YOUR OTHER GLORPING FANTASY LEAGUES!!!

i CAN get to a 2009 espn league because i'm still in it

it's a doozy

https://s10.postimg.io/roetqdosp/draffft.png

i really hate playoff season

especially when you're opposed by a team with brian dozier

and you have tony watson on one of your teams

and cole hamels decides to fuck me yesterday

8 homers today for one of my opponents

this is in a league where i finished the regular season as the leader in 6 categories and second in 2 more

i'm currently in first place in mine, probably gonna set the regular season record after 5 years of play, and the team that is gonna sneak into fourth did so on dozier and freeman's backs (he was in last place out of 10 before the ASB) which is... concerning

i like the dude and i was cheering for him to pull this epic comeback but now i am looking at the current 2-4 teams and going SHIT THEY ARE ALL FLAMING OUT but this dude is RESURGENT

i sound like a psychopath but i really knew i shouldve added josh collmenter for his start today

right there with you, desperately clinging onto Ks in a streaming arms race and trying to scrape them together without killing my WHIP

tomorrow is the last day of a 2-week first round and it's just a total streaming shitshow, it's enough that i've finally brought up my displeasure with unlimited pitching and how this happens every single year in the playoffs where it isn't about making smart choices it's just about going nuts streaming horrible september pitchers. i'm set to have 40+ starts when this round is all said and done

awkward because this league is family, the guy in charge of the rules is my cousin's husband, the guy i'm having an arms race with right now is his dad who i've never met, and his dad's on my side. i think everyone in the league is probably on my side, the problem is my cousin's husband loves streaming.

meanwhile this team is the best i've ever had in this league, i won 6 categories in the regular season with 2nd place finishes in 2 others (dominated in everything but HR and RBI)

and my entire team has decided to stop doing all of these things right as the playoffs began

struggling like crazy to get 5 wins because a tie wins it for me, i have ERA down but it's a race for Ks, WHIP is shaky, AVG is extremely shaky (he was briefly beating me yesterday), and i've literally restructured my entire offense minus 3 spots (both corner infield and C) to produce stolen bases, and NO ONE is stealing bases right now. hamilton went down and i had to drop him for streaming SPs, and it's been so very tough without him. i'm starting terrence gore! every day! he hasn't even stolen a base since i picked him up! i picked up stanton off the scrap heap when he started to chirp about coming back early, then he came back WAY early and ended up being a huge albatross on my bench. he's still an albatross because he doesn't contribute in AVG and SBs, the only cats i have any hope in. it sucks.

had to punt saves after winning it in the regular season because the goddamn trade deadline cut them in half. i'm usually very good about winning saves in the playoffs via streaming for vultures, but i had to give that up for the Ks arms race.

i'm just gonna go crazy about these stolen bases. i'm on vacation right now and this fucking league is gonna ruin my last day tomorrow. if these assholes don't start stealing some goddamn bags i swear

meanwhile he just got 4 Ks from kimbrel and i want to die

i think i'm gonna regret starting brock stewart at ARI

hopefully not as much as he's gonna regret starting shelby miller in ARI

had an amazing day in the end, anchored by jon gray

but only 2 SBs, keeping us in a tie, and him up 5-4-1

i thought maybe i could pull a quick one and drop my streamers tomorrow to fill in every single batter with someone who is at least capable of stealing a base (machado apparently, MCab and gary sanchez are not) but he has 5 starters tomorrow and the lead gray gave me still isn't enough to potentially cede Ks

in the semifinals of my h2h point league right now. i just set the league record for best regular season ever, 19-5. third season out of five where i've finished the season in 1st place. and now once again i am getting shitkicked in the semis. granted the week is only half over but the score's 135-106, my opponent who limped into the POs decided ot go high-risk and start basically every available NY Met due to the pitching matchups, and now lol EVAN FUCKING GATTIS has hit like 400 home runs in 3 days.

my team this week: molina, votto, kipnis, seager, villar, bryant, trout, hanley, abreu (+ LAD pitching staff, we do team pitching)
his team this week: gattis, goldschmidt, drury, healy, asdrubal, granderson, myers, springer, ortiz (+... you guessed it NYM staff)

the worst part is, i almost didn't have to face him at all in the semis, it came down to the last day and he could have easily finished 3rd (only face in finals) or 5th (not in POs) but of course not. fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck

ADD TO THIS THE FACT THAT I AM LOSING GROUND IN THE ILX LEAGUE AND I AM VERY CROSS INDEED

i didn't know team pitching was a thing

at least you have kershaw, he's capable of much disruption

mlb.com does team pitching, we transitioned to fantrax but recreated the team pitchin. it honestly makes so much sense for our league where the two-start-pitcher thing would almost certainly cause a huge points gap between the check-every-hour folks and the check-every-week folks. plus idk it makes sense! it's a v cool system actually & you don't get completely fucked if you lose a pitcher (which you always do)

but yeah... kershaw put up 20 points (MASSIVE) on monday, and i'm still losing by 30. that's how fucking fucked i am. i guess he gets another go this week but honestly i need my BATTERS to do something ffs.

ugh – i hated team pitching, but i guess it makes sense in a H2H (which i'm also not crazy about).

i'm in a crazy tight 1-2-3 battle in my other league. started yesterday in 2nd place, 4 points behind our long time league leader. my team hit 5 home run (thanks Gattis/Sanchez!) – dropped to 3rd.

is there a way i can blame my team going from first place by 20 points to tied for first place within a month on the yahoo hacking scandal

man I wish I wasn't stuck streaming starters and vulture saves so I could actually bench francisco lindor's underperforming ass for a day

I've considered just dropping him for drubes but there's no discernible reason for him to be sucking so hard right now.

the six non-playoff teams aren't allowed to make moves so there's always a freakish amount of hot hitters (like drubezzzz) who never get picked up while I keep a spot on my roster for sean fucking manaea

this sounds like the worst league set-up ever.

now i have to determine if i should punt saves and drop britton colome and the newly minted i guess neris... maybe neris is enough to compete in it but i'm already behind by 2

everyone says uehara is the backup guy in boston so who gets the vulture save today? ziegler. i could've gotten drubez with that spot. or roman quinn and his bag.

also lol the rangers are about to clinch so i guess it's time to pick up RAUL FUCKING ALCANTARA to face their b-team tomorrow, worked with chase anderson vs the cubs

my new meta is planning this shit out way in advance. eno sarris said he loved it but he's sort of gone off the deep end lately.

and indeed the rangers are throwing out the worst lineup in history today

watch out for glasnow vs the nats and anderson vs the dodgers, though anderson might have better luck with their real lineup of mostly lefties

both teams have an E# of 2

so apparently elvis andrus isn't feeling hungover

so apparently my opponent's team felt like scoring 18 RBI today

yup i just lost last night in the semis after setting the regular season record for the second year in a row

playoffs are bullshit and people who use them should feel bad

just added every single FA pitcher to start tomorrow, will do the same for sunday's games

i hope this pisses someone off at least

i also hope it works

IT'S NOT WORKING

https://s21.postimg.org/8szgto55z/pitch.png

one. hecking. masterpiece.

i did this mainly to catch my opponent in wins

he had 4 starts and also got 2

AND WE'RE OFF

https://s10.postimg.org/wnmi6782h/pitching2.png

for a brief moment, this squadron of goofuses actually wrested WHIP from my opponent

this was right before clay richard decided to try his hand at pitching baseball

my cousin just cheated with commissioner powers

second time he's done this

anyone with ESPN experience know if there's a log somewhere where you can see commissioner forced changes? he moved dickerson from his bench to an active spot like a full hour after he hit a 3-run homer.

i'm not going to call him out on it because lol family but i'd like to have concrete evidence anyway

https://s10.postimg.org/lan2w1h2h/chrischeating.png

there it is

he's done it 13 times this year

Uh, family or not that is fucking laaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaame

But wait, second time he's done this, or 13th?

second time i've caught him doing it. first time was years ago when matt kemp mysteriously migrated from the bench after hitting a bomb. i called him out on it on fb, he told me he had no clue what i was talking about, i gave him the benefit of the doubt and convinced myself i looked at his roster too early the first time.

13th time he's done it this season according to the TranLog. i didn't know until just now that it specified via the "(By LM)" thing so i just did a ctrl-f. he did it 10 times last year, and that seems to be as far back as the logs go. maybe a few of those were more or less kosher but i know for a fact that the one he just did wasn't.

i should point out that he's won the entire league 3 out of the last 5 years

last LM transaction before this was exactly 2 weeks ago in the semifinals, right after they got close

Lame. Time to find a new league.

i won -- second year in a row i beat him for it. his cheating resulted in him tying me in RBI but i still won 7-2. at one point i was winning 9-1 with all starting pitching categories. had 10 starts yesterday and 10 starts today, mostly garbage scrap guys, and they combined for a 3.16 ERA and a 1.28 WHIP along with 8 wins and 99 Ks. that's freakishly good isn't it? would've been even better if i'd only picked jose berrios.

not sure what to do now without making thanksgiving really awkward. and my damn dad's in the league now. and HIS dad! that's the weirdest part.

ask him if you can have the password to change your lineup after games have already started

If he gives it to you, use it to completely annihilate him

At dinner, mention that you are master of both fantasy and reality

also, you can tell him about the vastly superior keeper league – with its amazing, handsome commissioner – you're thinking of joining.

Thanksgiving is gonna be amazing this year!

serious suggestions:
* ask if you can have a turn being the administrator
* say you're too busy to do it this season and then sign up in a different league

I quit fbb