i feel like i am living in a text adventure

run y/n 

you run

>the door is locked

Pick up Log.

Use the Log to get in.

the lurker follows you

You are in a circular room. Rows of bookshelves line the walls. Several people huddle in a corner discussing Pynchon.

> start thread "the beatles are overrated"

[code]there is a geir

what do you want to do?[/code

The people in the corner look at you oddly. "What does that have to do with postmodern fiction?" they ask?

use "book of eggers"

The people in the corner drop the Pynchon book and stare at you.

>defend oneself with irony

The people batter themselves senseless against your irony!

The Pynchon book lies unnoticed.

>take pynchon book

you now have the pynchon book.

>there is a grate on the floor. you can make out the words 'I Love Comics' on the grate.

> open grate

there is a strange smell from below the grate.

You hear the distant sounds of lasers and a male voice shouting "LUDA!"

through the grate you see a dark room with several odd-looking creatures along the edges. they are wearing capes and appear to be playing with toy ships.

>close grate

You are stopped by MONA LISA LUDATITS!

>use search

that will not help you here. try something else.

>attack MONA LISA LUDATITS with Linkbreaker Sword

you broke the link.

>look

there is a door to the west marked AFTL. The floor grate is now closed. The readers appear to be regaining consciousness.

>read pynchon book

[cast spell of confusion on SELF] You take 4 points of damage.

>use FAQ

I don't understand.

Still dazed, you wander through the door marked AFTL.

The room is very quiet.

enjoying this

From behind the wall you hear a Chung.

ignore the Chung

there is a bargain priced DVD here

>ask Chung about hentai

There is a whooshing sound and a bright light. You feel like you are spinning, and close your eyes. When you open them, you are back in the room lined with bookshelves.

There is a door to the west marked AFTL. There is a closed grate in the floor. There are some readers here.

>turn face into a heart
you can't do that.

>INVENTORY
YOU HAVE:
A PERSONALITY DISORDER
A CHIP ON YOUR SHOULDER

>share personality disorder with readers

you are already doing that.

u guys are dorks

> Computer, I think I'm in love with you

I don't understand.

> I knew you wouldn't...this is so SO hard. I guess it started at your birthday party last year.

I don't understand.

> Yeah, you didn't even know I was there. Rodney invited me - we were seeing each other back then, off and on.

I don't understand.

> He was cheating on his girl with me. Ugh, let's not even go there. Anyways, you were handing out drinks by the hot tub and I couldn't take my eyes off of you.

I don't understand.

> Go West

You see a framed racist right-wing cartoon hanging up on a wall.

lol

>suggest ban the slocki

12 hours pass

xyzzy

you have unlocked '77'

you enter the door marked '77'
there is a doorman
do you want to tip the doorman y/n
y
are you sure you want to do this y/n
y
there is a CLUSTERFUCK

>invite the finn

the finn has PRINCIPLES
he refuses your offer
he wants to share his PRINCIPLES with you

(this thread is no fun without tuomas, tbh)