Who thinks Simon Reynolds is extremely attractive?

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...along with being a splendid writer? (Besides me.) Shame about that "grime" stuff, and of course he's married, but DAMN. (Based on a few photos on the Internet and a bit in that film Modulations.)

Ahem. Talk amongst yourselves.

― snazz, Saturday, 22 May 2004 04:56 (twenty-two years ago)

"shame about that 'grime' stuff"? ugh.

― Matos W.K. (M Matos), Saturday, 22 May 2004 05:51 (twenty-two years ago)

http://www.playinginfog.com/portraits/loubarlow.jpg

Well, are you?

― Ian Christe (Ian Christe), Saturday, 22 May 2004 06:07 (twenty-two years ago)

Nice thread.

― LC, Saturday, 22 May 2004 06:19 (twenty-two years ago)

No disrespect to "grime" or Mr. Reynolds; I take him seriously and will listen to (and sometimes purchase) music he recommends, but I inhabit another sphere of taste. I just think the man is v. nice looking. So sue me.

― snazz, Saturday, 22 May 2004 06:35 (twenty-two years ago)

Simon Reynolds is in the Strokes?

― David Allen (David Allen), Saturday, 22 May 2004 07:35 (twenty-two years ago)

I'd hit it.

― Dom Passantino (Dom Passantino), Saturday, 22 May 2004 07:36 (twenty-two years ago)

pictures of him seem somewhat hard to come by.

― mullygrubber (gaz), Saturday, 22 May 2004 07:47 (twenty-two years ago)

try
www2.abc.net.au/arts/soundsliketechno/html/profile.asp?content=Simon+Reynolds&tablename=Media and http://music.hyperreal.org/library/publicity/simon_reynolds/

― J.D. (Justyn Dillingham), Saturday, 22 May 2004 07:54 (twenty-two years ago)

oops, let's try that first one again: http://www2.abc.net.au/arts/soundsliketechno/html/profile.asp?content=Simon+Reynolds&tablename=Media

― J.D. (Justyn Dillingham), Saturday, 22 May 2004 07:55 (twenty-two years ago)

Yes, I'd have to agree he's very handsome.

― the music mole (colin s barrow), Saturday, 22 May 2004 07:57 (twenty-two years ago)

the reason I moved away from NYC is he kept pulling all the chicks and I was left destitute and lonely

― Matos W.K. (M Matos), Saturday, 22 May 2004 07:58 (twenty-two years ago)

matos as drummer

― mullygrubber (gaz), Saturday, 22 May 2004 08:13 (twenty-two years ago)

reynolds is a bit of a wing nut though...(from the photo.) (sorry simon)

― mullygrubber (gaz), Saturday, 22 May 2004 08:15 (twenty-two years ago)

Is 'wing nut' westie slang for 'thinking woman's beefcake'?

― the music mole (colin s barrow), Saturday, 22 May 2004 08:20 (twenty-two years ago)

the chapter in Chuck Klosterman's second book about the first EMP Pop Conference focuses quite a bit on how jealous Chuck felt about Simon getting attractive women's attention despite the fact that he didn't ROCK, MAN!

― Matos W.K. (M Matos), Saturday, 22 May 2004 08:33 (twenty-two years ago)

no col its a direct visual reference to a wingnut.

― mullygrubber (gaz), Saturday, 22 May 2004 08:39 (twenty-two years ago)

YES! Simon is teh hot.

http://music.hyperreal.org/library/publicity/simon_reynolds/
www.twbookmark.com/ authors/28/1315/

(or WAS -- who knows with th'interweb)

Actually looks rather like Yours Truly, if I were male and cuter.

― etherealcereal, Saturday, 22 May 2004 08:44 (twenty-two years ago)

He looks about 22 in those pictures yet was born in 1963 = sold his soul to the devil.

― Sick Mouthy (Nick Southall), Saturday, 22 May 2004 08:52 (twenty-two years ago)

or try
www.twbookmark.com/authors/28/1315/
seen modulations?
now if he would just revert to a rockist aesthetic.
y'all straight boys?

― gnermy, Saturday, 22 May 2004 08:57 (twenty-two years ago)

He looks like my posh mate Will.

― Sick Mouthy (Nick Southall), Saturday, 22 May 2004 09:03 (twenty-two years ago)

Yeah he's pretty good looking. If he was born in '63 (ie 2yrs before me) then he must have a funny portrait in his attic or something. I'm quite jealous.

― Pashmina (Pashmina), Saturday, 22 May 2004 09:05 (twenty-two years ago)

I don't find him hot :(

― The Lex (The Lex), Saturday, 22 May 2004 09:06 (twenty-two years ago)

He's quite good looking in a 14-stone, full-head-of-hair, fresh-faced posh-boy way.

― Sick Mouthy (Nick Southall), Saturday, 22 May 2004 09:10 (twenty-two years ago)

Who do you find attractive, Alex?

― Sick Mouthy (Nick Southall), Saturday, 22 May 2004 09:10 (twenty-two years ago)

Alastair Campbell
Rufus Wainwright
Justin Timberlake, circa whenever he shaved
Alastair Campbell
Marat Safin
Alastair Campbell
Alastair Campbell
Alastair Campbell

― The Lex (The Lex), Saturday, 22 May 2004 09:14 (twenty-two years ago)

OK that has scared the shit out of me.

― Sick Mouthy (Nick Southall), Saturday, 22 May 2004 09:14 (twenty-two years ago)

I mean two of them I can more than understand, safin I can't remember what he looks like, but the other one is giving me the fear.

― Sick Mouthy (Nick Southall), Saturday, 22 May 2004 09:15 (twenty-two years ago)

I've written entire columns about my love for Cynical Ali in the past, I don't think it'd be appropriate to inflict it on ILX right now. I don't actually do celebrity crushes and never really have done... apart from Alastair. Oh, Alastair.

― The Lex (The Lex), Saturday, 22 May 2004 09:17 (twenty-two years ago)

Y GOD Y?

― Sick Mouthy (Nick Southall), Saturday, 22 May 2004 09:17 (twenty-two years ago)

http://sportsmed.starwave.com/media/ten/2002/0830/photo/a_safin_i.jpg
"Hi! I'm Marat Safin and my willies are this big!"

― Sick Mouthy (Nick Southall), Saturday, 22 May 2004 09:18 (twenty-two years ago)

Ha, vindication to some degree. I don't really do celebrity crushes either, but I know awesome when I see it, and mine is at least half about his writing anyway. And since SR is 40 -- possibly 41 -- I don't feel such an old perv at 40 myself. I shall seek out the Klosterman book. Cheers.

― snazz, Saturday, 22 May 2004 09:20 (twenty-two years ago)

I thought it was because power = aphrodisiac, but I still really fancy him.

I think Alastair just possesses a lot of traits I'm attracted to, and he's got the whole alpha male thing going on. And of course he runs marathons so clearly keeps himself in shape. Allison Pearson wrote a really good column called "Devilishly sexy: why we all wanted Alastair" on this very subject the day he resigned.

― The Lex (The Lex), Saturday, 22 May 2004 09:22 (twenty-two years ago)

I've just realizes that the phrase "at least half about [Simon Reynolds'] writing anyway" sort of negates my thesis, so I take it back -- it's only a third about his writing. And that will be all out of me on the subject. P.S. Alastair = eurgh, in my opinion.

― snazz, Saturday, 22 May 2004 09:33 (twenty-two years ago)

You're making me delirious with weird.

― Sick Mouthy (Nick Southall), Saturday, 22 May 2004 09:34 (twenty-two years ago)

dom otm

― strongo hulkington (dubplatestyle), Saturday, 22 May 2004 09:39 (twenty-two years ago)

i think the fact that i just said that means the world's done for

― strongo hulkington (dubplatestyle), Saturday, 22 May 2004 09:40 (twenty-two years ago)

You're making me delirious with weird.

A good thing!

I've just trawled the internet for sexy Alastair photos, then realised I don't know how to post images :(

― The Lex (The Lex), Saturday, 22 May 2004 09:43 (twenty-two years ago)

I saw Alastair Campbell at Rugby train station once.

― Dom Passantino (Dom Passantino), Saturday, 22 May 2004 09:46 (twenty-two years ago)

Are there enough spunky music critics to make a 2005 calendar?

― the music mole (colin s barrow), Saturday, 22 May 2004 09:51 (twenty-two years ago)

There are enough spunky music critics to make a 2005 calender just at Stylus.

― Sick Mouthy (Nick Southall), Saturday, 22 May 2004 09:52 (twenty-two years ago)

I'm never going to achieve sexual arousal ever again. Thanks a lot Nick.

― Dom Passantino (Dom Passantino), Saturday, 22 May 2004 09:54 (twenty-two years ago)

Wow, Dom, that must have been some orgasm.

― the music mole (colin s barrow), Saturday, 22 May 2004 10:04 (twenty-two years ago)

And which spunky Stylus picture did it?

― edward o (edwardo), Saturday, 22 May 2004 10:05 (twenty-two years ago)

http://www.stylusmagazine.com/staff/todd_burns.jpg
http://www.stylusmagazine.com/staff/nick_southall.jpg
http://www.stylusmagazine.com/staff/ed_howard.jpg
http://www.stylusmagazine.com/staff/clem_bastow.jpg
http://www.stylusmagazine.com/staff/hutlock.jpg

Look at us! We're beautiful!

PS. That last one might be fake.

― Sick Mouthy (Nick Southall), Saturday, 22 May 2004 10:10 (twenty-two years ago)

those are deeply disturbing

― strongo hulkington (dubplatestyle), Saturday, 22 May 2004 10:11 (twenty-two years ago)

tell me the first one is a fake too nick. please.

― mullygrubber (gaz), Saturday, 22 May 2004 10:16 (twenty-two years ago)

whitey be indie

― strongo hulkington (dubplatestyle), Saturday, 22 May 2004 10:19 (twenty-two years ago)

haha, the first one is Todd. Burns be wearing suits.

― Sick Mouthy (Nick Southall), Saturday, 22 May 2004 10:23 (twenty-two years ago)

seriously the pic posting on blogs has got to stop

― strongo hulkington (dubplatestyle), Saturday, 22 May 2004 10:24 (twenty-two years ago)

Skipping 76 messages at this point... Click here if you want to load them all.

LOL, in that first picture way upthread, Simon R. looks like Bad Ronald (those of a certain age will know what I'm talking about)

― timmy tannin (pompous), Tuesday, 16 May 2006 15:17 (twenty years ago)

ah yes, Bad Ronald, hiding under the stairs...I always thought Bad Ronald would make a great band name, and then those one-hit video wonders beat me to the punch!...

I think that's Lou Barlow in that first picture...(he would know who Bad Ronald was)...

― hank (hank s), Tuesday, 16 May 2006 18:26 (twenty years ago)

two months pass...

http://www.frieze.com/column_single.asp?c=332

let's get meta.

― Roughage Crew (Enrique), Thursday, 27 July 2006 09:06 (nineteen years ago)

Hey, that piece is really quite good!

― the pinefox (the pinefox), Thursday, 27 July 2006 14:50 (nineteen years ago)

Oh just fuck off back to 1979 and stay there grandad.

― Marcello Carlin (nostudium), Thursday, 27 July 2006 14:55 (nineteen years ago)

(comment directed at SR, btw, not Pinefox)

― Marcello Carlin (nostudium), Thursday, 27 July 2006 14:55 (nineteen years ago)

i really hate the way he uses rock for all popular music. thats such a dated, hideous, oldschool rock critic thing to do. i think id prefer pop music to be honest. and sorry, mr reynolds but public enemy did not make rock music.

― titchyschneider (titchyschneider), Friday, 28 July 2006 12:24 (nineteen years ago)

B-b-but they headlined the Reading Festival!

― Marcello Carlin (nostudium), Friday, 28 July 2006 12:28 (nineteen years ago)

There is a smallness to music writing today that is appropriate to its subject; the endless proliferation of micro-scenes and sub-genres requires fine distinctions and specialist terminology

Hasn't Simes been peddling this line since about 1987? Hardly a new development.

― Venga (Venga), Friday, 28 July 2006 12:32 (nineteen years ago)

average contents of blissblog:

me on *insert link here*
missus on *insert link here*
my mate on *insert link here*

if we're talking about entropy

― Marcello Carlin (nostudium), Friday, 28 July 2006 12:33 (nineteen years ago)

also he persists like 95% of all music writers with the false proposition that nowness should be about NOW, i.e. feed the PR/keep up/don't fall asleep/don't live NOW as opposed to my now or anyone else's.

― Marcello Carlin (nostudium), Friday, 28 July 2006 12:37 (nineteen years ago)

There is a smallness to music writing today that is appropriate to its subject; the endless proliferation of micro-scenes and sub-genres requires fine distinctions and specialist terminology

Hasn't Simes been peddling this line since about 1987? Hardly a new development.

True now more than ever though I figure.

― Konal Doddz (blueski), Friday, 28 July 2006 12:41 (nineteen years ago)

Apart from mine and the other usual long-term suspects, are there any music blogs out there which try to take in the, er, whole equation, or do they all confine themselves to the corners which they know?

― Marcello Carlin (nostudium), Friday, 28 July 2006 12:43 (nineteen years ago)

grimey simey seems to be hankering for things to return to how they were as far as big (rock) acts everyone knows about that tower over the popular music world with everything else tiny fledglings in comparison. understandable - who doesnt like music that resonates widely (i cant talk about a lot of music i like with ppl outside the net cos its all niche stuff), but doesnt all that contradict his PHUTURRRRRRRE/forward obsession?

is it such a bad thing that theres more specialist coverage of music more than ever - makes a change from the old way of doing things which was basically rock critics writing about everything even if they didnt really know all that much about it?

― Im a Schneider, yo Im a Stryder (titchyschneider), Friday, 28 July 2006 12:45 (nineteen years ago)

doesnt all that contradict his PHUTURRRRRRRE/forward obsession?

not at all.

― Roughage Crew (Enrique), Friday, 28 July 2006 12:46 (nineteen years ago)

Basically he wants it to be 1971 again when you only had four bands to keep up with.

― Marcello Carlin (nostudium), Friday, 28 July 2006 12:47 (nineteen years ago)

i don't think so; he's actually talked about how *many* acts there were (on major labels) in the early '70s compared with now.

when the hypest album of the year is dubstep, a genre that's been going on basically unnoticed by anyone outside the scene for a good half-decade, something is wrong, and i thing reynolds is good on why and how.

― Roughage Crew (Enrique), Friday, 28 July 2006 12:50 (nineteen years ago)

xpost - roughage, i agree with him totally that it would be nice if there were more things in the charts pushing things forward (and if there were, music crit might be in a better place). i think thats what hes saying first and foremost, i dont think thats a bad sentiment at all

― titchyschneider (titchyschneider), Friday, 28 July 2006 12:51 (nineteen years ago)

Ten or fifteen years ago, Simon used to celebrate the fragmentation of pop culture, now he bemoans it.

Besides, Public Enemy hardly bestrode Planet Pop like a colossus in 1988 in quite the same way as a Pistols or Stones did they? You could probably make a better case for NWA occupying that position. And from a British perspective, I'd say the last bands to dominate the cultural landscape in that way were the Spice Girls or Oasis (no matter what you may think of either's merits), but they are not bands who fit into Simon's particular cultural niche so he conveniently ignores them.

― Venga (Venga), Friday, 28 July 2006 12:52 (nineteen years ago)

Simon fifteen years ago > Simon ten years ago > Simon now

― Marcello Carlin (nostudium), Friday, 28 July 2006 13:01 (nineteen years ago)

Some of us would argue that current chart music is pushing things forward, just not in the way Reynolds likes or wants.

― Marcello Carlin (nostudium), Friday, 28 July 2006 13:02 (nineteen years ago)

Neither PE nor NWA ever really sold that many records in Britain, either (as opposed to what Dre and Cube did after NWA).

― Marcello Carlin (nostudium), Friday, 28 July 2006 13:03 (nineteen years ago)

Simon fifteen years ago > Simon ten years ago > Simon now

how do you rate yourself on this same basis, out of curiosity?

― Konal Doddz (blueski), Friday, 28 July 2006 13:14 (nineteen years ago)

agree with Roughage Crew - think people are wilfully misunderstanding Reynolds point (however tired it may be). and dubstep is only pushing things sideways (and not very far along), but i've not read any 'big' piece on it myself.

― Konal Doddz (blueski), Friday, 28 July 2006 13:16 (nineteen years ago)

obv. dubstep and 'chart music' are two v different beasts.

― Konal Doddz (blueski), Friday, 28 July 2006 13:17 (nineteen years ago)

Early CoM stands up the best, but it would exhaust me to keep that level of productivity going now.

― Marcello Carlin (nostudium), Friday, 28 July 2006 13:24 (nineteen years ago)

ive no idea what new chart music is pushing things forward.

― titchyschneider (titchyschneider), Friday, 28 July 2006 13:31 (nineteen years ago)

the most innovative/up-to-date/fwd-thinking songs in the top 40 this week:

Busta Rhymes - I Love My Bitch
Pussycat Dolls ft. Snoop Dogg - Buttons
Automatic - Monster
Wolfmother - Woman
Gnarls Barkley - Smiley Faces (altho it sounds totally retro at same time hmm)

Justice vs Simian not eligible cos it's 3 years old

― Konal Doddz (blueski), Friday, 28 July 2006 14:24 (nineteen years ago)

god i hate PCD (and that busta track).

― Enrique (Enrique), Friday, 28 July 2006 14:25 (nineteen years ago)

LUDDITE

― Konal Doddz (blueski), Friday, 28 July 2006 14:29 (nineteen years ago)

Justice vs Simian not eligible cos it's 3 years old

Is Chris Lowe responsible for bringing this to the public gaze?

― Venga (Venga), Friday, 28 July 2006 14:31 (nineteen years ago)

He makes a few great and salient points at the end after front-loading with a whole lot of bullshit that seems designed to put off anyone who might be effected by the good points at the end. "Everything sucks now! Nothing is worth writing about! Why isn't there more good writing?" Geez louise...

― Eppy (Eppy), Friday, 28 July 2006 14:32 (nineteen years ago)

Is Chris Lowe responsible for bringing this to the public gaze?

I don't think so, I think it's just the track having gotten used on TV programmes a lot more.

― Konal Doddz (blueski), Friday, 28 July 2006 14:34 (nineteen years ago)

My verdict on Simon: Too posh, rubber face. Bad black media whore glasses. Prefer Gordon Brown to Alastair Campbell. Bookish Scotsman.

― FACEBRACE (FACEBRACE), Friday, 28 July 2006 14:35 (nineteen years ago)

wolfmother? ROFFLE
i love PCD

― titchyschneider (titchyschneider), Friday, 28 July 2006 14:52 (nineteen years ago)

"There’s a sense, too, in which almost all of the stark, grand statements were used up some time ago, and what’s left, for musicians and critics alike, is complexifying and filling in gaps"

I don't see whats inaccurate about this... although it could be seen as much as a good thing as a bad thing perhaps, an indicator of the aesthetic maturity of post 20th Century pop music?

---EXPOST to Konal: yeah WTF is up with that list?

― gekoppel (Gekoppel), Friday, 28 July 2006 15:00 (nineteen years ago)

Konal, I'm interested in why you thing 'Monster' is innovative/up-to-date/ fwd thinking?
I ask because I really can't stand that song. It's seems staggeringly dire, and cynical with it (Possibly that is the answer to the question?)

― Bidfurd (Bidfurd), Friday, 28 July 2006 17:44 (nineteen years ago)

is that a cold sore on his lip?

― shookout (shookout), Friday, 28 July 2006 18:04 (nineteen years ago)

Justice vs Simian not eligible cos it's 3 years old

The Wolfmother's more than two years old too! (and also: roffle)

― kit brash (kit brash), Saturday, 29 July 2006 02:38 (nineteen years ago)

my list just shows how uninspiring the top 40 currently is - none of the 5 track i listed are particularly innovative. but they 'stick out' just a little bit more than anything else in there regardless of whether they're any good.

― Konal Doddz (blueski), Saturday, 29 July 2006 10:28 (nineteen years ago)

"Too posh"

Yeah, only poor tossers can understand music. Next you'll be saying you also need a seven inch dick.

― Nathalie (stevie nixed), Saturday, 29 July 2006 11:13 (nineteen years ago)

"god i hate PCD (and that busta track)."

But "Buttons" is their best track yet!

Simon's piece makes sense. Invariably I agree more with his published pieces where he moderates his polemics with a bit of fact and accuracy, than with the nose-tweaking blog posts where all I can sense is that my nose has been tweaked.

― Tim Finney (Tim Finney), Sunday, 30 July 2006 23:05 (nineteen years ago)

"god i hate PCD (and that busta track)."
But "Buttons" is their best track yet!

these statements are perfectly compatible.

― Enrique (Enrique), Monday, 31 July 2006 07:24 (nineteen years ago)

I know! I'm saying don't dismiss "Buttons" until you've heard it!

― Tim Finney (Tim Finney), Monday, 31 July 2006 07:49 (nineteen years ago)

i have!

― Enrique (Enrique), Monday, 31 July 2006 07:53 (nineteen years ago)

this thread = another marcello carlin bitchfest where he attacks another writer not necessarily for the writers skill but because said writer is simply more respected and famous than he is. wahey!

― tigertiger (tigertiger), Monday, 31 July 2006 11:23 (nineteen years ago)

You say it like that's a bad thing?

― alext (alext), Monday, 31 July 2006 11:25 (nineteen years ago)

I like "Buttons" a lot but I'm not sure how innovative forward thinking it is when its just a rewrite of Beyonce's "Naughty Girl (Remix)." I guess you might say that kind of Truth Hurts' "Addictive" type of thing "up-to-date," though.

― Zwan (miccio), Monday, 31 July 2006 12:35 (nineteen years ago)

oof. that grammar.

― Zwan (miccio), Monday, 31 July 2006 12:39 (nineteen years ago)

"There’s a sense, too, in which almost all of the stark, grand statements were used up some time ago, and what’s left, for musicians and critics alike, is complexifying and filling in gaps"

to return to this, it reminds me of something P Sherburne said a while back about the future of electronic music lying in it using its now fully developed language of production tricks to create emotionally moving music, rather than pushing the envelope (as it was now fully pushed, so to speak...)

― gekoppel (Gekoppel), Monday, 31 July 2006 21:50 (nineteen years ago)

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