Awful twist endings.

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The protagonist wakes up with a dildo up his arse, and realizes the "girlfriend" he'd been abusing for the past weeks was actually himself!

― Tuomas (Tuomas), Thursday, 2 November 2006 05:25 (eighteen years ago) link

You win.

― The Android Cat (Dan Perry), Thursday, 2 November 2006 05:30 (eighteen years ago) link

Tuomas wakes up with a dildo up his arse, and realizes the message board he'd been abusing for the past weeks was actually himself!

― electric sound of jim [and why not] (electricsound), Thursday, 2 November 2006 05:30 (eighteen years ago) link

omg lol

― a name means a lot just by itself (lfam), Thursday, 2 November 2006 05:31 (eighteen years ago) link

God is real.

(They actually used that one.)

― Tuomas (Tuomas), Thursday, 2 November 2006 05:33 (eighteen years ago) link

The protagonist and his enemy came to peace with each other and instead of taking revenge, the enemy simply walked away. Then a bunch of planes came and dropped bombs on him.

(I saw that one today. So depressing.)

― Maria (Maria), Thursday, 2 November 2006 05:37 (eighteen years ago) link

After defeating the alien invasion, the protagonist returns home, only to realize his "wife" is actually a sadistic genetically enhanced mutant alien cow - which is okay, because he is actually a masochistic xenozoophiliac with a taste for bovines.

― Tuomas (Tuomas), Thursday, 2 November 2006 05:44 (eighteen years ago) link

Sorry Tuomas, there's no way you can top your opening post.

― The Android Cat (Dan Perry), Thursday, 2 November 2006 05:56 (eighteen years ago) link

I was the clone

― S- (sgh), Thursday, 2 November 2006 05:59 (eighteen years ago) link

It was me! No, it was her! No, it was him! OMG shes not dead! It was her!

Thank you, Wild Things

― Trayce (trayce), Thursday, 2 November 2006 06:00 (eighteen years ago) link

S/he IS ACTUALLY SATAN!

― Marmot (marmotwolof), Thursday, 2 November 2006 07:36 (eighteen years ago) link

The gay cowboy protagonist meets up with his absent lover first time in six months. He tries to kiss him, but unbeknownst to him the lover has joined a local baptist church that has convinced him homosexuals are evil and should all die. He beats the shit out of the protagonist, goes home and lives happily ever after with his new church friends.

― Tuomas (Tuomas), Thursday, 2 November 2006 07:38 (eighteen years ago) link

Stalker dildo's phone call traced, IT'S CALLING FROM INSIDE YOUR OWN RECTUM!

― slugbuggy (slugbuggy), Thursday, 2 November 2006 08:38 (eighteen years ago) link

He was a ghost all along! So was his girlfriend! So was his dog! So was that spooky little kid! Everyone in the film was a ghost! It was set in Hell!

― chap who would dare to welcome our new stingray masters (chap), Thursday, 2 November 2006 13:19 (eighteen years ago) link

parroty chewomas

― Breean Weldrick (weldrick), Thursday, 2 November 2006 13:28 (eighteen years ago) link

yr brother and wife tricking you into attempting suicide made you feel much better, thanks guys!

― jhoshea megafauna (scoopsnoodle), Thursday, 2 November 2006 14:58 (eighteen years ago) link

The Republicans win again.

― B.L.A.M. (Big Loud Mountain Ape), Thursday, 2 November 2006 15:37 (eighteen years ago) link

four months pass...

SPOILERS!!

― Tuomas, Wednesday, 28 March 2007 07:01 (seventeen years ago) link

SPOILERS!!

I just saw Matchstick Men by Ridley Scott, and my god did it have one of the most awful twist endings ever! Not to mention that it was totally implausible (even beyond the level of Fight Club implausibility - and this was supposed to be a much more realistic film), it effectively undermined a lot of the themes the movie had developed so far. To credit the filmmakers they managed to salvage a lot with the final couple of scenes, but I still wish this movie would've been about what it was seemingly about, since 90% of it was very good.

― Tuomas, Wednesday, 28 March 2007 07:09 (seventeen years ago) link

god is alanis morrisette

― ken c, Wednesday, 28 March 2007 07:12 (seventeen years ago) link

The Machinist is fucking shit.

― Noodle Vague, Wednesday, 28 March 2007 11:18 (seventeen years ago) link

Chubby Checker comes on!

― Mark G, Wednesday, 28 March 2007 11:19 (seventeen years ago) link

Awful twist endings are better in 1950's sci-fi, when some pipe-smoking professorial type character explains it all to the protagonist in simple language.

― Matt #2, Wednesday, 28 March 2007 11:41 (seventeen years ago) link

it was all a set up - he klilld himself to discredit the idea of capital punishment.

― pisces, Wednesday, 28 March 2007 11:55 (seventeen years ago) link

Oh it was just a bunch of actors pretending to be ghosts all along!
Leave that one to Scooby Doo, fuckers.

― Matt #2, Wednesday, 28 March 2007 11:58 (seventeen years ago) link

it was all a set up - he klilld himself to discredit the idea of capital punishment.

Which movie was that from, I can't remember?

― Tuomas, Wednesday, 28 March 2007 12:01 (seventeen years ago) link

"The Life of David Gale"

― Ben Boyerrr, Wednesday, 28 March 2007 12:33 (seventeen years ago) link

psychopath was "just kidding"

― Roberto Spiralli, Wednesday, 28 March 2007 12:42 (seventeen years ago) link

Tuomas, were you talking about Frailty? 'Cause I thought (spoiler!) that was more like "God is real...and a goddamn psycopath."

― Simon H., Wednesday, 28 March 2007 12:59 (seventeen years ago) link

Err, psychopath. I can spell, I promise!

― Simon H., Wednesday, 28 March 2007 13:00 (seventeen years ago) link

Nope, that was Breaking the Waves.

― Tuomas, Wednesday, 28 March 2007 13:01 (seventeen years ago) link

Oh, right!

― Simon H., Wednesday, 28 March 2007 13:03 (seventeen years ago) link

The guy who's been killing everyone was actually the protagonist's BEST FRIEND all along!!

― the next grozart, Wednesday, 28 March 2007 13:06 (seventeen years ago) link

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