Whose over-the-top Grammy performance will make the least sense this year?

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No Doubt's drummer just drummed his way out of a giant barrel, if that's any indicator.

― Curt1s St3ph3ns, Monday, 24 February 2003 01:14 (twenty-three years ago)

Gwen Stefani sounded horrible but had on great boots, so I excuse it all.

I'm more confused as to why Simon & Garfunkle were deemed by Dustin Hoffman (?! Why is he there?) as the epitome of everything. What does it mean?

― Ally (mlescaut), Monday, 24 February 2003 01:18 (twenty-three years ago)

I'm more confused as to why Simon & Garfunkle were deemed by Dustin Hoffman (?! Why is he there?) as the epitome of everything.

It took me a while to realize he was there because of the connection to The Graduate. Still -- what a boring anti-climax to start the Grammys. I blame Sony-CBS synergy.

― Michael Daddino (epicharmus), Monday, 24 February 2003 01:25 (twenty-three years ago)

OMIGOD! Kylie and Justin!

― Michael Daddino (epicharmus), Monday, 24 February 2003 01:26 (twenty-three years ago)

OMIGOD i lost that i forgot grammys was today. damn anyway sony will probably rerun a few times

― Chupa-Cabras (vicc13), Monday, 24 February 2003 01:28 (twenty-three years ago)

Just turned it on. How does anyone with a pair of ears enjoy Faith Hill?

― Alex in NYC (vassifer), Monday, 24 February 2003 01:31 (twenty-three years ago)

Paul Schaeffer *IS* Velvet Jones in the Year 3000!

― Michael Daddino (epicharmus), Monday, 24 February 2003 01:38 (twenty-three years ago)

I'd like to see Vanessa Carlton naked.....but she's singing out of tune.

― Alex in NYC (vassifer), Monday, 24 February 2003 01:40 (twenty-three years ago)

Good lord, John Mayer is embarassing. Why does he do that to his face while singing? I'm cringing on his behalf.

― Alex in NYC (vassifer), Monday, 24 February 2003 01:44 (twenty-three years ago)

Haha this banter is so bad!

― Jody Beth Rosen (Jody Beth Rosen), Monday, 24 February 2003 01:49 (twenty-three years ago)

And of course, Mayer just won. Yep, off to a great start...

― Jesse Fox, Monday, 24 February 2003 01:50 (twenty-three years ago)

Guess who's back.

― Jody Beth Rosen (Jody Beth Rosen), Monday, 24 February 2003 01:52 (twenty-three years ago)

John Mayer makes me want to kill people, in particular John Mayer.

Eminem looks like he's on the verge of tears, what the hell?

― Ally (mlescaut), Monday, 24 February 2003 01:52 (twenty-three years ago)

Ally, your post is a wonderland.

― Jody Beth Rosen (Jody Beth Rosen), Monday, 24 February 2003 01:54 (twenty-three years ago)

Eminem looks like he's on the verge of tears, what the hell?

He always looks like that, doesn't he? I don't get it. He's funny in his music, but it's like he never even smiles in public. Of course, neither does Dustin Hoffman...

― Jesse Fox, Monday, 24 February 2003 01:57 (twenty-three years ago)

ARRGH JODY THAT WAS SO EVIL. My nickname in grade school was Allison Wonderland - could this influence my John Mayer hatred? Probably.

― Ally (mlescaut), Monday, 24 February 2003 01:59 (twenty-three years ago)

are sheryl crow and kid rock performing their song!?!?!?

― reo fordecor, Monday, 24 February 2003 02:06 (twenty-three years ago)

Remind me again why you people hate Coldplay?

― Jody Beth Rosen (Jody Beth Rosen), Monday, 24 February 2003 02:19 (twenty-three years ago)

That performance wasn't reminder enough?

― Ally (mlescaut), Monday, 24 February 2003 02:23 (twenty-three years ago)

OH MY GOD. That PCS commercial with Little Richard was the greatest performance at the Grammys so far.

― Ally (mlescaut), Monday, 24 February 2003 02:27 (twenty-three years ago)

I take that back as Harvey Fierstein and Rod Stewart just walked out. I never expected something so surreal from the Grammys.

― Ally (mlescaut), Monday, 24 February 2003 02:31 (twenty-three years ago)

durn I wanted "Complicated"

― Aaron A., Monday, 24 February 2003 02:33 (twenty-three years ago)

She knocked over the mic stand! Definitely punk...

― Jesse Fox, Monday, 24 February 2003 02:37 (twenty-three years ago)

This is funny, because I don't have any TV channels, but I like the idea of people commenting while the program is still on, so I keep flipping back to this thread to see what's happening and I think I'm surprised in a way I'd never be if I were really watching it. (I also don't know what most of the people sound like, but I'm just imagining that).

― tom (other one), Monday, 24 February 2003 02:41 (twenty-three years ago)

Alternative Music Album: "A Rush of Blood to the Head," Coldplay.

Female Rock Vocal Performance: "Steve McQueen," Sheryl Crow (news).

Male Rock Vocal Performance: "The Rising," Bruce Springsteen (news).

Rock Performance by a Duo or Group with Vocal: "In My Place," Coldplay.

Metal Performance: "Here to Stay," Korn.

Rock Instrumental Performance: "Approaching Pavonis Mons by Balloon (Utopia Planitia)," The Flaming Lips.

Rock Song: "The Rising," Bruce Springsteen (Bruce Springsteen).

Rock Album: "The Rising," Bruce Springsteen.

Flaming Lips win a grammy!! Woohoo!!!

― Donnie Brat, Monday, 24 February 2003 02:44 (twenty-three years ago)

God. Nelly. Ughhh...

Just close your eyes and think of all the tuxedoed baby boomers in that audience noddin' they heads to Nelly at this very moment.

― Jay Vee (Manon_70), Monday, 24 February 2003 02:46 (twenty-three years ago)

If the folks behind the Grammys really wanted to make the show more FUN and SPONTANEOUS and APPEALING TO THE YOUF MARKET, they could do no worse than getting rid of all those awkward medleys. Here's one song I'm nominated for! And here's the other song I'm nominated for!

Oooh...too soon with the pyrotechnics, you know?

― Michael Daddino (epicharmus), Monday, 24 February 2003 02:49 (twenty-three years ago)

Fred Durst: "This war should go away as soon as possible."

― Aaron A., Monday, 24 February 2003 02:49 (twenty-three years ago)

we're tape delayed so john mayer just won, he looks like a grown-up version of kevin arnold.

― keith (keithmcl), Monday, 24 February 2003 02:50 (twenty-three years ago)

Ooh, tough crowd for Robin Williams. But no crowd could ever be tough enough.

― Michael Daddino (epicharmus), Monday, 24 February 2003 02:59 (twenty-three years ago)

Fred Durst was so adorable. "The war is bad! Heavy metal is good!"

I have come to believe that singing brings Bruce Springsteen intense pain, because there's no other explanation for that face he always makes when he sings.

― Ally (mlescaut), Monday, 24 February 2003 03:01 (twenty-three years ago)

I have to make a confession. I have -- seriously -- found "The Rising" really moving, no doubt for all the reasons Bruce intended, yet I also can't listen to it without thinking he's singing "COME ON UP FOR VERIZON."

― Michael Daddino (epicharmus), Monday, 24 February 2003 03:03 (twenty-three years ago)

I'd like to see Vanessa Carlton naked.....but she's singing out of tune.

She is obviously the most punk of all.

― original bgm, Monday, 24 February 2003 03:03 (twenty-three years ago)

Verizon sucks ass, I hate them with all of my wonderland body. I wish them pestulence.

― Ally (mlescaut), Monday, 24 February 2003 03:05 (twenty-three years ago)

Oh, Miss Badu. Oh.

― teeny (teeny), Monday, 24 February 2003 03:14 (twenty-three years ago)

More war commentary, from Ja Rule: in this time of terrorism, we should all be thankful for...Ashanti.

― Jesse Fox, Monday, 24 February 2003 03:18 (twenty-three years ago)

The announcer just promised "an Eminem you'd never thought you'd see." Well, that explains Harvey Fierstein's presence, then.

― Michael Daddino (epicharmus), Monday, 24 February 2003 03:21 (twenty-three years ago)

Or maybe it's Em + Springsteen. Horrible either way.

― Michael Daddino (epicharmus), Monday, 24 February 2003 03:23 (twenty-three years ago)

Ed Bradley intro'ing the Bee Gees? Explanation, please!

― Michael Daddino (epicharmus), Monday, 24 February 2003 03:25 (twenty-three years ago)

NEVER BEEN SO FUCKING GLAD NOT TO BE WATCHING TV: ME!

― Anthony Miccio (Anthony Miccio), Monday, 24 February 2003 03:28 (twenty-three years ago)

Cum On Up Yer Verizon!

― Anthony Miccio (Anthony Miccio), Monday, 24 February 2003 03:28 (twenty-three years ago)

I like Fred Durst's "less war, more heavy metal" speech better than Ja Rule's. Though Ja wins points for wearing a military-themed outfit. That was a special touch.

What, Mike, Ed Bradley can't like the Bee Gees?

Eminem is going to come out and cry and scream all emo-style.

OH GOD NSYNC'S BEE GEES TRIBUTE MAKES ME WISH I WAS DEAD.

― Ally (mlescaut), Monday, 24 February 2003 03:29 (twenty-three years ago)

Waitm I thought N'SYNC at least could sing!

― Aaron A., Monday, 24 February 2003 03:30 (twenty-three years ago)

The best thing was how INTO IT Justin was doing the beatbox. I mean, his head damn near flipped off his body, he was bopping it so hardcore. He is streets, fools.

― Ally (mlescaut), Monday, 24 February 2003 03:32 (twenty-three years ago)

Best thread of the year, and it's never made me gladder that I have no cable at all.

Remind me again why you people hate Coldplay?

Because their music should be the soundtrack to their own strangulation.

He is streets, fools.

Can a Timberlake/Mike Skinner collaboration be in the cards?

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Monday, 24 February 2003 03:34 (twenty-three years ago)

See, I don't need to watch the Grammys because Ally and Mike's commentary is better than watching.

― Nicole (Nicole), Monday, 24 February 2003 03:36 (twenty-three years ago)

Why is everyone singing off-key? Coldplay are the only ones so far who have been on pitch. Does someone with experience in this type of thing have insight?

― teeny (teeny), Monday, 24 February 2003 03:36 (twenty-three years ago)

See, I don't need to watch the Grammys because Ally and Mike's commentary is better than watching.

Damn straight. I want you two to host next year.

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Monday, 24 February 2003 03:37 (twenty-three years ago)

I'm still thinking about Harvey Fierstein/Rod Stewart. Why was Harvey dressed like that? Why did Rod Stewart have that chihuahua? What did Robin Williams have to do with it? None of it computed, it was like for 5 glorious minutes, "The Birdcage" threw up on the Grammys, then it was back to Norah Goddamned Jones.

― Ally (mlescaut), Monday, 24 February 2003 03:38 (twenty-three years ago)

Perhaps Eminem is going to do a medley of Chicago songs.

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Monday, 24 February 2003 03:39 (twenty-three years ago)

Skipping 172 messages at this point... Click here if you want to load them all.

PEOPLE! Aretha Franklin does the world's best imitation of the Stay-Puft Marshmallow man and no one has anything to say????

I also can't believe that Joei and I are the only ones who say that dancer fall. And the NSync performance showed two things:

1. Justin Timberlake sucks ass.
2. Chris Kirkpatrick kicks ass.

― Dan Perry (Dan Perry), Monday, 24 February 2003 16:56 (twenty-three years ago)

Addendum to the NSync again:

ATTENTION NSYNC: Fire Lance and hire me!!!!!!!! I'll put up with Justin, promise.

― Dan Perry (Dan Perry), Monday, 24 February 2003 16:57 (twenty-three years ago)

"What does Robert Hilburn know about rock and roll?"

The Negro Problem, "Birdcage."

― Neudonym, Monday, 24 February 2003 16:57 (twenty-three years ago)

Aretha Franklin does the world's best imitation of the Stay-Puft Marshmallow man and no one has anything to say????

What, she set her front on fire and loomed up over the building?

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Monday, 24 February 2003 16:57 (twenty-three years ago)

http://us.news1.yimg.com/us.yimg.com/p/rids/20030224/i/1046062530.3959791733.jpg

― Dan Perry (Dan Perry), Monday, 24 February 2003 17:00 (twenty-three years ago)

I like the part in the Grammy wrap where Matos outs Maurice Gibb's widow as "tearful."

― TMFTML (TMFTML), Monday, 24 February 2003 17:02 (twenty-three years ago)

my friend Jeanne sez she looks like a giant, scary wedding cake

James--ah. I only saw his round-up elsehwere in the paper

― M Matos (M Matos), Monday, 24 February 2003 17:03 (twenty-three years ago)

(feh on Dan's Justin hate, btw)

― M Matos (M Matos), Monday, 24 February 2003 17:04 (twenty-three years ago)

I still say Timberlake's pipes suck.

― James Blount, Monday, 24 February 2003 17:06 (twenty-three years ago)

She's clothed in a bedsheet? I wonder if its flammable.

― Chris V. (Chris V), Monday, 24 February 2003 17:06 (twenty-three years ago)

I just read Slate's roundup - did James Taylor actually perform "Sweet Baby James"? What the fuck was this - a DNC fundraiser?

― James Blount, Monday, 24 February 2003 17:08 (twenty-three years ago)

I still say he made a better album than any of the A-O-T-Y nominees. (it's better than that statement, though, obv.)

fave Hilburn comment so far: "There are those who have maintained for years that the Grammys are no more significant than American Idol...." [emphasis mine] Yeah, because American Idol has been on the air for an entire year!

― M Matos (M Matos), Monday, 24 February 2003 17:08 (twenty-three years ago)

That picture is awe-inspiring.

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Monday, 24 February 2003 17:11 (twenty-three years ago)

more Hilburn: "Eminem's rendition of 'Lose Yourself,' a song that urges young people to reach for their dreams, was one of the night's highlights -- with the Detroit rapper backed live by the Roots hip-hop band." yes! "the Roots hip-hop band!"

"His failure to win album of the year honors for The Eminem Show was the evening's most serious misjudgment." b-b-b-but what about "tasteful and gently understated" Norah Jones?!?!?

― M Matos (M Matos), Monday, 24 February 2003 17:12 (twenty-three years ago)

"For all the talk about honoring excellence, the Grammy Awards are one big sales-op for the record industry--a chance to generate enough buzz on artists to get consumers to actually buy their CDs." shocker!

― M Matos (M Matos), Monday, 24 February 2003 17:13 (twenty-three years ago)

Do you understand why I've moved beyond hate with him and just regard him as a old pathetic dog who pees everywhere?

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Monday, 24 February 2003 17:13 (twenty-three years ago)

From the NYT:
"Politik," the song by Coldplay (which won best alternative album and best rock performance by a duo or group), pointedly included the lines, "Give me peace of mind and trust/Don't forget the rest of us."

How do you pointedly include those lines? How do you do anything pointedly at all with them?

― Jesse Fox, Monday, 24 February 2003 17:13 (twenty-three years ago)

As pointed and sharp as a big sloppy enchilada.

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Monday, 24 February 2003 17:15 (twenty-three years ago)

great metaphor, Ned!

― M Matos (M Matos), Monday, 24 February 2003 17:18 (twenty-three years ago)

*bows*

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Monday, 24 February 2003 17:20 (twenty-three years ago)

I figured it out! Hilburn is the Paul Harvey of rockcrit! "We'll...talk again."

― M Matos (M Matos), Monday, 24 February 2003 17:32 (twenty-three years ago)

ARGH. But you're onto something there.

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Monday, 24 February 2003 17:34 (twenty-three years ago)

http://sportsmed.starwave.com/i/magazine/new/norah_jones_a.jpg

LAST KNOWN PHOTO

― jm (jtm), Monday, 24 February 2003 18:14 (twenty-three years ago)

Christopher Cross, the sequel.

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Monday, 24 February 2003 18:15 (twenty-three years ago)

Christopher Cross was popular until people found out what he looked like.

― TMFTML (TMFTML), Monday, 24 February 2003 18:17 (twenty-three years ago)

God, Alicia Keys should just shut the fuck up. Forever. All the other ingenues are fine by me.

― Arthur (Arthur), Monday, 24 February 2003 18:22 (twenty-three years ago)

It seems like all the platinum-selling rappers have The Roots on speed-dial just in case they have a live performance coming up and they actually want to RAWK.

One of these days The Roots will get to perform on one of these awards shows as The Roots. I hope.

― nickalicious (nickalicious), Monday, 24 February 2003 18:30 (twenty-three years ago)

That would be cool, but I like the idea of them insinuating themselves into the fabric of the music industry until you can't turn around without bumping into them.

― Dan Perry (Dan Perry), Monday, 24 February 2003 18:34 (twenty-three years ago)

The Roots : "chart rap" :: The Funk Brothers : Motown?

― nickalicious (nickalicious), Monday, 24 February 2003 18:39 (twenty-three years ago)

Aretha Franklin is Queen Frostine, the geriatric years. WHERE ARE HER GINGERBREAD SERVANTS PEASANTS.

― Ally (mlescaut), Monday, 24 February 2003 19:13 (twenty-three years ago)

Boy, am I out of the loop:

Shankar Thrilled With Jones' Grammy Wins

By NEELESH MISRA, Associated Press Writer

NEW DELHI, India - While Norah Jones' music is little known in most of India, her sweep at the Grammys brought a wave of pride and cheer to a home in southern New Delhi, where her father sat watching the awards ceremony.

Jones is the daughter of Ravi Shankar, the 82-year-old sitarist who's India's best known musician.

― david day (winslow), Monday, 24 February 2003 21:25 (twenty-three years ago)

No talk of Coldplay's drummer? He was like a three-year-old Meg White!

― Curt1s St3ph3ns, Monday, 24 February 2003 23:10 (twenty-three years ago)

Jones is the daughter of Ravi Shankar, the 82-year-old sitarist who's India's best known musician.

Norah Jones, meanwhile, is 23. YOU GO RAVI!

― Nate Patrin (Nate Patrin), Tuesday, 25 February 2003 00:05 (twenty-three years ago)

I was hoping for another harangue like last year's from the RIAA about how file-swapping is killing the industry... it just wasn't the same without the arrogant self-serving propaganda!

― Shakey Mo Collier, Tuesday, 25 February 2003 00:07 (twenty-three years ago)

Especially Springsteen, famously dismissed by Strummer for being (Lester Bangs' phrase) "a myth-addled softie."

The Clash were very wary of Elvis Costello, too, and moderatley miffed at Mick Jones when he colaborated with Elvi. At any rate, a quick listen to "Stay Free" and "Gates Of The West" shows how near Springsteen and the clash were in spirit, whether Strummer wanted to admit it or not.

On another note, I find it very hard to believe that Bruce "Nebraska" Springsteen and Elvis "Pills & Soap" Costello were trying to turn "London Calling" into a rah-rah USUK anthem.

Haha, Lester Bangs had some nerve to call anyone a "myth addled softie" (certainly the biggest part of Lester's appeal?)

― Daniel_Rf (Daniel_Rf), Tuesday, 25 February 2003 00:29 (twenty-three years ago)

jeez, am im i the first britisher on this thread? the grammy's seem so much more exciting than the brits don't they?

"They were thinking "oh no he'll drop Ja Rule off a balcony" ". this made me lol.

― michael wells (michael w.), Tuesday, 25 February 2003 01:40 (twenty-three years ago)

If Hemmer glowers at the camera one more time saying "the Boss was ROBBED!", I'm going to go buy a big bag of smack during lunch and off myself.

all he has to do is open his mouth for me to do the same.

― gabbneb (gabbneb), Tuesday, 25 February 2003 03:32 (twenty-three years ago)

* Fred Durst invents the word “agreeance"

I almost died when I heard this on the radio.

But shocker - Fred was right!

― gabbneb (gabbneb), Sunday, 2 March 2003 16:33 (twenty-three years ago)

As I think I said to Anthony once regarding Mr. Durst, even a blind, deaf and mute monkey with irreparable brain damage occasionally stumbles and falls onto a banana.

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Sunday, 2 March 2003 16:42 (twenty-three years ago)

And as I said to Ned about Fred Durst, that man is wiser than then we could ever conceive.

― Anthony Miccio (Anthony Miccio), Sunday, 2 March 2003 23:42 (twenty-three years ago)

I actually have several people to tell that agreeance is a word. I am ashamed for making fun of his use of "Agreeance" and will never doubt Fred again.

http://www.limpbizkit.com/uploaded_media/fred%281%29.jpg

― Anthony Miccio (Anthony Miccio), Sunday, 2 March 2003 23:45 (twenty-three years ago)

that man is wiser than then we could ever conceive

And since I cannot conceive, being male, that statement sounds like one we can both agree on in our own ways.

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Sunday, 2 March 2003 23:49 (twenty-three years ago)

think again!

http://i.imdb.com/Photos/Ss/0110216/1-2.jpg

― Anthony Miccio (Anthony Miccio), Sunday, 2 March 2003 23:51 (twenty-three years ago)

it's not a tumor!

― Anthony Miccio (Anthony Miccio), Sunday, 2 March 2003 23:54 (twenty-three years ago)

Alas, Mr. Miccio, you have confused real life with the movies. The little green man in the robe you have been talking to is not your Jedi mentor, but the disreputable superintendent of your building wondering 'where the hell's my rent, you sunovabitch?'

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Monday, 3 March 2003 00:14 (twenty-three years ago)

don't talk about my mom that way! She IS my Jedi Mentor!

― Anthony Miccio (Anthony Miccio), Monday, 3 March 2003 00:29 (twenty-three years ago)

though judging by this banter, Fred is smarter than anything WE could conceive.

― Anthony Miccio (Anthony Miccio), Monday, 3 March 2003 00:30 (twenty-three years ago)

well, you can't win 'em all.

― M Matos (M Matos), Monday, 3 March 2003 00:31 (twenty-three years ago)

Shucky-darn.

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Monday, 3 March 2003 00:32 (twenty-three years ago)

eleven months pass...

Revive!

― Curt1s St3ph3ns, Monday, 9 February 2004 00:49 (twenty-two years ago)

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