Worst attempts by rappers to make their home locales sound interesting

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On the new Vinyl Dialect, Ezra refers to East Anglia as "EA". I would have gone with "TractorTown" or maybe "The Big Mustard".

― Dom Passantino (Dom Passantino), Wednesday, 14 April 2004 16:30 (twenty-two years ago)

I lived in Seattle during the heigh of Sir-Mix-A-Lot mania... still remember the lines "...from 14th and Yesler Way" and "King County cops are tough."

― Mark (MarkR), Wednesday, 14 April 2004 16:44 (twenty-two years ago)

U SUM KIND OF FAGET BA U DONT NO DA EA AKA DA ANGLES AKA DA EAST SIDE BA UR JUS A FAGET

CUM 2 FUKIN BURY ST EDMUNDS BA U FUKEN FAGET GET A SLAP WIT ON UR FUKIN FGET CHATTIN DATY TYPE SHIT BOUT EZRA

PEACE
1
BLIGGY AKA SANDER BOY FROM DA BSE

― BLIGGY AKA SANDER, Wednesday, 14 April 2004 16:49 (twenty-two years ago)

yeah

― 57 7th (calstars), Wednesday, 14 April 2004 17:06 (twenty-two years ago)

CUM 2 FUKIN BURY ST EDMUNDS BA U FUKEN FAGET GET A SLAP WIT ON UR FUKIN FGET CHATTIN DATY TYPE SHIT BOUT EZRA

Gross.

― David Allen (David Allen), Wednesday, 14 April 2004 17:10 (twenty-two years ago)

bury st. edmunds? wasn't that in an agatha christie novel?

― lauren (laurenp), Wednesday, 14 April 2004 17:18 (twenty-two years ago)

If Bliggy isn't being satirical then I may need to piss myself.

― noodle vague (noodle vague), Wednesday, 14 April 2004 17:22 (twenty-two years ago)

For some local rappaz, Baltimore, Maryland = Bodymore, Murderland.

― Lee G (Lee G), Wednesday, 14 April 2004 17:26 (twenty-two years ago)

Atlanta rappers have the hardest job and usually do it the best

― C0L1N B3CK3TT (Colin Beckett), Wednesday, 14 April 2004 17:26 (twenty-two years ago)

I always thought Public Enemy's re-dubbing of Roosevelt, Long Island into "The `Velt, Strong Island" was one of the funniest things ever.

Likewise, Wu-Tang's referring to oh-so-bland Staten Island as "Shaolin". Hilarious, however unintentionally.

― Alex in NYC (vassifer), Wednesday, 14 April 2004 17:27 (twenty-two years ago)

My old room mate called Mattapan in Boston, Murderpan.

He was white, rich and wore corn rows, he ruled.

― ddb, Wednesday, 14 April 2004 18:02 (twenty-two years ago)

Definitely Mix-A-Lot, as noted above. Anyone who's been to Capitol Hill knows how un-street it is to rap about Dick's Hamburgers.

― mike a, Wednesday, 14 April 2004 18:05 (twenty-two years ago)

Ive been waiting for years for Madlib to rap about Oxnard, but sadly, he has not.

― bill stevens (bscrubbins), Wednesday, 14 April 2004 18:06 (twenty-two years ago)

"Shots Paul," MN was getting tossed around for a while

― Keith Harris (kharris1128), Wednesday, 14 April 2004 18:08 (twenty-two years ago)

Littleman's version of Camden Lock is unlike the tie dye and Doc Martens-themed tourist trap that I know.

Although they did fish a body out of the canal a few years ago...

― @d@ml (nordicskilla), Wednesday, 14 April 2004 18:10 (twenty-two years ago)

"Shots Paul," MN was getting tossed around for a while

What about Murderapolis?

― christhamrin (christhamrin), Wednesday, 14 April 2004 18:12 (twenty-two years ago)

What about Murderapolis?

Didn't the NYT or somebody come up with that? Here's 612THUG's take:

http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=Murderapolis

― Keith Harris (kharris1128), Wednesday, 14 April 2004 18:23 (twenty-two years ago)

Or Murderota Heights? Or Eeze Shots Paul? Or Blammington? Or Crooklyn Heights? Or Bloodley? Or Va'dina?

Think I'll skip Coon Rapids this time...

― Pleasant Plains (Pleasant Plains), Wednesday, 14 April 2004 18:25 (twenty-two years ago)

Likewise, Wu-Tang's referring to oh-so-bland Staten Island as "Shaolin". Hilarious, however unintentionally.

I don't follow the "unintentionally hilarious" part.

― djdee2005, Wednesday, 14 April 2004 18:26 (twenty-two years ago)

One of my favorites is The Roots calling Philly "Illadelph", although Philadelphia is actually a pretty fucking interesting city.

― nickalicious (nickalicious), Wednesday, 14 April 2004 18:26 (twenty-two years ago)

You know "ill" is a good thing, right?

― djdee2005, Wednesday, 14 April 2004 18:27 (twenty-two years ago)

Or Murderota Heights? Or Eeze Shots Paul? Or Blammington?

E-Die-Na

― Keith Harris (kharris1128), Wednesday, 14 April 2004 18:29 (twenty-two years ago)

Stank Cloud?

― Pleasant Plains (Pleasant Plains), Wednesday, 14 April 2004 18:31 (twenty-two years ago)

I love how the st louis rappers give shout-outs to I-70 exits like Natural Bridge Road and Kingshighway. Also Chingy talking about seeing a girl at Frontenac (Mall, the posh one with a Neiman-Marcus and Saks) slays me every time.

― teeny (teeny), Wednesday, 14 April 2004 18:35 (twenty-two years ago)

You know "ill" is a good thing, right?

No, I didn't know that.

― nickalicious (nickalicious), Wednesday, 14 April 2004 18:39 (twenty-two years ago)

...and "Catch me in the Galleria, Plaza of Chesterfield" (mmm, Chesterfield)

― gabbneb (gabbneb), Wednesday, 14 April 2004 18:39 (twenty-two years ago)

If someone says "awwww, that's ill" - it means it is "dope," "money," or "supurb."

― djdee2005, Wednesday, 14 April 2004 18:42 (twenty-two years ago)

"Not BAD meaning BAD but BAD meaning GOOD!"

― djdee2005, Wednesday, 14 April 2004 18:43 (twenty-two years ago)

also def!

SO SO DEF!

― Shakey Mo Collier, Wednesday, 14 April 2004 18:44 (twenty-two years ago)

Dude, what the ever-loving fuck, do you really think I don't know what 'ill' means!?! Jesus fucking Christ on a fucking STICK.

― nickalicious (nickalicious), Wednesday, 14 April 2004 18:44 (twenty-two years ago)

Do you see how one could misunderstand you?

― djdee2005, Wednesday, 14 April 2004 18:46 (twenty-two years ago)

I just wanted to say the word "def".

― Shakey Mo Collier, Wednesday, 14 April 2004 18:46 (twenty-two years ago)

Not really. But I am a dumbass.

― nickalicious (nickalicious), Wednesday, 14 April 2004 18:48 (twenty-two years ago)

Oh wait ha ha poor sentence construction, I see.

*shoots self*

― nickalicious (nickalicious), Wednesday, 14 April 2004 18:49 (twenty-two years ago)

Let me try again - I would say The Roots' referring to Philly as "Illadelph" would be a wonderful example of what this thread title is getting at if Philly wasn't actually ill as all fuck.

― nickalicious (nickalicious), Wednesday, 14 April 2004 18:50 (twenty-two years ago)

"Aawwww, that's ill...INOIS!"

c'MON everyone! Lemme hear some illiNOIS!

― Pleasant Plains (Pleasant Plains), Wednesday, 14 April 2004 18:51 (twenty-two years ago)

"Westchester, the best-chester."

― roxymuzak (roxymuzak), Wednesday, 14 April 2004 18:51 (twenty-two years ago)

Its allll good.

― djdee2005, Wednesday, 14 April 2004 18:51 (twenty-two years ago)

DM from Leytonstone refers to his estate as the Bronx on 'Bronx Tale'. And i've heard people call Clapton CLAP TOWN like the noise a gun makes when you shoot it - CLAP CLAP!!!! The ghettos in London are called The Ends which is pretty depressing when u think about it.

― scg, Wednesday, 14 April 2004 19:11 (twenty-two years ago)

"Money earnin' Mt. Vernon" is really way too suburban

― angel duster, Wednesday, 14 April 2004 20:23 (twenty-two years ago)

Likewise, Wu-Tang's referring to oh-so-bland Staten Island as "Shaolin". Hilarious, however unintentionally.

I don't follow the "unintentionally hilarious" part.

I don't think the Clan intend their allusions to Staten Island as "from the slums of Shaolin" to sound funny.

― Alex in NYC (vassifer), Wednesday, 14 April 2004 20:43 (twenty-two years ago)

NORTH CAROLINA COME ON AND RAISE UP

― BLIGGYblaster (astroblaster), Wednesday, 14 April 2004 21:15 (twenty-two years ago)

Kakaty, out of Grand Rapids, Michigan says in "Welcome To Grand Rapids, Part 2":

"Welcome to Grand Rapids/city by the river/welcome to Grand Rapids/make your body shiver."

It's cold AND we have a source of water. Better bring a jacket, punks.

― Colin, Wednesday, 14 April 2004 22:27 (twenty-two years ago)

"Welcome to Atlanta"

― Curt1s St3ph3ns, Wednesday, 14 April 2004 22:38 (twenty-two years ago)

there was a guy from near where i come from who put out tapes trying to make out the locale was some kind of thug heavy gangster ghetto. it is in fact wallsend in the northeast of england where sting comes from. man i wish i still had those tapes like.

― myke boomnoise (myke boomnoise), Wednesday, 14 April 2004 22:45 (twenty-two years ago)

"I don't think the Clan intend their allusions to Staten Island as "from the slums of Shaolin" to sound funny."

That's because you're a dope.

― Alex in SF (Alex in SF), Wednesday, 14 April 2004 22:49 (twenty-two years ago)

oh Curtis how can you diss "welcome to atlanta" like that????

― cinniblount (James Blount), Wednesday, 14 April 2004 22:52 (twenty-two years ago)

not rappers, but the ghosttown dj's story for how they got their name always brought a tear

― cinniblount (James Blount), Wednesday, 14 April 2004 22:53 (twenty-two years ago)

Nick's a hardcore rapper and Del fan, which you should have known.
I just don't get how U find the time to post so damn much.

― Squirrel_Police (Squirrel_Police), Wednesday, 14 April 2004 23:08 (twenty-two years ago)

Canadian rappers to thread

― Sym (shmuel), Wednesday, 14 April 2004 23:18 (twenty-two years ago)

That's because you're a dope.

Why don't you go lick yourself where you shit?

Hell, I like the Wu-Tang Clan. I just don't think they think it's as funny as I do.

Oh, and fuck you, Alex.

― Alex in NYC (vassifer), Wednesday, 14 April 2004 23:53 (twenty-two years ago)

"Why don't you go lick yourself where you shit?"

Cuz you already cleaned it up real nice last night, bitch.

I think this whole thing may come down to how funny you think it is, Alex, cause I think it's pretty obvious that they are playing the Shaw b-movie aesthetic largely for idiosyncratic entertainment value.

Oh by the way Alex, fuck you, too. ;)

― Alex in SF (Alex in SF), Thursday, 15 April 2004 00:02 (twenty-two years ago)

No, I know from whence they take the allusion, I just think it's damn funny. And I'm not suggesting they don't have a sense of humour, I just think they take themselves pretty damn seriously (with the exception of ODB, of course).

Whatever, Alex. Tell your Mom to stop calling me.

― Alex in NYC (vassifer), Thursday, 15 April 2004 00:05 (twenty-two years ago)

I'm baffled that you would think that, since virtually everyone other than GZA has released tracks (or entire ALBUMS in the case of RZA) which are clearly total pisstakes.

Mom, stop calling Alex in NYC a small dicked little pussy, kay. I think it's hurting his feelings.

― Alex in SF (Alex in SF), Thursday, 15 April 2004 00:10 (twenty-two years ago)

Hahahahaha....okay, okay. Truce! ;)

― Alex in NYC (vassifer), Thursday, 15 April 2004 00:16 (twenty-two years ago)

stop it you two, alex must not fight alex

and none of you all have ever seen the projects in staten island, I am guessing. you know how "manhattan" doesn't just mean "tall buildings with wacky love-starved magazine editors"? well, staten island isn't just commuters and my wife's family who all pretend like they have mob ties when they don't, poor people live there too.

actually, my wife's cousin was "mr. staten island" for a while. 5'7" but HUGE muscles.

― Begs2Differ (Begs2Differ), Thursday, 15 April 2004 00:21 (twenty-two years ago)

I've been to Staten Island,.....and drunkenly broke into an abandoned lighthouse light factory with Tod [A] of Cop Shoot Cop/Firewater while I was there (my one and only trip there) shortly after September 11th, 2001.

― Alex in NYC (vassifer), Thursday, 15 April 2004 00:23 (twenty-two years ago)

B2D oh wait I was confused. . . I thought Alex was saying that they didn't realize that "the slums of Shaolin" was sort of amusing/funny/contradictory in an images of Staten Island projects vs Buddhist Monastery sort of way. I don't think either of us would dispute there are really unfun projects in Staten Island. I wouldn't at least.

― Alex in SF (Alex in SF), Thursday, 15 April 2004 00:26 (twenty-two years ago)

I want to be the Dr. Zaius Alex in the movie btw. ;)

― Alex in SF (Alex in SF), Thursday, 15 April 2004 00:28 (twenty-two years ago)

at the request of "Canadian rappers to thread"... though i highly doubt that anyone from Windsor, Ontario is on ILM, there's a band called Numbskullz who do a pretty terrible job trying to make my old hometown look bad ass.

― ken taylrr (ken taylrr), Thursday, 15 April 2004 01:16 (twenty-two years ago)

Wolftown Committee to thread.

― Jacob (Jacob), Thursday, 15 April 2004 03:09 (twenty-two years ago)

WEST STAINES MASSIVE!

― Sasha (sgh), Thursday, 15 April 2004 03:17 (twenty-two years ago)

The first track on Redman's Doc's Da Name album is a pretty dire write-up of Newark, NJ (aka 'brick city'), containing such staggering nuggets as 'muphukkas work here' and the like.

― M Carty (mj_c), Thursday, 15 April 2004 06:46 (twenty-two years ago)

No self respecting Ipswichian would refer to East Anglia as 'The Big Mustard', Colemans is a Norfolk t'ing, ya knaa'. How about "The Beet Fields"?

― Chewshabadoo (Chewshabadoo), Friday, 16 April 2004 07:15 (twenty-two years ago)

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