Can someone tell me what's going on in the "Threads You Just Can't Bring Yourself To Open" thread?

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I can't bring myself to open it.

― The Android Cat (Dan Perry), Monday, 30 October 2006 21:39 (nineteen years ago)

(I resisted creating this thread for 7 hours and 40 minutes.)

― The Android Cat (Dan Perry), Monday, 30 October 2006 21:40 (nineteen years ago)

hahaha

― RoxyMuzak© (roxymuzak), Monday, 30 October 2006 21:46 (nineteen years ago)

I see what you've done there.

― accentmonkey (accentmonkey), Monday, 30 October 2006 21:52 (nineteen years ago)

Dan, where is Bemidji?

― Allyzay Eisenschefter (allyzay), Monday, 30 October 2006 21:53 (nineteen years ago)

3. Dead Hookers.

― John Justen will insert a ship in your cat for no additional fee (johnjusten), Monday, 30 October 2006 21:54 (nineteen years ago)

ally, you don't want to go to bemidji

― ken noizewater (Pareene), Monday, 30 October 2006 21:56 (nineteen years ago)

YOU REALLY DON'T

Bemidji is right across the way from Satan's asshole.

― The Android Cat (Dan Perry), Monday, 30 October 2006 21:57 (nineteen years ago)

But there's curling.

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Monday, 30 October 2006 21:58 (nineteen years ago)

I didn't say I wanted to go there, I asked where it was. They are highly different questions.

― Allyzay Eisenschefter (allyzay), Monday, 30 October 2006 21:59 (nineteen years ago)

BUT BUT BUT:

http://images.world66.com/pa/ul/bu/paulbunyanbabe_galleryfull

― John Justen will insert a ship in your cat for no additional fee (johnjusten), Monday, 30 October 2006 22:00 (nineteen years ago)

whoa is that in Satan's Asshole??

― Allyzay Eisenschefter (allyzay), Monday, 30 October 2006 22:00 (nineteen years ago)

http://pix.epodunk.com/locatorMaps/mn/MN_20850.gif

― John Justen will insert a ship in your cat for no additional fee (johnjusten), Monday, 30 October 2006 22:01 (nineteen years ago)

I don't think Paul Bunyan could come from anywhere BUT Satan's asshole.

Bemidji is in the vicinity of the German camp I went to in high school. GO WALDSEE GO

― The Android Cat (Dan Perry), Monday, 30 October 2006 22:03 (nineteen years ago)

lol @ "German camp"

― Allyzay Eisenschefter (allyzay), Monday, 30 October 2006 22:04 (nineteen years ago)

ALSO:
http://community.iexplore.com/photos/journal_photos/pbland4.jpg

― John Justen will insert a ship in your cat for no additional fee (johnjusten), Monday, 30 October 2006 22:05 (nineteen years ago)

O'SO NERDIE

― The Android Cat (Dan Perry), Monday, 30 October 2006 22:06 (nineteen years ago)

I don't know why I've opened any threads besides this one today. Besides Dan not creating it until 7 hours into the day. KUDOS.

― Allyzay Eisenschefter (allyzay), Monday, 30 October 2006 22:06 (nineteen years ago)

wtf is going on in that image at the top of that webpage???

― Allyzay Eisenschefter (allyzay), Monday, 30 October 2006 22:07 (nineteen years ago)

Something TERRIBLE...

― The Android Cat (Dan Perry), Monday, 30 October 2006 22:08 (nineteen years ago)

http://clvweb.cord.edu/german/bemidji1/images/Waldsee-012.jpg

― John Justen will insert a ship in your cat for no additional fee (johnjusten), Monday, 30 October 2006 22:09 (nineteen years ago)

no. Terrible is the Reese Witherspoon thread revival. That in that picture is...dorky.

― Allyzay Eisenschefter (allyzay), Monday, 30 October 2006 22:09 (nineteen years ago)

German = terrible + dorky

― joggin' with the devil (kenan), Monday, 30 October 2006 22:10 (nineteen years ago)

wtf is going on in that image at the top of that webpage???

"Mit Auslander vee make wunderbar wurst!!"

― M. White (Miguelito), Monday, 30 October 2006 22:10 (nineteen years ago)

http://clvweb.cord.edu/prweb/german/images/header.jpg

the kid right off to the right, wearing what appears to be a gold and red crown or something, FUCK that guy.

― Allyzay Eisenschefter (allyzay), Monday, 30 October 2006 22:12 (nineteen years ago)

also nice pixel rendering on the furthest right dude, I sure wish the internet websites that feature ME made me look like Bryan Adams face.

― Allyzay Eisenschefter (allyzay), Monday, 30 October 2006 22:12 (nineteen years ago)

Dan, you shouldn't have ever went to a place like this.

― Allyzay Eisenschefter (allyzay), Monday, 30 October 2006 22:12 (nineteen years ago)

Going to that place let me take senior year German my sophomore year! Also I met a lot of angsty post-punk/straight-edgers from across the nation there (one of whom actually ended up being the year behind me in college, ha).

― The Android Cat (Dan Perry), Monday, 30 October 2006 22:15 (nineteen years ago)

You aren't selling me at all on this place, you know that though right?

― Allyzay Eisenschefter (allyzay), Monday, 30 October 2006 22:16 (nineteen years ago)

when I have kids, I'm gonna send 'em to cookie camp. LEARN HOW TO BAKE AND BE USEFUL TO MOMMY.

― Allyzay Eisenschefter (allyzay), Monday, 30 October 2006 22:16 (nineteen years ago)

Dan did you have to give girls/effeminate boys piggyback rides as well?

― polar bear flashback episode (nickalicious), Monday, 30 October 2006 22:18 (nineteen years ago)

when I have kids, I'm gonna send 'em to cookie camp. LEARN HOW TO BAKE AND BE USEFUL TO MOMMY.

SLAVEDRIVER

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Monday, 30 October 2006 22:19 (nineteen years ago)

Besides they'll eat all the chocolate chips straight up. Your grand plan will fail.

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Monday, 30 October 2006 22:19 (nineteen years ago)

I know. I am revelling in nostalgia.

Oh, except for the dude who claimed to be able to play the piano but only knew "Piano Man" and played it three times a day every day for four straight weeks. Fuck that guy.

But the did get like the best bread ever made by man delivered up there. And my group got kitchen duty on the day when we were celebrating the Dadist movement, so we made a gigantic furniture pyramid, sprinkled the silverware around the dining hall, told everyone there was no food while holding plates of food, then left and ate outside. That was awesome.

xpost: That would be a big FUCK NO to the piggyback rides. We did have kickass dances, though.

― The Android Cat (Dan Perry), Monday, 30 October 2006 22:19 (nineteen years ago)

BTW, Ally, it's clearly your day over at Idolator.

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Monday, 30 October 2006 22:20 (nineteen years ago)

dances that involved piggyback rides.

― Allyzay Eisenschefter (allyzay), Monday, 30 October 2006 22:21 (nineteen years ago)

Oh, except for the dude who claimed to be able to play the piano but only knew "Piano Man" and played it three times a day every day for four straight weeks. Fuck that guy.

His name was Billicio del Joelio.

― polar bear flashback episode (nickalicious), Monday, 30 October 2006 22:21 (nineteen years ago)

best part of Wot video: the revelation that Capn Sensible brushes his teeth with beer.

― Allyzay Eisenschefter (allyzay), Monday, 30 October 2006 22:21 (nineteen years ago)

Further Captain

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Monday, 30 October 2006 22:23 (nineteen years ago)

NO FUCKING PIGGY BACK RIDES (except for the cute girl I was totally crushing on with whom I bonded over a love of Shriekback, SQUEE!)

Contrary to that banner picture, I don't remember any terrified Asian/Hispanic kids while I was there.

― The Android Cat (Dan Perry), Monday, 30 October 2006 22:23 (nineteen years ago)

The Captain loves his cereal.

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Monday, 30 October 2006 22:23 (nineteen years ago)

― The Android Cat (Dan Perry), Monday, 30 October 2006 22:27 (nineteen years ago)

http://i99.photobucket.com/albums/l307/nekospook/cookie.jpg

― kingfish prætor (kingfish 2.0), Monday, 30 October 2006 22:30 (nineteen years ago)

why on earth did that ever, EVER happen?

― Allyzay Eisenschefter (allyzay), Monday, 30 October 2006 22:34 (nineteen years ago)

Oh, except for the dude who claimed to be able to play the piano but only knew "Piano Man" and played it three times a day every day for four straight weeks. Fuck that guy.

Fuck that guy? Stone that guy, more like. Even thinking about that makes me want to scream "SHUT UP SHUT UP SHUT UP!" at someone.

― accentmonkey (accentmonkey), Monday, 30 October 2006 23:12 (nineteen years ago)

OH BELIEVE ME, WE DID

― The Android Cat (Dan Perry), Monday, 30 October 2006 23:35 (nineteen years ago)

Did I meet teh Shriekback girl at one point, Dan?

― John Justen will insert a ship in your cat for no additional fee (johnjusten), Monday, 30 October 2006 23:39 (nineteen years ago)

Yes! She came to one of the dances! I was supposed to go to one of her dances but stupid prior commitments got in the way and then I got totally cockblocked by a gangly proto-emo dude that following summer.

― The Android Cat (Dan Perry), Tuesday, 31 October 2006 00:34 (nineteen years ago)

It's good to know that small portions of my long-term memory are still intact.

― John Justen will insert a ship in your cat for no additional fee (johnjusten), Tuesday, 31 October 2006 00:41 (nineteen years ago)

guys, let's discuss: Tony Kornheiser: worst sportscaster ever, or worst sportscaster ever?

― Allyzay Eisenschefter (allyzay), Tuesday, 31 October 2006 02:32 (nineteen years ago)

Skipping 32 messages at this point... Click here if you want to load them all.

I had to give my cat a bath once, cos he was pretty young and he's kind of dumb, he didn't really get taught how to clean himself (or meow or like really behave like a cat at all) because he was a stray baby cat. So anyway he liked to play in the litter box (!!!!!!!!!!!!) and then his feeties got NASTY so I gave him a bath. Shit sucked, I think I bled from every limb that day.

― Allyzay Eisenschefter (allyzay), Tuesday, 31 October 2006 21:54 (nineteen years ago)

Oh dude, ew. I can't imagine growing up thinking it was fun to go toilet-spelunking.

― The Android Cat (Dan Perry), Tuesday, 31 October 2006 21:56 (nineteen years ago)

Wow. I don't even dare to clip my cat's nails. Allyzay, you are lucky to be alive; the death of a thousand cat scratches is probably one of the worst...

― Sara R-C (Sara R-C), Tuesday, 31 October 2006 21:58 (nineteen years ago)

Esp. the death of a thousand cat scratches laced with virulent kitty-poo.

― The Android Cat (Dan Perry), Tuesday, 31 October 2006 21:59 (nineteen years ago)

My little cat's really kind of dumb. Thankfully he figured out how to clean himself after that, though he hasn't stopped spending half hours at a time in the damn litterbox (we discovered he DOESN'T KNOW HOW TO BURY POOP, and I ain't gettin in there to teach him). The cat also appears to be partially deaf and unable to tell WHERE sounds come from so it is completely impossible to stop him from doing that without banging on the top of the box or chasing him out somehow. Shouldn't have named the damn thing after Ben Roethlisberger, I guess.

― Allyzay Eisenschefter (allyzay), Tuesday, 31 October 2006 22:00 (nineteen years ago)

You should have given him a kitty helmet to go with the kitty motorcycle!

http://perso.orange.fr/mike.werner/BlogPics/Cat2.jpg

― The Android Cat (Dan Perry), Tuesday, 31 October 2006 22:03 (nineteen years ago)

Allyzay, it sounds like your cat is the ideological twin of my younger cat; I don't know why, but she doesn't bury her poop either. Aggravating.

One afternoon my friend C0ry and I realized our kids - ages 3 and almost-3 at the time - were being awfully quiet downstairs. Upon investigation, we discovered them playing happily in my cat's litter box, apparently believing it to be some kind of sand box (in the laundry room, which was behind a closed door). We were not pleased. Thankfully, the litter was clean.

― Sara R-C (Sara R-C), Tuesday, 31 October 2006 22:03 (nineteen years ago)

http://davepics.com/Album/1994-1998.Colorado/1996-08.Mr-Peterson/tn/Image-087.med.jpg

Easy Rider II: The Quickening

― The Android Cat (Dan Perry), Tuesday, 31 October 2006 22:04 (nineteen years ago)

At least they were playing in the litterbox and not "Grandma's vitamins" like my cousins did when they were like 3 or 4. Though I dunno, cats can have some nasty diseases in there.

― Allyzay Eisenschefter (allyzay), Tuesday, 31 October 2006 22:12 (nineteen years ago)

When I was 2, my mom caught me eating cat food. Bleaugh.

I also ate Crisco when I was 4 because right up until it hit my tastebuds I was convinced that Crisco = frosting.

― The Android Cat (Dan Perry), Tuesday, 31 October 2006 22:13 (nineteen years ago)

Toxoplasmosis for one (why pregnant women should not change litter boxes). We dragged them out and washed their hands well and everything turned out okay.

"Grandma's vitamins?!" That does not sound good. (Even just a multivitamin often has iron in it, and too much iron is dangerous for little kids).

― Sara R-C (Sara R-C), Tuesday, 31 October 2006 22:14 (nineteen years ago)

I did that with like a huge amount of bacon grease or lard once! My mom had also been making a pan of cinnamon rolls at the time and I assumed which pan was which extremely incorrectly.

xpost My Grandma's "vitamins" would've been more correctly spelled as "valiums"

― Allyzay Eisenschefter (allyzay), Tuesday, 31 October 2006 22:15 (nineteen years ago)

OMG, Valium. Were the kids okay?!

xpost Aaaaargh Crisco. There were these really good brownies that the St. Olaf caf made, but I swear they were frosted with a mixture of Crisco plus sugar. (I always scraped it off). Similarly, the "mint" brownies appeared to have been frosted with Crest toothpaste (again, SCRAPED IT OFF).

Cat food and Crisco. Dan, Dan... what I wonder is if there are even better stories that you aren't telling that we could somehow get out of your mother using bribery.

― Sara R-C (Sara R-C), Tuesday, 31 October 2006 22:17 (nineteen years ago)

"lolz kidz r asleep"

― The Android Cat (Dan Perry), Tuesday, 31 October 2006 22:18 (nineteen years ago)

Yeah, after being brought to the hospital and getting stomach pumps etc etc! It resulted in a years long family drama in which my uncle accused people of trying to kill them, which didn't make any sense!

I HATE the frosting at like 99.9% of bakeries :(

― Allyzay Eisenschefter (allyzay), Tuesday, 31 October 2006 22:18 (nineteen years ago)

We had some cupcakes this weekend with the world's worst frosting on them; they were so sweet, I thought they were actually beginning to mold and ferment.

― The Android Cat (Dan Perry), Tuesday, 31 October 2006 22:21 (nineteen years ago)

I like how this thread is now essentially DC MEETS HASTINGS: TEH CROSSOVER ISSUE

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Tuesday, 31 October 2006 22:22 (nineteen years ago)

haha I ate Crisco because it had pictures of cake and french fries on the package, then I opened it and it was this goo, and I was all like "maybe this is like ESSENCE OF FLAVOR?", you know what, fuck being 6.

― polar bear flashback episode (nickalicious), Tuesday, 31 October 2006 22:22 (nineteen years ago)

xpost Wow - what a scary experience (probably not fun for kids or adults). So you're uncle makes no sense; was he overwrought, crazy, or just paranoid?

Many frostings in bakeries are too sweet and the texture is bad. For good frosting, you have to make your own. Even then, I don't care for the buttercream ones much. (Dark chocolate frosting, though, YUM. I am happy if I have leftovers to put on graham crackers.)

― Sara R-C (Sara R-C), Tuesday, 31 October 2006 22:23 (nineteen years ago)

I like how this thread is now essentially DC MEETS HASTINGS: TEH CROSSOVER ISSUE

Bad frosting crosses all geographic borders, Ned.

― Sara R-C (Sara R-C), Tuesday, 31 October 2006 22:24 (nineteen years ago)

Oh the images.

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Tuesday, 31 October 2006 22:25 (nineteen years ago)

http://www.bubbanfriends.org/pictures/holidays-04/cupcake-santa/frosting-face.jpg

― The Android Cat (Dan Perry), Tuesday, 31 October 2006 22:31 (nineteen years ago)

I make really good buttercream frosting but yeah, that can make you wanna vomit if you eat, like, more than one cupcake with it.

My uncle was just crazy, btw! Melodramatic, the entire lot of them.

― Allyzay Eisenschefter (allyzay), Tuesday, 31 October 2006 22:32 (nineteen years ago)

I think the buttercream recipes we have are all from The Cake Bible. Anything is better than something that is too sweet; if it's too buttery I start thinking about Homer Simpson eating a pancake with a stick of butter in it. I should just try to divorce thinking from eating; I'd be so much happier.

Argh, Dan, that photo. How am I going to manage to make Xmas cookies with my kids now; you've brought the graphic reality back.

― Sara R-C (Sara R-C), Tuesday, 31 October 2006 22:37 (nineteen years ago)

I thought this was as good a place as any for Threads I Don't Have The Balls To Actually Start:

*TS: Rake Yohn vs Raab Himself

*most infuriating personality traits: yourself edition

*this is the thread where you get all your tedious bitching about work out of the way so you don't have to bore your significant other when you get home, because you know they ain't standing for that shit much longer

*Threads I Don't Have The Balls To Actually Start

― polar bear flashback episode (nickalicious), Tuesday, 31 October 2006 22:37 (nineteen years ago)

I ENDORSE THE CREATION OF THIS THREAD

― Allyzay Eisenschefter (allyzay), Tuesday, 31 October 2006 22:39 (nineteen years ago)

I thought this was as good a place as any for Threads I Don't Have The Balls To Actually Start:

A concept Tuomas refers to as "Starting Threads"

― researching ur life (grady), Wednesday, 1 November 2006 06:01 (nineteen years ago)

lolz

― The Android Cat (Dan Perry), Wednesday, 1 November 2006 21:16 (nineteen years ago)

*TS: Rake Yohn vs Raab Himself

raab, totally.

― Sam rides the beat like a bicycle (Molly Jones), Wednesday, 1 November 2006 21:20 (nineteen years ago)

Okay, someone convince me that KUET radio in Black Canyon Falls, AZ ins't the best radio station in the country.

― The Android Cat (Dan Perry), Wednesday, 1 November 2006 21:24 (nineteen years ago)

playlist? stream?

― Sam rides the beat like a bicycle (Molly Jones), Wednesday, 1 November 2006 21:26 (nineteen years ago)

Dan, you know you miss WLITE.

(If we were in the same room, I'd probably be running away quickly right now).

― Sara R-C (Sara R-C), Wednesday, 1 November 2006 21:28 (nineteen years ago)

Who cares about the playlist, Sam? LOOK AT THE CALL SIGN!

TS: KUET vs KLIT vs WANK

― The Android Cat (Dan Perry), Wednesday, 1 November 2006 21:32 (nineteen years ago)

KUMM!

― The Android Cat (Dan Perry), Wednesday, 1 November 2006 21:33 (nineteen years ago)

KLIT-FM 92.7
"Lite 92.7"
Location: Thousand Oaks
Owner: Amaturo Group

Format: Soft Adult Contemporary

FM Stereo

K-Lite is still light adult contemporary, playing Counting Crows, Bruce Hornsby, to Kelly Clarkson.

― gear (gear), Wednesday, 1 November 2006 21:34 (nineteen years ago)

OMG, I cannot believe there is really a radio station called WOPP. That's just wrong.

― The Android Cat (Dan Perry), Wednesday, 1 November 2006 21:36 (nineteen years ago)

"Soft Adult" combined with the letters KLIT is cracking me up. (How little it takes to entertain my small mind...)

― Sara R-C (Sara R-C), Wednesday, 1 November 2006 21:36 (nineteen years ago)

WAHT-AM 1560

http://static.flickr.com/92/210178853_51c9ddcfb6.jpg

― gear (gear), Wednesday, 1 November 2006 21:37 (nineteen years ago)

KLIT FM was possibly the best part of the trip we took out to LA in college. There's something surreal about seeing big billboards that say "KLIT" all over the place.

There's also a WOGG. O AMERICAPAWS

― The Android Cat (Dan Perry), Wednesday, 1 November 2006 21:38 (nineteen years ago)

more wrong than klit????

― Sam rides the beat like a bicycle (Molly Jones), Wednesday, 1 November 2006 21:38 (nineteen years ago)

There is no KNIG but there is a WIGG.

― The Android Cat (Dan Perry), Wednesday, 1 November 2006 21:38 (nineteen years ago)

more wrong than klit????

THERE IS ABSOLUTELY NOTHING WRONG WITH KLIT

― The Android Cat (Dan Perry), Wednesday, 1 November 2006 21:39 (nineteen years ago)

http://www.kuntradio.org/

― Sam rides the beat like a bicycle (Molly Jones), Wednesday, 1 November 2006 21:48 (nineteen years ago)

roffle

I love radio.

― The Android Cat (Dan Perry), Wednesday, 1 November 2006 21:49 (nineteen years ago)

KOOZ 94.1 FM Radio - Myrtle Point, OR

― gear (gear), Wednesday, 1 November 2006 21:54 (nineteen years ago)

WACK
"1420 Wack Sports Radio"

― The Android Cat (Dan Perry), Wednesday, 1 November 2006 21:56 (nineteen years ago)

KMOD - Tulsa's Rock Station

― Stephen X (Stephen X), Wednesday, 1 November 2006 22:03 (nineteen years ago)

one year passes...

# Judd Apatow versus Wes Anderson [Started by The stickman from the hilarious "xkcd" comics, last updated 53 minutes ago] (I Love Everything) 3 new answers [POLL closes: July 30]

― BIG HOOS aka the steendriver, Tuesday, 29 July 2008 02:07 (seventeen years ago)

wait wrong thread

― BIG HOOS aka the steendriver, Tuesday, 29 July 2008 02:07 (seventeen years ago)

-- John Justen will insert a ship in your cat for no additional fee (johnjusten)

good times, great oldies

― BLACK BEYONCE, Tuesday, 29 July 2008 02:14 (seventeen years ago)

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