Why do I hate that thing (excluding image macros) that people put on facebook? Why am I such a jerk?

Universal Energy

http://s11.postimg.org/uxaj5pk4j/noize.png

http://www.worthytoshare.com/he-told-his-loving-wife-he-wants-a-divorce#

isn't that one a mainstay of this/other Facebook threads? It's so utterly bizarre

i confess i didn't pay enough attention to this thread to have seen it before

well more that I'm sure it's been doing the rounds for ages! and people must still be posting it!
BUT WHY

oh i understand. i don't know! it's not even remotely sense-making!

I still see it at least once a year, and it makes no more sense now than it did the first time I trudged through it.

so someone shared a video of animals being killed at a factory farm and then captioned it "Don't watch!!!"

http://www.tickld.com/x/zach-galifianakis-might-have-been-the-funny-guy-but-this-is-amazing

^ why you hate that?

because i am such a jerk

There's an image-story thing going around about how Zach Galifianakis, and starts with "Zach Galifianakis Might Have Been The Funny Guy As The One Man..." and I was really hoping it was a Clickhole parody that would go on to detail everything crappy and un-funny he's done since then. Unfortunately it's about him being a hero to a homeless person.

http://www.tickld.com/x/zach-galifianakis-might-have-been-the-funny-guy-but-this-is-amazing

― flatizza (harbl), Saturday, September 6, 2014 12:22 PM (Yesterday) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

^ why you hate that?

― Aimless, Saturday, September 6, 2014 1:03 PM (Yesterday) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

because i am such a jerk

― flatizza (harbl), Saturday, September 6, 2014 3:39 PM (Yesterday) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

There's an image-story thing going around about how Zach Galifianakis, and starts with "Zach Galifianakis Might Have Been The Funny Guy As The One Man..." and I was really hoping it was a Clickhole parody that would go on to detail everything crappy and un-funny he's done since then. Unfortunately it's about him being a hero to a homeless person.

― Doctor Casino, Sunday, September 7, 2014 2:28 PM (17 minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

trenchant social commentary?

hahaha ok totally missed that, i don't read urls anymore btw, ilx should display all HTML as a series of images in a long vertical strip

john mclaughlin video where he says in not these exact words but man the world sucks cos musos don't get paid mad money for playing arse backwards jazz noodling. govt funds orchestras therefore govt must fund jazz.
i mean, can you imagine?
of course jazz noodlers & musos think the world should lap up their solipsistic widdling for $$$ for their entire life span, so cries of "hear hear!", "tell it like it is!" abound.

SOMEONE. MAKE IT STOP.

http://imgur.com/a/eTtNu?gallery

http://i.imgur.com/dj2PBmA.jpg

huh, this guy went to my high school (but I didn't know him personally). feel like imgur glurge should be its own thread.

http://elitedaily.com/sports/30-things-can-tell-boyfriend-based-nfl-team-supports/760163/

i want to send that into outer space so aliens can find it and judge us for what we truly are

Samantha Perez · Cheney, Washington
So not true. And really. Seahawks fans are not loyal most are not real fans. The ones that are loyal are Cowboys fans we will always be fans no matter what happens. You need to get you facts right before stereotype fans

13 PROBLEMS WITH PORK

1) A pig is a real garbage gut. It will eat anything including urine, excrement, dirt, decaying animal flesh, maggots, or decaying vegetables. They will even eat the cancerous growths off other pigs or animals.

2) The meat and fat of a pig absorbs toxins like a sponge. Their meat can be 30 times more toxic than beef or venison.

3) When eating beef or venison, it takes 8 to 9 hours to digest the meat so what little toxins are in the meat are slowly put into our system and can be filtered by the liver. But when pork is eaten, it takes only 4 hours to digest the meat. We thus get a much higher level of toxins within a shorter time.

4) Unlike other mammals, a pig does not sweat or perspire. Perspiration is a means by which toxins are removed from the body. Since a pig does not sweat, the toxins remain within its body and in the meat.

5) Pigs and swine are so poisonous that you can hardly kill them with strychnine or other poisons.

6) Farmers will often pen up pigs within a rattlesnake nest because the pigs will eat the snakes, and if bitten they will not be harmed by the venom.

7) When a pig is butchered, worms and insects take to its flesh sooner and faster than to other animal's flesh. In a few days the swine flesh is full of worms.

Swine and pigs have over a dozen parasites within them, such as tapeworms, flukes, worms, and trichinae. There is no safe temperature at which pork can be cooked to ensure that all these parasites, their cysts, and eggs will be killed.

9) Pig meat has twice as much fat as beef. A 3 oz T bone steak contains 8.5 grams of fat; a 3 oz pork chop contains 18 grams of fat. A 3 oz beef rib has 11.1 grams of fat; a 3 oz pork spare rib has 23.2 grams of fat.

10) Cows have a complex digestive system, having four stomachs. It thus takes over 24 hours to digest their vegetarian diet causing its food to be purified of toxins. In contrast, the swine's one stomach takes only about 4 hours to digest its foul diet, turning its toxic food into flesh.

11) The swine carries about 30 diseases which can be easily passed to humans. This is why God commanded that we are not even to touch their carcase (Leviticus 11:8).

12) The trichinae worm of the swine is microscopically small, and once ingested can lodge itself in our intestines, muscles, spinal cord or the brain. This results in the disease trichinosis. The symptoms are sometimes lacking, but when present they are mistaken for other diseases, such as typhoid, arthritis, rheumatism, gastritis, MS, meningitis, gall bladder trouble, or acute alcoholism.

13) The pig is so poisonous and filthy, that nature had to prepare him a sewer line or canal running down each leg with an outlet in the bottom of the foot. Out of this hole oozes pus and filth his body cannot pass into its system fast enough. Some of this pus gets into the meat of the pig.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Purity_and_Danger

Hmm, bacon.

That list perfectly explains why every civilization that allowed pigs to be cultivated and eaten disappeared from the earth long ago. And why there are so many rattlesnakes nowadays.

Oh man that pig list...

PIGS ARE FILTHY ANIMALS

THIS IS WHY I LOVE LIVING IN CALIFORNIA *heart emoticons*

(Uploads photo of smoggy sunset over a concrete industrial area wasteland)

#myview #nofilter

This is one of the SADDEST stories ever told in Hollywood. His name is Sylvestar Stallone. One of the BIGGEST and Most famous American Movie superstars. Back in the day,Stallone was a
struggling actor in every definition. At some point,he got so broke that he stole his wife's jewellery and sold it. Things got so bad that he even ended up homeless. Yes,he slept at the New York bus station for 3 days. Unable to pay rent or afford food. His lowest point came when he tried to sell his dog at the liquor store to any
stranger. He didnt have money to feed the dog anymore. He sold it at $25 only. He says he walked away crying.

Two weeks later,he saw a boxing match between Mohammed Ali and Chuck Wepner and that match gave him the inspiration to write the script for the famous movie,ROCKY. He wrote the
script for 20 hours! He tried to sell it and got an offer for $125,000 for the script. But he had just ONE REQUEST. He wanted to STAR in
the movie. He wanted to be the MAIN ACTOR. Rocky himself. But the studio said NO. They wanted a REAL STAR.

They said he "Looked funny and talked funny". He left with his script. Afew weeks later,the studio offered him $250,000 for the script. He refused. They even offered $350,000. He still refused. They wanted his movie. But NOT him. He said NO. He had to be
IN THAT MOVIE.

After a while,the studio agreed,gave him $35,000 for the script and let him star in it! The rest is history! The movie won Best Picture,Best Directing and Best Film Editing at the prestigious
Oscar Awards. He was even nominated for BEST ACTOR! The Movie ROCKY was even inducted into the American National Film Registry as one of the greatest movies ever!

And do You know the first thing he bought with the $35,000? THE DOG HE SOLD. Yes,Stallone LOVED HIS DOG SO MUCH that he stood at the liquor store for 3 days waiting for the man he sold
his dog to. And on the 3rd day,he saw the man coming with the dog. Stallone explained why he sold the dog and begged for the dog back. The man refused. Stallone offered him $100. The
man refused. He offered him $500. And the guy refused. Yes,he refused even $1000. And,Believe it or Not,Stallone had to pay $15,000 for the same,same dog he sold at $25 only! And he
finally got his dog back!

And today,the same Stallone who slept in the streets and sold his dog JUST BECAUSE he couldnt even feed it anymore,is one of the GREATEST Movie Stars who ever walked the Earth!

Being broke is BAD. Really BAD. Have You ever had a dream? A wonderful dream? But You are too broke to implement it? Too tiny to do it? Too small to accomplish it? Damn! I've been there too many times!

Life is tough. Opportunities will pass you by,just because you are a
NOBODY. People will want your products but NOT YOU. Its a tough
world. If you aint already famous,or rich or "connected",You will find it rough.
Doors will be shut on You. People will steal your glory and crash your hopes.You will push and push. And yet NOTHING WILL HAPPEN.

And then your hopes will be crashed.You will be broke. Damn broke. You will do odd jobs for survival. You will be unable to feed yourself. And Yes,you may end up sleeping in the streets.
It happens. Yes,it does.

BUT NEVER LET THEM CRUSH THAT DREAM. Whatever happens to
You,Keep Dreaming. Even when they crush your hopes,Keep Dreaming. Even when they turn you away,Keep Dreaming.
Even when they shut you down,Keep Dreaming.

NO ONE KNOWS WHAT YOU ARE CAPABLE OF EXCEPT YOURSELF! People will judge You by HOW you look. And by WHAT You have.
But please,Fight on! Fight for Your place in history. Fight for your glory. NEVER EVER GIVE UP!

Even if it means selling all your clothes and sleeping with the dogs,ITS OKAY! But AS LONG AS YOU ARE STILL ALIVE,Your STORY IS NOT OVER. TRUST ME.

Keep Up the Fight. Keep your dreams and hope alive. Go gerrit.

Like and share if inspired. Lovely day

https://fbcdn-sphotos-a-a.akamaihd.net/hphotos-ak-xpa1/v/t1.0-9/1045227_541386092565547_926500796_n.jpg?oh=9b3970fb30ba7d8831a18795a9741d13&oe=54BBA482&__gda__=1425356017_17d36022e4d5e90d39bb20ad951b109f

"cup the balls"

http://i.imgur.com/EJR5jjk.png

that's silly how would the bull know what the badge meant

I feel like there's a thread where this kind of thing is specifically discussed, but this bozo in Chicago is apparently the wellspring for a lot of this kind of garbage: http://www.newyorker.com/magazine/2015/01/05/virologist.

Here's one of his most popular sites: http://www.givesmehope.com/top

'emerson spartz' is a spectacular name

https://scontent-a-lga.xx.fbcdn.net/hphotos-xap1/v/t1.0-9/10906445_938717226146798_7862944924018863832_n.jpg?oh=6e9eb1062ad9d286acf27ec8d8598242&oe=553B39DB

(David Cross voice)
"Oh my god, they poisoned your kids, I'm so sorry for your loss that's devastating!"
"Well they're not dead."
"Oh, thank god! I guess the hospital was able to save them?"
"Well, we didn't go to the hospital."
"You didn't?! But what did you do?"
"What do you mean?"
"What did you do when they poisoned your kids?"
etc.

When I read 'monsanto' I always think of it as ChristoPHA Moltisanti

wtf

https://fbcdn-sphotos-c-a.akamaihd.net/hphotos-ak-frc3/v/t1.0-9/1011984_702053226479772_1482281856_n.jpg?oh=5690b078088aed24275e2d67d5f5438c&oe=55228E18&__gda__=1429474663_4c39cd493db0b5b2e7f989ccba54df24

"not everyone has to change the world" -Emerson Spartz

*cough*thisistheexcludingimagemacrosthread*cough*

Spartz left before dessert, which he called “a low return on investment, calorically.”

there are several arguable money lines in this piece but I think this is my favourite

https://www.facebook.com/events/396739940484143/?source=1

https://scontent-iad3-1.xx.fbcdn.net/hphotos-xpf1/v/t1.0-9/734408_10152043380938602_1748414695_n.jpg?oh=0aaf710ffd4cdc4f777739415870096f&oe=55FA06B5

whoops wrong thread

This is one of the SADDEST stories ever told in Hollywood. His name is Sylvestar Stallone. One of the BIGGEST and Most famous American Movie superstars. Back in the day, Stallone was a
struggling actor in every definition. At some point, he got so broke that he stole his wife's jewellery and sold it. Things got so bad that he even ended up homeless. Yes, he slept at the New York bus station for 3 days. Unable to pay rent or afford food. His lowest point came when he tried to sell his dog at the liquor store to any
stranger. He didn't have money to feed the dog anymore. He sold it at $25 only. He says he walked away crying.

Two weeks later,he saw a boxing match between Mohammed Ali and Chuck Wepner and that match gave him the inspiration to write the script for the famous movie,ROCKY. He wrote the script for 20 hours! He tried to sell it and got an offer for $125,000 for the script. But he had just ONE REQUEST. He wanted to STAR in
the movie. He wanted to be the MAIN ACTOR. Rocky himself. But the studio said NO. They wanted a REAL STAR.

They said he "Looked funny and talked funny". He left with his script. A few weeks later,the studio offered him $250,000 for the script. He refused. They even offered $350,000. He still refused. They wanted his movie. But NOT him. He said NO. He had to be
IN THAT MOVIE.

After a while,the studio agreed,gave him $35,000 for the script and let him star in it! The rest is history! The movie won Best Picture, Best Directing and Best Film Editing at the prestigious
Oscar Awards. He was even nominated for BEST ACTOR! The Movie ROCKY was even inducted into the American National Film Registry as one of the greatest movies ever!

And do You know the first thing he bought with the $35,000? THE DOG HE SOLD. Yes,Stallone LOVED HIS DOG SO MUCH that he stood at the liquor store for 3 days waiting for the man he sold
his dog to. And on the 3rd day,he saw the man coming with the dog. Stallone explained why he sold the dog and begged for the dog back. The man refused. Stallone offered him $100. The
man refused. He offered him $500. And the guy refused. Yes,he refused even $1000. And,Believe it or Not,Stallone had to pay $15,000 for the same,same dog he sold at $25 only! And he
finally got his dog back!

And today,the same Stallone who slept in the streets and sold his dog JUST BECAUSE he couldn't even feed it anymore,is one of the GREATEST Movie Stars who ever walked the Earth!

Being broke is BAD. Really BAD. Have You ever had a dream? A wonderful dream? But You are too broke to implement it? Too tiny to do it? Too small to accomplish it? Damn! I've been there too many times!

Life is tough. Opportunities will pass you by,just because you are a
NOBODY. People will want your products but NOT YOU. Its a tough
world. If you ain't already famous, or rich or "connected", You will find it rough.

Doors will be shut on You. People will steal your glory and crash your hopes. You will push and push. And yet NOTHING WILL HAPPEN.

And then your hopes will be crashed. You will be broke. Damn broke. You will do odd jobs for survival. You will be unable to feed yourself. And Yes, you may end up sleeping in the streets.
It happens. Yes, it does.

BUT NEVER LET THEM CRUSH THAT DREAM. Whatever happens to
You, Keep Dreaming. Even when they crush your hopes, Keep Dreaming. Even when they turn you away, Keep Dreaming.
Even when they shut you down, Keep Dreaming.

NO ONE KNOWS WHAT YOU ARE CAPABLE OF EXCEPT YOURSELF! People will judge You by HOW you look. And by WHAT You have.
But please, Fight on! Fight for Your place in history. Fight for your glory. NEVER EVER GIVE UP!

Even if it means selling all your clothes and sleeping with the dogs, ITS OKAY! But AS LONG AS YOU ARE STILL ALIVE, Your STORY IS NOT OVER. TRUST ME.

Keep Up the Fight. Keep your dreams and hope alive. Go great .

Like and share if inspired. Lovely day people!

sly sounds like a piss-poor negotiator. great role model.

i mean i guess he did get his movie made and all that, but $15,000 for a dog, how did he let the guy talk him up that high, smdh

at the prestigious
Oscar Awards.

the origin of your name thing

:|