Does anyone still shop at HMV?

On a typical day, Lex, how do you not die?

on a typical die i actually find myself asking myself that at least three times. i have no idea.

Like, what have you eaten today? How do you manage to shower and wash and stuff without poisoning yourself? Do you have a driving license?

today i have eaten

- a bowl of muesli
- a pear
- brie on pumpkinseed ryvita (this went wrong btw)

i actually made myself proper coffee in the grinder my bf got me for xmas, though (this only went wrong insofar as i spilled the coffee beans everywhere, also i have no idea how much of anything to put in and i think it was way too strong and i'm kind of gibbering at my desk right now)

of course i can't fucking drive. i ran 13k yesterday though!

how...how...how...does cheese on ryvita go...wrong

To be fair, he's eating a lot more healthily than I am.

the ryvita broke as i was trying to put the cheese on and it all fell on the floor :(

he tried to do it cheese first
xxp

my beautiful thread

(Also, I missed the point when this thread on HMV became a thread on sandwiches and the life skills of the lex... what happened?)

i bought myself one of those sainsbury "cook for yourself" meals yesterday because it was reduced, it was basically like...pre-packaged ingredients except you have to use a pot instead of a microwave? that went wrong and i panicked and my housemate had to help me salvage it

every time i see this thread i think of the rahzel lyric

Check the outlets for cassettes and CD
Sam Goody, Blockbustin' up your H M V

xp because nick insists on TROLLING me about cooking

For breakfast I fried two tomatoes, some slices of chorizo, and an egg, and had it on a slice of white toast, which I had to slice lengthways from a baguette-thing that we'd used the bottom of last night for chilli-loaf.

For lunch I had a crusty roll dipped in leftover chilli from the chilli-loaf.

For dinner I'm going to make some fake oven chips and have them with frozen scampi. A lazy Friday tea.

On Wednesday night I made leeky mashed potato which we had with mustard lamb (neck fillet seasoned with ground mustard seeds; ground myself in my pestle and mortar); made a gravy with some flour, a glass of white wine, a teaspoon of mint sauce, and the juices from the lamb in the frying pan. It was amazing. (Jamie fat-tongued-cunt Oliver recipe.)

(The chilli was vege, and homemade from scratch, of course.)

No one is born with an innate cooking gene, but anyone can learn to cook if shown the right way. I struggled for years randomly throwing ingredients into pans and then having to force down the resultant slop of inconsistent parts before someone actually showed me how to chop an onion, crush a garlic clove and deseed a pepper (all of which are very easy things to do and you won't end up stabbing or setting fire to yourself in the proceeds, I promise).
Lex, really I know you're against cooking in all forms but would it hurt to maybe get a 'how to cook a bolognese' 101 off of Suzy or someone? It's really simple, requires very very little in the way of preparation and tells you a whole bunch of things on how to cook other meals. And besides, the results can be really rewarding. I'm not shitting you here.

Once I saw two neighbor kids, brothers, fighting. One of them socked the other on the arm, ran in the house and locked the back door. The other one went to the door and started beating on it, on the glass instead of the frame. Eventually his hand went through the glass and he laid down and started screaming at the blood. The mother gathered them both up and headed for the hospital. Even though the kid with the cut was beyond stupid, practically developmentally disabled, for beating on the glass instead of the door frame, he won because he got all the attention. The end.

Xposts Recipe books can be helpful, but really it's easier just to watch and learn with someone who can show you how.

I dunno, if lex is relatively healthy and hates cooking and doesn't mind his current diet, he doesn't have to learn how to cook.

dude should have taken door banging 101

my bf loves cooking and makes me seafood chowder, beef wellington, home-made pasta &c &c &c on the regular. whenever i watch him it doesn't make me think i can do it, it makes me think cooking is even more like magic than ever and i am in slight awe because i could never get the ingredients to do that, ever. also, i hate the process.

also, william c is such a fucking cunt. hope someone socks you in the face for it irl soon :)

o_O

Xpost to lex Fair dos. I probably couldn't make a beef wellington, a seafood chowder perhaps if I had a recipe and spent a long time on it. These seem like relatively advanced meals to make. My point is though that cooking skills aren't just given out at birth, but I guess you might have to want to learn before you do. Still, having at least one meal you can cook, even with a recipe book, is a life skill I think everyone should know.

yes and mine is a bowl of muesli

I've made a Wellington before (with ready made pastry, mind). Not that hard.

what's worse, lex's inabiltiy cook or sick mouthy LETTING US KNOW HE DONT BUY THE READY MADE SHIT

Chili con carne and mayonnaise. That's worse.

what's worse, lex's inabiltiy cook or sick mouthy LETTING US KNOW HE DONT BUY THE READY MADE SHIT

it's a close call actually, nick has really come storming out of the traps and may yet take the title of most irksome in a tangent wherein he had no right to do so.

I make my own curry pastes.

Wife, meanwhile, Lex-like, claims to have "never made a satisfactory sandwich".

"wife". This has sitcom written all over it.

"My Lex Next Door"

Japes ahead as Internet personalities Lex and Sick Mouthy realise they are real life partners.

Ian The Lex eats egg sandwiches but cannot make them. Ian Sick Mouthy can make egg sandwiches but cannot eat them. They are married in a civil ceremony and one of them inherits a sandwich shop. With hilarious consequences.

ease up on the lex, who cares if he cant cook? I know i cant cook either. Its the most normal thing in the world for a guy!

...for a guy?

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v165/noodle_vague/salt_n_pepa.jpg

haha

i stick up for lex and i get embroiled in sexism now. shut up pfunkboy shut up

yes

Dude, you're defending someone who says he can't put cheese on a biscuit without it going wrong.

well i hate cheese!

Yeah, but you could put it on a biscuit surely?

And you can work a toaster without thinking it's magic?

ok you got me there

i can make spaghetti bolognese and work an oven

YOU ARE A MAGICIAN

fry and boil eggs. george foreman grill. make a steak pie. ok i can cook a bit

HMV: Retailer Game confirms it wants to buy some stores
HMV HMV's troubles are linked to a failure to cope with increasing competition
Continue reading the main story

Retailer Game has revealed that it is one of the 50 separate groups or individuals who have expressed an interest in buying all, or part of HMV.

Game has asked HMV's administrators, accountancy firm Deloitte, about the possibility of purchasing an undisclosed number of HMV stores.

HMV went into administration on Tuesday of this week.

The music, DVD and games retailer has 223 UK stores in total, and a workforce of about 4,000.

According to reports, Game, which itself exited administration in April of last year, could bid for up to 45 HMV locations.

Game, which sells computer games and consoles, is owned by private equity group OpCapita.

Deloitte said that the 50 parties interested in buying all or part of HMV included other retailers, private equity firms, and wealthy individuals.

Retail restructuring firm Hilco, which owns unconnected HMV Canada, is also said to be one of the 50.

HMV's administration follows after the company failed in recent years to cope with increasing competition from online rivals, the supermarkets, and illegal music and film downloads.

oh yeah http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/business-21092853