You're fave band decides to hold a concert in the fecking forests, hoping to play to 5000 people at each gig despite a notable slip in their popularity. So you naturally think: 'Hmm, if The Pet Shop Boys or The Human League played in way out places I bet they'd play to a fair few folk as well - not cos the people would be fans of them but because it would be a rare night out to see a once big band'.
Of course this crossed my mind... but I never kinda realised EXACTLY what it would be like.
So my girlfriend and I get the bus to Elgin (in the Scottish highlands) from Dundee. I don't live anywhere near Dundee so we drive there. Or rather she drives there. And it's bad (long story) but we get there eventually.
Then the bus is late. And to make matters worse it's full of Weejis (Glasweigens). And 4 particularly odious people are in the bus... three of whom have won a contest and probably don't know who Pulp are. The three hour bus trip means we miss the supporting acts and have to put up with officially the biggest twat I've ever met (clad in sunglasses and flirting with a very ugly ginger bird the whole trip) playing bus leader as he feeds himself with more drugs and drink which the bus driver ignores. "Hallo, who loves the bus driver" he shouts over and over to less and less response. And he sings a few songs for us. Which is nice. "Yuuuu've lost that lovin' feeeeeelin' now it's gone, gone, gone" etc etc
By the time we get to Elgin he's more than a twat. He needs his head inserted up his arsehole and drowned in his own poo.
So we miss the support acts cos of the crappy bus company and then Pulp come on. But the audience is VERY weird - bikers in leather, middle aged female groupies with tatoos, skinheads, metal heads (one wannabe head banger stood in the one spot and banged his head for the entire fucking concert. What WAS the point of that???)... urgh. Don't think anyone was interested in Pulp at all, and one idiot even hit Jarvis with a missle.
Pulp looked pretty peeved in my opinion and their 80 minute set was short and sweet with little in the way of surprises (I Want You for the Freaks album was played and they belted out Help the Aged for the first time in a while).
A six foot skinhead with a missing tooth groped my girlfriend's bust and then pulled a middle aged biker woman telling her "I'm badder than Mike Tyson". Yes really.
We left the arseholes on the bus behind because they were probably dead or something. So if you're reading this: HAHAHAHA hope you've managed to walk back to Glasgow from Elgin ya twats.
One of them even conked out about three songs in and ended up taking a piss behind our bus later after talking about pros of being a punk lesbian or something. Batty woman.
Anyway, that was that, and let this be a lesson to any aspiring bands: don't play in stupid places cos the crowd will consist of morons.
― Calum Robert, Sunday, 23 June 2002 00:00 (twenty-three years ago)
― Tim DiGravina, Sunday, 23 June 2002 00:00 (twenty-three years ago)
― mark s, Sunday, 23 June 2002 00:00 (twenty-three years ago)
Really, grow up and don't insult me with that shit.
― Ally C, Sunday, 23 June 2002 00:00 (twenty-three years ago)
― Dr. C, Sunday, 23 June 2002 00:00 (twenty-three years ago)
― Alexander Blair, Sunday, 23 June 2002 00:00 (twenty-three years ago)
It's just when you find yourself not watching the gig but rather watching fat drugged up arseholes stumbling around because you really don't want them to tumble onto you (and they try, bless them they try, to bounce during the faster songs - leading to disaster) and you have morons trying to fondle your girlfriend (and anything else in a skirt).
Basically, if they want to spend their time throwing beer about and pushing people over and throwing shit on stage and just being a pain in the arse then that's up to them but some of us like to enjoy our gigs you know?
Reasons not to hold a rock gig in a forest clearing:
1) men drinking beer then peeing against trees all round the clearing.
2) F*restry C*mmission deciding to host a gig so far from anywhere that everyone has to drive there. But then FC = environmental antiChrist I seem to have gathered from reading about their policies somewhere. (Please don't sue me!)
3) See comment re: not being enough beer.
4) My girlfriend reckons the birds went beserk during Feeling Called Love -- surely that can't be right?
Reasons to hold a gig in a forest clearing:
1) SOLSTICE!
2) Erm, fresh air so you can't smell the audience.
3) Going swimming in the sea afterwards and standing around on the beach until it's your birthday at midnight!
― alext, Monday, 24 June 2002 00:00 (twenty-three years ago)
I saw Pulp at Brixton last year and they were first class, I also saw them at T in the Park in 98 and they were on fire. The Elgin gig was good, but the audience was made of arseholes and I dunno about you but when I spent big bucks to see a band I want to enjoy it and remember it. The mentality of getting wasted during a concert is beyond me...
― Calum Robert, Monday, 24 June 2002 00:00 (twenty-three years ago)
I think I pick gigs to go and see based on the overall experience of the event, so a big part of the attraction was having to get to the middle of nowhere, and getting to spend time with some people I like loads who I don't see often enough. The wierdness of the crowd, and the kind of make-shift atmosphere of the whole thing added to the fun for me.
We stood about half-way back and nodded along rather than danced, so didn't see any trouble, apart from beer-can throwing, which is kinda tedious.
― g, Tuesday, 25 June 2002 00:00 (twenty-three years ago)
― Lord Custos III, Tuesday, 25 June 2002 00:00 (twenty-three years ago)
― gareth, Tuesday, 25 June 2002 00:00 (twenty-three years ago)
― Norman phay, Wednesday, 26 June 2002 00:00 (twenty-three years ago)
― Lord Custos III, Wednesday, 26 June 2002 00:00 (twenty-three years ago)
― Norman Phay, Wednesday, 26 June 2002 00:00 (twenty-three years ago)
― mark s, Wednesday, 26 June 2002 00:00 (twenty-three years ago)
― ciaran, Wednesday, 26 June 2002 00:00 (twenty-three years ago)
― alext, Thursday, 27 June 2002 00:00 (twenty-three years ago)
― g, Thursday, 27 June 2002 00:00 (twenty-three years ago)
― Sterling Clover, Thursday, 27 June 2002 00:00 (twenty-three years ago)
I'm not sure I know what Custos means by 'naughty' (tho' I am sure I don't want to know), but the Kinks had a number two hit (in 1970) w/ a song abt a transvestite, and Ray Davies performed it for the Queen this year... So yeah I dunno...
― Andrew L, Thursday, 27 June 2002 00:00 (twenty-three years ago)
― Lord Custos III, Thursday, 27 June 2002 00:00 (twenty-three years ago)
Jarvis is one of maybe two or three people whose lyrics I will actively seek out (though in accordance with his wishes, I never read them while the songs are playing ;-)). Seems to me that his songs are trying to attempt more of a pseudo-realistic voyeurism -- in otherwards, within the context of a fictional narrative, he's not aiming at something glamourous or thrillingly forbidden about sex and relationships, but trying to convey the senses about how things 'really' are and how they can go wrong. Certainly that's what he's aiming for with songs like "Live Bed Show" and "Underwear," for instance -- the idea being that we the listeners are supposed to be getting off on the sigh of realistic acknowledgment about the material.
― Ned Raggett, Thursday, 27 June 2002 00:00 (twenty-three years ago)
-- mark s (mar...) (webmail), June 25th, 2002 8:00 PM. (link)
ha
― amateur!!!st (amateurist), Sunday, 26 September 2004 04:34 (twenty-one years ago)
---
jesus how horrible people a bit different from you
-- mark s (mar...), June 23rd, 2002.
Yeah I love seeing my girlfriend being groped by a big drunk skinhead and two pissed up men trying feebly to put touch her.
-- Calum Robert (calumr...), June 23rd, 2002.
― Ned Raggett (Ned), Sunday, 26 September 2004 04:38 (twenty-one years ago)
― amateur!!!st (amateurist), Sunday, 26 September 2004 04:38 (twenty-one years ago)
― amateur!!!st (amateurist), Sunday, 26 September 2004 04:39 (twenty-one years ago)
― Ned Raggett (Ned), Sunday, 26 September 2004 04:40 (twenty-one years ago)
― amateur!!!st (amateurist), Sunday, 26 September 2004 04:41 (twenty-one years ago)
― amateur!!!st (amateurist), Sunday, 26 September 2004 04:42 (twenty-one years ago)
― Ned Raggett (Ned), Sunday, 26 September 2004 04:45 (twenty-one years ago)
― everything (everything), Tuesday, 29 August 2006 21:51 (nineteen years ago)