WTF? Get over it!" with regard to dwelling on trauma like bullying have been so UTTERLY TRAUMATISED by mistakenly clicking on a thread that happened to be about shit.

Like bullying is just some force of nature that you can't stop, while SHIT is something weird and unnatural and NEVER TO BE DISCUSSED.

...and what about Dutch toilets, huh? I found the poop shelf quite intriguing.

― The Late Fear And The Potato Fear (kate), Wednesday, 1 February 2006 12:49 (twenty years ago)

OH, and BTW, that's a great costume.

― The Late Fear And The Potato Fear (kate), Wednesday, 1 February 2006 12:50 (twenty years ago)

"UTTERLY TRAUMATISED" is over-egging the pudding a wee bit. Then again it's ILX, we've never had an under-egged pudding.

Poop shelf? I'm not sure I really want to know, but poop shelf?

― Onimo (GerryNemo), Wednesday, 1 February 2006 12:53 (twenty years ago)

Yes, poop shelf. Dutch toilets have this little shelf which can have no conceivable other reason to exist except for the examination of your poop. I mean, that seems to be going overboard a bit, but poop is (sorry, You Are What You Eat) often a good indicator of your general digestive health.

― The Late Fear And The Potato Fear (kate), Wednesday, 1 February 2006 12:56 (twenty years ago)

Yeah they have those in Germany too. When we went there a few years ago I was freaked out - wtf, they've fitted the toilet bowl back to front! Better than the hole-in-the-ground w/2 footplates style bogs we had in cyprus, though.

― Pashmina (Pashmina), Wednesday, 1 February 2006 13:03 (twenty years ago)

Ugh, yeah, that reminds me of the French Campsite style bogs which traumatised me so as a child. I always thought I'd fall in!

― The Late Fear And The Potato Fear (kate), Wednesday, 1 February 2006 13:04 (twenty years ago)

my poo smell I can deal with. cat poo, that's a different story. She's deadly.

for those moments we have a plethora of Yankee Candles, who have a unfailing ability to perfectly replicate any smell. Including saliva-inducing chocolate chip cookie and some amazing apple scents like mcintosh and granny smith.

― zaxxon25 (zaxxon25), Wednesday, 1 February 2006 13:07 (twenty years ago)

I love scented candles. I must admit that I am totally addicted to them, because not only do they smell nice/mask ugly odours, but also you get to CandleGarden (this is the best word ever, invented by Anna the other night) and play with the wax.

― The Late Fear And The Potato Fear (kate), Wednesday, 1 February 2006 13:10 (twenty years ago)

I had a cat once whose shit would trigger the smoke detector. We had to move the litter box.

― Beth Parker (Beth Parker), Wednesday, 1 February 2006 14:43 (twenty years ago)

yeah i thought it were german toilets that has the poop shelf.

german toilets dutch oven.

also air freshener can also be used to mask stench of booze post-party. it's not always poo.

― ken c (ken c), Wednesday, 1 February 2006 14:48 (twenty years ago)

or old socks

― ken c (ken c), Wednesday, 1 February 2006 14:50 (twenty years ago)

or the stench when you whack one off in the morning just before work but then didn't have time to wash your bits before you leave.

― ken c (ken c), Wednesday, 1 February 2006 14:52 (twenty years ago)

it's pretty versatile and therefore is a classic.

― ken c (ken c), Wednesday, 1 February 2006 14:53 (twenty years ago)

scented candles are great, because they look nice as well.

(sorry about the word 'nice' i really tried other words but nothing else was working)

― Ste (Fuzzy), Wednesday, 1 February 2006 14:59 (twenty years ago)

the stench when you whack one off in the morning

wtf, do you use Limburger cheese for lube?

― truck-patch pixel farmer (my crop froze in the field) (Rock Hardy), Wednesday, 1 February 2006 15:04 (twenty years ago)

The really weird toilets are the Clivus Multrum composting toilets, where everything—shit, tampons, puke, even chicken bones and other dinner scraps, all disappears down a black hole. No visuals. Just a cool breeze on your butt. You could have a major tapeworm infestation and you'd never know. Then there's the compost drawer in the basement, and also a faucet for homebrew manure tea. I don't think they recommend using it on food crops, but it's fine for flower beds.

― Beth Parker (Beth Parker), Wednesday, 1 February 2006 15:18 (twenty years ago)

I guess I should have revived one of Ned's toilet threads for that. Straying from the charter.

― Beth Parker (Beth Parker), Wednesday, 1 February 2006 15:19 (twenty years ago)

You must be logged in to post. Please either login here, or if you are not registered, you may register here.