Jail House Rock, Cummins Unit Style

here at the paper we receive several letters a day from prisoners around the state, usually requesting an investigation into their cases and/or proclaiming innocence and all that. sometimes they have legit complaints. usually not. but they're almost always fairly bizarre.

today's letter is fairly short and to the point:
"Dear editor, I need support on getting paroled for mistake ... they rule loss of property when it should have been injury ... case number xxxxxxxx ... mistake on caller, they're not to be believed, don't let them see."

and that's the end of it. at the bottom of the page is written "see other side." which is where the fun begins! here's what's there (sic all):

"These Songs I sing: Have second Grade Music Teacher Verify Claim.

(These) are (Them):

Purple Rain (All) (contest entry)
Pimp Juice (that contest entry)
Pimp Stuff (contest entry)
Punk Stuff (contest entry)
Pink Stuff (contest entry)
Shirley Ceauser [???]
Wide Receiver (contest entry)
L.T.D. (contest entry)
Holding On
Too Short Wrapp (Rap) (contest entry)
Missing You
The Breaks (contest entry)
The Message (contest entry)
Message to the Blackman (novel and song)
Girl Talk (contest entry)
Peanut Butter (contest entry)
Superfly (contest entry)
Return of the Mack (contest entry)
New Birth (contest entry)
Too many ladys
Rocked in the tree top
Bonanza (song and movie)
Big Valley (song and movie)
Musicology
Dove Cry (contest entry)
Stone to the Bone (contest entry)
Mr. Union Man (contest entry)
Mr. Muscle (contest entry)
Mack 10
Return of the Man
Bad to the Bone
Slave
The Mack
Harvest for the world
Return to Superfly
Ice Cream Man
Funkadelic (All)
Cosmo D (contest entry)
Drench
Chips Ahoy (contest entry)
Ship Ahoy (contest entry)
Pocket full of Dud
Easy (contest entry)
Return to Easy (contest entry)
Burger King (contest entry)
Soulful (contest entry)
I stand accused
Estacy (contest entry)
Louisiana (contest entry)
Uptown side of Jive
Stretchingg out in the Bootsy
Rubber Band (contest entry)
What I like to do
Born on the Buyou (contest entry)
Chicken-N-Beer (contest entry)
Lonnie Lyston Smith and Stanley Clark (All)
Bad Boys (contest entry)
Up Town (contest entry)
Mid-night train to Georgia
Beg for Mercy
Let's talk About it
Good Side Bad Side
If you don't know the things you dealing (all)
Criss Cross sa make you jump jump
Little Red Riding Hood (contest entry)
Me and Baby Brother (All)
Thanks for my child
Speaker Boxx
Princess
Dangerously in Love
Big John
Newbean Princess
Up Beat
Lennie Lenne
Keep your head to the sky
Puff the Magic Dragon
Turn out the light
theme from James Bond
Thriller
Ben
To Grant
To learn
To Be
To Believe
To wish
To care
To Love
To Hate
Percy Sledge (all)
Tu Tu (all)
member me (all)
Songs to the key of life (all)
very superstiious
and the beat goes on"

the end. wtf?