Why do I hate that thing (excluding image macros) that people put on facebook? Why am I such a jerk?

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Today, it was this:


Also a lot of totally cool pumpkin carvings and totally rad haloween costumes, made by someone, uploaded to somewhere, usually collected in some one other place, and then shared by some one or ones on facebook. It isn't necessarily the content that's the problem, but the sharing also.

I see this thread as a sister thread to the one about stupid image macros.

cardamon, Saturday, 2 November 2013 01:21 (five years ago) Permalink

Anything on buzzfeed.

zanana rebozo (abanana), Saturday, 2 November 2013 02:18 (five years ago) Permalink

not sure i want this thread in my life

^^ post obviously honoring and supporting Qualcomm (zachlyon), Saturday, 2 November 2013 02:31 (five years ago) Permalink

I myself am dubious of the premise

cardamon, Saturday, 2 November 2013 03:47 (five years ago) Permalink

argh why would you post that when it's already over? you tease

chilli, Saturday, 2 November 2013 21:12 (five years ago) Permalink

two months pass...

i wish it were possible to filter posts by FB friends according to content — e.g. there is a schoolmate who is a nice dude in person and not obnoxious at all, but his fb posts are all laundry lists of what he's doing/going to do at the gym/in his workout.

clouds, Sunday, 19 January 2014 22:00 (four years ago) Permalink

I've had it up to here with links to articles with enigmatic, leading titles ... but nothing could prepare me for what happened next.

cardamon, Monday, 20 January 2014 06:47 (four years ago) Permalink

The worst is how they assume you have a child's emotional response range, and a brain the size of a walnut. And there's no way to answer back, to insist that their blanket claims don't speak for you.

This earthworm will utterly terrify you... then you'll be amazed by what it does for the soil!

Doctor Casino, Monday, 20 January 2014 12:51 (four years ago) Permalink

lol You'll Be Amazed What Happens To This Tooth Kept In A Glass Of Coca Cola For A Few Days

UK Cop Humour (Bananaman Begins), Monday, 20 January 2014 12:58 (four years ago) Permalink

On band pages, people who comment on the announcement of a set of tour dates with "Play [name of their town]!!!"

my father will guide me up the stairs to bed (anagram), Monday, 20 January 2014 13:03 (four years ago) Permalink

its all fucking shit isnt it all of it

the Shearer of simulated snowsex etc. (Dwight Yorke), Monday, 20 January 2014 13:21 (four years ago) Permalink


Those are really cute dogs and I feel bad for them but GFY.

Kiarostami bag (milo z), Monday, 20 January 2014 18:21 (four years ago) Permalink

You guys are on the wrong thread, btw.

emil.y, Monday, 20 January 2014 19:26 (four years ago) Permalink

oops, ctrl-f'd Facebook

Kiarostami bag (milo z), Monday, 20 January 2014 19:29 (four years ago) Permalink

dammit :(

bizarro gazzara, Monday, 20 January 2014 19:33 (four years ago) Permalink

Here Are 12 Unborn Animals In The Womb. They're Absolutely Beautiful...Especially The Dolphin.
Except the shark. That thing is still terrifying.

my whole family is catholic so look at the pickle i'm in (zachlyon), Tuesday, 21 January 2014 02:27 (four years ago) Permalink

hate hate hate hate hate hate upworthy and all such sites with a furious passion. simply because they're so patronising, paint everyone with the same brush and are pushing online media even further into the diseased and sucking maw of the clickbait model.

president of the people's republic of antarctica (Arctic Mindbath), Tuesday, 21 January 2014 02:30 (four years ago) Permalink

also, the passive-aggressive posts directed at unnamed co-workers/associates of the status-poster, for the sole purpose of moaning and not actually engaging in constructive communication to solve their problems with each other.

president of the people's republic of antarctica (Arctic Mindbath), Tuesday, 21 January 2014 02:32 (four years ago) Permalink

Those can be pretty grim. Certain people do that a lot.

cardamon, Tuesday, 21 January 2014 04:52 (four years ago) Permalink

Erotically charged holiday/nightclub photographs and the comments they engender

cardamon, Tuesday, 21 January 2014 04:57 (four years ago) Permalink

Nothing Could Prepare Me For This Comment Engendered By An Erotically-charged Holiday/Nightclub Photo

cardamon, Tuesday, 21 January 2014 04:58 (four years ago) Permalink

especially the dolphin

my whole family is catholic so look at the pickle i'm in (zachlyon), Tuesday, 21 January 2014 05:06 (four years ago) Permalink

except the shark

my whole family is catholic so look at the pickle i'm in (zachlyon), Tuesday, 21 January 2014 05:06 (four years ago) Permalink


cardamon, Tuesday, 21 January 2014 05:15 (four years ago) Permalink

my one republican/libertarian fb friend had a long screed today about how the founding fathers were geniuses but the current government is run by idiots. (imo they're not idiots, but they're way too in the thrall of multinational corporations and big oil and lobbyists.)

Esa-Pekka Merkerson (get bent), Tuesday, 21 January 2014 05:55 (four years ago) Permalink

They Went For A Canoe Ride To The Island. What They Saw On The Way Back Was Unimaginable.
I can't believe they caught it on film.

Doctor Casino, Tuesday, 21 January 2014 06:22 (four years ago) Permalink

Is it sad I think I know what that one is without even having anything to click on? (footage of s flock of birds swooshing about (I know theres a proper term for it but the word escapes me).

the Bronski Review (Trayce), Tuesday, 21 January 2014 08:13 (four years ago) Permalink

"footage" sounds correct to me

wilful brony (DJ Mencap), Tuesday, 21 January 2014 08:50 (four years ago) Permalink

She Stretches And Glides Her Body Over A Blank Canvas When I Realized What She...

he said, sexily, (dog latin), Tuesday, 21 January 2014 09:22 (four years ago) Permalink

You Won't Believe Who Is The Centrefold Model In This Dirty Magazine You're Tugging Off To

UK Cop Humour (Bananaman Begins), Tuesday, 21 January 2014 10:21 (four years ago) Permalink

No I meant theres a word for the close formation flock swooping some birds do.

the Bronski Review (Trayce), Tuesday, 21 January 2014 10:59 (four years ago) Permalink

I knew that I was just acting in the spirit of the thread title

wilful brony (DJ Mencap), Tuesday, 21 January 2014 11:02 (four years ago) Permalink

such a jerk

Doctor Casino, Tuesday, 21 January 2014 14:11 (four years ago) Permalink

His First Four Sentences Made Me Skeptical. But His Fifth Sentence Blew My Mind. The Sixth Made Me Question The Existence Of God. By His Seventh I Was Beating Off. I Cleaned Up During His Eighth Just In Time For His Ninth To Blow My Mind All Over Again.

frogbs, Tuesday, 21 January 2014 14:28 (four years ago) Permalink

Trayce, You Wouldn't Believe The Word For Flocks of Bird Swooping in Formation.
And when you learn it you'll cry.

(It's murmuration)

emil.y, Tuesday, 21 January 2014 14:36 (four years ago) Permalink

*sobs*, shares.

UK Cop Humour (Bananaman Begins), Tuesday, 21 January 2014 15:39 (four years ago) Permalink

Know what? The "hide posts from Zimbio" thing does nothing.

pplains, Tuesday, 21 January 2014 15:41 (four years ago) Permalink

http://i.imgur.com/Z2djWpG.jpg http://i.imgur.com/fzIreVg.jpg

pplains, Tuesday, 21 January 2014 15:47 (four years ago) Permalink


clouds, Tuesday, 21 January 2014 15:49 (four years ago) Permalink

Man Tries to Hug a Wild Lion, You Won’t Believe What Happens Next!
When you hear of someone trying to hug a wild lion, you immediately think you know exactly what's about to happen. But trust me when i say, you will not

my whole family is catholic so look at the pickle i'm in (zachlyon), Wednesday, 22 January 2014 01:22 (four years ago) Permalink

Trayce, You Wouldn't Believe The Word For Flocks of Bird Swooping in Formation.
And when you learn it you'll cry.

(It's murmuration)

Hahaha! (thankyou. I thought it was sussuration so I was close)

the Bronski Review (Trayce), Wednesday, 22 January 2014 02:20 (four years ago) Permalink

She's all I need, all my life
I feel so good if I just say the word

UK Cop Humour (Bananaman Begins), Wednesday, 22 January 2014 10:07 (four years ago) Permalink

You're the meaning in my life...

Doctor Casino, Wednesday, 22 January 2014 13:29 (four years ago) Permalink

A Guy Started Dancing Alone – But What Happened Next Was Amazing

my father will guide me up the stairs to bed (anagram), Friday, 31 January 2014 12:41 (four years ago) Permalink

Here Are The Top 37 Things Dying People Say They Regret. Learn From It Before It’s Too Late

my father will guide me up the stairs to bed (anagram), Saturday, 1 February 2014 06:23 (four years ago) Permalink

repost of a reblog of a german article which is a re-write of an australian article that says "hey vegans! you killed a load of animals. macho red meat eaters save the world with kindness to animals you narcissistic hippies. suck it up!"
wack science, warped invective & cherry picked statistics in original.
bros meat down yo's i gotsta loves me some red steak y'all

massaman gai, Saturday, 1 February 2014 06:51 (four years ago) Permalink

Not a vegan but fuck that

cardamon, Saturday, 1 February 2014 07:06 (four years ago) Permalink

"cup the balls"

painfully alive in a drugged and dying culture (DavidM), Monday, 27 October 2014 01:17 (four years ago) Permalink


, Monday, 27 October 2014 12:41 (four years ago) Permalink

that's silly how would the bull know what the badge meant

intelligent, expressive males within the greater metropolitan (Bananaman Begins), Monday, 27 October 2014 13:36 (four years ago) Permalink

two months pass...

I feel like there's a thread where this kind of thing is specifically discussed, but this bozo in Chicago is apparently the wellspring for a lot of this kind of garbage: http://www.newyorker.com/magazine/2015/01/05/virologist.

Here's one of his most popular sites: http://www.givesmehope.com/top

carl agatha, Monday, 12 January 2015 14:44 (three years ago) Permalink

'emerson spartz' is a spectacular name

bizarro gazzara, Monday, 12 January 2015 15:31 (three years ago) Permalink


(David Cross voice)
"Oh my god, they poisoned your kids, I'm so sorry for your loss that's devastating!"
"Well they're not dead."
"Oh, thank god! I guess the hospital was able to save them?"
"Well, we didn't go to the hospital."
"You didn't?! But what did you do?"
"What do you mean?"
"What did you do when they poisoned your kids?"

walid foster dulles (man alive), Tuesday, 13 January 2015 03:49 (three years ago) Permalink

When I read 'monsanto' I always think of it as ChristoPHA Moltisanti

kinder, Tuesday, 13 January 2015 14:24 (three years ago) Permalink

"not everyone has to change the world" -Emerson Spartz

Abstinence Hawk (frogbs), Tuesday, 13 January 2015 15:36 (three years ago) Permalink


emil.y, Tuesday, 13 January 2015 15:47 (three years ago) Permalink

Spartz left before dessert, which he called “a low return on investment, calorically.”

there are several arguable money lines in this piece but I think this is my favourite

hot takes: audit in progress (DJ Mencap), Tuesday, 13 January 2015 16:58 (three years ago) Permalink

five months pass...

whoops wrong thread

got bent (mild cheezed off vibes) (s.clover), Monday, 15 June 2015 04:21 (three years ago) Permalink

four weeks pass...

This is one of the SADDEST stories ever told in Hollywood. His name is Sylvestar Stallone. One of the BIGGEST and Most famous American Movie superstars. Back in the day, Stallone was a
struggling actor in every definition. At some point, he got so broke that he stole his wife's jewellery and sold it. Things got so bad that he even ended up homeless. Yes, he slept at the New York bus station for 3 days. Unable to pay rent or afford food. His lowest point came when he tried to sell his dog at the liquor store to any
stranger. He didn't have money to feed the dog anymore. He sold it at $25 only. He says he walked away crying.

Two weeks later,he saw a boxing match between Mohammed Ali and Chuck Wepner and that match gave him the inspiration to write the script for the famous movie,ROCKY. He wrote the script for 20 hours! He tried to sell it and got an offer for $125,000 for the script. But he had just ONE REQUEST. He wanted to STAR in
the movie. He wanted to be the MAIN ACTOR. Rocky himself. But the studio said NO. They wanted a REAL STAR.

They said he "Looked funny and talked funny". He left with his script. A few weeks later,the studio offered him $250,000 for the script. He refused. They even offered $350,000. He still refused. They wanted his movie. But NOT him. He said NO. He had to be

After a while,the studio agreed,gave him $35,000 for the script and let him star in it! The rest is history! The movie won Best Picture, Best Directing and Best Film Editing at the prestigious
Oscar Awards. He was even nominated for BEST ACTOR! The Movie ROCKY was even inducted into the American National Film Registry as one of the greatest movies ever!

And do You know the first thing he bought with the $35,000? THE DOG HE SOLD. Yes,Stallone LOVED HIS DOG SO MUCH that he stood at the liquor store for 3 days waiting for the man he sold
his dog to. And on the 3rd day,he saw the man coming with the dog. Stallone explained why he sold the dog and begged for the dog back. The man refused. Stallone offered him $100. The
man refused. He offered him $500. And the guy refused. Yes,he refused even $1000. And,Believe it or Not,Stallone had to pay $15,000 for the same,same dog he sold at $25 only! And he
finally got his dog back!

And today,the same Stallone who slept in the streets and sold his dog JUST BECAUSE he couldn't even feed it anymore,is one of the GREATEST Movie Stars who ever walked the Earth!

Being broke is BAD. Really BAD. Have You ever had a dream? A wonderful dream? But You are too broke to implement it? Too tiny to do it? Too small to accomplish it? Damn! I've been there too many times!

Life is tough. Opportunities will pass you by,just because you are a
NOBODY. People will want your products but NOT YOU. Its a tough
world. If you ain't already famous, or rich or "connected", You will find it rough.

Doors will be shut on You. People will steal your glory and crash your hopes. You will push and push. And yet NOTHING WILL HAPPEN.

And then your hopes will be crashed. You will be broke. Damn broke. You will do odd jobs for survival. You will be unable to feed yourself. And Yes, you may end up sleeping in the streets.
It happens. Yes, it does.

You, Keep Dreaming. Even when they crush your hopes, Keep Dreaming. Even when they turn you away, Keep Dreaming.
Even when they shut you down, Keep Dreaming.

NO ONE KNOWS WHAT YOU ARE CAPABLE OF EXCEPT YOURSELF! People will judge You by HOW you look. And by WHAT You have.
But please, Fight on! Fight for Your place in history. Fight for your glory. NEVER EVER GIVE UP!

Even if it means selling all your clothes and sleeping with the dogs, ITS OKAY! But AS LONG AS YOU ARE STILL ALIVE, Your STORY IS NOT OVER. TRUST ME.

Keep Up the Fight. Keep your dreams and hope alive. Go great .

Like and share if inspired. Lovely day people!

got bent (mild cheezed off vibes) (s.clover), Monday, 13 July 2015 04:15 (three years ago) Permalink

sly sounds like a piss-poor negotiator. great role model.

Gorefest Frump (Doctor Casino), Monday, 13 July 2015 05:03 (three years ago) Permalink

i mean i guess he did get his movie made and all that, but $15,000 for a dog, how did he let the guy talk him up that high, smdh

Gorefest Frump (Doctor Casino), Monday, 13 July 2015 05:03 (three years ago) Permalink

at the prestigious
Oscar Awards.

2011’s flagrantly ceremonious rock-opera (Bananaman Begins), Monday, 13 July 2015 08:01 (three years ago) Permalink

one month passes...

the origin of your name thing


nomar, Monday, 24 August 2015 14:12 (three years ago) Permalink

The origin of the name Aimless is a matter of historic record.

Aimless, Monday, 24 August 2015 18:23 (three years ago) Permalink

three months pass...

Tis the season for buying homeless people meals or hugging sad cashiers and posting that shit to social media so that everyone knows how wonderful you are.

Kiarostami bag (milo z), Monday, 7 December 2015 20:47 (three years ago) Permalink

one month passes...

this is better for that 77 thread but i'm not on 77 anymore so


nomar, Thursday, 28 January 2016 22:01 (two years ago) Permalink

"friends day" videos

nomar, Thursday, 4 February 2016 16:01 (two years ago) Permalink

A friend of mine did a long series of selfies with Shaq Soda cans, and a good chunk of his friends day video was made up of that.


how's life, Thursday, 4 February 2016 18:33 (two years ago) Permalink

haha that is a+

Flamenco Drop (VegemiteGrrl), Thursday, 4 February 2016 20:39 (two years ago) Permalink

i saw my friends day video and i didn't recognize two of the people, also one of the photos was of david bowie and another one was of a painting of a dog.

nomar, Thursday, 4 February 2016 20:44 (two years ago) Permalink

two weeks pass...

i don't have the right thread for this. my friend, who is a very straight-shooting matter of fact person just had a baby with his wife (this is their first). he posted the facebook album of photos of course, and the album is titled "New Child" and this just keeps cracking me up.

Option ARMs and de Man (s.clover), Saturday, 20 February 2016 23:59 (two years ago) Permalink

and now something that belongs on this thread

There once was a little boy who had a bad temper. His father gave him a bag of nails and told him that every time he lost his temper, he must hammer a nail into the back of the fence.

The first day the boy had driven 37 nails into the fence. Over the next few weeks, as he learned to control his anger, the number of nails hammered daily gradually dwindled down. He discovered it was easier to hold his temper than to drive those nails into the fence.

Finally the day came when the boy didn't lose his temper at all. He told his father about it and the father suggested that the boy now pull out one nail for each day that he was able to hold his temper. The days passed and the young boy was finally able to tell his father that all the nails were gone.

The father took his son by the hand and led him to the fence. He said, "You have done well, my son, but look at the holes in the fence. The fence will never be the same. When you say things in anger, they leave a scar just like this one. You can put a knife in a man and draw it out. It won't matter how many times you say I'm sorry, the wound is still there."

The little boy then understood how powerful his words were. He looked up at his father and said "I hope you can forgive me father for the holes I put in you."

"Of course I can," said the father.

It's not always anger, it is your actions in general. There are no "fresh starts" in life. There is no new beginning. Forgiveness comes easy for many people but the scars of the past, they never go away. Watch what you do today, because sometimes the price isn't worth the reward.

Option ARMs and de Man (s.clover), Sunday, 21 February 2016 08:16 (two years ago) Permalink

It's not always anger, it is your actions in general.

I'm standing motionless in a locked room until the end of time

kinder, Sunday, 21 February 2016 10:41 (two years ago) Permalink

"Son, as a reward for not losing your temper today, I am making you go pry nails out of a fence."

a little too mature to be cute (Aimless), Sunday, 21 February 2016 18:08 (two years ago) Permalink


Kiarostami bag (milo z), Friday, 4 March 2016 07:57 (two years ago) Permalink

one month passes...

just saw someone share an old World News Daily Report item entitled SAUDI ARABIA: FAMOUS RACEHORSE TO BE EXECUTED FOR BEING HOMOSEXUAL and comment "Brass Eye level of stupidity"


reader, if you love him so much why don't you marry him? (DJ Mencap), Monday, 18 April 2016 18:48 (two years ago) Permalink

ex coworker just went through some kind of bad breakup, posting like 20 of these aday :/


Flamenco Drop (VegemiteGrrl), Monday, 18 April 2016 19:23 (two years ago) Permalink

A first grade teacher was having trouble with one of her students. One day she asked Johnny what his problem was he replied, “I’m too smart for the first grade, my sister is in the third grade and I’m smarter than her too.”
The teacher took him to the principal’s office and explained the situation to the principal. The principal told her that he would give Johnny a test, and if he failed to answer one question he would have to go back to the first grade and be quiet. The teacher and Johnny both agreed.
Principal: “What is 3 x 3?”
Johnny: “9.”
Principal: “6 x 6?”
Johnny: “36.”
And so it went on like this, the principal asked him every question a third grader should know. Finally after about an hour he told the teacher “I see no reason Johnny can’t go to the third grade, he answered all of my questions right.”
The teacher asked if she could ask him some questions. The principal and Johnny agree.
Teacher: “What does a cow have 4 of that I only have 2 of?”
Johnny: “Legs”
Teacher: “What do you have in your pants that I don’t have?”
The principal gasps but before he can stop him from answering Johnny says, “Pockets.”
Teacher: “What does a dog do that a man steps into?”
Johnny: “Pants.”
Teacher: “What starts with F and ends with K and means a lot of excitement?”
Johnny: “Firetruck.”
The principal breaths a big sigh of relief and says “Put Johnny in the fifth grade, I got the last 4 questions wrong myself.”

Kiarostami bag (milo z), Tuesday, 19 April 2016 01:13 (two years ago) Permalink

A dog does.... pants?

never ending bath infusion (Doctor Casino), Tuesday, 19 April 2016 02:11 (two years ago) Permalink

Dogs pant

she started dancing to that (Finefinemusic), Thursday, 21 April 2016 03:50 (two years ago) Permalink

dog-pants joke depends on excluding the subject of the sentence ("It pants" would convey the sense more clearly + spoil the joke) which I can see feeling somehow incomplete or incorrect, grammatically, but in the context of "answering a trick question" I let it slide

weird how such processes happen completely 'under the radar' -- until something goes wrong & communication breaks down (cf Heidegger on the ontological status of tools)

bernard snowy, Thursday, 21 April 2016 04:01 (two years ago) Permalink

...why am i explaining jokes to people on ilx, instesad of laughing at jokes in another 30-minute netflix comedy program?

bernard snowy, Thursday, 21 April 2016 04:46 (two years ago) Permalink

"instesad: the app for when you would prefer to be sad instead

bernard snowy, Thursday, 21 April 2016 04:47 (two years ago) Permalink


thanks both of you. yeah i get the joke now but once it failed to land it just got stuck in the throat as it were.

never ending bath infusion (Doctor Casino), Thursday, 21 April 2016 12:27 (two years ago) Permalink

six months pass...

please stop with this hilarious Mass thing

Het schaduwkabinet reshuffle (seandalai), Thursday, 27 October 2016 20:08 (two years ago) Permalink

seven months pass...

how tf am I still seeing people posting/being tagged in shitty ads for discounted Ray-Bans on facebook in 2017?

[I know it's unintentional but come on]

kinder, Friday, 9 June 2017 19:00 (one year ago) Permalink

one month passes...

That's horrible. I feel bad for the ellipses.

El Tomboto, Saturday, 22 July 2017 14:18 (one year ago) Permalink

five months pass...

haven't been on facebook properly for ages. decided to start posting again to keep in touch with friends and family with whom i wouldn't otherwise keep in touch. now in an argument with some 'be nice to tories otherwise they won't vote for you' centrist bullshit friends. :/

Fizzles, Wednesday, 3 January 2018 21:07 (eleven months ago) Permalink

if by "being nice", they meant don't carve your initials in their backside with a razor, or waterboard them, or repeatedly slap them about the face and head, then your centrist friends have a valid point and are not entirely out of line, imo.

otoh, if they meant do not challenge tories when they talk nonsense, or spout racism/sexism, or cite non-existent 'facts' or blatantly incorrect 'history', or merely indulge in mean-spiritedness, then fuck 'em.

A is for (Aimless), Wednesday, 3 January 2018 22:58 (eleven months ago) Permalink

tbh aimless i think this was the crux of the argument. i wasn't so sure about the initials on the backside or the slapping i'm afraid.

Fizzles, Wednesday, 3 January 2018 23:04 (eleven months ago) Permalink

i mean wasn’t so sure about them being bad.

Fizzles, Wednesday, 3 January 2018 23:10 (eleven months ago) Permalink

five months pass...

Is there a way to change your visibility settings so it doesn't show everyone when you're going to an event? I find FB helpful to keep track of what shows I'm going to but I don't like that it clutters up peoples' feeds every time I add a danged event.

Simon H., Tuesday, 26 June 2018 14:08 (five months ago) Permalink

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