What would you choose?

You must be even more bored than me Dave.

Yeah

Need something to keep me sane at work.

What are those wierd things called that you use to eat snails?

If you've got something to keep an edge sharpish, then a spoon could do the job, though you'd be worried about cutting the side of your lip too.

eating noodles might be tricky with a spoon unless you cut them all up first which would take ages, then you would have cold noodles which would be bad.

Unless you broke them up before you cooked them, then you could cook them up and eat them hot with a spoon.

And how Dave were you proposing to eat noodles with your knife eh?

I eat Pot Noodles with a spoon. So the thing to do would be to wash out and keep the pot noodle pots and then put your proper noodles in the pots, since they seem to work with spoon-eating-noodles.

I like your thinking that could work.

I think that the spoon is probably the way to go, any other form of cutlery would mean that you can't eat soup (unless you have it in a mug) or rice pudding, or custard.

A fork is the only way to go. It can do most things.

Forks aren't very good at cutting

Forks, you can rip things with a fork even if you can't cut them properly.

One of those salad catching devices (yes, N, this is another Jelism)

Are we allowed 2 forks? I would choose a dagger.

My dad has a metal spork, it's kind of kite shaped with 2 prongs at the end of the longest edge and allegedly has a sharp cutting side. I sincerely doubt anyone else in the world has one of these (prove me wrong).

I guess Splayds are a 70's thing? I think we still have a dozen of this in our house. Indispensible for snacking, especially on the move.

Got to get me one of those.

I would be the envy of all my friends.

A cake fork, but the size of a regular fork.

I have a metal spork too. It isn't like the one Graham describes. It does, however, rock for serving noodles, and while it is almost certainly designed for serving rather than eating I think it would work quite well.

I'd have to opt for a fork or a spoon of some kind, I hardly ever use a knife when I'm eating at home (well, with nobody watching me, at any rate). When I was a lazy student I had a load of teaspoons in my room and would quite often be too lazy to get proper cutlery from the kitchen for eating instant stuff, so I used a teaspoon to eat cake once, and I don't mean daintily eating a small fairy cake or anything, I mean mangling "slices" off the end of a huge slab of golden syrup cake. Oh, such halcyon days... *weeps into keyboard*

I would have to choose a silver parfait spoon They are quite quaint. :)

Does a swiss army knife count as cutlery? I choose one of those, you even get SCISSORS and a NAIL FILE.

jel, are you talking about a boring old colander or a thrilling multi-purpose salad spinner? cause those things are fucking badass: i've never had shinier lettuce. plus you can toss food up and try to catch it in your mouth which is more difficult with pointier utensils.

people people we need not use utensils - did neolithic man use tools - NO (well kind of - yes) - lets use our hands for eating, loving, holding and bloody fist fights outside kebab shops.

for your info i would use a flexible pairing blade - yes i couldnt eat soup but i would have rose shaped radishes and fancy cut tomatoes.

oooh i might have one of those super sharp knives that cut cans - i wouldnt need to eat as i could enjoy myself cutting cans

i would choose a teaspoon, cos they're little and you can eat baby food with them.