Coming In A Girl's Mouth by Momus: classic or dud?

Although he could have been sparing the Spaceland staff member's blushes?

:)

Buckminster Fuller, inventor of the geodesic dome
Once gave a lecture he entitled 'Everything I know'
Taking the title literally, he spoke four years or so
And I intend to do the same, so make yourself at home
(Pull up a chair, smoke a cigar or something)
Cynthia Plaster Caster once took my cast and showed me
In a penis exhibition in a gallery on Broadway
So many people saw my penis in its glass case
They recognise my penis now before my face

Subject for today: does knowledge elevate or demean us?
Everything you didn't want to know about my penis

A baker has a penis thing for flattening the dough
But stick it in the oven and it rises up, like so
The man who chops the melons up with a long and pointed knife
Has a penis with a mottled skin, I know, I asked his wife
(Very curious)
A priest beneath his cassock has a penis just the same
Some call the hypothalamus the penis of the brain
One man's sport is fly fishing, the other's pocket billiards
Congratulations, Watson, on your almost-Freudian brilliance

The comedian from hell always thinks he can entertain us
With everything we didn't want to know about his penis

Like the heather of the Highlands, mine is tipped with flecks of purple
With a head as wise as Solomon, although shaped like a turtle
It wears a flesh-tone roll-neck and the neck goes up and down
It comes out in the evenings and on Friday paints the town
Obsessively, compulsively, it only wants one thing
To fill your chosen orifice with ropes of pearly string
Delivering its message to your womb or to your tongue
And then going slack and flaccid when its pressing work is done

In witty conversation, by drip or intravenus
I drop everything you didn't want to know about my penis
(Some sort of Tourette Syndrome)

It's a very fine philosopher, debating right and wrong
Shows promise as a songwriter (it writes most of my songs)
Don't bury it in boxer shorts but wear it like a tie
Or avant garde jewellery hanging from your fly
(Very chic!)
Jean Luc Godard once declared, to gales of mystified laughter
That some men wash their hands before they touch it, others after
And if you slot it carefully where the sun will never shine
You'll feel what's mine becoming yours, what's yours becoming mine

Ladies and hermaphrodites, my tender-hearted readers
Everything you didn't want to know about my penis

There was a bohemian monk
Who went to bed in a bunk
He dreamt that Venus
Was stroking his penis
And woke up all covered in .....

Thought for the day: does abstinence dirty us or clean us?
Everything you didn't want to know about my penis

It's a tribute to the power of something otherwise mundane
That waving it under a stranger's nose is said to scar his brain
I'm doing my bit to see the power of taboo remains intact:
I keep a penis on my head but never lift my hat
(I keep a penis on my head but never lift my hat)

And if I've bored you stiff with this riff about my penis
I wouldn't let a little thing like that come between us

And if you can think of another song even more atrocious
Well supercalifragilisiticexpifuckingdocious

-- Alba (albab...), May 9th, 2005 11:49 AM. (Alba) (later) (link)

No, I think that was "I Ate a Girl Right Up." Yummy.

http://jdeanicite.typepad.com/i_cite/images/zizek_wedding_2.jpg

That piece of writing right there however, is everything I look for in literature. I honestly very truely love it, and respect him for wallowing in a place nobody else goes with such honesty and courage and humor.

Yeah, terrible lyrics. Same reason I don't like Zappa.

Coming in a Girl's Mouth is part of a batch of songs I wrote in 1998 which were influenced by writing e mail. The idea was to make songs which had the directness and informality of e mails, but also had something 18th century about them (powdered wigs, Alexander Pope, satire and parody, salon poison, snuff, an arch manner). Computers had ushered in a new Enlightenment, something like that. There was a lot of porn and a lot of commentary too. There was Reason and its opposite. So put them together.

The idea was also to incarnate a certain idea of "the European libertine" and heighten it for Americans, and particularly gay Americans (at the time I was angling for the Kiki and Herb audience at Fez, NYC, I think). So I think of this as a rather gay song, despite the hetero context. You know, a song John Waters would have a character sing.

And 1998 was also the Golden Age of bukkake, so that was a natural subject. I remember walking around Chalk Farm with Anthony from Jack, telling him that I'd decided to write a song with that title. It just had to be done. Not only for the sheer outrageousness of it, not only because Primal Scream would never dare write it, but because I really wanted an answer to the question in the first line. What does it mean? How do we feel about it? Why do I like to do it? How do we disentangle love from power, clean from dirty, S from M? It's comedy, but like a lot of comedy it thrives on crisis and isn't too far from the biggest philosophical and psychological questions.

And although the first line is clunky, and the diversion into the John the Baptist stuff loopy, the last line is good poetry, I think: "honey, tapioca and motor oil". (Especially with the gestures when I do the song live: ticky tacky finger gestures, oil-pouring gestures, feigned revulsion.)

One more thing to add: my songs are usually very topical, and this was also the time of the Clinton fellatio scandal. This stuff was in the air during a presidency in which an intern might be given gifts of Nicholson Baker novels and Walt Whitman poems. God, I miss those days!

Can't you simplify ALL art this way?

Oh, wait, you're all talking about the song...nevermind. The song is pretty good.

Oh, the sweet stardust memories.

Would this fall under "Conformity Assessment"?

"Golden Age. The ancients divided the life cycle into the Golden, Silver, Bronze and Iron Ages. The Golden was an age of primeval purity, simplicity and general happiness."

Therefore, bukkake has fallen from it's former glory into being impure, unhappy, and far too complicated.

Hard to argue, I suppose.

http://www.phat5.com/features.asp?StoryID=534&SectionID=11&LayoutType=1&StoryMonth=4&StoryYear=2005

"the quantity of the semen is many, is. Locking the head of the meeting
? which the face the ? is directed firmly, the ? ? the actor
large number which is applied. The ogre domesticated fowl and animals
(^ ^ it draws ??? being to be good,, but we wanted with the
discharge scene stopping waist errand at least, don't you think? is.

"At large milk of E cup of ???? meeting ? ????. For
the first time, the squid it was possible with ???? to do, so
is. Don't you think? the horseman power it is the rank ? ? applying
last scene. As for the partner the flower Oka ? ? it is. The
flower Oka ? ? it is as for ??? of the person being
???, to see, you answer. The ? ? applying as the normal rank
? ? applying using the same actor, the coming out of the semen is
a little bad, is. But, conversely that at a stroke preventing the fact
that it becomes ???? state, it increases. Disaster changing,
the feeling which you say. The SI grass which the middle, paints the
semen in the self large milk and extends is and is ??. You finish
to per ?? in ????. (The flower Oka semen oven it is it is
dense, is)"

*rim shot*

Wrong part of the body entirely.