What is the stupidest Depeche Mode song?

At the moment I am thinking it is 'Dressed in Black.' It just SEEMS like pandering to the base, and whenever I hear it all I can imagine is some dude from alt.gothic trying to seduce someone with it on the laptop speakers & some nag champa in the air. Plus it is boring.

And I even like 'It's Called a Heart'!

Considering how affecting and/or perfect the final project is, "Everything Counts" is a little too on the nose. Same with "People Are People."

This is a brilliant thread idea!

I was always annoyed by "Condemnation". "My duty / Was always to beauty / And that was my crime." Oh, weh.

gotta be people are people

"People Are People"
"Pimpf"

"See You" and "It's Called A Heart" have always gotten on my nerves.

ICAH has that awful bass synth I've always associated with Howard Jones too. Ugh!

Ha 'Pimpf' is perfectly stupid. 'Condemnation' is a good example too, that fucking chorus of singers. I think 'People are People' doesn't really qualify bcz even tho it has silly lyrics it is a meteor of A+ pop!

Even though I love it, "What's your Name" is pretty stupid.

"Blasphemous Rumours" is stupid too, in that adolescent Show of Depth way.

'Work Hard' is 80% stupid.

Someone should draw a Depeche Mode Stupid-O-Meter.

If we can get some quantitative stupidity levels here I wld be happy to illustrate such a thing.

Someone should draw a Depeche Mode Stupid-O-Meter.

― I'm crossing over into enterprise (Alfred, Lord Sotosyn), Friday, May 1, 2009 1:43 PM (1 minute ago) Bookmark Suggest Ban Permalink

there needs to be a plot where one axis is "stupid lyrics" and one axis is "stupid music"

OTM wrt Pimpf

"Blasphemous Rumours" is stupid too, in that adolescent Show of Depth way.

I remember thinking this song was SO DEEP when I was 13, so mission accomplished.

I really hate "It's Called a Heart".

The thing about "Blasphemous Rumors" is that it is brilliantly stupid. Its relentless naivety is part of its charm.

"It's Called a Heart", OTOH, is a big mess of nonsense that really should send everyone involved off cringing in a corner.

I really hate "It's Called a Heart".

The band hate "It's Called a Heart" too, to their credit.

Martin's lyrical propensity for 'serious angst-ridden Essex person is serious' reductions of big issues is perfect because of the way he always finds pop hooks to weld them to. That said probably the last time he tried for sociopolitical comment was "New Dress" from Black Celebration -- then again after that where exactly could you go?

(It's actually what makes a number of his more recent songs affecting in contrast, kinda the equivalent of Dave developing some real singing chops. A song like "Precious" is emphatically unstupid in translating his feelings about his divorce and how to tell his children about it all into something that is a short pop song lyric -- it's no less reductionist but it's remarkably open-ended as opposed to many of his capitalize-underline-add an exclamation point approaches.)

The band is also pretty sick of "People Are People," no? Or were for a long while?

Very sick of it, haven't played it much in years IIRC. (Maybe since 1990?) It's a pity because musically it's *such* a remarkable song on many levels but there you go.

It's actually what makes a number of his more recent songs affecting in contrast, kinda the equivalent of Dave developing some real singing chops. A song like "Precious" is emphatically unstupid in translating his feelings about his divorce and how to tell his children about it all into something that is a short pop song lyric

Hmm. Had no idea it was about a divorce and children. Thanks!

x-post Oh, yeah - the doc segment on that song was sort of eye-opening. Was that the one where they mic'd the huge speakers blasting in the downstairs studio to get the bass drum sound?

Hmm. Had no idea it was about a divorce and children. Thanks!

It didn't click with me at first either but shortly after it came out Martin mentioned it in a few interviews. Dan to his credit figured it out almost immediately IIRC.

Was that the one where they mic'd the huge speakers blasting in the downstairs studio to get the bass drum sound?

The very same.

I think the best early counterexample to the broad brush Show of Depth "Here are my thoughts on these big issues!" songs, ie where Martin actually finds a way to summarize and simplify, is "Get the Balance Right" -- it may be no less Show of Depth and the basic idea may be "Won't Get Fooled Again" gone digital but:

* Instead of it being about warning yourself not to fall for someone saying one thing and doing another it's about you doing that yourself, no matter how idealistically you try and live and do things.

* The 'almost predictable' part right after setting out a basic 'rise high/fall low' trope, and then repeating the 'almost' part for emphasis -- just a little hanging uncertainty.

May not be great literature per se but I've heard way worse. And it's one of their best opening hooks.

I often love how DM will turn lyrical stupidity into a virtue; my classic example is "Shame".

I actually like how in the documentaries Alan Wilder admitted his lyrical attempts at Big Issues were pretty LOLworthy.

"NEW DRESS" YOU GUYS. "NEW DRESS"!!!

"I don't care if you're going nowhere/Just take good care of the world"

That's not awful!

someone will probably come in here and write "But Not Tonight," but, wow, I love that song.

That line isn't awful, no; some of the lines from the rest of the song...?

"NEW DRESS" YOU GUYS. "NEW DRESS"!!!

I mentioned that!

"But Not Tonight" is great. So is "Pimpf"! I like the pompous, operatic DM -- I'll stan for "Kaleid" too!

I mentioned that!

It can't be mentioned enough! It's incredibly stupid both lyrically and musically, as opposed to the other "socio-political" songs mentioned here ("Get the Balance Right" = dumb lyrics, OK music ... "Blasphemous Rumours" = dumb but charming lyrics, fantastic musically).

Anybody thinking "Kaleid" is somehow stupid at all can, you know, leave.

"Pimpf" at the end of Music is almost too much (part of the charm) and the promo film that Corbijn directed even more so thanks to the synchronized chanting by the band, though doubtless that's even more part of the point. BUT -- as the opening music on that tour and as the first thing you hear on the 101 album as it builds to a climax while 50,000 people are screaming their heads off = perfection.

Exactly. It's not a matter of it being stupid so much as the right kind of stupid.

John the Revelator.

It just SEEMS like pandering to the base, and whenever I hear it all I can imagine is some dude from alt.gothic trying to seduce someone with it on the laptop speakers & some nag champa in the air. Plus it is boring.

^^^ this is my #1 problem with later Depeche Mode

Dressed in Black is so not a stupid song. The melody doesn't develop in an obvious way, the arrangement is quite sophisticated, and the lyric is a decent stab at the pyschosexual/confessional theme.

On the other hand, "All I wanna do is see you / Don't you know that it's true?" is quite perfectly moronic. It's very appropriate that the rise and fall of the chorus melody is reminiscent of the old "Now I know my ABC" jingle.

It just SEEMS like pandering to the base, and whenever I hear it all I can imagine is some dude from alt.gothic trying to seduce someone with it on the laptop speakers & some nag champa in the air

Um, hasn't this ALWAYS been Depeche Mode's m.o.? That's why they court ridiculousness so often. At their peak they wrote deep-sounding songs because it made their female fans feel special.

So Gore's choice of lyrical themes was entirely calculated? I don't buy that for a moment.

The act of writing IS calculation.

(but, yes, my line above is just my interpretation)

and not, necessarily, a diss.

"dressed in black" is one of many examples that martin gore really should've scored a musical by now

You have suggested the Depeche equivalent to Mamma Mia! to my brain and I fear.

THAT'S the first thing to come to mind when you think of a musical??????

Not sure it's a case of DM pandering to the base so much as accepting their limitations. Their Serious Issue stuff has always clunked lyrically ("a career/in Korea" springs to mind) whereas their sin/defiance/repentance/healing-power-of-love schtick is sometimes brilliant and at worst solid, hence why (apart from Precious) it's practically all they write now. I'd be interested to know if Martin had ever sat down and forced himself to write with different themes or narrative voices and found that it didn't work, or whether he just does what he does without analysing it particularly deeply. I do wish I could go back to Construction Time Again and Some Great Reward with the proverbial red pen and rescue some musically astonishing tracks from their lyrical howlers, People Are People being the classic example. But maybe that's part of their charm.

Brilliant thread. Too many to choose from.

Already invoked. And blame Alan for that one (and he will accept it!)

"World Full of Nothing" is beautiful! This is a case where the clumsiness of the lyrics really work in the song's favour, since it's supposed to be about adolescent fumbling/awkwardness anyhow. It's fresh-faced and innocent in a way that DM hadn't been since the days of "See You" (which might be innocent, but it's also too sugary to be affecting in any meaningful way). If "World Full of Nothing" is stupid, then so is "The Things You Said" (which won't get any stupid votes, I'm sure), because isn't "The Things You Said" = "World Full of Nothing" + one more year of high school?

neil tennant: “getting away with it (which i wrote most of the words of) is looking at morrissey’s persona of being miserable and all the rest of it, and saying that he’s been getting away with it for years. it’s meant to be humorous. what bugged me about the shoe-gazers always looking really miserable is that people think someone like that is really serious. it’s something that endlessly bugs me in pop music—that someone with the style of being serious is always accepted as being serious.”

Morrissey as a shoegazer is an amusing concept.

"Everyday is Like Pedals"

Weird, but this thread is making me realize how much I love these guys a lot more than the average ILM DM thread. :) It's like picking on your little brother.

Always thought "Monument" was a stupid if enjoyable song, nothing matches the chorus for simplistic stupidness. "Work Hard" is so ridiculous, especially the sound of a broken back. "Breathe" might take my vote though, because the lyrics sound like their early albums but Martin should have definitely known better by then.

"Work Hard" is probably my vote (although the choices are richly plentiful and varied).

work hard is so friggin' cool musically though. the 12 inch version is massive.

"i think someone on here wrote that martin gore was writing "somebody" in the style of morrissey"

i'd probably like the song if mozzerooni had sung it. but he would have added better lyrics too.

haha yes "monument"!!! "anything passes when you need glasses". right-o. but again, an example of stupid lyrics saved by absolutely jaw droppingly genius production

"Glad to see Ned's love for Get The Balance Right; an oft-overlooked gem, that one"

i thought this was a huge hit that everyone loved. or is that just my dream world?

this thread made me dig out that french EPs i have. the half live/half single/remix ones from the 80's.

everything counts (the 12 inch long version) will always be number one in my book. i couldn't possibly love anything more. oh, wait, wrong thread.

If anyone needed convincing, this thread shows that "A Broken Frame" is far and away the stupidest DM album. Even awesome stuff like "Leave In Silence" is still a bit stupid, thanks to the overdramatic lyrics.

I would like to submit "Everything Counts." I never get tired of it, in fact it's my favorite of all their songs, and certainly it's completely idiotic.

i thought this was a huge hit that everyone loved. or is that just my dream world?

I'm not sure how it was received at the time -- I was too young, and not paying attention -- but I don't think history's been kind to it; it never seems to get much of a mention these days. (Then again: maybe I'm still not paying attention!)

everything counts (the 12 inch long version) will always be number one in my book

Ah, god, yes. Wow.

If anyone needed convincing, this thread shows that "A Broken Frame" is far and away the stupidest DM album. Even awesome stuff like "Leave In Silence" is still a bit stupid, thanks to the overdramatic lyrics

Again, I'm dredging this up from the recesses of my mind so it might be wrong ... but wasn't part of the problem that Martin, suddenly finding himself responsible for writing all the material, ran out of ideas and ended up recycling a couple of things he'd written when he was 16? I'm sure A Photograph Of You is one; See You might be the other? (Looks hopefully in Ned's direction for confirmation.)

That's correct about "See You". I'm not not sure about "A Photograph of You", but someone else here will know.

Yes, that's correct about both those songs -- there's at least one other song that fits in that category too.

I'm not sure how it was received at the time -- I was too young, and not paying attention -- but I don't think history's been kind to it; it never seems to get much of a mention these days. (Then again: maybe I'm still not paying attention!)

If the Construction Time Again documentary is any indication, Derrick May says "Get The Balance Right," especially in 12" form, was massively popular in Detroit. So draw your connections from there! As it was never on an album proper that probably explains why it's sometimes missed (as is, sadly, "Shake the Disease").

otm.
'Get the Balance right' has always been one of my favorite DM songs (and maybe the point IMO where they started coming up with really cool sound textures) but being a stand alone single and apparently not a band favorite (according to documentary if memory serves) means it's a bit of an obscurity.

That opening synth line is just *perfect* -- and I have a secret theory that it and the song as a whole is what Trent R. uses as a reference point for a lot of his Depeche-referencing stuff ("Ringfinger" and the distorted synth line that appears towards the conclusion of "Closer" in particular).

it got played a lot on my local college radio station. depeche mode was massive on that station from the very beginning (as was yaz from the time of their first single on). get the balance right was also included on the people are people comp in 84 and this was a must have album for new wavers where i was. then a year later in 85 the catching up with...comp came out (i bought that one immediately) and you got flexible and shake the disease on that. flexible, on the college radio station i'm talking about, was played TO DEATH. one of the most popular b-sides i can remember from back then.

get the balance right was also included on the people are people comp in 84 and this was a must have album for new wavers where i was.

Yeah for the longest time I thought that was a semi-real studio album; turns out it was an odds-and-sods comp for the American (and Japanese?) market. Great cover, though:

http://music.porkrind.org/Depeche%20Mode/People%20Are%20People/cover.jpg

That's interesting to learn "Flexible" was so huge! It's one of their oddest songs, still catchy of course.

again, the long version, the combination mix, just genius. might be my 2nd fave depeche moment. or maybe it's even tied with everything counts. i can't choose between them.

VERY depeche-friendly part of the country i came from. that station even used to play the hell out of the assembly single when it came out! they were vince clarke partisans. just can't get enough was probably the first single i heard and loved and had to have. or maybe new life. i can't remember.

wasn't it specifically the intro that detroit djs would supposedly edit and loop in the 80s?

the middle eight in this song is sublime, especially on the combination mix where it extends for a minute or so

I couldn't find any more general Depeche Mode threads to post this on so I thought I'd ass up the one I started.

Ok, is it just me, or does the image on this DM shirt look like a vulva?

http://www.everythingenglish.com/catalog/dmexcitedslvlss.jpg

"so excited that my cock burst it's seams"

It's Anton Corbijn = sex is in there somewhere.

is there something to do
is there something to do
is there something to do
is there something to dooo-hooo

new dress is pretty dumb

"If You Want"

Exercise your basic right
We could build a building site

"There's something beating here inside my body and it's called a heart."

Lyrically "It's Called a Heart" is obviously the stupidest, and I know Martin Gore really, really, really regrets writing it.

I think "Pimpf" goes away with the musically stupidest though. "Photograph", for all its naivety, is a cute little popsong that wouldn't have sounded too bad on "Speak & Spell" or a Yazoo album even. It didn't fit into the otherwise bleak "A Broken Frame" though (as didn't "The Meaning Of Love" - "See You" is at least minor key most of the way through)

That amount of regret is so funny. I am now even more glad the song exists.

Strange that this is the first mention of "The Meaning Of Love" btw. In terms of stupid lyrics, that one is pretty high on the list.

"Pimpf" I always considered their equiv of "Chant of the Ever Circling Skeletal Family" – a tacked-on silly thing to end an album with more than an actual song.

It is a tacked-on silly thing on an album, it is a monumental goddamn thing to start a Rose Bowl show with.

Actually, "Pimpf" sounds like the soundtrack to one of those dance shows that are usually being performed in the break during the Eurovision Song Contest.

Yeah I just listened to PIMPF again and it is p fucking majestic!

I'm not sure why "What's Your Name?" was made.

I hate "Sweetest Perfection" too.

The bit with Pimpf in 101 is one of my favourite bits of any film ever, must have seen it 100 times. Just watching them walk from backstage is so exciting to me. This was also the first song i heard as i put the needle down on my first ever self-purchased DM record (101 obvs) so it's never seemed stupid it just seems.. amazing!

"What's Your Name" and "It's Called A Heart" are both great!

Stupidest lyric from the 80s might be:

"Don't turn this way
Don't turn that way
Straight down the middle until next Thursday"

I have to quote these lyrics again:

"Someone who'll stand by my side
And give me support
And in return
She'll get my support"

I always knew that DM made a lot of dumb songs; reading this thread made me realize they're ALL pretty stupid. One of my personal favorites was always "Blasphomous Rumors" since it's such a clunky title to put in a chorus.

I do seriously believe that you are a heartless jerk if you make fun of the song "Somebody"

i'm with ya, dan.

'Pimpf' certainly has the stupidest video...
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ojR-XRt4rrA

"There's something beating here inside my body and it's called a heart."

― Mr. Snrub, Wednesday, December 29, 2010 10:10 PM (Yesterday) Bookmark

vs. NIN - "Grey would be the color if I had a heart"

Oh, never mind, we've been doing it wrong.

http://www.mirror.co.uk/news/uk-news/youll-never-guess-pop-band-4743599

Supercalifragilisticexpialidocious beats Depeche Mode easily and gets 15.9 on the Coleman-Liau Index.

(Well, OK, I have no idea how the Mirror went about normalizing the punctuation in their dataset. Fools need to put their datasets and software on github so independent parties can verify their results.)

the equivalent to a 15-year-old.

lol, naturally

dire straits at #3. aren't all their songs about watching other people play rock 'n' roll?

Some are about installing appliances

One person's wince-inducing song is another person's song used to propose, I guess.

Holy shit, that's awesome!!!