Wimbledon 2002

Day 1:

No upsets, but good to see the first Heroic British Failure of the championships, as Jamie Delgado (the best 13-year-old in the world at one time, I'm led to believe - but not at tennis, surely) squanders four match points vs #22 seed Nicolas Lapentti. Anna K throws a bit of a strop in a BBC interview, and Gary Richardson gets all Partridgean for a second. The Amazing Tiny Rochus Brothers play each other on court 14 and it seems to pass without comment; 5'6" Olivier R's reward is a 2nd round tie vs Brobdingnagian Marat Safin.

Pick of the second round: Taylor Dayne vs Jan-Michael Vincent, Enqvist vs Philippoussis, Tulyaganova vs Rockin' Rubin, Testud vs Pierce (almost out today).

Rejuvenated Krajicek looming in R3 for Agassi?

Nothing new I know but what a dowdy presentation team the BBC is fielding. Sue Barker looks a sight as usual and John Lloyd and Pam Shriver are also a joke with their horrible suits/outfits and conformist opinions. Saying that Gary Richardson's questions to Kournikova were 'reasonable' was absurd. The first question was reasonable - he did claim that she had lost confidence and she rightly said that he couldn't possibly know if that was true but she answered petulantly. From then on he kept asking questions which I'm sure were deliberately provocative as well as patronising and condescending.

I think I *heart* Mark Philippoussis madly and passionately.

I suspect that Richardson has got a bit of a rep amongst the players; I recall Todd Martin (who's supposed to be a nice bloke) giving him a hard time last year. Poor bugger.

Thank God for John McEnroe (and bring back Chris Evert). What would a ITV Wimbledon panel be like? Ion Tiriac and Jeremy Bates?

I am DYING for a television here at work...

Yes to McEnroe (hey, Mike - we had this same conversation on The All- New ILE LAST June!).

I like Shriver, actually: but not the veteran UK ladies. I don't like Inverdale much either.

Richardson kills with kindness. He's a strange one. I think it's all a strategy. But Kournikova did not respond reasonably. She 'earns' enough to answer a few questions.

Has the women's game ever been less open than this year?

I don't think Henman will win. Why break the habit of a decade?

Safin or Henman will win for the men; Venus will win if she doesn't hurt herself (I just don't see Serena beating her on grass).

They should get Gary Richardson's brother James in, he's so bloody under-used doing just Football Italia.

Day 2:

Out goes Federer - a few sloppy shots here and there, but mostly an inspired display by 18-year-old Ancic. A bit of a shame - I know Roger F's destined to win this one day, but a few more days in this year's event would've been nice. He's got the most watchable game on the men's tour. Thanks goodness his female equivalent Justine Henin survived some sticky moments today.

The Brit up against Venus somehow contrived to win a couple of games - she was RUBBISH. She'd have been halfway down the ladder at my old club based on that display.

Aussie Open champ Johansson out 12-10 in the 5th (4 1/2 hr) to some Brazilian chap.

Slightly unpleasant to see B***s B****r in the commentary box today (with son Noah - are his other kids called Forget and Leconte?); of course, he doesn't turn my stomach as much as he did in his playing days, but I'd feel a lot happier if he wasn't in SW19 at all, thank you very much.

What I want to know is why Patty Schnyder can't play on grass. C'mon, Patty; give me something to root for!

Michael's strange hatrid of Boris has me giggling again. Must dig out that article, wherever it is...

Henman should have his best chance ever to win, but still somehow I feel he just....won't. But then, why not?

And strike me as another fan of Shriver's.

What did Richardson say to poor (only in the skill sense) Anna?

Michael's strange hatrid of Boris has me giggling again.

Hatrid? Is that Scotch?

Well, he has that holy-water-to-a-vampire effect on me. He's like a big solid lump of Kryptonite - essence of Liverpool FC. Now, I like Alan Hansen as a TV pundit, but he's not essence of Liverpool FC - he just fell in with a bad lot in the 70s and 80s. I'd prefer Becker as a pundit if none of his actual genetic material was involved. Perhaps they could drape one of his old Fila tops over a chair and Inverdale could interview that? Must dig out that article, wherever it is...

It was in issue zero of the now defunct men's quarterly "Is There Any Point Ever Having Children?". And don't bother - it's rubbish.

Henman should have his best chance ever to win, but still somehow I feel he just....won't. But then, why not?

Because there still remains (as there does every year) one player in the event he just can't beat: this time it happens to be Lleyton Hewitt.

What did Richardson say to poor (only in the skill sense) Anna?

"What's a good-lookin' bird like you doin' moochin' around with a gob like a smacked bum?"

Rochus is doing his David'n'Goliath bit on Centre vs Safin (two sets up) and Sampras is a set and a break down to Bastl on #2. But, of course, we're not seeing any of this on telly 'cos Ormskirk's own Barry Cowan is fumbling his way to defeat vs Lapentti on court #3 and it's clearly more important to show the Brits. Grrr.

Unusually I'm in the position of hoping Hansen, Lineker and co wrap it up quite soon on BBC1...

Sampras is down 2 sets now. Phillopoussis is 2 sets up on Enqvist.

Mike - when Ian Wright's on, the best thing is to wrap it up asap.

I don't mind Becker so much as his stupid child, showing off for the cameras.

Wow - is Sampras going out?

Sampras woke up! It's now tied at two sets apiece with Sampras winning the first game of the fifth set at love. It seems Pete is rediscovering how to play...

...only for Bastl to play one perfect returning game at 4-4 and then serve it out. Last time we'll see Sampras at Wimbledon? Or anywhere? He looked completely fed up sat there at the end.

Safin out to a man 11 inches shorter than him. GOOD.

It's not *that* child, is it?

PJ: the one conceived in a broom cupboard at a restaurant? I don't think so. Though I could sense The Big Useless British Woman Who Lost To Venus shifting uneasily in her seat next to BB on the highlights show - I think the Leimen Lech might've her asked her out for a Chinese.

Meanwhile, everything goes bonkers on Day 3 - Agassi out too, to a big strapping Thai lad. Oon will be pleased. Krajicek survives 11-9 in the 5th vs top Cobi Jones-lookalike James Blake, to be the only former champion left in the event.

Fear the Philippoussis.

He IS a god

*sob* James Blake frustrates me. I really really wanted him to win (or at least get past the second round). Sampras going out wasn't too much of a surprise, but Aggasi's loss was BRUTAL.

On the women's side, let's hear it for Mary Pierce's demolition of Sandrine Testud!

It may be the first time I've seen James Blake play - he seems to be another, like Federer, who's got the lot in one tidy package. Krajicek seemed to be out on his feet, only his 30-odd aces keeping him in the decider.

Dan: what do we know about Jeff Morrison - due to face Ferrero on Centre tomorrow? He plays doubles with the fantastically-named Mardy Fish and he's 23 is all I can come up with.

All I really know about him is that he's more known for doubles success than singles.

I enjoyed listening to Becker and McEnroe sparring yesterday afternoon while they virtually ignored the Rusedski game.

"No pressure, Tim, but if you bottle it this time the Nation will never forgive you" (front page (?) headline in one UK newspaper today - I may have paraphrased a bit)

Leyton Hewitt has won 75% of all his pro games, that's an incredible record, I really can't see Tim beating him.

"Mardy Fish"!

Hewitt, Roddick, Philippoussis (sp?) are the pf's uncontroversial tips. (Agassi and Sampras were NOT. I am sorry to lose AA.)

another seed down, Ferrero out, Morrisson looking bloody useful.

Elena Baltacha (daughter of Sergei? yes?) putting up a fight against Coetzer, possibly the best showing of any of our British girls.

Go Morrison go! That result made me very, very happy (although Ferrero isn't known as a frightening grass player).

Virginia Ruano Pascual has never beaten Venus Williams, has she?

Makes an awful lot of noise does our Elena - can't help feeling it was putting off the lovely Amanda. Still, a British girl in the last 32 is, well, unheard of in all tournaments with more than 32 entrants.

Morrison was great - a touch of Charlie Pasarell, circa '69. I do like these spunky young Americans.

All the flag-waving cretins are on Centre Court, I see - squealing their way through a gripping end to set #3 in Henman-Draper. Timbo's lucky to be ahead. He may yet lose this. Good day to have a ground pass - must be easy to get an unreserved seat on #3 or #18 with all the FOOLS on the HILL.

Henin still not quite firing, her mate Kim out to LIQUORSAVER, former champ Martinez murders Schnyder; favourite name still in women's event: Myriam Casanova.

10th men's seed Canas out 10-8 in the 5th after being two sets up vs sound artist F Lopez. It's those crazy silences Canas can't stand.

I'm just weirded out by John McEnroe's morphing into...Dubya. EEEEEK.

In what sense, Suzy? In that shirt he looks more like Peter Momtchiloff.

I wish the Brits were a bit less eager to please and a bit snottier; they don't have to be full-on obnox, just swagger a little. Elena B already seems to have accepted that she's no chance of beating LIQUORSAVER; I'm sure her Dad didn't show as much respect to Zico or Eder in '82.

apparently there are three women's players at Wimbledon whose Dad's were professional footie players, I can think of two, Jonesy????

Baltacha, Clijsters and...?

Martina Muller? Bit of a guess, that.

Chandra's going well vs Panova... could she upset Serena in the last sixteen?

Baltacha = 1982? Gosh, you're right - I'd been mixing him up with...

KUZNETSOV

According to my mate the G the daughter of Dennis Viollet was one of the English girls who went out in the first round.

The Serena - Callans game is possibly the best women's match I've seen in ages, this unemployment lark may be shit for my wallet but it's excellent for my sports appreciation.

and now Kafelnikov all but out, and yes, he does have a touch of the Teddy Sheringhams about him doesn't he?

Who says there's no strength in depth in the women's game? Well, I do usually - but Callens (ranked 119, qualifier) has just given Serena W one hell of a battle. Callens was a break up in each set, served for the first at 5-3 and was only denied a double-break in the second by a ludicrous Serena lob.

Chris: do you have fancy BBCi digitalismo telly? Can you watch any match you like from five showcourts? Were there any breaks of serve *at all* in the Dent-Arthurs match? Kafelnikov two sets and 0-5 down to Malisse on Centre... blimey.

I'm going to stick my neck out and say it's not Philippoussis' year. No variety on serve (plenty of aces mind) and goes down like Duke Street bridge in the forecourt. Any of the better baseliners will have him.

Chandra isn't likely to upset Serena, but she's a dangerous player. She was in the top 10 a couple of years ago before she got hurt. Actually, the thing I'm finding really exciting about women's tennis right now is the fact that there are a lot of really good players coming off of injuries and/or personal struggles who are ranked out of seeded positions (Rubin, Majoli and Pierce leap instantly to mind) who are just DANGEROUS. (Then again, on the men's side you've got seven of the top ten seeds out already... oops, make that eight.)

Mike I watched some of the Arthurs game and no, as far as I could tell, no breaks whatever. at one point after the first tie-break, they left the tiebreak sign up for the whole of the second set as if it was bound to happen and there was no point taking it down.

Yup, I do have fancy telly but when you watch it the screen seems rather horizontally compressed. You ought to come over next week to watch.

mind you, I don't think that Phillipoussis vs Krajicek will be a bundle of laughs.

Chris: cor, I might take you up on that.

Wednesday's giantkillers are doing terribly so far: Rochus has won one game in the first eleven vs Arnaud 'Dick' Clement and Bastl isn't doing much better vs Nalbandian. Roddick has nothing to offer vs Rusedski so far either; Greg might've have to do one of his disintegration acts to let him back in.

Hmmm, I was about to say "yay Belgium" when I read Michael's last update. (The BBC news site's continuous update seems to have broken down.)

Rochus Brothers > Are very cute. In some interview the one brother said he wanted the other's girlfriend because "She has the nicest tits"!!!
They are however very condescending about the female players.

agree on Roddick, he's getting a bit of a lesson out there, and did you see his eyes when he started losing the plot? Pure madman. Greg's serving looks pretty awesome though.

Maybe the Rochuses (Rochi?) are condescending 'cos they're smaller and weaker than most of the top women but could still beat them. No excuse, mind.

Radio 5 Live variously described Wednesday's heroes Olivier and George B as 'pathetic' and 'playing park tennis' yesterday. Rochus apparently won just three points in the first set v Ian Le Frenais' mate. Bastl was guilty of a couple of mid-court airshots. Well, we've all done it. (Beaten Pete Sampras, that is). (At Scrabble). (With a 75-point head-start).

Rusedski looking very good but then he did two years ago until he collapsed vs Philippoussis and last year until he ran into Goran. Who knows with ol' jaw-jut?

Epic 66-min first set today between Timbo and Ferreira (Centre Court is full of Souf Efrikaans); I think that may have been Wayney's Big Chance.

Oh, Jeff - just go to www.wimbledon.org, it's loads better. If you have a fast work connection, the IBM Real Time Scoreboard is worth activating.

As for Chandra v Serena - well, SW isn't moving terribly well on this surface, and CR did win Eastbourne last week. I've always liked Chandra; shame they can't meet a bit later on.

Just to continue this conversation with myself...

No Americans left in the men's singles (Jeff Morrison the last to go) - first time since 1922 there hasn't been a Yank in the last 16. Another test for a Williams sister - Venus drops the first set to Big Mo Drake on a point so good even her mum applauds.

Hewitt looking a bit awesome. Henman very lucky with an overrule at 1-4 in 3rd set t/b v Ferriera: IS IT ALL A BIG FIX?

Erk - I was wrong. Schalken, despite facing 11 break points throughout the 3rd set, has squeaked home in the tie-breaker with a dodgy overrule. It's fantastic stuff - Hewitt is f-ing and blinding after every single point he loses, whether there was anything he could do about it or not; the baseline exchanges are just *scary* in their brutality. [He still leads 6-2 6-2 6-7, btw].

Henman looks like finishing off Sa, but needs to effect some kind of Arthur Ashe transformation of his game to touch Lleyton (and I'm sure it still will be LH) tomorrow.

I need to go to Safeway, but where to fit in the grocery shopping on a day like this?

Henman frankly was lucky there. But hurrah all the same!

You should have gone while it was raining.

But then I'd have missed that nostalgia show - featuring It's A Knockout from Mansfield, and the treat of Stuart Hall slavering over Miss Sherwood Forest 1977 - "a rose between two thorns", said Eddie Waring, standing the other side of her.

Well, Schalkie is still saving break points like they're green shield stamps but it's gone off BBC2 now. Oh, for a flat in Walthamstow and a set-top box.

4th set to Schalken 6-1 - K-BLIMEY!

Creaky! Come on my Dutch friend!

watching Hewitt play is simply horrible, the man plays with no joy, only anger, and is the perfect representation of the point me and Jonnie were making ages ago about Aussie sportspeople being, in the main, a horrible bunch these days.

Jesus H Christ on the cross *being* crucified, that was a corker.

7-5 in the 5th to Hewitt after Schalken had twice been a break up, and had reached 30-40 on the Hewitt serve at 4-4 and 5-5 (the first occasion Hewitt scrambling a winning pass in a rally he seemed to be out of twice). I could've sworn that last Schalken forehand had hit the line - when did the judge put his arm out? I didn't see or hear the call.

Kinda glad I missed Henin crumble vs Venus; a break up at the start but not much for Purty Whale Girl after that: 6-3 6-2.

In other news, Kournikova and Rubin have knocked out the No.1 seeds in the women's doubles, but will probably have to face the Williams sisters in the semis (I think they're now two rounds behind). Also both Kournikova and Hantuchova are still in the mixed, so there are still at least some reasons to keep watching the tennis...

Also both Kournikova and Hantuchova are still in the mixed, so there are still at least some reasons to keep watching the tennis...

Neither of them 1/10th as attractive as Sjeng Schalken's girlfriend, but we won't be seeing any more of her unfortunately. Unless she gets her own chat show on Dutch cable.

I really thought yesterday was going to be all about the women's semis, but they were both non-events. Great climaxes to the Nalbandian-Lapentti and Krajicek-Malisse quarters, which prevented me from going to the shops until 7pm. By which time they were out of houmous. *Again*.

Bleeargh! Monkey muck!

Oh we do have fun.

I AM GONNA WATCH THE MALISSE MATCH THIS AFTERNOON

Another clip-fest this afternoon with the rain delay - this time 1985's hits and, er, smashes. (Don't worry Pinefox - I'm taping all of this stuff. There's a lot of Lynam in this one).

Quite what Animotion's "Obsession" had to do with Virginia Wade vs Claude Kohde-Kilsch, I'm not sure. We were mid-way through highlights of one of my favourite matches ever (Lendl v Leconte, 4th round), when BBC2 decided to switch to "Through The Keyhole" with Loyd Grossman. Outrageous. Apparently Henman and Hewitt are out on court, so BBC1's daytime schedule has to be flipped to the minor channel, so we can watch them warm up on One. I'm digging out my electric typewriter with the cursive script, so I can send an irate letter to the late Barry Took.

3:17pm: first set to Hewitt 7-5. He served for it at 5-3 and was broken to love, but broke Henman to 15 in the 12th. It's great stuff, Henman playing pretty well.

Natalie: I fear Xavier may be relegated to #1 court if this one runs later or there's more rain.

Nathalie, I'm sorry.

3:36pm: rain again, after Hewitt breaks to lead 3-0 in the 2nd set. Timbo was looking like he'd run out of ideas, so is probably glad of the interruption.

4:29pm: they're back out on court. It's kinda sunny now.

4:46pm: Hewitt gets a second break and wraps up second set: leads 7-5 6-1. Malisse-Nalbandian *has* been switched to court #1 - I hope Nathalie can see it, cos I can't. They're early in the first set.

In other Belgian news, Els Callens, who gave Serena W a fright a few days ago, is close to victory in the q-f of the mixed with Commander Koenig.

5:18pm: Hewitt leads 5-3 in the 3rd. The end is nigh.

5:27pm: Timmy's Not Dead. Henman breaks back for 5-5.

5:31pm: Hewitt breaks again with a topspin lob. Henman slowing down the rallies with Ashe-like dinks and floats, but it's not really working.

[Is anyone reading this, or should I just stop?]

5:37pm: Hewitt ace, picking up pigment on the way down the centre - G, S & M; 7-5 6-1 7-5.

Nalbandian with the edge in first-set t/b vs Malisse on #1.

I bet it rains again now.

Don't stop! This is the only place I am looking for Wimbledon news. Far better than any World Cup coverage on the web!

Ok...

Nalbandian-Malisse is very high quality stuff: Nal ahead 7-6 3-1. But some strangeness at end of first set, when Xavier M disappeared for almost ten minutes; he'd complained of some chest pains, had treatment, then vanished with medics. Nalbandian sat in his chair wondering exactly when his opponent was going to be defaulted for exceeding the treatment time-out limit. But he wasn't and the second semi continues.

*Very* dark here in Crystal Palace - I know they get the weather first in the west, but I can't believe they'll finish this tonight.

6:55pm local time - they went off at Wimbledon about 40 minutes ago (Nalbandian leading 7-6 4-2). It's thrashing it down with rain in this bit of South London, so not too hopeful.

Now 8:25pm, and the David'n'Xavier show is back on. Xavier was suffering from heart palpitations earlier, apparently.

It's *outstanding* tennis, and Nalbandian currently leads 7-6 6-4 1- 6, with Malisse in the ascendancy.

I'm reading it too, but mainly for the funny bits. It is my favourite thread now the World Cup's finished.

There are funny bits? Can you point them out to me?

Well, Pony-Tail was lording it over Peach-Fuzz when bad light forced them to come off just before 9pm - Malisse won the 4th set 6-2 to level the match. They'll come back tomorrow. It's been one of the best matches of the whole event; Nalbandian was in control when the rain came earlier, but now gets his own back as the overnight break has stopped Xavier's charge. I hope XM gets some pills for that dicky ticker.

Either of them could cause Hewitt some grief in this form. Might you, I think I said that about Cedric Pioline a few years ago when he beat Stich in a spectacular semi. Sampras crucified him in the final. In the biblical sense, of course.

I see Serena is the new #1 (which means Venus is the new #2; I am #6), regardless of the result tomorrow. I expect a coin is being tossed in a southwest London apartment as we speak. "Your turn, sis".

I've just thought of a way Tim Henman can finally get past the semi- final stage at Wimbledon: GET TO NUMBER 2 IN THE WORLD. Winning the US Open would probably do it.

Easy.

Oh, and while I'm attempting to make up 50% of all the posts on this thread on my ownsome - in what sense is the phenomenon of Lleyton Hewitt 2001-2 different to Jim Courier 1991-2? Similar counterpunching style, no apparent gift for net play, big flat serve, very aggressive. Perhaps Lleyton's status as untouchable winning machine will be similarly shortlived? In which case, Roger Federer 2003- = Pete Sampras 1993- ?

Xavier Malisse's palpitations were not physical - merely nerves. It was certainly apparent after the doctor had a checkup and talk: He didn't complain once again during the rest of the match. Did he make a comeback or WHAT? Oh my! :-)

Last year's Wimbledon thread is one of my favourite ever on ILE, and I dont even watch the tennis - great discussion and analysis. This year's isn't as good but still very readable - no reflection of Mike, who is working effectively solo this time, whereas last time there was more Pinefoxian and (I think) Daf Moore-ian involvement. I tried watching the actual tennis yesterday and it wasnt nearly as entertaining.

For 'funny bits' read 'shopping updates' and 'replacement viewing reports'. And 'Come on Crikey, my Dutch friend.'

McEnroe was interviewd yesterday on BBC Sportstalk. Unfortunately I could only watch the first ten minutes, but it was engaging stuff. he mentioned his book about 36 times in ten minutes, so that might turn out to be a good read. He said Borg was like a rock star. But which rock star? Jim Morrison, I suppose.

I have only seen Lleyton Hewitt play once, and he lost. It was the Davis Cup against Spain. He was washed away on a tide of national hysteria.

Perhaps Lleyton had a bigger boat this time? I don't think we do sporting hysteria nearly as well as Spain and South America; if you're unfortunate enough to find yourself on the visiting team in a Davis Cup tie in Santiago, well... I know, I've been there. Me & Mark Cox, 1974. I lost the sight in one eye and Mark's still in prison. Some trumped-up traffic offence. But he can't even drive.

PJ: I did know what you meant by funny bits, I was just being contrary in an effort to engineer another one.

Tom: if the tennis still isn't more entertaining than B*g B*****r after all our efforts, last year and this, then we have failed.

Nathalie: they're still going with the 'heart problems' angle here, I think. Most frustratingly, they've scheduled the final set of Malisse v Nalbandian at the same time as the women's final; I don't see the Gregory Peck or George C Scott films on BBC2 being cancelled, so I won't see it live. DG will be pleased.

Nice interview with handlebar-moustachioed trick-shot clown Mansour Bahrami on R5L this morning; living in Iran under the Ayatollah, he was banned from playing tennis from age 21 to 31. Now he plays the veterans' circuit, dazzling and confusing people who marvel at his skill while wondering why they never heard of him as a young man. He met his wife in a traffic jam on the Champs-Elysees at 11:59pm, New Year's Eve, 1981. He asked her for a midnight kiss through the windows of their adjacent cars, and two years later they were hitched.

Aww.

Nalbandian is through to the Wimbledon final: 6-2 in the 5th. From a break down, he won the last five games vs Malisse. He was outaced 25- 1 by Xavier, so the weaker server makes it through to face Lleyton. Oh dear.

Serena about to serve for the first set vs Venus at 5-4.

Malisse lost. :-((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((

williams sisters in half decent match shocker, at least the bits i've seen. how long did the tie break go on for? S now 4-2 up in the second

Tie-break was 7-4. Serena far too good in the end, but that double fault by Venus at 3-4 in the 2nd set brought back memories of Harrison Park when I was 13. At least I only had the funny little man who ran the bowls club watching me muck up. Krajicek also hit a howler at the vital moment vs Malisse. I could offer coaching tips on this - how to catch it on the top of the frame, how to bounce it, ping-pong style, on the ground *before* it reaches the net, how to pull your shoulder out, how to hit yourself in the face with the racket on the follow-through.

Serena thanked Jehovah twice in her speech - that's a stoning offence, isn't it?

I wish I'd seen the end of that match! The first set was great, especially Serena.

I've just scanned the second half of this. Troussé, Miller and Ewing were right - amid (and, of course, due to and in dialogue with) the facts and statistics, the heart of this thread indeed beats with an unmistakable, understated comic intelligence that might be something a bit like genius.

Also - Cabbage, I agree about the Aussies. And Nathalie, I like Malisse too.

unmistakable, understated comic intelligence that might be something a bit like genius

Paul Squire posted?

Here's a thing: you often get a cracking semi-final in that half of the men's draw where all the upsets happen, between a rank outsider and some not quite so unfancied but who was also booked on a flight out of Heathrow on the second Monday.

Chris Lewis v Kevin Curren 1983, MaliVai Washington v Todd Martin 1996, Cedric Pioline v Michael Stich [Stich unseeded and in decline by that stage] 1997... some others I can't remember. All great matches, and all won by the Dudley Moore of the pairing - leaving us with a hopelessly one-sided final (McEnroe, Krajicek, Sampras easy winners respectively).

I know this doesn't quite map perfectly to this year (Malisse and Nalbandian being much closer in ability and ranking, but Xavier beat Kafelnikov, Rusedski and Krajicek - that makes him Peter Cook in my book), but, erm, it leaves us with not very much to look forward to tomorrow.

Whatever happened to Nduka Odizor?

"Cloudy with some brightness", says Ceefax page 401, with the characteristic vagueness that infuriates Lady P - but it's 'rained' twice during the men's final so far.

Nalbandian, whose girlfriend is some strange cross between Alan Cumming and Colin Jackson, started appallingly but has suddenly found some form in the last 20 minutes. Hewitt leads 6-1 3-3 (but did serve for 3-0 in the 2nd). The Argentinian ambassador is being played by Roberto Benigni.

The drizzle continues...

David N only really played well between the two rain breaks... 6-1 6- 3 6-2 to the Aussie Ball of Hate (compliment, natch).

Meanwhile, Bjorkman/Woodbridge lead Knowles/Nestor two sets to one in the MD final, Bhupathi/LIQUORSAVER through to the XD final with a win over Don Johnson and Kimberley Michael Thomas.

It's no compliment (natch) from me: if that's Hate, Viva (of all things) -- Love.

You did say 'Don Johnson', didn't you? Is that a joke I don't yet fully understand, or...?

Paul Squire? Never heard of him - I was thinking of Terry Venables' occasional contributions upthread. (I think DG has subsequently deleted them. Legal difficulties, you know.)

The Ball of Rage is apparently having two weeks off. He seemed to have clamed down a lot in the snippet of interview I saw - he's just like the rest of us really, in need of a good holiday.

What are we going to do now?

Calmed, not clamed.

What are we going to do now?

Long walks and trips to Croydon Central Library.

The Guardian pointed out today that Henman, then 26, was the youngest of the semi-finalists last year by 20-odd months; this year he was the oldest by about six years. I expect a flood of forgotten 23- and 24-year-olds to dominate the Championships in 2003.

The mainstream press don't seem to have picked up on my Jim Courier theory. I posted it to all the papers. Second class, mind. Check yr back pages tomorrow.