Search and Destroy: Mariah Carey

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You asked, you shall receive - is Mariah a worthless piece of crap, worthy of bringing before the Geneva Crts for crimes against humanity, or should we move north and hang Celine DIon?

Geoff, Wednesday, 2 May 2001 00:00 (seventeen years ago) Permalink

Making dogs' heads explode with her shrill voice -- GUILTY! Casting herself as a 'hip hop diva/prostitute' -- GUILTY! Behaving like a spoiled child and making a genuine ass of herelf -- GUILTY.

alex in nyc, Wednesday, 2 May 2001 00:00 (seventeen years ago) Permalink

Completely worthless, but a marketing triumph. Name another female pop star who is less fun than this one. Zero personality. The only thing she has going is that she's soon going to have more number ones than the Beatles or Elvis.

Mark, Wednesday, 2 May 2001 00:00 (seventeen years ago) Permalink

Can I just ask why people do this to me? I can say, NOT IN ANY WAY ASKING FOR A THREAD TO BE STARTED AS I'D DO IT MYSELF, "Jeez, it's getting to the point where we'll have a That Dog: Classic Or Dud!" and someone will virtually immediately post "That Dog: Classic Or Dud?" Does this work with bands I actually like? Let's try it: "Jeez, it's nearly to the point where we'll have a Search And Destroy: Manic Street Preachers!" and "I really hope there's never, ever a Spiritualized: Classic Or Dud? thread". It just makes me laugh a bit because it's every single time I've done it, and then a few of the FTers blame me :)

Anyhow, if we must: Search: Fantasy Destroy: Mariah Carey.

Ally, Wednesday, 2 May 2001 00:00 (seventeen years ago) Permalink

Dear lord. I had to listen to that butchering of "Without You" the other day (that was her, wasn't it?). I shall pretend the question was not asked.

Ned Raggett, Wednesday, 2 May 2001 00:00 (seventeen years ago) Permalink

That's because Mariah Carey is way funnier than Spiritualized ! So is That Dog :).

Patrick, Wednesday, 2 May 2001 00:00 (seventeen years ago) Permalink

I liked the one where she was captured by gangsters and spent the video changing outfits and escaping from an island...so search that video! Destroy...her ability to emit a high frequency squeal...I think she could KO the Fantastic Four with that!

james e l, Wednesday, 2 May 2001 00:00 (seventeen years ago) Permalink

That Dog are funny because they're called That Dog. What kind of godawful name is that? It's nearly as bad as The The or The Band or P. Diddy.

Ally, Wednesday, 2 May 2001 00:00 (seventeen years ago) Permalink

There's a new band called "the Music" I bet they stink.

james e l, Wednesday, 2 May 2001 00:00 (seventeen years ago) Permalink

Search: "Vision Of Love". Call me out of it, but this really is her best single. Best song, best use of her voice, best emotional impact... I get chills just thinking about it.

Destroy: "Dream Lover". Oh, look. Everything detestable about Mariah in one handy package. How convenient.

Dan Perry, Wednesday, 2 May 2001 00:00 (seventeen years ago) Permalink

I'm just going to talk about That Dog because thinking about Mariah makes me feel queasy. I only have known of 2 people, ever, who have liked them. One was this really weird girl who would talk about stalking Graham from Blur, and the other one Cannot Be Named. Enough said...

Nicole, Wednesday, 2 May 2001 00:00 (seventeen years ago) Permalink

Why would you stalk Graham when Alex is there? Jeez.

Ally, Wednesday, 2 May 2001 00:00 (seventeen years ago) Permalink

I think I have heard one or two of her records, and found them pretty unenjoyable. Don't know this stuff too well, though.

the pinefox, Wednesday, 2 May 2001 00:00 (seventeen years ago) Permalink

I used to like That Dog. I can see them being resurrected in 2025 as a hip cult item, like Shuggie Otis or Lee Hazelwood or something, as a look-how-weird-the-mid-90s were kind of thing.

Patrick, Wednesday, 2 May 2001 00:00 (seventeen years ago) Permalink

Agreed, Alex always looked way better than Graham. I don't like Graham at all. But who are That Dog anyway?

the pinefox, Wednesday, 2 May 2001 00:00 (seventeen years ago) Permalink

Search: Heartbreaker Videos (both), Greatest Hits, early "look" Destroy: Music Box. Midperiod stupid down-home look.

Sterling Clover, Wednesday, 2 May 2001 00:00 (seventeen years ago) Permalink

She had a downhome look ?!?

Patrick, Wednesday, 2 May 2001 00:00 (seventeen years ago) Permalink

i think sterling speaks of the look in the "dream lover" video in which mariah sports a t-shirt, tied in the fashion of midwestern gals, and cut-off jean shorts.

like dan, i'd go with "vision of love" as my search pick. her vocalizing is quite fine on it, i must say, and even though it's in 12/8, it's still a good song. though i wonder if i liked it if it had been done by "mariah carey," if you get me. probably not because the mariah of today, with her millions of dollars, boy toys, and hoopties, has long forgotten what it was like to sing something like she meant it.

fred solinger, Wednesday, 2 May 2001 00:00 (seventeen years ago) Permalink

Search: the Tom Tom club sample on "Fantasy", also "Vision Of Love" is passable.

Destroy: Her boobs. You definitely don't need to SEARCH for those.

EdwardO, Wednesday, 2 May 2001 00:00 (seventeen years ago) Permalink

I'm surprised by how few of her hits I can hum (despite ample exposure to all). This suggests melodies are generally weak. Ergo, the mega- multi-platinum sales mystify me - how's that done without catchy tunes? (Just marketing?) All the videos (from "Honey" onwards) after leaving Mottola, straightening her hair, hitching her skirt up, getting a boobjob, and growing a booty, are quite spectacular: softcore porn; no complaints.

AP, Thursday, 3 May 2001 00:00 (seventeen years ago) Permalink

When I answered this yesterday I was confused. I thought that Mariah Carey was Celine Dion. Today I remembered what Mariah Carey looked like. It's true, she is gorgeous: or she was on this LP I saw with her in a Santa suit. Still don't think I've heard her records, though.

the pinefox, Thursday, 3 May 2001 00:00 (seventeen years ago) Permalink

Are you sure it wasn't Burl Ives in that Santa suit?

Nicole, Thursday, 3 May 2001 00:00 (seventeen years ago) Permalink

four months pass...
I met Mariah back stage one day and fucked her in her ass. She absolutely loved it and asked me to do it to her again after the show. She really does have a small, skinny ass and I wish she would clean it more often.

dave swade, Wednesday, 5 September 2001 00:00 (sixteen years ago) Permalink

Now, that's a post.

Ally, Wednesday, 5 September 2001 00:00 (sixteen years ago) Permalink

five months pass...
mariah....search: her dignity, you won't find it. destroy: all her personal records so humankind can say she never existed.

was that very harsh?

That Dog; haven't they ceased to exist? don't stalk alex, he's dangerous.

xx

Fear, Sunday, 17 February 2002 01:00 (sixteen years ago) Permalink

I have to thank you for resurrecting this thread if only because I missed the dirty one before.

Dan Perry, Sunday, 17 February 2002 01:00 (sixteen years ago) Permalink

one year passes...
Yes. Mariah Carey should definitely be searched and destroyed!

Geir Hongro (GeirHong), Wednesday, 16 April 2003 11:37 (fifteen years ago) Permalink

....but how can you destroy something that's not alive in the first place?

She should be destroyed if only for showing those monstrosities she calls breasts off at every opportunity.... vile lollopy hanging beasts.

Remind me of my Gran's.......

russ t, Wednesday, 16 April 2003 12:27 (fifteen years ago) Permalink

Being physically unattractive doesn't qualify for destruction in itself. If that was the case, then Joni Mitchell would have been the first to destroy.

Geir Hongro (GeirHong), Wednesday, 16 April 2003 16:46 (fifteen years ago) Permalink

two years pass...
Best revive of the day.

The Ghost of Dan Perry (Dan Perry), Tuesday, 19 April 2005 16:42 (thirteen years ago) Permalink

Wow, this is an old one.

wtf are you on about geir, joni mitchell is very attractive!!

Pashmina (Pashmina), Tuesday, 19 April 2005 16:44 (thirteen years ago) Permalink

Search and Destroy: Mariah Carey

Sounds like a good idea. Tell me when you find her, and I'll help you destroy her.

Geir Hongro (GeirHong), Tuesday, 19 April 2005 16:55 (thirteen years ago) Permalink

I don't think you can actually destroy things with your penis, Geir.

The Ghost of Dan Perry (Dan Perry), Tuesday, 19 April 2005 17:02 (thirteen years ago) Permalink

emancipation of mimi is wonderful. top 3 for me for sure.

Jams Murphy (ystrickler), Tuesday, 19 April 2005 17:29 (thirteen years ago) Permalink

With her last album, Mariah Carey has gone from awful (Adult Contemporary) to even worse (contemporary hip-hop-influenced R&B)

Geir Hongro (GeirHong), Tuesday, 19 April 2005 22:00 (thirteen years ago) Permalink

Jams OTM! & so is Geir, in his "special" way.

David R. (popshots75`), Tuesday, 19 April 2005 22:03 (thirteen years ago) Permalink

That bonus track is KILLER.

Lethal Dizzle (djdee2005), Tuesday, 19 April 2005 23:45 (thirteen years ago) Permalink

Is anything on it as good as her awesome "Funkin 4 Jamaica" "cover" collab-o with Mystikal?

The first single didn't do much for me.

"With her last album, Mariah Carey has gone from awful (Adult Contemporary) to even worse (contemporary hip-hop-influenced R&B)"

Wasn't this true from Butterfly onwards though? I remember "Honey" being the decisive step towards "hip-hop-influenced R&B".

Tim Finney (Tim Finney), Wednesday, 20 April 2005 01:15 (thirteen years ago) Permalink

Yeah, & I'm not that familiar w/ those albums post-"Honey", but she usually sticks at least one shitass weepy ballad in the mix. Ain't none of that here - well, balladry, yeah (I think - haven't listened in a while), but the GOOD type.

David R. (popshots75`), Wednesday, 20 April 2005 02:01 (thirteen years ago) Permalink

"Honey" didn't have the same kind of über-annoying staccato beat that her current stuff does. Plus the style still left room for a proper melody. I consider "Money" among her more decent moments.

Geir Hongro (GeirHong), Wednesday, 20 April 2005 09:26 (thirteen years ago) Permalink

obv search 'all i want for christmas is you' - it's my favourite christmas song, most years!

pete b. (pete b.), Wednesday, 20 April 2005 09:34 (thirteen years ago) Permalink

That Dog?

Daniel_Rf (Daniel_Rf), Wednesday, 20 April 2005 10:34 (thirteen years ago) Permalink

"Search: "Vision Of Love". Call me out of it, but this really is her best single. Best song, best use of her voice, best emotional impact... I get chills just thinking about it."

Dan Perry OTM in 2001.

scott seward (scott seward), Wednesday, 20 April 2005 10:40 (thirteen years ago) Permalink

SEARCH: the Def Club remix of "Dreamlover"

Mr. Snrub (Mr. Snrub), Wednesday, 20 April 2005 11:01 (thirteen years ago) Permalink

"stay the night" off of mimi is her greatest song yet. it's a really sad album though -- mariah isn't allowed to be mariah anymore.

Jams Murphy (ystrickler), Wednesday, 20 April 2005 13:06 (thirteen years ago) Permalink

The video for "Without You" is an utter atrocity - AN UTTER ATROCITY!!! It's the way that she stomps her feet, waves her hands, her face contorted in agony (as if she was having her liver removed without the benefits of anaesthetic) in order to show us just how emotional she feels when she sings. What's almost as bad is the audience response - who holler and applaud and delight in every single vocal inflection (or whatever it is that she does.) Whenever it's on tv i can't help but watch it - even though it's the most toe-curlingly, cringe-inducing thing i've ever seen.

search: Mariah Carey
when you find her: DESTROY! DESTROY! EXTERMINATE! EXTERMINATE!

Neil FC (Neil FC), Wednesday, 20 April 2005 13:14 (thirteen years ago) Permalink

Oh please. She's great. I don't care for the ballads, too mushy mushy, but the rest is ace, including her out of control personality. You gotta a love a woman who apparently "doesn't do stairs" (-> whatever THAT means) and demands puppies so as to appear nicer.

nathalie doing a soft foot shuffle (stevie nixed), Wednesday, 20 April 2005 13:21 (thirteen years ago) Permalink

Several years on, I upgrade "Vision Of Love" to mega-classic status, and remember that "Love Takes Time" wasn't half bad either. I felt sorry for her, she had dead eyes all through her mega-stardom-years...

edward o (edwardo), Wednesday, 20 April 2005 13:22 (thirteen years ago) Permalink

R&B in general needs to get over this "ballad" thing - bless DC (NOT BEYONCE) & their producers for finding a way to do slow-burnin' songs that don't get stuck in the mud.

&, yeah, to piggyback SS's endorsement of Pope Dang, "Vision of Love" makes her first album.

David R. (popshots75`), Wednesday, 20 April 2005 13:25 (thirteen years ago) Permalink

how bout that cover of Take a look at me now?

Surmounter, Friday, 12 September 2008 22:49 (nine years ago) Permalink

Rainbow and Glitter are the only two albums of hers I can listen to ... major portions of. I guess Butterfly has its moments too.

Eric H., Saturday, 13 September 2008 01:24 (nine years ago) Permalink

i did not know you liked rainbow :)

Surmounter, Saturday, 13 September 2008 01:43 (nine years ago) Permalink

I met Mariah back stage one day and fucked her in her ass. She absolutely loved it and asked me to do it to her again after the show. She really does have a small, skinny ass and I wish she would clean it more often.

peace, love, and ban deeznuts (The Reverend), Saturday, 13 September 2008 01:55 (nine years ago) Permalink

:(

Surmounter, Saturday, 13 September 2008 01:56 (nine years ago) Permalink

"Liked" is going a little bit far, but I can corroborate The Rev's story.

Eric H., Saturday, 13 September 2008 02:29 (nine years ago) Permalink

haha pasted from upthread

peace, love, and ban deeznuts (The Reverend), Saturday, 13 September 2008 02:32 (nine years ago) Permalink

five months pass...

Always be My Baby is the greatest song ever written.

Plaxico (I know, right?), Friday, 27 February 2009 00:54 (nine years ago) Permalink

I met Mariah back stage one day and fucked her in her ass. She absolutely loved it and asked me to do it to her again after the show. She really does have a small, skinny ass and I wish she would clean it more often.

― peace, love, and ban deeznuts (The Reverend), Saturday, September 13, 2008 1:55 AM (5 months ag

lolololz

pussy spread like the rainbow (The Brainwasher), Friday, 27 February 2009 00:56 (nine years ago) Permalink

yeah rev otm

the powerful claw (J0rdan S.), Friday, 27 February 2009 00:59 (nine years ago) Permalink

three months pass...

i'm sorry but i have to say that i am saddened by that, rev.

the whole Butterfly album is worthwhile, very much so.

surm, Tuesday, 23 June 2009 23:30 (nine years ago) Permalink

one year passes...

http://twitter.com/MariahCarey/status/19813217327

never change, mimi <3 <3 <3

لوووووووووووووووووووول (lex pretend), Thursday, 29 July 2010 09:34 (eight years ago) Permalink

Dear lord. I had to listen to that butchering of "Without You" the other day (that was her, wasn't it?). I shall pretend the question was not asked.
― Ned Raggett, Wednesday, May 2, 2001 1:00 AM (9 years ago) Bookmark Suggest Ban Permalink

this is a really unfortunate statement

janice (surm), Friday, 30 July 2010 17:55 (eight years ago) Permalink

Destroy: "Dream Lover". Oh, look. Everything detestable about Mariah in one handy package. How convenient.

― Dan Perry, Wednesday, May 2, 2001 1:00 AM (9 years ago) Bookmark Suggest Ban Permalink

this is also very troubling. one of the great classics.

janice (surm), Friday, 30 July 2010 17:56 (eight years ago) Permalink

i should stop now before i get too down on life.

janice (surm), Friday, 30 July 2010 17:56 (eight years ago) Permalink

the whole Butterfly album is worthwhile, very much so.

it's the only thing i really like by her but this. "the roof" (song & video) is just the most gorgeous thing eva.

prolego, Friday, 30 July 2010 18:03 (eight years ago) Permalink

OMG RIGHT

janice (surm), Friday, 30 July 2010 18:04 (eight years ago) Permalink

the roof... i can't even. one night i heard it drifting out of my bedroom when i didn't really know the album well and i was like WAHT IS THIS THING. her voice!!

janice (surm), Friday, 30 July 2010 18:05 (eight years ago) Permalink

:( @ top of this thread, :) @ bottom

peacocks, Friday, 30 July 2010 18:15 (eight years ago) Permalink

i think the most perfect way to hear "the roof" would be drifting across summer night air from another room or flat

لوووووووووووووووووووول (lex pretend), Friday, 30 July 2010 18:16 (eight years ago) Permalink

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4rV1qmXwmy8&feature=player_embedded

watch it now

janice (surm), Sunday, 1 August 2010 15:15 (eight years ago) Permalink

one year passes...

I met Mariah back stage one day and fucked her in her ass. She absolutely loved it and asked me to do it to her again after the show. She really does have a small, skinny ass and I wish she would clean it more often.

― dave swade, Tuesday, September 4, 2001 7:00 PM (10 years ago)

ilxor, Sunday, 22 April 2012 03:26 (six years ago) Permalink

eleven months pass...

http://static.wetpaint.me/network/ROOT/photos/Mariah-1650598034875288361.jpg

fuck yeah mariah carey

flamenco drop (lex pretend), Wednesday, 3 April 2013 09:05 (five years ago) Permalink

The Roof is such a jam.

MikoMcha, Wednesday, 3 April 2013 10:21 (five years ago) Permalink

The beat is totally Shook Ones...

MikoMcha, Wednesday, 3 April 2013 10:29 (five years ago) Permalink

Surprised I've never heard this before.

MikoMcha, Wednesday, 3 April 2013 10:31 (five years ago) Permalink

one month passes...

i don't like this woman's music at all, but every time i hear the high notes at the end of Emotions i laugh very hard.

charlie h, Wednesday, 29 May 2013 16:45 (five years ago) Permalink

i just noticed dave swade's post upthread. A+

charlie h, Wednesday, 29 May 2013 16:49 (five years ago) Permalink

one month passes...

can ppl post their fav mariah remixes? remixes of mariah songs. there was that awesome house one from last year but i can't remember what it was called... i'm trying to wade through youtubes of others and found this cool junior vasquez one but there's a lot can i get some help

flopson, Thursday, 25 July 2013 22:13 (five years ago) Permalink

one year passes...

New single: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=da1xoQFE7ts

RAP GAME SHANI DAVIS (Raymond Cummings), Saturday, 2 May 2015 21:57 (three years ago) Permalink

jeez her voice sounds so strained in the chorus, dunno if i can get down with this one mariah gurl

difficult-difficult lemon-difficult (VegemiteGrrl), Saturday, 2 May 2015 22:30 (three years ago) Permalink

It makes me laugh when she sings the word "infinity" for an infinite amount of time. And that's a ... good thing, I think?

Norse Jung (Eric H.), Monday, 4 May 2015 17:55 (three years ago) Permalink

i love the voice on the actual "infinity" trills, that head voice is fucking beyond

some of the other vocal production is admittedly kinda off tho

still think the song is kinda beautiful

surm, Monday, 4 May 2015 17:58 (three years ago) Permalink

Last "dream" is hysterical.

Norse Jung (Eric H.), Monday, 4 May 2015 17:59 (three years ago) Permalink

The scoop up. I'm in stitches here.

Norse Jung (Eric H.), Monday, 4 May 2015 18:00 (three years ago) Permalink

omg it is

i know, i actually really love this song even tho some of the vocals are like waht

i repeat tho that the trills are like no other

surm, Monday, 4 May 2015 18:00 (three years ago) Permalink

seven months pass...

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=w3KOowB4k_k

To anyone that wants to put Mariah Carey down: I will come to your house, and I will fucking kill you. Don't fuck with Mariah Carey, unless you wanna fuck with me (you don't)

LEGALIZE COCAINE (monster mash), Sunday, 6 December 2015 18:02 (two years ago) Permalink

Gay or straight (I believe it's all on a spectrum), agree with me here, that she was the most beautiful woman in the world in this video. Or, I will castrate you because you're useless anyway.

LEGALIZE COCAINE (monster mash), Sunday, 6 December 2015 18:04 (two years ago) Permalink

Everything she did down to 'Rainbow' is unfuckwithable. Don't fuck with me today. Today is a Mariah Carey day.

LEGALIZE COCAINE (monster mash), Sunday, 6 December 2015 18:05 (two years ago) Permalink

LEAVE MARIAH CAREY AND ME ALONE,

LEGALIZE COCAINE (monster mash), Sunday, 6 December 2015 19:12 (two years ago) Permalink

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yXQViqx6GMY

I love her so much. All of you guys are assholes for not loving her. I love her so much.

LEGALIZE COCAINE (monster mash), Sunday, 6 December 2015 19:27 (two years ago) Permalink

I can seriously talk about how much I lLOVE MARIAH CAREY all day, but, I'll not do that. I just wish Surmounter were here.

LEGALIZE COCAINE (monster mash), Sunday, 6 December 2015 20:12 (two years ago) Permalink

I want to be the ANTI-ALEX IN NYC, because Mariah Carey is wonderful, and I will fucking YELL at people who disagree.

LEGALIZE COCAINE (monster mash), Sunday, 6 December 2015 21:51 (two years ago) Permalink

Don't worry. I'm here for you. I'm here for Mariah.

The Reverend, Sunday, 6 December 2015 22:20 (two years ago) Permalink

damn dawg we all love Mariah in here, and I voted for "Ribbon" in that Pazz & Jop poll

bunny slopes, Monday, 7 December 2015 03:58 (two years ago) Permalink

She is, was and ever shall be ... fucking dreadful.

Alex in NYC, Monday, 14 December 2015 14:27 (two years ago) Permalink

i'm here monster. nice think piece in the Times the other day.

surm, Monday, 28 December 2015 00:26 (two years ago) Permalink

two years pass...

Destroy Hero imo.

morning wood truancy (Alfred, Lord Sotosyn), Monday, 5 February 2018 02:50 (six months ago) Permalink


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