'public signs which wouldn't exist in a better world'

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I have a morbid fascination with photographing noticeboards, billboards, and other public signs - I should develop a real hobby, but this one keeps me occupied. Lately, they seem to be getting weirder and I'm beginning to worry about the world, e.g. - All around our Uni cafe...

"Please don't spit on the tables"

Has anyone else noticed this shit?

― ToaRoa, Friday, 28 June 2002 00:00 (twenty-three years ago)

They should have 'Don't Put Chewing Gum on the Undersides of The Tables You Dirty Bastards' signs in caffs. Oh yes.

― DavidM, Friday, 28 June 2002 00:00 (twenty-three years ago)

the sign says you got to have a membership card to get inside....UUUHhh!

― Ron, Friday, 28 June 2002 00:00 (twenty-three years ago)

"And the sign said long haired freaky people need not apply..."

― nickn, Friday, 28 June 2002 00:00 (twenty-three years ago)

ToaROa, Ephemerea of all sorts fascanites me, and i as well am obsessed with the signage-mostly lettering though. I took lots and lots of sign piccies in london. Can you share yrs ?

― anthony, Friday, 28 June 2002 00:00 (twenty-three years ago)

There was just a whole ad break of fun-then-stern public information warnings: Lawnmowers are dangerous to kids; don't play with lighters (and don't play with matches) and Take Out Travel Insurance. Plus there was a keep off the railway lines one in the last break.

I feel safe now.

― Graham, Friday, 28 June 2002 00:00 (twenty-three years ago)

"Do not ask for credit as refusal will only prove to you your innermost fears, to whit that you are not worthy of credit even in this flea-ridden shithole. Admit it to yourself, in those quiet hours when fesr encroaches you know this to be true, you have lied to yourself from day one. The success you have always talked of is not just around the corner, it's never going to arrive. You will drink yourself to death whilst still trying to justify your existence to a rapidly diminishing circle of friends who are becoming increasingly immune to your excuses. You never tried hard enough did you? DID YOU? no. Now don't come whining to me for credit because Daddy's stopped your allowance thirty years too late, you miserable excuse of a wannabe. Queue outside Burger King for scraps like the rest of the idiots who thought they were too talented to get a proper job you TWAT"
Think I may have missed my vocation. Signwriting's clearly the job for me.

― Matt, Friday, 28 June 2002 00:00 (twenty-three years ago)

toa where you at, which university has 'do not spit on the tables' signs? i certainly havent seen those at otago. altho i am not a student so i don't go there much.

― unknown or illegal user, Friday, 28 June 2002 00:00 (twenty-three years ago)

Toa from Auckland where I really hope that it was a spelling mistake.

― ToaRoa, Friday, 28 June 2002 00:00 (twenty-three years ago)

"Importation of Honey Bees is Illegal" is my favorite sign still. Complete with picture of bee with a no smoking style circle around it. Its on the transcanada as you cross over to NS right befeor the bridge takes you into Amherst.

― Mr Noodles, Friday, 28 June 2002 00:00 (twenty-three years ago)

yall nz'ers are a bunch of naughty spitters!!!

― Ron, Friday, 28 June 2002 00:00 (twenty-three years ago)

PTOO!

― unknown or illegal user, Friday, 28 June 2002 00:00 (twenty-three years ago)

However... I did live in Dunedin for... too long and, at my old high school, I remember a sign saying "Please do not destroy the musical equipment - It is there for YOUR beneift."

The b'stards used the only double base that I could get access too as bob sleigh!

― ToaRoa, Friday, 28 June 2002 00:00 (twenty-three years ago)

"...those quiet hours when fesr encroaches..."
Aye, many's the night when, as a wee lad, I would huddle, shaking, in my bed-clothes, breath steaming in the cold winter air, petrified; my eyes fix'd to the closet door, searching endlessly for any sign of the dreaded encroaching Fesr.

― Dan i., Saturday, 29 June 2002 00:00 (twenty-three years ago)

A guy I used to know lived in Saudi Arabia for a while as a contractor and said he saw a sign at a beach that said "Do not butcher sheep on the beach" which he thought funny so he took a picture of it, only to soon stumble across a group of people doing just that.

― nickn, Saturday, 29 June 2002 00:00 (twenty-three years ago)

I know that the signs on the highways with big question marks on them mean that there is a tourist information booth coming up soon, but still it cracks me up to see a big sign in the middle of nowhere that says "?" - I mean, is "INFO" too hard to fit on a sign?

― Ally, Sunday, 30 June 2002 00:00 (twenty-three years ago)

http://home.graffiti.net/buglebear/phojan9.gif

This is my favourite road sign...apart from the grafitti that I saw once which read "no shagging on the beach".

― jel --, Sunday, 30 June 2002 00:00 (twenty-three years ago)

Great pic! If this thread survives a day or two, I might throw up a few of my own.

Contestation of social control via graffiti in the manner of 'public notices' - even better! Along that line, my favourite would have to be the large slogan out at Ocean Beach, near Dunedin. Along the coast from there, the city shits collectively through the Lawyers head sewerage outfall. The sign reads, 'Swim between the turds.'

― ToaRoa, Sunday, 30 June 2002 00:00 (twenty-three years ago)

The golf course up the road has two BLANK signs that say NO DOGS ALLOWED

― ducklingmonster, Sunday, 30 June 2002 00:00 (twenty-three years ago)

Ducklingmonster speak with forked tongue.... Sorry, I don't get your riddle, though I'm sure that it's a good one! [Ummm - you're not the same duckling that recently referred to a mutual friend's old flame as "pathetic" by any chance? That would be too weird, cos I'm the old flame ;-) ]

― ToaRoa, Sunday, 30 June 2002 00:00 (twenty-three years ago)

In a better world, farmers wouldn't be able to do this...

http://toaroa.sphosting.com/pics/von_brdg.jpg

[i.e. blow-up 'private' bridges along the public (Von River) road, just cos they've recently bought themselves a hunking great 4WD and no longer need the bridge.] Nationalise all private property, now!

― ToaRoa, Sunday, 30 June 2002 00:00 (twenty-three years ago)

"Fesr"
It's easy to laugh at typos. So go right ahead.

― Matt, Sunday, 30 June 2002 00:00 (twenty-three years ago)

this photo was taken a few years ago at dromana, a sleepy beach-side town:

― minna, Sunday, 30 June 2002 00:00 (twenty-three years ago)