WANTED: musicians who play [X] who will leave and force us to revolve around the entire world switching members for that position

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WANTED: Bassist for arty multi-faceted rock/pop group. Name: Roxy Music

WANTED: *Clean* Guitarist for versatile and energetic celebrity funk rock band. Name: Red Hot Chili Peppers

― donut bitch (donut), Tuesday, 27 January 2004 22:07 (twenty-two years ago)

WANTED: Passionate and versatile lead vocalist for world famous metal/power ballad group. Please inquire Eddie. Name: Van Halen.

― donut bitch (donut), Tuesday, 27 January 2004 22:08 (twenty-two years ago)

WANTED: Dedicated dudes who like "jam" and can appreciate free form exploration. Please call David Brock at 555-....

― donut bitch (donut), Tuesday, 27 January 2004 22:12 (twenty-two years ago)

WANTED: Lead guitarist who will do as he's told and not demand publishing points Please contact Mick or Keith at [email protected]

― M@tt He1geson (Matt Helgeson), Tuesday, 27 January 2004 22:14 (twenty-two years ago)

WANTED: Musician who will play with me and make the sounds that aren't plinky skronky guitar bits. Respond to [email protected].

― Jordan (Jordan), Tuesday, 27 January 2004 22:15 (twenty-two years ago)

WANTED: Passionate and versatile lead vocalist for world famous metal/power ballad group. Please inquire Eddie. Name: Van Halen.

ANDREW WK!

― Eisbär (llamasfur), Tuesday, 27 January 2004 22:17 (twenty-two years ago)

ahem *versatile*

― donut bitch (donut), Tuesday, 27 January 2004 22:18 (twenty-two years ago)

WANTED: Lead guitarist who will do as he's told and not demand publishing points Please contact Mick or Keith at [email protected]

calling James Iha

― the surface noise (electricsound), Tuesday, 27 January 2004 22:18 (twenty-two years ago)

Wanted: Second guitarist and bass player wanted to play the notes that they are given and go on lucrative world tour. Note: Out-of-work ex-members of successful bands w/previous arena experience only. Contact [email protected].

(haha xpost)

― Jordan (Jordan), Tuesday, 27 January 2004 22:20 (twenty-two years ago)

WANTED: Rapper who can effortlessly string together profane non-sequiturs. No father to your style, etc. But you don't do crack, and preferably don't have a criminal record. Please contact RZA or Method Man at [email protected].

― Eisbär (llamasfur), Tuesday, 27 January 2004 22:20 (twenty-two years ago)

WANTED: Guitarist, bassist, and/or drummer(s) who want to cut all this bullshit and just have fun being a fully functioning normal band performing my songs, until I get quickly get bored with the social ups and downs of the band and pursue solo efforts. email: [email protected]

― donut bitch (donut), Tuesday, 27 January 2004 22:21 (twenty-two years ago)

would it be too offensive to do a mock-wanted ad for joy division immediately after ian died?

― Eisbär (llamasfur), Tuesday, 27 January 2004 22:24 (twenty-two years ago)

WANTED: Full band inc. bass, guitar, trumpet, trombone, sax, and multiple drummers wanted to get on down with the funky sound. Must obey orders and forfeit all songwriting credit. Contact [email protected].

― Jordan (Jordan), Tuesday, 27 January 2004 22:26 (twenty-two years ago)

Experienced pros will to put up with long recording sessions, riots, cancelled tours, unhinged insanity, verbal abuse, pref. with a love of classic Elton John, Aerosmith, and Nine Inch Nails. We are looking to record - contact Axl at [email protected]

― M@tt He1geson (Matt Helgeson), Tuesday, 27 January 2004 22:28 (twenty-two years ago)

WANTED: Lead singer willing to perform nude, to defecate and vomit on-stage (willingness to eat or throw said defecation and vomit preferable), mutilate audience members and self. No musical or vocal skills necessary, but other requirements MANDATORY. Serious inquiries only to [email protected].

― Eisbär (llamasfur), Tuesday, 27 January 2004 22:42 (twenty-two years ago)

wanted: ex-brit-pop types whose star has fallen somewhat, (oh and a line of disposable drummers) to watch ridiculously egocentric songwriter argue with his brother and spectacularly fail whilst attempting to regain past glories. Apply to [email protected]

― ailsa (ailsa), Tuesday, 27 January 2004 23:20 (twenty-two years ago)

Wanted: Musicians of skill to play in band. Must be used to being yelled at and sacked at the drop of a hat - abusive songs may be written about you later. Amphetamine users okay, but no potheads. Contact M.E. Smith at what'[email protected]

― Sasha (sgh), Tuesday, 27 January 2004 23:45 (twenty-two years ago)

(pssst, eisbar, I think you're missing the "revolving door" point of the thread)

― donut bitch (donut), Tuesday, 27 January 2004 23:48 (twenty-two years ago)

(i.e. New Order haven't been replacing lead singers all the time, nor, to my knowledge, have the Murder Junkies been regularly replacing their frontmen with dudes who rub themselves in poo... see?)

― donut bitch (donut), Tuesday, 27 January 2004 23:50 (twenty-two years ago)

WANTED: Guitar/bass player. Must enjoy video games, being overdubbed over, not releasing product, coming out of hiding once a year to play festivals, infuriating both welcome and unwelcome fan base in variying ways. Those allergic to fog need not apply. Contact [email protected]

― anode (anode), Tuesday, 27 January 2004 23:56 (twenty-two years ago)

anode, you could almost replace the [email protected] with [email protected] without having to rewrite...

― M@tt He1geson (Matt Helgeson), Wednesday, 28 January 2004 00:43 (twenty-two years ago)

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