nick sylvester = maker upper

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Can we start a betting pool and predict when Nick will post next to ILM? Will it be on this thread?

NoTimeBeforeTime (Barry Bruner), Thursday, 2 March 2006 18:44 (eighteen years ago) link

http://www.jefframirez.com/ilx/drudge..jpg

account settings (account), Thursday, 2 March 2006 18:47 (eighteen years ago) link

if Nick posts on this thread it will balloon to 4000 posts and be auto-bookmarked at the top of New Answers.

midi sanskrit (sanskrit), Thursday, 2 March 2006 18:51 (eighteen years ago) link

Also at least 5 people posting here will spontaneously cum.

Dan (You Know It's True) Perry (Dan Perry), Thursday, 2 March 2006 18:52 (eighteen years ago) link

Will keep a lookout for him tonight on CNN.

Edward III (edward iii), Thursday, 2 March 2006 18:53 (eighteen years ago) link

which ones tho

ham'ron (dubplatestyle), Thursday, 2 March 2006 18:53 (eighteen years ago) link

if Pitchfork reports this in their daily news section, space/time will rupture and Chicago will swallow itself.

midi sanskrit (sanskrit), Thursday, 2 March 2006 18:58 (eighteen years ago) link

It'll be easy to find out after the fact -- the people who mysteriously drop out of the thread for the five minutes following Nick's post are the ones cleaning the splooge off their keyboards.

xpost

NoTimeBeforeTime (Barry Bruner), Thursday, 2 March 2006 18:58 (eighteen years ago) link

Breaking news: Liars change name to Maker Uppers

Edward III (edward iii), Thursday, 2 March 2006 19:01 (eighteen years ago) link

the title of this thread deserves an award

don weiner (don weiner), Thursday, 2 March 2006 19:06 (eighteen years ago) link

I want to know whether the VV commissioned a piece from NS (his choice of topic), or this particular type of story.

i don't think they commission pieces from him, as he's on staff. that said, the blogger who is quoted heavily in the piece is claiming that she pitched them this very piece back in january.

maura (maura), Thursday, 2 March 2006 19:12 (eighteen years ago) link

ah shit, that first line was supposed to be italed.

maura (maura), Thursday, 2 March 2006 19:13 (eighteen years ago) link

Gothamist: "The entire piece read like a press release for the book-- when we read it, we wondered how much money Nick Sylvester was taking to sneak it into the magazine."

StanM (StanM), Thursday, 2 March 2006 19:14 (eighteen years ago) link

I just looked up the Dem Franchize Boyz interview to see what Ethan was getting the vapors over. I thought it was pretty funny. Does that make me racist?

Mickey (modestmickey), Thursday, 2 March 2006 19:18 (eighteen years ago) link

lady if you have to ask

s1ocki (slutsky), Thursday, 2 March 2006 19:20 (eighteen years ago) link

By DAVID B. CARUSO=
Associated Press Writer=

NEW YORK The Village Voice suspended one of its editors
after he admitted fabricating material for this week's cover story,
a look at ``The Secret Society of Pickup Artists.''
The weekly alternative newspaper published an editor's note on
its Web site Wednesday night announcing the suspension of senior
associate editor Nick Sylvester.
In an article about the effect that Neil Strauss's book, ``The
Game,'' has had on the singles scene, Sylvester closed with a
description of a night in which he and three television writers
from Los Angeles tested strategies for picking up women at a
Manhattan bar.
``That scene,'' the Voice wrote, ``never happened.''
It attached a note from Sylvester, in which he said the account
was ``a composite of specific anecdotes'' shared by two of the
alleged participants. One of the people supposedly present, the
comedy writer Steve Lookner, wasn't involved at all, Sylvester
acknowledged.
``I deeply regret this misinformation, and I apologize to
Lookner for his distress, which I certainly never intended,''
Sylvester wrote.
Voice Managing Editor Doug Simmons said the paper was still
reviewing the accuracy of the rest of the story and planned to
publish a second statement in its next edition.
Simmons declined to comment further on the matter. He said
Sylvester, who also writes for the online music magazine Pitchfork,
joined the Voice staff in 2005.
Attempts to reach Sylvester were not immediately successful. He
did not return an e-mail message sent to him at Pitchfork Media.
Sylvester predominantly wrote music reviews for the Voice. His
few full-length feature articles included several interviews with
characters who told somewhat fantastical stories.
In an August story about cheating on college campuses, Sylvester
described interviewing a student who spent $500,000 to have a
multiplication table tattooed over his entire body; a Harvard
Medical School graduate who cheated with Morse code; a Boston
College junior named Simeon Criz who cheated using a specially
designed deck of playing cards; and a Manhattan doctor named Noam
Feldstein who delivers ``a hundred newborn babies each day.''
Boston College said it had no record of a student named Simeon
Criz. The board that licenses doctors in New York said it had no
record of a physician named Noam Feldstein.
Founded in 1955, the Voice covers arts, entertainment and news
with an irreverent bent that often stretches the conventions that
govern most big-city newspapers. Its staffers have won three
Pulitzer prizes.

Howard Kurtz, Thursday, 2 March 2006 19:27 (eighteen years ago) link

We blew it, Caitlin.

Tracer Hand (tracerhand), Thursday, 2 March 2006 19:31 (eighteen years ago) link

Simeon Criz and Noam Feldstein to thread.

fritz (Fritz), Thursday, 2 March 2006 19:35 (eighteen years ago) link

ahahahahha:

http://www.villagevoice.com/arts/0531,education7,66455,12.html

Education Supplement Fall 2005
Crib Sheet Confidential
Class clowning: Inside the shadowy world of 'retro-cheating'
by Nick Sylvester
August 2nd, 2005 1:06 PM

Ever since Back to School, the shocking 1986 film in which college's oldest living freshman, Rodney Dangerfield, pays Kurt Vonnegut to write his term paper on, conveniently, Kurt Vonnegut, students at American universities have been cheating on tests, homework, papers—literally anything they can. Over time a fast-paced game of cat and mouse has developed between career-driven students who will do anything to get ahead and the university professors who go to great lengths to defeat cheaters and uphold academic honesty.

The cats are winning. By the end of the 2003–04 academic calendar, nearly all popular methods of hi-tech cheating, including pocket Game Genie Scantron decoders and the Bluetooth wireless true-false bra, had been stamped out. Plagiarism virtually ceased when Internet search technology allowed professors to scour for tracts too similar.

Campus buzz across the country reveals that while universities spend their resources combating hi-tech cheating, students are taking lessons from the ghosts of Cheating Past, embracing low-tech cheating in unprecedented numbers and reminding their stodgy professors what it really means to "walk like an Egyptian": Cheat.

The ancient Egyptians were arguably the world's first and best cheaters—and today's slackers are raiding their tombs for tricks. Just as pharaohs would tattoo secret messages onto the scalps of messengers—the text then concealed by their grown-out hair—students across the country are turning to the tat as the next big cheat.

Scientific equations seem to be the most popular at the moment, students opting for tattoos with the most long-term value and breadth of application. Tattoo parlors consulted for this piece all cite inside-arm tattoos of the quadratic equation as the street favorite, with full-stomach tattoos of the Periodic Table of Elements as the second, though infinitely more painful, most popular option.

"Science is sexy," says Colin Klein, a college student, "but it's also very useful." Klein's tattoo, a multiplication table that covers his entire body, took 10 years and over $500,000 to complete—you do the math.

But not all tattoo cheaters are in it for the long run. "Down my left arm I got a list of 30 adjectives," explains Simon Moerder, a student at a well-known American university who's using tattoos to take the GRE at the end of the summer. "Down my right arm I got another list of adjectives—except they're antonyms. So when the test people look at my arms, they see art. But when I look at my arms, I see answers."

Tattoos are expensive, however, so the dusty return of Morse code to Cheat University comes as no surprise. The fast-paced language of beeps and held tones allows for cheap, relatively undetectable in-classroom "team-cheating," as popularized by the notorious State College High School "Clickz N Cutz" homework gang in 1987. Morse code also allows for transatlantic cheating, an option heretofore forgotten by most cheaters on test day.

"I don't know how I would have gotten through med school if it weren't for Morse code," says Dr. Conrad Boccuti, a recent Harvard Med grad whose real name has been changed so his patients don't sue him. Medical students are often under intense pressure; Morse code cheating is nearly essential, even after a degree is conferred. "Click click click, clap clap, long-clap—you see, I just told that man over there he has herpes."

A lot of cheaters complain that their art has lost its sense of mystique; Boston College junior Simeon Criz aims to reclaim exactly that. "Everybody hates magicians because they cheat," he notes, "but everybody loves cheaters who do magic tricks." Criz recently designed a deck of playing cards that, instead of diamonds, spades, clubs, and hearts as suits, has A, B, C, D—all possible answer choices for a test.

"When the teacher comes up to me during a test and says, 'Hey, you're playing cards when you should be taking the test," I tell him to pick a card. Then he picks a card. A quarter of the time that card's got the right answer on it."

But how long will the new tricks last? University officials remain confident they can thwart the latest wave of cheating, already coined retro-cheating, without attacking students' personal liberties. "If I see a tattoo made of letters, or that kid with the cards, or an Egyptian, I'll probably do something," assures an unnamed college provost. "I'll probably kill somebody."

And lastly, what ever happened to the good old-fashioned crib sheet? Does anyone still use them?

"Never leave home without one," admits Dr. Noam Feldstein, an OB-GYN at a Manhattan hospital who delivers close to a hundred newborn babies each day. "That's why they call them crib sheets," he explains. "Right, like I'm going to deliver your baby without a little cheating."

Sterling Clover (s_clover), Thursday, 2 March 2006 19:37 (eighteen years ago) link

Oh my.

Whiney G. Weingarten (whineyg), Thursday, 2 March 2006 19:38 (eighteen years ago) link

is it unethical to "investigate" a clearly satirical fake piece? or just stupid?

Sterling Clover (s_clover), Thursday, 2 March 2006 19:38 (eighteen years ago) link

"If I see a tattoo made of letters, or that kid with the cards, or an Egyptian, I'll probably do something," assures an unnamed college provost. "I'll probably kill somebody."

god nick pulled one over on us there!!!

Sterling Clover (s_clover), Thursday, 2 March 2006 19:39 (eighteen years ago) link

vv ain't worth reading these days, is it

gear (gear), Thursday, 2 March 2006 19:41 (eighteen years ago) link

it still has apartment ads!!!

maura (maura), Thursday, 2 March 2006 19:41 (eighteen years ago) link

TWAIN 3000, yo

senseiDancer (sexyDancer), Thursday, 2 March 2006 19:41 (eighteen years ago) link

The AP story is unfair (or maybe just dense) to imply that the cheat-sheet story was anything other than transparently made-up. but if the voice was cool with that one, maybe that's why nick thought it would be OK to do something similar in the latest story.

Fritz Wollner (Fritz), Thursday, 2 March 2006 19:42 (eighteen years ago) link

serious, David Caruso at the AP, how can you go from King of New York to dissing an article that mentions blue-tooth wireless true false bras. That's like, sub Jade.

Dan Selzer (Dan Selzer), Thursday, 2 March 2006 19:43 (eighteen years ago) link

that's a really funny article

s1ocki (slutsky), Thursday, 2 March 2006 19:45 (eighteen years ago) link

a Boston College junior named Simeon Criz who cheated using a specially designed deck of playing cards;

the method:


Criz recently designed a deck of playing cards that, instead of diamonds, spades, clubs, and hearts as suits, has A, B, C, D—all possible answer choices for a test.

"When the teacher comes up to me during a test and says, 'Hey, you're playing cards when you should be taking the test," I tell him to pick a card. Then he picks a card. A quarter of the time that card's got the right answer on it."

AP in non-possession of basic math skills shocker?

NoTimeBeforeTime (Barry Bruner), Thursday, 2 March 2006 19:45 (eighteen years ago) link

trife, where was that dem franchise boyz thing? i couldn't find it....

M@tt He1geson (Matt Helgeson), Thursday, 2 March 2006 19:49 (eighteen years ago) link

http://www.thephoenix.com/OnTheDownload/PermaLink.aspx?guid=29600206-8f44-44f5-b2ae-f016ce0d6f2c

Lie defector: Voice blogger accused of telling the truth

(This story was removed from online editions of the Boston Phoenix.)

Lie defector: Voice blogger accused of telling the truth

By Carly Carioli and Matt Ashare

The Village Voice yesterday suspended serial fabriactor Nick "Riff Raff" Sylvester, after it was revealed that elements of a cover story he wrote this week were actually true.

Allegations of truth in Sylvester's writing sent shockwaves through the blogosphere, where Sylvester, a former Harvard Lampoon staffer and Pitchforkmedia.com editor, was widely loved and loathed for his humorous "fictional" interviews with semi-famous musicians on his blog, "Riff Central." On the basis of these so-called "fake" interviews — and perhaps on the basis of an article or two in the pages of the Boston Phoenix — Sylvester was hired last year as the Voice’s chief music blogger, reprising his schtick under the heading "Riff Raff."

"I wish to apologize to the Voice's readers," Sylvester wrote in a tersely-worded statement published Wednesday on the newspaper's web site. "I invented only about one-third of this week's cover story — which was about how girls won't date some dudes I know because they've already heard all the pickup lines we stole from Neil Strauss's book The Game, which we all bought because we thought it was actually about G-Unit. The other two-thirds of the story were the product of factual reporting. I deeply regret this information."

In what might have been the day's most shocking revelation, Sylvester also admitted that all his past "fake" interviews had in fact been real. It turns out that the Hair Police song "Not Raft But Cage" really is the sound of "two gorillas . . . shitting into their own microphone." The Ying Yang twins really did almost change the words to "Wait (The Whisper Song)" from "Ay bitch, wait’ll you see my dick" to "Hey, where’d my dick go?" And both of Ariel Pink’s parents write for Desperate Housewives.

Several Voice colleagues who wished to remain anonymous hinted that there have been newsroom complaints in recent months that Sylvester was "coasting" — going to actual concerts, conducting verifiable interviews, and writing diligent criticism instead of making funny shit up like he was supposed to.

Indeed, it appears that Sylvester's slide down the slippery slope toward the truth in print began even before he arrived at the Voice. It was assumed by Phoenix editors that the "cult folk singer Vashti Bunyan" was a figment of Sylvester’s fertile satiric imagination. But this week the Phoenix's research department turned up disturbing evidence that not only is Bunyan a real person, but she actually came out of retirement to record with Animal Collective.

Sylvester's editors at the Voice were dumbfounded. "We thought we had a really talented liar on our hands," said Voice music editor Chuck Eddy, "but it turns out the kid just lucked out and had a funny chat with the Game."

"We used to say to ourselves, 'You just can't make stuff like this up,' " said Pazz and Jop grand poobah Robert Christgau. "Turns out we were right."

DOWNLOAD: AC/DC's "Riff Raff" at Buddyhead.

lovelylurrrker, Thursday, 2 March 2006 19:53 (eighteen years ago) link

Fall from grace or New Times turmoil fallout? You be the judge!

http://thephoenix.com/article_ektid4211.aspx

Edward III (edward iii), Thursday, 2 March 2006 19:54 (eighteen years ago) link

trife, where was that dem franchise boyz thing? i couldn't find it....
-- M@tt He1geson (matt@blah) March 2nd, 2006 2:49 PM.

http://www.villagevoice.com/blogs/riffraff/archives/2006/02/dem_franchize_b.php
the topper is the comments from folks like "I hate rap" egging him on.

Alex in Baltimore (Alex in Baltimore), Thursday, 2 March 2006 20:01 (eighteen years ago) link

One of the things you say in the song, gangsters don't dance--is that true you think?

Well, some gangstas don't. They just lean wit it, rock wit it. They might just set in one place, moving back and forth or moving side to side--or leaning and rocking.

It just seems like gangsters would want to dance. Like, you're a gangster--dance.

gear (gear), Thursday, 2 March 2006 20:04 (eighteen years ago) link

reassert that hierarchy, yo

gear (gear), Thursday, 2 March 2006 20:06 (eighteen years ago) link

he should have asked something along these lines:

I hate that we live in the shadow of "Lean Back." It's OK to dance guys: it's supposed to indicate how well you fuck. Why are you afraid of showing that?

ham'ron (dubplatestyle), Thursday, 2 March 2006 20:07 (eighteen years ago) link

Dance gangster monkey!

Edward III (edward iii), Thursday, 2 March 2006 20:08 (eighteen years ago) link

Thanks for going there, Ed.

Dan (Think Before You Post, People) Perry (Dan Perry), Thursday, 2 March 2006 20:12 (eighteen years ago) link

I'm suddenly reminded of a 1994 Snoop interview in Select that went something like this:

Select: What about the whole murder/gang/violence allegations surrounding you?

Snoop: That don't matter. Like if I pulled a gun on you right now, you'd be scared, right?

Select: Possibly.

Snoop: But if I dropped a rhyme right now, you'd love me?

Select: Perhaps.

Snoop: Do you wanna hear me bust a rhyme right now?

Select: No.

NoTimeBeforeTime (Barry Bruner), Thursday, 2 March 2006 20:13 (eighteen years ago) link

xpost
margaritas all around.

Sterling (Yeah, Like You Always Do) Clover (s_clover), Thursday, 2 March 2006 20:14 (eighteen years ago) link

I can always be counted on to pierce the veil of sensible behavior.

But really, that's the subtext that upsetting people.

Edward III (edward iii), Thursday, 2 March 2006 20:14 (eighteen years ago) link

you think?

Sterling (No Shit!) Clover (s_clover), Thursday, 2 March 2006 20:14 (eighteen years ago) link

Sterling, shouldn't you be somewhere adding threads to your delete fantasy wishlist?

Edward III (edward iii), Thursday, 2 March 2006 20:18 (eighteen years ago) link

thx for the link alex.

now i get it.

that interview was bad.

M@tt He1geson (Matt Helgeson), Thursday, 2 March 2006 20:36 (eighteen years ago) link

that dem franchise boys link doesn't work for me, can someone cut & paste it?

Fritz Wollner (Fritz), Thursday, 2 March 2006 20:40 (eighteen years ago) link

do Harvard Lampoon folks typically end up in prominent press/writing gigs that don't involve comedy? it never really seemed to me like he was interested in writing much that wasn't satire or somehow tongue-in-cheek, although I never really thought he was that funny either (ok, we get it, Tony Yayo wears a bucket hat, etc). I'm less confused about the Voice holding him to serious journalistic standards than I am that the fake Riff Central interviews apparently convinced somebody that he should be able to interview people for real and be all kooky and "Kaufman-esque" about it. I don't know him and have a few mutual friends so I try not to pass judgement but in that context dude comes off like a dick for real.

Alex in Baltimore (Alex in Baltimore), Thursday, 2 March 2006 20:40 (eighteen years ago) link

To go along with the music, Dem Franchize Boyz have invented a dance, the "Lean Wit It, Rock Wit It" (video here), which also happens to be a song on their new album, On Top of Our Game. I got one of the Boyz on the phone yesterday to talk about the dance's popularity, and the future of snap.

I want to talk about the dance.

What's going on.

Just the dance.

What about it.

It's the best dance I've ever seen.

We're trendsetters.

Did this come to you in a dream?

No it came from the "White Tee" song. That's what we used to do around the neighborhood. I like to think I added a twist to it, came over the song and everything, and the rest is history. It is what it is.

That's awesome. But why lean wit it first and then rock wit it? Why not rock wit it first?

Because in the dance you lean first, then you rock wit it.

So you're saying it would look pretty funny if you rock first.

Yeah it would look funny if you rock first.

Who's the best at this dance?

Parlae outta the Franchize.

How about among your friends, who's the best?

Oh yeah! Friends, fans, celebrities, athletes, everybody's doing it their own sexy little way. Ain't no exact way to do it. You do it how you want.

Right, like if you want to rock wit it first.

Add your little flavor to it.

Jermaine Dupri is probably pretty bad at this dance.

Oh yeah! He got his own little flavor. That's what I'm trying to tell you. Parlae do it the best.

Do you think the Lean Wit It Rock Wit It is better than the Macarena?

I mean, yeah. You really got to get sweaty, but if you want to get sweaty, you can.

One of the things you say in the song, gangsters don't dance--is that true you think?

Well, some gangstas don't. They just lean wit it, rock wit it. They might just set in one place, moving back and forth or moving side to side--or leaning and rocking.

It just seems like gangsters would want to dance. Like, you're a gangster--dance. Do you have any dances in the works for gangsters?

It just came about. In "White Tee", we were leaning and rocking. Folks started catching on. So Parlae figured out: Name the dance and perfect it, and expose it to the world.

People are calling your dance the Electric Slide of the South.

It's something like that.

Other people are calling it Atlanta's hokey-pokey.

Atlanta's hokey-pokey.

Yeah.

I ain't gonna agree with no hokey-pokey.

Snap music is big now; what's the next snap?

What's the next snap?

Do you think people will start slapping each other on the butt?

Excuse me?

What's the next snap?

If it ain't broke don't fix it.

darin (darin), Thursday, 2 March 2006 20:44 (eighteen years ago) link

Two things that bother me.

1) Nick is now the effigy of the Village Voice for everyone who wants to take a shot at them. This has been picked up for national dailies via the AP.

2) In more Shattered Glass parallels, everyone wants to play the cool snoop role and dig up the huge conspiracy a la Caruso's AP story, which ends with:

In an August story about cheating on college campuses, Sylvester described interviewing a student who spent $500,000 to have a multiplication table tattooed over his entire body; a Harvard Medical School graduate who cheated with Morse code; a Boston College junior named Simeon Criz who cheated using a specially designed deck of playing cards; and a Manhattan doctor named Noam Feldstein who delivers "a hundred newborn babies each day."

Boston College said it had no record of a student named Simeon Criz. The board that licenses doctors in New York said it had no record of a physician named Noam Feldstein.

They're playing themselves in the movie of this in their minds.

Chris Ott (Chris Ott), Thursday, 2 March 2006 20:49 (eighteen years ago) link

xpost holy shit that interview is appalling

geoff (gcannon), Thursday, 2 March 2006 20:54 (eighteen years ago) link

I don't get the "satire," even in the obviously false story about student cheaters. It reads like an attempt to replicate the exact tone and modulations of a certain kind of breathless, know-it-all New York Magazine or NY Observer article. And I agree with some here that it is very very well done. But to what end? Isn't satire supposed to reveal something?

xpost: But who WOULDN'T want to be Peter Sarsgaard in that movie?? Even if he does look exactly like Chloe Sevigny.

One your 1), Chris, yes, that's what happens when you create situations out of whole cloth and run them as fact. Your publication's reputation takes a big fucking hit. This is about much more than NS now.

Tracer Hand (tracerhand), Thursday, 2 March 2006 20:54 (eighteen years ago) link


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