Football Records: S&D

"the superbowl shuffle" by the chicago bears

no. the england new order 'world in motion' single, usually paraded as 'an honourable exception' is poor.

"The Football Albums" by DiskothiQ (it's indie rock so those of you that don't like indie rock wouldn't care for 'em). Two CDs, one NFC and one AFC. Every team gets a song plus there's a song for teamless Los Angeles. Disclaimer: I wrote lyrics for one of the songs. It's the weakest song on the two, though. Otherwise, taken together, they're a pretty brilliant case study in all the different ways one can go working from a fairly narrow theme.

Most Goals Scored for Newcastle United
Jackie Milburn, Striker. Seasons 1946-57, who scored 200 goals in league and cup fixtures.

Now thats what I call a decent football record.

"World In Motion" is great!

I have this 97 Rock Buffalo Bills compilation CD that's really nothing more than extended Karaoke, but is very funny if you're from Buffalo...

Air Miami's "World Cup Fever" is brilliant.

There's also an entertaining 1994 compilation of mostly '60s soccer records called _Bend It!_

Liverpool F.C. is hard as hell
United, Tottenham, Arsenal
Watch my lips, and I will spell
'cause they don't just play, but they can rap aswell

Liverpool F.C.
Liverpool F.C.

My idea was to build Liverpool into a bastion of invincibility...
Napoleon had that idea he'd have conquered the bloody world
Walk on... walk on... with hope... in your heart... and you'll never walk... alone

Alright Aldo
Sound as a pound
I'm cushty la but there's nothing down
The rest of the lads ain't got it sussed
We'll have to learn 'em to talk like us

Well I'm rapping now, I'm rapping for fun
I'm your goalie, the number one
You can take the mick, don't call me a clown
Any more lip and you're going down

Alright Ace, we're great me and you
But the other lads don't talk like we do
No they don't talk like we do, do they do la
We'll have to learn 'em to talk propah

Walk on... walk on... with hope... in your heart... and you'll ne... ver walk... alone

You two scousers are always yapping
I'm gonna show you some serious rapping
I come from Jamaica, my name is John Barn-es
When I do my thing the crowd go bananas

How's he doing the Jamaica rap?
He's from just south of the Watford Gap
He gives us stick about the north/south divide
'cause they got the jobs
Yeah, but we got the side

Well I came to England looking for fame
So come on Kenny man, give us a game
'cause I'm sat on the bench paying my dues with th e blues
I'm very big down under, but my wife disagrees

They've won the league, bigger stars than Dallas
They got more silver than Buckingham Palace
No-one knows quite what to expect
When the red machine's in full effect

Well Steve McMahon sure can rap
It's about time he had an England cap
So come on Bobby Robson, he's the man
'cause if anyone can, Macca can
Macca-can... Macca-can... Macca-can... Macca-can...

Liverpool F.C. is hard as hell
My idea was to build Liverpool up and up and up until eventually they would be untouchable. Everybody would have to submit. Give in, give in, give in

We're Highland lads
Och-ai the noo
And there's four of us
And only two of you
So if you want nai trouble
And you don't want a slap
You'd better teach us the Anfield rap

Don't forget us paddies
And me the Great Dane
And I'm from London mate so watch your game
Well you two scousers, you're always talking
But we'll just let our feet do the talking

Our lads have come from all over the place
They talk dead funny, but they play dead great
Well now we've gotta learn 'em to talk real cool
The song you've gotta learn if you're Liverpool

Walk on... walk on... with hope... in your heart... and you'll ne... ver walk... alone
You'll never walk alone

Ho-ho my word
That's unbelievable, it really is
I think they should stick to playing football. Terrible
What do you think Kenny?

Oh yeah!

A nod of agreement for "World Cup Fever" by Air Miami. That song cracks me up. Now I gotta put it on.

Buy this. Sign here. Sign there. Sell that. Who's talking? Snack bar, let's go!
Sie gehen zu mehr(?). Ich bin hier. Kaufen Sie diese. (???) Who's talking? Golf cart, let's go!

What a nut. There's even a remix CD for that track, released in '98 to coincide with the last World Cup, perhaps with a small amount of hope that it might become a surprise hit.

Oops lemme close those italics.

Oh when St.Georges lads go a-playing

And the winter nights are cold

When the stable rocks with an Englsih horse

And the tavern keeps out the cold

We'll smash your Scottish heads off

With our righetous sticks and stones

When our homo-erotic thoughts laiden-be bare

We'll all have fuckin' bones

We are red, we are white

I've been out in the sun for ages

Fuck off you English c**t!

When the Big White Man goes jumping

On the bones of the Scottish deer

And we chow down on your piss-weak ale

God's will will ever be clear

That the Scottish wank off toddlers

And the English stop this from being be

Your fat hands are around a newborn's knob

While we sing "Victory"

Only joking there kids, but jesus what was that guy thinking of? I think blind nationalism has no place on ILE!

Well I like "Ipswich Ipswich (Get That Goal)' but I suspect that if you're not a fan of the super blues, it may not sound quite so good. Oh and I get goose-bumps when I hear World-In-Motion especially around world cup time.

Ipswich Ipswich (Get That Goal) as performed by the 1978 FA Cup Final Squad

Der duh duh, Der duh duh, Der duh duh, Der duh duh duh, Der duh duh, Der duh duh, Der duh duh, Der duh duh duh

Were all going to Wembley, Thats were we belong, So get on board were going up, Were going to win the cup Ipswich fans are cheering, To help us on our way, We'll play the ball and win the game, It's going to be our day

Ipswich, Ipswich kick that ball, Won't you get that goal for me, Gimme, Gimme Ipswich Town, Going to make some history, Ipswich Ipswich, Ipswich get that goal, Won't you win that cup for me, Ipswich, Gimme, Gimme Ipswich Town, The best at Wember-ley, Ipswich Der duh duh, Der duh duh,

Der duh duh, Der duh duh duh, Der duh duh, Der duh duh, Der duh duh, Der duh duh duh

Were going to be the Champions, We'll gun those Gunners down, And carry off the FA Cup, Back to Ipswich Town So come on everybody, And give your everything, Clap your hands and stamp you feet, And everybody sing

Ipswich, Ipswich kick that ball, Won't you get that goal for me, Gimme, Gimme Ipswich Town, Going to make some history, IPSWICH Ipswich, Ipswich get that goal, Won't you win that cup for me, IPSWICH, Gimme, Gimme Ipswich Town, The best at Wember-ley, IPSWICH

Super-blues, Are just the best, Super-blues, Well beat the rest, Super-blues, Are just the best

Ipswich, Ipswich kick that ball (get that goal), Won't you get that goal for me, IPSWICH Gimme, Gimme Ipswich Town (win that cup you see), IPSWICH

Ipswich, Ipswich kick that ball, Won't you get that goal for me, Gimme, Gimme Ipswich Town, Going to make some history, IPSWICH Ipswich, Ipswich get that goal, Won't you win that cup for me, IPSWICH, Gimme, Gimme Ipswich Town, The best at Wember-ley, IPSWICH

Genius! There is also another version with differecnt lyrics released around the time of our EUFA cup win of '81 this time eulogising various players: 'Warky moves like lightning, Whymark's on the mark' etc.

Unfortunately at the moment our club insists on playing a godawful sub-Quo cover of, inevitably, 'Singing the Blues'. No other team with a blue kit has ever used that one before. The club recently tried to 'jazz it up a bit' by sampling the chorus, time-stretching it to a fast house tempo and added a pumping 4-2-the-floor beat and repeating non stop for 10 minutes. Needless to say most people hated it and plans to use it before matches have been thankfully scr

What's a C**t?

Did he mean cunt?

Did you call me a cunt, you cunt?

Yes

Yes I did

You're a big cunty cunt. A dribbling, "ooh-where's-the-meat?"-style cunt, with all the cunty features of a flacid, gushing soda stream style mucky vulva that takes each and every opportunity to belch forth its tart ovu-froth onto the chins of each and every bleating male mouth.

That's more cunt than I can cope with at one sitting. hang on, shouldn't we be arguing about Sum 41 or something?

No. You should be placed solidly between two fat femme legs bolting forth sex-froth out of your vicious quantuum-filament-style slit, you big booby-tube knockerbollocks cunty cunt twat, Twatty Matt!

There have been some spectacular cunts in the history of planet Cunt. wars have been fought over Vulvae, some of which may have been all right for "a bit of a ride". None, however, compare to the syphilitic, effluent ridden, antiviral excuse of labia majora of which your face would entirely seem to consist.

You cunt

That doesn't stop you being a fish-spraying macro-cunt, you bulbous post-pelvic-bulge too-much-hair-and-the-stench-of-the-unwashed shite- o-cunt. You groin-o-slittage!

I feel I have given me and Matt's post-pub cunt-o-slagfest away here

Where is the guy that called me a cunt anyway?

However I'm quite proud of the phrase "you big booby-tube knockerbollocks cunty cunt twat"

Oh well thems' the breaks

We all are. Particularly your mum.

Oh she loves people talking about minge. She's mad for minge.

But where's the cunt that called me a cunt? I bet he's great at "computers"

Oh he's off doing the do at Parsec Dynamics. Where I'm sure people occasionally talk about 'tuppence'.

Spect so. He's still a cunt.

The worst kind. The kind of slappery slippery dodeco-quim that would be ball-less enough to refer to you as cunt when you blatantly aren't

I've read your bastard replies you Scottish boy! We'll march over your head.

Oh go away you little man!

Scottish boy as an insult? Well done, welll done....well done ) handclaps slowly)

when did ILM turn into a Peter Cook and Dudley Moore sketch?

God bless their souls

Pete & Dud that is. And I'm not really serious about the god bit

for my sins, i like the teen anthems swansea city thingy (c'mon, graham? alang? you going to back me up on this, its got helen love on the other side!)

otherwise, theres 'sunderland are back in the first division' from circa late 70s? may have been on that flare comp of footy songs, maybe. i'd love to hear that sunderland song again, the ipswich one wasn't bad either.

world in motion is good.

World in motion is the worst thing New Order ever did.

'Blue Is The Colour' is the only football song (until Wycombe invent one that is).

"winning is our aim"!!

You can't win em all by Brian Clough and Paper lace:

Hi It's Cloughie here, and football's my game.. But it's more than a game....It's responsible for bringing the people of the world together....It's a great equalizer...but remember..

You can't win em all, You can't win em all, Football's the game, I love most of all. But as everyone knows, That's how it goes. You can't win em all, You can't win em all.

Has anyone else heard this? it really has to be heard to be believed.

You say that you love me (say you love me) All of the time (all of the time) You say that you need me (say you need me) You'll always be mine (always be mine)

I'm feelin' glad all over Yes I'm-a glad all over Baby I'm glad all over So glad you're mine

I'll make you happy (make you happy) You'll never be blue (never be blue) You'll have no sorrow (have no sorrow) 'Cause I'll always be true (always be true)

And I'm feelin' glad all over Yes I'm-a glad all over Baby I'm-a glad all over So glad you're mine

Other girls may try to take me away (take me away) But you know, it's by your side I will stay I'll stay

Our love will last now (our love will last) Till the end of time (end of time) Because this love now (because this love) Is gonna be yours and mine (yours and mine)

And I'm feelin' glad all over Yes I'm-a glad all over Baby I'm glad all over So glad you're mine

Other girls may try to take me away (take me away) But you know, it's by your side I will stay I'll stay

All of our lives now (all of our lives) Till the end of time (end of time) Because this love now (because this love) Is only yours and mine (yours and mine)

And I'm feelin' glad all over Yes I'm-a glad all over Baby I'm-a glad all over So glad you're mine

I'm so glad you're mine now I'm so, I'm so glad you're mine I'm-a so glad you're mine now Whoa-whoa-whoa-whoa-whoa-whoa

"World In Motion" is not "Face-Up", RickyT.

search: the official colourbox world cup theme.

Search: Umbabarauma by Jorge Ben. In fact most of the songs on the Africa Brasil album are about football. Search: previous thread on this subject.

No, Dan, it's even worse

Search: The German National Football Team w/ the Village People, "Far Away in America", 1994.

Search: Dominick's "Football Story". Any record produced by Prince Jammy and toasted by a strange QPR fan with lines like "remember Peter Osgood and Alan Hudson" is OK by me.

"Oh, how I cannot bear the thought of you" sung like a cat being stuffed ass-first into a meat-grinder is patently worse than a bunch of soccer players chanting about England.

If only that were all it was, Dan. You forget that it also features John Barnes rapping and Keith Allen being all round horrible.

Some of my many favourite football records: Sharp As A Needle (among others) by Barmy Army, Goal or Romario by Depth Charge, Strachan by the Hitchers, We Stand Around by I Ludicrous, Roger Milla by Pepe Kalle, Pam Pam Cameroon by Macka B, Siyiya In France by Joe Mafile, Highlanders by Zexy Manatsa & the Green Arrows, Tornados Vs. Dynamos by the Real Sounds, Albania, Albania by Alexei Sayle and of course Substitute by the Who.

does anyone have a copy of the sunderland record i mention above?

I THOUGHT THIS THREAD WAS ABOUT FOOTBALL RABBIT :*(*((*

STAND UP TALL!