So I woke up early and went to the ArcLight for the 11:15 show.Now I left my parking ticket in the car. I realized this as I got out of the elevator on the first floor. You see Iād been scrounging for my energy bars in my automobile and forgot all about the parking ticket, which you need, otherwise youāre going to get charged up the yin-yang.
And on the way back up I got off on the wrong floor. You see the stairs were closed for repairs. And I started to get antsy, was I gonna miss part of the movie? Iām like Woody Allen, Iāve got to start at the beginning, otherwise Iām convinced Iāve missed something.
Then I see people who are obviously going to the ArcLight. So I put it in high gear, I donāt want to wait in line for a ticket. I pass people on the escalators, and I ran up to the counter just before a woman and her two little kids and purchased my ducat and immediately went to the bathroom. Thatās right, Iām old, what are the odds I can sit through a three hour picture without peeing? Pretty low.
Actually, Iād had nothing to drink in the morning, I was prepared.
And when I entered the theatre, a big one, #1, I saw the usual beshirted usher ready to give the ArcLight rap. But she didnāt, because I was the only person in the theatre. She said when big movies open, sometimes they start āem at 9 AM and nobody is there, so this wasnāt the biggest surprise to her, but it was to me.
So Iād picked one seat from center, so I moved over.
And then I realized I was looking up ever so slightly, so I went to the row behind, and then the sound was a bit softer, so I went back to the prior row. I know, itās OCD, but really, the lower row was better. And Iām constantly checking my pockets to make sure Iāve got all my gear. And itās then that I realizeā¦
Iāve lost my wallet.
Oh boy. You mean I killed myself to get here on time and now Iām gonna miss some of the movie to look? Hell, maybe Iāll just wait until the end, someone will turn it in, but will I be calm during the show?
No.
There are only two trailers at the ArcLight. At least that used to be the pitch, I havenāt been in a long time, I havenāt been in eons, because itās just too much of a hassle. I plan, and then when Iām there I wish I wasnāt, my mind canāt slow down.
So Iām standing by the exit, waiting to seeā¦ AND THEREāS A THIRD TRAILER!
I rush out to the ticket-taker, has anybody turned in a wallet?
No. But he said lost and found was handled by the concession.
So I walked over and interrupted a man pulling popcorn, but he didnāt have it either.
I went to the bathroom.
Gone.
And now Iām starting to flip. Forget the money, itās the credit cards and IDs Iām worried about.
And the trailer is still going, so I whip out the flashlight on my iPhone and look for said wallet beneath the seats in my row and the row behind.
No go, itās not there.
Now Iām starting to freak, this doesnāt add up, so I retrace my steps from the first of my rows to the second, and on the edge of the concrete, in the row behind, there it is.
So, I could be calm during the film.
― difficult listening hour, Wednesday, 2 October 2019 00:10 (four years ago) link