Misdirected emails

Jordan,

Thank you for signing your liability waiver, we will review it for correctness when you arrive. For your records, here is a copy of the waiver you agreed to. To save time during the check in process, you can bring a printed copy with you.

House Of Boom
Extreme Air Sports
100 Urton Ln
Louisville, KY 40223

Merry Christmas Amanda! Enjoy this wonderful gift of National Geographic Magazine. Now you have more material for lighters;) Love, Ryan

Sender: Robert Y...
To: Clay S...

Subject: [no subject]

Go.

Microuf new 10 computer

One of the boys gave me this one and I’m having a hard time learning how to operate it , as I understand many other people have . I’d like to have the old one back .

HAVE A MERRY CHRISTMAS !!!!

Ticket Purchase Details
Confirmation Number: 0720038823
Movie Title: Star Wars: The Force Awakens
Movie Date: 12/26/2015
Movie Time: 3:30 PM
Ticket Quantity: 2
Ticket Type: 2 Adult
Theatre Name: AMC Livonia 20
Theatre Address: 19500 Haggerty Road
LIVONIA, MI 48152
Theatre Phone Number: (734) 542-3191
Ticket Amount: 2 Adult Tickets $17.58
Ticket Total: $17.58
Total Convenience Fee: $2.50

$17.58 inc tax and fees for two tickets? i'm moving to livonia mi

Reminder: Your ecard from Warren/Hilda is waiting for you at AmericanGreetings.com

- logistics planning for the muse concert in toronto jan 16
- a draft of a letter that a couple wrote with the help of their therapist to another couple

^now you're just teasing with that last one

i would feel bad posting it, but it's so vague it's not actually that interesting. i think from a husband and wife to the husband's brother and his wife.

"We're sorry we ordered the extra sour cream from Uncle Julio's. We had no idea Susan was intolerant of lactose."

Hey, DAMNIT!

Thanks for registering and becoming a PlayersPlus member.

..a woman in Oregon has spent the last few years believing my email address is hers. Stop it, damnit!

oh god I just remembered that a client of one of my former companies sent in a note to my firm, on the back of which was a letter to presumably her ex about their relationship.

juicy

Another one. No text but the subject:

Hi neighbors. Here we are at sea tac waiting for flight to la. All is good. Sunny & gorgeous here. Heard from my sister , looks like she won't be coming to basin tonight. Maybe later. Will you close my Gate at some point?  Love to you both!

I think the airport has an employee who closes the gate after a flight departs.

"You are old, Father William," the young man said,
"And your hair has become very white;
And yet you incessantly stand on your head--
Do you think, at your age, it is right?"

"In my youth," Father William replied to his son,
"I feared it might injure the brain;
But now that I'm perfectly sure I have none,
Why, I do it again and again."

"You are old," said the youth, "as I mentioned before,
And have grown most uncommonly fat;
Yet you turned a back-somersault in at the door--
Pray, what is the reason of that?"

"In my youth," said the sage, as he shook his gray locks,
"I kept all my limbs very supple
By the use of this ointment--one shilling the box--
Allow me to sell you a couple."

"You are old," said the youth, "and your jaws are too weak
For anything tougher than suet;
Yet you finished the goose, with the bones and the beak:
Pray, how did you manage to do it?"

"In my youth," said his father, "I took to the law,
And argued each case with my wife;
And the muscular strength which it gave to my jaw
Has lasted the rest of my life."

"You are old," said the youth; "one would hardly suppose
That your eye was as steady as ever;
Yet you balanced an eel on the end of your nose--
What made you so awfully clever?"

"I have answered three questions, and that is enough,"
Said his father, "don't give yourself airs!
Do you think I can listen all day to such stuff?
Be off, or I'll kick you down-stairs!"

-- Lewis Carroll

Hello Alumni!

I'd first like to wish you all a Happy New Year! I hope 2016 brings you all the happiness and prosperity you deserve.

We will be hosting an open house/support meeting that is specific to **** only clients and be ecstatic if you would be able to joint us:

Event details:

Address: Men Being Honest Group, *** ******** ***. This is misleading - so we meet AT THE ENTRANCE AROUND THE RIGHT SIDE OF THE BUILDING, on ********* St. under the bridge. We all go in together as it is a secure building, so please try to be on time. Look for a bunch of misfits milling about the side entrance. If you get confused, call Curtis at (***) ***-****

--there will be light snacks and beverages provided.

Fw: Watch Lecture One for "Winston Churchill and Statesmanship"

Dear mh:
I hope you will watch this series on “Winston Churchill” and possibly take a few minutes to make some notes and to begin writing your thoughts down. Because within your genes rest your great grandfather and your father who believe strongly in the Ten Commands as well as the Bill of Rights and the Constitution.
Love you
Dad

Sent from Windows Mail

Fw: 123_1.jpg

http://i.imgur.com/Kar0YkR.jpg

I just got a forwarded message from my non-dad about a second part of this Churchill series

I should watch it, I am really intrigued to see how Winston Churchill is related to the ten commandments, bill of rights, and constitution

Tre,

-- how many have criminal conviction
-- need their contact info to get info on the conviction (email and phone number)
**Students with FELONY or misdemeanor charges of Domestic Violence, Physical Assault, unlawful use of a firearm, etc., will not be accepted for training. No Exceptions.**
-- how many members
-- need their full name, DOB, contact information
--do you want just white card for team members or blue cards for those who qualify to carry a weapon?
-- Company is responsible for security guards required training.
--Will have to be trained by a Board-approved instructor
--Will you be covering the cost for me to take exam if I have to take it

Dear Lord, Don.

http://i.imgur.com/rP7a6LK.jpg

lol @ "Al, Al, Al, Bill, Bill, Bob, Bob, Bob, Bob, Bob, Bruce, Bruce, Christene, Chuck, Chuck, Dale, Dan, Dan, ..."

Al
Al
Al
Bill
Bill
Bob
Bob
Bob
Bob
Bob
Bruce
Bruce
Christene
Chuck
Chuck
Dale
Dan
Dan
Dennis
Denny
Don
Ed
Gary
Gary
Gene
Gene
Jack
Jaime
Jay
Jeff
Jeremy
Jerry
Jim
Jim
Jim
Jim
Jim
Joe
Joe
Joe
Joe
Joe
John
John
Kevin
Kevin
Len
Mark
Michael
Miguel
Mike
Mike
Nick
Nick
Pat
Pat
Pat
Pat
Patrick
Patrick
Pete
Pete
Roger
Ryan
Ryan
Sal
Steve
Steve
Steve
Steve
Thomas
Tim
Tim
Tim
Tim
Timothy
Tom
Tom
Tom
Tom
Tom
Tom
Tom
Ty
Val & Laura
Wally

poll

Lyrics

What? Creepy weirdos in a thread called "(redacted)" ? I'm shocked!

Ha! Wrong thread, but I'm sticking with this mistake.

I won't have you coming into this thread and besmirching the good names of Mike, Mike, Nick, Nick, Pat, Pat, Pat, Pat, Patrick, Patrick, Pete, Pete and Roger like that.

Just the Chucks, dude. Just the Chucks. *shivers*

some recent trend with ilxors impugning the names of my coworkers

zero jareds tho

my coworker is 1/4 lebanese and a ginger, that has to count for something

Just got a resume which included this:

http://i.imgur.com/23rZhXs.png

...they're talking about pets, right?

Nope.

The english is so garbled in that. And people wonder why they cant find work.

can't find work in the health care industry, at that.

WWR is offering limited spring turkey hunting this year as there are an abundant amount of birds due to excellent range conditions and it should be awesome hunting.

Season: May 19th thru May 1st

$1,295 - 2 night all inclusive guided hunt with luxury lodging, chef prepared meals, & 1 Tom (unguided $995)

2 person minimum

Dear Jesus

Thank you for your application for a Mechanical Maintenance Engineer role with our company.

Whilst being very impressed with your C.V. and qualifications, unfortunately we have no suitable vacancies available currently.

sorry Jesus. :(

also "whilst"

oh, I guess they're a UK company, so maybe "whilst" is less pretentious there.

Premium content for Club 77 members: http://ilxor.com/ILX/ThreadSelectedControllerServlet?showall=true&bookmarkedmessageid=5801577&boardid=77&threadid=90933

Hello,

You are receiving this email because you have one or more DVDs checked out from the WWCH DVD library, and this is your reminder that they are now due for return. I will be at the meeting this Saturday to accept returns.

Some people have experienced issues with playing a couple of the DVDs. If you have experienced any issues with the DVD you have checked out, please either reply to this message and let me know the title of the DVD or put a note with the DVD. If the DVD is boring, that does not count as a playback issue! :o) Seriously, though, I welcome all feedback. I will be adding to the library this year and the feedback is helpful guidance for future purchases.

Thank you and see you on Saturday!

Lisa

Here's the Receipt You Requested in Our Store

2497 South West 27th Avenue
Ocala, FL 34474
(352) 873-8767
SALE 1790040 1 001 67936
1679 02/16/16 12:54
QTY SKU PRICE


REWARDS NUMBER 2889594889
1 PHONE MESSAGE BK 2
087958411546 12.29
1 ENVELOPE SECURITY
718103031271 18.99
1 9X12 CLEAR CLASP E
718103146593 4.79
1 BIC WITE-OUT CORRE *
070330505926 3.00
1 BROTHER TN450 HY B
012502626770 73.99
SUBTOTAL 113.06
Standard Tax 6.00% 6.78
TOTAL $119.84
Visa 119.84

:(

Dear Jordan, I gave your Dad a Check for $100 last week to put in your Chase Account. I hope that helps you a little bit. Hope that your test results turned out good. Thank you for calling me , it was so good to hear from you.
Maybe we can look into getting you a computer later, maybe your mom could help get one. Love, Grandma Jean

Thank you for your enquiry!

Dear Mr mh,

You are one step away from selling your LAND ROVER FREELANDER TD4 HSE - TF07UGG

Your Appointment is confirmed at:

Dealer: Evans Halshaw Car Supermarket Plymouth - PL7 1YB
Time: 10:40
Date: 19/02/2016
Contact: The Sell Your Car Buyer

What to bring with you:

V5 Document
Photographic ID (either passport or driving licence)
Utility Bill - showing the address of vehicle registration (dated within the last 3 months)
Your UK bank details - (so that we can process your payment)
Valid MOT Certificate (if applicable)
Car Service History (if applicable)
Valid Finance Settlement Letter (showing final settlement figure if applicable)
All Keys including spares
Any accessories which are related to the use of the vehicle i.e. user manuals, locking wheel nuts, radio fascias etc.

Subject: Will you be Nathan�s Accountability Partner?
You are being invited to receive Covenant Eyes Internet Accountability Reports for Nathan. Nathan is installing the Covenant Eyes program on computers, phones, and tablets they use, which will monitor everywhere they go online.
As an Accountability Partner, you will get Accountability Reports that will show Internet activity for Nathan. You can then use these Reports to have informed discussions with Nathan about Internet use.
Accept or decline this invitation.
Learn more about what a good Accountability Partner is supposed to do, and how accountability can help a person to establish good online habits.
Sincerely,
The Covenant Eyes Team

And you accepted, yes?

http://i.imgur.com/9j5gHid.png

Please don't swipe right. Please don't swipe right. Please don't swipe right.