childhood trauma flashbacks

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has this ever happened to you

how do you make them go away

it sucks

BIG HOOS aka the steendriver, Friday, 4 September 2015 15:25 (two years ago) Permalink

do you mean recovered memories or just vivid recollections of grim shit that went down? I mainly only have the latter, there've been one or two things that bubbled up where I was like "oh, whoa, where've you been hiding, I can see why"

as you might imagine, I've gotten a lot of therapy, it's huge for me. in part because these sorts of memories, incorporating them is the key - like, they're not me, they're something that happened to me and are a part of me...idk man it's very very complicated terrain, I wouldn't even begin to address it without my therapist holding my hand. you can get to a point where you're largely at peace with them, anyway, where you see them in the broader context of the person you became. which in your case is a fucking rad person who sees the good in others and gives of himself freely and openly, inspiring others along the way. the person who was traumatized grew into that person. for me, that can be a huge comfort.

tremendous crime wave and killing wave (Joan Crawford Loves Chachi), Friday, 4 September 2015 18:23 (two years ago) Permalink

"you can get to a point where you're largely at peace with them, anyway, where you see them in the broader context of the person you became."

ime this, some mix of distance & hopefully a chance to experience that w/e it was isnt going to own or define you or what you can control in yourself in the longer term, and idk just piling on better memories.

avoidance isnt necessarily a great evil of it buys you space as needed, obv yr question doesn't suggest that's an option, but
tbh there's just swathes of childhood that I don't remember nor try to, reflexively I'll shy away from

deejerk reactions (darraghmac), Friday, 4 September 2015 18:32 (two years ago) Permalink

joan crawford otm

mattresslessness, Friday, 4 September 2015 19:21 (two years ago) Permalink

do you mean recovered memories or just vivid recollections of grim shit that went down?

sudden attacks of memory so vivid i lose track of where i am--in the past, all my memories were in the third person. now, for the first time, i'm remembering from my own point of view.

BIG HOOS aka the steendriver, Friday, 4 September 2015 19:27 (two years ago) Permalink

I've done a lot of therapy, and 5-6 years ago I had what I thought was a breakthrough and I thought I was done dealing with this--until this week, when a comment someone made to me forced a lot to the surface.

BIG HOOS aka the steendriver, Friday, 4 September 2015 19:31 (two years ago) Permalink

sudden attacks of memory so vivid i lose track of where i am--in the past, all my memories were in the third person. now, for the first time, i'm remembering from my own point of view.

man I have been there. if you can grok it, get that this is possibly a sign you are ready for new terrain, for a huger sense of yourself.

is this board indexed? if not, can we move this?

I'm not on the "God only gives you what you can handle train" most days but sometimes with memory I feel like your heart knows what you can take, and knows that you'll be happier and healthier if you go through the hard stuff and emerge higher, so when it won't crack you, some stuff comes through. that was true for me when my abuser died. I could stop pretending it hadn't been so bad. it changed my life, but it was hairy going for a year or so -- lots of sudden crying fits, very intense times.

tremendous crime wave and killing wave (Joan Crawford Loves Chachi), Friday, 4 September 2015 22:01 (two years ago) Permalink

if "yes" can we move this obv lol.

tremendous crime wave and killing wave (Joan Crawford Loves Chachi), Friday, 4 September 2015 22:01 (two years ago) Permalink


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