why do i hate that artist thing that people keep posting on my facebook so much? why am i such a jerk?

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I would think they're loading a shipping container with 5 year olds or something because there's no way it'd be cost effective to escort individuals to South Africa one at a time at a mere $2500.

⌘-B (mh), Friday, 3 October 2014 13:16 (nine years ago) link

guess i'll have to poke liam neeson.

pplains, Friday, 3 October 2014 13:21 (nine years ago) link

But what if HE'S THE PAEDOPHILE!

(Liam, if you're reading, I don't think you're a paedophile)

DISMISSED AS CHANCE (NotEnough), Friday, 3 October 2014 14:33 (nine years ago) link

$2500? Seems kind of high-risk/low-reward for kidnapping and sex trafficking.

Kiarostami bag (milo z), Friday, 3 October 2014 14:37 (nine years ago) link

Would take some serious Ebay-like IT efficiency to initiate, conduct and complete a whole child sex trafficking e-auction in the few seconds between the time you "check in" at your child's school and the time you step foot off campus.

Bnad, Friday, 3 October 2014 15:50 (nine years ago) link

<ins=:Bidnapper/Kidnapper joke>

Mark G, Friday, 3 October 2014 15:51 (nine years ago) link

the bathos of facebook warning stories

GhostTunes on my Pono (Sufjan Grafton), Friday, 3 October 2014 15:55 (nine years ago) link

Meanwhile, the mystery guy whose friend request you hurriedly accepted earlier this morning is texting 60 other grown men across the world with the caption "Caucasian female. Age 5. Brown hair, green eyes. 40 bucks."

GhostTunes on my Pono (Sufjan Grafton), Friday, 3 October 2014 15:58 (nine years ago) link

OBO

GhostTunes on my Pono (Sufjan Grafton), Friday, 3 October 2014 15:59 (nine years ago) link

I envision a dark future where child sex trafficking e-auctions are fully automated like stock trading and the dirty business of doing the actual abduction is handled by robot copter drones.

Bnad, Friday, 3 October 2014 16:08 (nine years ago) link

Amazon.com's dark underbelly

πŸ’ͺ😈⚠️ (DJP), Friday, 3 October 2014 16:10 (nine years ago) link

do American schools just let 6 year-old kids walk off with anybody at the end of the day?

Chimp Arsons, Friday, 3 October 2014 16:26 (nine years ago) link

5 year-olds even

Chimp Arsons, Friday, 3 October 2014 16:26 (nine years ago) link

Yes, because the market demands it.

Immediate Follower (NA), Friday, 3 October 2014 16:27 (nine years ago) link

gonna stop friending guys with cute profile pics just in case

Chimp Arsons, Friday, 3 October 2014 16:28 (nine years ago) link

On a related note, some guy in the UK got jailed today for selling fake bomb detectors that could also allegedly be used to detect trafficked people thusly:

The instruction manuals that accompanied their products claimed the user’s static electricity would power the aerial to move if it detected the substance it was searching for. The device could supposedly track down missing people – including, it was claimed, Madeleine McCann – by simply putting a photo of the individual in the box

john wahey (NickB), Friday, 3 October 2014 16:35 (nine years ago) link

Β£80m they made off this thing

john wahey (NickB), Friday, 3 October 2014 16:35 (nine years ago) link

actually this has got much more detail: http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-29477894

john wahey (NickB), Friday, 3 October 2014 16:42 (nine years ago) link

almost feel like it shdn't be a crime to make money off anybody stupid enough to buy one of those

Chimp Arsons, Friday, 3 October 2014 16:47 (nine years ago) link

Egyptian government bought 1,000,000 of the things and they're using them to detect HIV and hepatitis :/

john wahey (NickB), Friday, 3 October 2014 16:52 (nine years ago) link

what the hell

πŸ’ͺ😈⚠️ (DJP), Friday, 3 October 2014 16:56 (nine years ago) link

i remember the original TV reports from maybe 2 years back, that governments were buying these things was unbelievable then

Chimp Arsons, Friday, 3 October 2014 16:57 (nine years ago) link

$2500? Seems kind of high-risk/low-reward for kidnapping and sex trafficking.

― Kiarostami bag (milo z)

picking up random kids from daycares all over the city, you could net 50k in a day. don't friend strangers!

LIKE If you are against racism (omar little), Friday, 3 October 2014 17:00 (nine years ago) link

what the hell

― πŸ’ͺ😈⚠️ (DJP), Friday, October 3, 2014 11:56 AM (30 minutes ago) Bookmark

cross over the mushroom circle (La Lechera), Friday, 3 October 2014 17:27 (nine years ago) link

silver cyber platter

kinder, Friday, 3 October 2014 18:03 (nine years ago) link

"Heh Heh heh, this naΓ―ve facebook idiot has unwittingly disclosed to me the location of a live child."

my jaw left (Hurting 2), Friday, 3 October 2014 18:36 (nine years ago) link

"Roosevelt Elementary School. Bingo."

my jaw left (Hurting 2), Friday, 3 October 2014 18:37 (nine years ago) link

"And all along, I've been looking for children at muffler repair joints and legal library stacks. What a fool I was... until now."

Doctor Casino, Friday, 3 October 2014 18:40 (nine years ago) link

Half past three then? Ah, that's why nobody was there at half past seven...

Mark G, Friday, 3 October 2014 19:48 (nine years ago) link

No, the cute pic was a fake!

You know what paedos look like, right?

― Mark G, Friday, 3 October 2014 12:46 (Yesterday) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

paedos of wigan got the look bang on:

He was described as white, in his late 50s, 6ft and slim, with short grey hair, stubble and yellow teeth. He was wearing a long black coat with stains on, bare legs from the knees down and grey shoes.

NI, Saturday, 4 October 2014 02:39 (nine years ago) link

My cousin has posted that one.

bippity bup at the hotel california (Phil D.), Monday, 6 October 2014 12:34 (nine years ago) link

SOMETIMES THE NICEST PEOPLE YOU
MEET ARE COVERED IN MEMES &
SOMETIMES THE MOST JUDGMENTAL
PEOPLE YOU MEET POST ON ILX ON
MONDAYS.

- FORKS THANG

the other song about butts in the top 5 (forksclovetofu), Monday, 6 October 2014 17:39 (nine years ago) link

lol @ FORKS THANG

mattresslessness, Monday, 6 October 2014 17:56 (nine years ago) link

http://i.imgur.com/Ay85suO.jpg

global tetrahedron, Monday, 6 October 2014 22:59 (nine years ago) link

Miranda's

global tetrahedron, Monday, 6 October 2014 22:59 (nine years ago) link

fewer

polyphonic, Monday, 6 October 2014 22:59 (nine years ago) link

less of their what?

LIKE If you are against racism (omar little), Monday, 6 October 2014 23:00 (nine years ago) link

and not And

mattresslessness, Monday, 6 October 2014 23:02 (nine years ago) link

and try using a period

mattresslessness, Monday, 6 October 2014 23:03 (nine years ago) link

And don't get me started about that font!

nickn, Monday, 6 October 2014 23:39 (nine years ago) link

OK, Vicar.

Mark G, Monday, 6 October 2014 23:40 (nine years ago) link

It's Adam and Eve, not Kim and Kanye's!

Doctor Casino, Tuesday, 7 October 2014 04:23 (nine years ago) link

i really dislike that picture.

Nhex, Tuesday, 7 October 2014 06:11 (nine years ago) link

The world needs less mixed race couple's
And more white couple's

polyphonic doing good work

GhostTunes on my Pono (Sufjan Grafton), Tuesday, 7 October 2014 19:14 (nine years ago) link

https://fbcdn-sphotos-d-a.akamaihd.net/hphotos-ak-xpa1/v/t1.0-9/1620550_814188421932064_1643979211_n.jpg?oh=35f6bb5d4f2d55e7768bfcc07ae4d1c8&oe=54AD6F86&__gda__=1422500962_0f1509338ab191eb558d82c158cdea47

hey guys, black people wear baggy clothing and also we're recaptioning someone else's cartoon.

how's life, Wednesday, 8 October 2014 14:25 (nine years ago) link

I went back to see what the original was, figuring the Bizarro strip would've had a more twisted take:

http://www.flubu.com/comics/Bizarro-weightloss.gif

More twisted than I imagined.

pplains, Wednesday, 8 October 2014 16:00 (nine years ago) link

Haha, see what I mean?

pplains, Wednesday, 8 October 2014 16:00 (nine years ago) link

http://i.imgur.com/m3sGGyH.gif

pplains, Wednesday, 8 October 2014 16:01 (nine years ago) link


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