Worst rhyme in a song ?

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I'd vote for Europe, the Final Countdown :

"We're heading for venus . . . cause maybe they've seen us"

Up there with MacGonagall . . .

― Dave H, Thursday, 12 May 2005 13:55 (twenty-one years ago)

When I was a kid I heard some rap song that went like, "I'm not Jewish or Jamaican, but I keep making fresh new ryhmes that keep Menachem Begin breakin." I have no idea who it was.

― svend (svend), Thursday, 12 May 2005 14:05 (twenty-one years ago)

"Generals gathered in the masses
...just like witches at black......masses!"

― Alex in NYC (vassifer), Thursday, 12 May 2005 14:18 (twenty-one years ago)

their masses, I should say.

― Alex in NYC (vassifer), Thursday, 12 May 2005 14:18 (twenty-one years ago)

Spandau Ballet, "Highly Strung": "She used to be a diplomat / But now she's down the laundromat." Well, yes, quite.

― brittle-lemon, Thursday, 12 May 2005 15:06 (twenty-one years ago)

I refuse to believe that the Kemp could write a bad rhyme

― Morley Timmons (Donna Brown), Thursday, 12 May 2005 15:08 (twenty-one years ago)

on his 1st solo record graham coxon rhymes cinderella with salmonella.

but that might be brilliant.

― b b, Thursday, 12 May 2005 16:30 (twenty-one years ago)

worst/best from ODB/GZA:
"He said he wasn't from Panama
I asked him how he got so dark and the nigga said, Sun Tanama!"

― Space Is the Place (Space Is the Place), Thursday, 12 May 2005 16:39 (twenty-one years ago)

"It's no use, he sees her/he starts to shake and cough
...just like the old man in that famous book by Nabokov".

Literary pedants and genuinely irritating intellectuals often take this a step further and cite that the correct pronunciation of the author in question is actually "naBOKov," and not "NAbokoff." Fuckin' Sting.

― Alex in NYC (vassifer), Thursday, 12 May 2005 17:03 (twenty-one years ago)

"he was coming home from the studio late" - oh forget it!

― weasel diesel (K1l14n), Thursday, 12 May 2005 17:49 (twenty-one years ago)

all these are generally pretty good. the ones that suck are the nabakov one, and the Sabbath.

rhyming Homer with Homer...marvelous.

― AaronK (AaronK), Thursday, 12 May 2005 17:52 (twenty-one years ago)

she's living la Vida loca
her lips are devil red
her skin is the color MOCHA

― david day (winslow), Thursday, 12 May 2005 17:58 (twenty-one years ago)

Your the best girl that I ever did see,
The great Larry Bird Jersey 33
When you take a sip you buzz like a hornet
Billy Shakespere wrote a whole bunch of sonnets

....but we are talking bad bad forgotten boy bands here.

― corinne, Thursday, 12 May 2005 18:02 (twenty-one years ago)

we're out all night, chasing girlies
we're late for work and we go home earlies
- Luna, "Chinatown"

― dewey, Thursday, 12 May 2005 18:25 (twenty-one years ago)

I'm just from Encino, why are you so mean-o?

― a banana (alanbanana), Thursday, 12 May 2005 18:27 (twenty-one years ago)

Des'ree's "Life" completely rules this thread.

Ooh, Yeah
Oh yeah
Oh Life
Oh Life

I'm afraid of the dark
Especially when I'm in a park
When there's no one else around
Oh I get the shivers
I don't wanna see a ghost
It's the sight that I fear most
I'd rather have a piece of toast
Watch the evening news

Life, oh life
Oh life, oh life
Life, oh life
Oh life, oh life

I'm a superstitious girl
I'm the worst in the world
Never walk under ladders
I keep a rabbits' tail
I'll take you up on a dare
Anytime, anywhere
Name the place, I'll be there
Bungee jumping, I don't care

Life, oh life
Oh life, oh life
Life, oh life
Oh life, oh life

Life So after all's said and done
I know I'm not the only one
Life indeed can be fun If you really want to
Sometimes living out your dreams
Ain't as easy as it seems
You wanna fly around the world In a beautiful balloon

Life, oh life
Oh life, oh life
Life, oh life
Oh life, oh life

Life, oh life
Oh life, oh life
Life, oh life
Oh life, oh life
Oh life, oh life..

― The Ghost of Dan Perry (Dan Perry), Thursday, 12 May 2005 18:28 (twenty-one years ago)

So THAT's why she was a one-hit wonder!

― Joseph McCombs (Joseph McCombs), Thursday, 12 May 2005 18:31 (twenty-one years ago)

"My favourite buildings have been all laid to waste,
One might as well make a statue from toothpaste..."

― That's not cocaine! It's Ian Riese-Moraine! (Eastern Mantra), Thursday, 12 May 2005 19:06 (twenty-one years ago)

Des'ree's "Life" completely rules this thread.

Easily the worst lyrics of seen since Live's "Rattlesnake"

― The Good Dr. Bill (The Good Dr. Bill), Thursday, 12 May 2005 19:29 (twenty-one years ago)

New Order:

Love, it can't be bought, can't be sold
It is a color other than gold

― mrjosh (mrjosh), Thursday, 12 May 2005 19:46 (twenty-one years ago)

weezer - we're all on drugs

every single rhyme in there.

― jonathan - stl (jonathan - stl), Thursday, 12 May 2005 20:21 (twenty-one years ago)

when the beasties rhymed commerical..with commercial on check your head

still cringe when i hear it

― phunktion, Thursday, 12 May 2005 22:14 (twenty-one years ago)

Ha ha - I was just about to post it!

― Thermo Thinwall (Thermo Thinwall), Thursday, 12 May 2005 22:27 (twenty-one years ago)

Eh.. what the hell:

Everybody's Rapping Like It's A Commercial
Actin' Like Life Is A Big Commercial

― Thermo Thinwall (Thermo Thinwall), Thursday, 12 May 2005 22:28 (twenty-one years ago)

Didn't the Beastie Boys also have some politically charged song where they briefly rapped about waffles?

― Alan Conceicao (Alan Conceicao), Thursday, 12 May 2005 22:33 (twenty-one years ago)

ha, i think that beastie boys one is awesome and funny. i suppose he could have tried to fit 'herschel' or something like that in there, but then that line wouldn't be nearly as memorable

― 6335, Thursday, 12 May 2005 22:38 (twenty-one years ago)

I've had enough of the falseness
Of a worn-out relation
Enough of the jealousy
[Oboyoboy, here it comes...]
And the intoleration...

― rogermexico (rogermexico), Friday, 13 May 2005 05:35 (twenty-one years ago)

The Beastie Boys one was supposed to be ..."life is a big rehearsal", but it came out wrong & they couldn't be bothered to do another take, apparantly

― bham, Friday, 13 May 2005 07:12 (twenty-one years ago)

three years pass...

There's no rhyme I hate more than "by myself/on the shelf" (awkward sound, awkward metaphor) and now I have to hear it all the time in zooey deschanel's irritating self-pleased croon. Not to mention "I've gotta get your presence (presents?)/I think you're just so pleasant"

― Hurting 2, Saturday, 2 August 2008 03:48 (seventeen years ago)

"My love don't give me presents
I know that she's no peasant"

― Mr. Snrub, Saturday, 2 August 2008 05:45 (seventeen years ago)

"The Ford explorer boomin' with that trunk of funk
All you jealous punks can't stop my dunks"

Shaquille O'Neal

― Bo Jackson Overdrive, Saturday, 2 August 2008 06:43 (seventeen years ago)

That's a swagger-jacked Chuck D line where he updated "98" to "Ford Explorer.

― Whiney G. Weingarten, Saturday, 2 August 2008 08:44 (seventeen years ago)

man, someone already posted LFO, but those two songs are like the fucking winners of all time. Like Sandler's turkey song if it were tragedy instead of comedy

― Whiney G. Weingarten, Saturday, 2 August 2008 08:46 (seventeen years ago)

yea, I've heard the PE song...actually like the Chuck D version.

Shaq's is lame due to making it his gazillionth basketball zinger when he changed it from "stop thedunks" to "stop my dunks".

― Bo Jackson Overdrive, Saturday, 2 August 2008 15:20 (seventeen years ago)

the entire Ghosts album by German metal band Rage has a lot of weird rhymes, but I suppose that's cuz english wasn't their first language.

"If it's the last thing I would do
I will apologize to you
The only thing I ever wanted was you
I know this is the only bigger truth"

"I never meant this thing to you
If you could only see what's true
It's like a pattern in my mind
It makes me rageous, makes me blind"

― Bo Jackson Overdrive, Saturday, 2 August 2008 15:23 (seventeen years ago)

LFO was brilliant.

― waffy12345, Saturday, 2 August 2008 15:58 (seventeen years ago)

Big Black Nemesis, parthenogenesis
No one move a muscle as the dead come home

Best or worst, can't say.

― derelict, Saturday, 2 August 2008 16:20 (seventeen years ago)

David Sneddon's "Stop Living The Lie"

He sits alone at a table in a small cafe
Drowning his tears in a bottomless cup of coffee
And hes tumbling into his thoughts
His memories are all tied in knots

Later in the same song he rhymes "saviour" with "favour", and "angel" with... "angel"...

― snoball, Saturday, 2 August 2008 17:24 (seventeen years ago)

We're the horniest boys/With the corniest ploys
Who take the easiest girls/To our sleaziest worlds

Depeche Mode .: "The Dead of Night"
i like DM but yuck.

― myndbloom, Saturday, 2 August 2008 22:42 (seventeen years ago)

Oh man, I NEVER get tired of ranting about this awesomely awful rhyme, from Joe Jones's "You Talk Too Much" (1960):

You talk too much, you worry me to death,
You talk too much, you even worry my pet

Amazing! A total non-sequitur that doesn't even rhyme properly. I can think of only 4 English-language words that rhyme with "death", two of which are proper names (Beth, Seth), and one which maybe didn't even exist in 1960 (meth), leaving "breath" as the only viable rhyme. How hard is it to think of a logical connection between breath and excessive verbosity? "Save your breath!" "You never take a breath!" Etc.

― Myonga Vön Bontee, Sunday, 3 August 2008 01:57 (seventeen years ago)

LL Cool J:

You lied about the things that you lied about
You even lied to your aunt, when you went down south

― Pillbox, Sunday, 3 August 2008 06:23 (seventeen years ago)

hahaha, that line has always been so O_o to me

― Whiney G. Weingarten, Sunday, 3 August 2008 07:11 (seventeen years ago)

two months pass...

To be fair to LL, the first line is "You lied about the lies that you lied about," which may not be all that clever but it's at least not a circular statement of fact....

― Doctor Casino, Sunday, 5 October 2008 18:22 (seventeen years ago)

ten months pass...

I love New Order but they have made some dodgy rhymes in their time, none more so than:

Your country is a wonderful place
It pales my England into disgrace
To buy a drink that is so much more reasonable
I think I'll go there when it gets seasonable

...from Sooner Than You Think.

― Daniel Giraffe, Friday, 21 August 2009 07:39 (sixteen years ago)

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