your terrible ideas

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1. An adaptation of Blood Meridian scored by Def Leppard

real men love cheeses (latebloomer), Saturday, 4 July 2009 06:07 (eleven years ago) link

2. I'll move to San Francisco
3. Make a monster costume out of a dirty shag rug
4. Mobile DJ at English pub in a town an hour away using a PA I've never used

bamcquern, Saturday, 4 July 2009 06:25 (eleven years ago) link

5. date down

carpathian florist (roxymuzak), Saturday, 4 July 2009 08:08 (eleven years ago) link

6. date

what a delightfully quirky new voice! (bug), Saturday, 4 July 2009 08:10 (eleven years ago) link

1. An adaptation of Blood Meridian scored by Def Leppard

7. An adaption of The Mikado done entirely using mobile ringtones.

snoball, Saturday, 4 July 2009 08:30 (eleven years ago) link

8. a book about combat rock compared/contrasted with the 1982 worlds fair

carpathian florist (roxymuzak), Saturday, 4 July 2009 08:38 (eleven years ago) link

9. (another music one, but that's what I save most of my truly bad ideas for) An album made entirely using samples from Lou Reed's "Metal Machine Music" and Presley's "Having Fun With Elvis On Stage" (because they are supposedly the worst two albums ever made - my theory being that I could make an even worse-er album by combining them).

snoball, Saturday, 4 July 2009 08:44 (eleven years ago) link

10. putting chilli sauce on vanilla ice cream - one mouthful was enough to cause projectile vomiting.

snoball, Saturday, 4 July 2009 08:46 (eleven years ago) link

11. marinara sauce and peanut butter

what a delightfully quirky new voice! (bug), Saturday, 4 July 2009 08:56 (eleven years ago) link

12. Going back to school.

Turkoglu & Love Affair (Clay), Saturday, 4 July 2009 09:03 (eleven years ago) link

nah, that's a great idea.

what a delightfully quirky new voice! (bug), Saturday, 4 July 2009 09:55 (eleven years ago) link

13. Starting the thread "What does 'rockist' mean?"

bamcquern, Saturday, 4 July 2009 16:05 (eleven years ago) link

14. A pop group exclusively made up of 2 year olds called Diaper Rash.

real men love cheeses (latebloomer), Saturday, 4 July 2009 16:09 (eleven years ago) link

13. Starting the thread "What does 'rockist' mean?"

― bamcquern, Saturday, July 4, 2009 11:05 AM (1 hour ago) Bookmark

if your original post was a gigantic picture of goatse with an embedded sound clip of, i dunno, somebody having explosive diarrhea or something, then it'd be a pretty great idea

what a delightfully quirky new voice! (bug), Saturday, 4 July 2009 17:28 (eleven years ago) link

15. deciding you wanna ride a goddamn ferris wheel

16. 1p3

a poppy seed NAGL (J0rdan S.), Saturday, 4 July 2009 17:46 (eleven years ago) link

rong

two months pass...

17. Sell white rice dyed brown to exploit gullible newcomers to the health food world (long time health food consumers would probably see right through the scam.) The brand would be called "Rice that is Brown" rather than "So-and-So brown rice" and list the ingredients in super timy print.

latebloomer, Friday, 11 September 2009 02:29 (eleven years ago) link

eh..tiny print

latebloomer, Friday, 11 September 2009 02:30 (eleven years ago) link

haha the next step would be "Rice that is Multiethnic" and it would just be bag of Fruity Pebbles.

we like cars, we like cartoons (dyao), Friday, 11 September 2009 02:37 (eleven years ago) link

would that actually like... save you any money?

mountain G.O.A.T. (s1ocki), Friday, 11 September 2009 03:32 (eleven years ago) link

slocki you don't get it--IT'S A TERRIBLE IDEA!

ian, Friday, 11 September 2009 06:36 (eleven years ago) link

1. An adaptation of Blood Meridian scored by Def Leppard

7. An adaption of The Mikado done entirely using mobile ringtones.

18. an adaptation of Do You Remember Love?/Macross for the musical theater/broadway stage.

tehresa, Friday, 11 September 2009 07:08 (eleven years ago) link

maybe less terrible and more so not gonna happen why bc i am lazy

tehresa, Friday, 11 September 2009 07:08 (eleven years ago) link

im dying over rice that is brown

Angus Young (roxymuzak), Monday, 14 September 2009 12:04 (eleven years ago) link

19. Putting a book of my poetry out
20. Taking up a drug habit on the back of the highly unlikely profits from this anthology of work (any suggestions for the drugs?)

Don't Be A Ned Raggett (King Boy Pato), Monday, 14 September 2009 12:09 (eleven years ago) link

idk I've actually been pretty impressed with yr writing. Honestly.

\(^o\) (/o^)/ (ENBB), Monday, 14 September 2009 16:59 (eleven years ago) link

21. Combination mezzuzah and bottle opener, so you're never at a loss with a cold beer in your hand.

that stupid-ass cannibal pen-pal of yours (Laurel), Monday, 14 September 2009 17:03 (eleven years ago) link

(xxpost) not my terrible idea, but someone once suggested to me, in all seriousness, that I become a smack head in order to guarantee that I could continue to claim benefits.

a gift from your mind in the form of the perfect beat (snoball), Monday, 14 September 2009 17:04 (eleven years ago) link

patoetry plzzz

jergins, Monday, 14 September 2009 17:06 (eleven years ago) link

art project involving tramp stamps, semen and polaroid camera.

ian, Monday, 14 September 2009 17:31 (eleven years ago) link

A Terrible Plan!

velko, Monday, 14 September 2009 17:35 (eleven years ago) link

tramp stamps on actual tramps

fountain bleaut (s1ocki), Tuesday, 15 September 2009 04:15 (eleven years ago) link

like, hoboes

fountain bleaut (s1ocki), Tuesday, 15 September 2009 04:15 (eleven years ago) link

i thought it would be great an edgy brooklyn gallery! you know, like, transgressive sexuality & the mainstream appeal of defacing the body. or something.

ian, Tuesday, 15 September 2009 04:19 (eleven years ago) link

you have to go for that obsessive all-over-composition style in the installation ... also you need typewritten descriptions of the context for each photo

Suggest Bander-Meinhof Complex (sarahel), Tuesday, 15 September 2009 04:22 (eleven years ago) link

make the stamp say something edgy like "FEMINISM" or "ART" or something

we like cars, we like cartoons (dyao), Tuesday, 15 September 2009 04:23 (eleven years ago) link

the images will be titled with the content of the stamp.

for example:
daisies no. 2
chinese character nos. 1-3

ian, Tuesday, 15 September 2009 04:29 (eleven years ago) link

maybe you can install them onto a traced map of your city, with push pins, and place them in the locations where the people live or were photographed, and it could be a commentary on gentrification or routes travelled.

Suggest Bander-Meinhof Complex (sarahel), Tuesday, 15 September 2009 04:33 (eleven years ago) link

I'm trying to combine all the edgy art trends I can think of ...

Suggest Bander-Meinhof Complex (sarahel), Tuesday, 15 September 2009 04:34 (eleven years ago) link

^feelin this

ROCK BAND: BORBETOMAGUS (haitch), Tuesday, 15 September 2009 04:37 (eleven years ago) link

http://regretfulmorning.com/wp-content/uploads/2008/12/dunk-hunt-tramp-stamp.jpg

ian, Tuesday, 15 September 2009 04:40 (eleven years ago) link

http://purefnevyl.files.wordpress.com/2007/11/corinthians_tramp_stamp.jpg

ian, Tuesday, 15 September 2009 04:41 (eleven years ago) link

http://www.thesicness.com/pics/march09/03072009/tramp_stamp.jpg

ian, Tuesday, 15 September 2009 04:42 (eleven years ago) link

I think a pretty funny tramp stamp would be a second asshole

we like cars, we like cartoons (dyao), Tuesday, 15 September 2009 04:43 (eleven years ago) link

http://rlv.zcache.com/tramp_stamp_inspector_mug-p168228570079141682qzje_400.jpg

ian, Tuesday, 15 September 2009 04:44 (eleven years ago) link

idk I've actually been pretty impressed with yr writing. Honestly.

u drunk

a light salad of Adorno, Heidegger, Derrida and Esteban Buttez (King Boy Pato), Tuesday, 15 September 2009 13:53 (eleven years ago) link

Nope and I still stand by that statement.

\(^o\) (/o^)/ (ENBB), Tuesday, 15 September 2009 14:05 (eleven years ago) link

"dunk hunt"

Angus Young (roxymuzak), Tuesday, 15 September 2009 17:34 (eleven years ago) link

one month passes...

20-something. momus hosts a cooking show called "cumin in a girl's mouth"

chemical ali v. chemical frazier (m bison), Friday, 16 October 2009 19:56 (eleven years ago) link

A parody cover version of Marc Cohn's 'Walking In Memphis' called 'Corporate Memphis' about the currently popular corporate website style.

Being cheap is expensive (snoball), Wednesday, 7 April 2021 16:37 (one month ago) link

that could potentially get at least a few youtube clicks/shares/tweets/blorps

sgt. pepper's one-and-only bobo honkin' band (Doctor Casino), Wednesday, 7 April 2021 16:41 (one month ago) link

Well it was Corporate Memphis
Flat faceless dudes making business deals
It was just Corporate Memphis
I have at last forgotten how to feel

You Can't Have the Woogie Without a Little Boogie (Old Lunch), Wednesday, 7 April 2021 16:42 (one month ago) link

Breakin' Bad is a pretty good terrible idea, but it sounds mainly like a launch pad for the inevitable (and necessary) sequel, Breakin' Bad II: Narcotic Boogaloo.

― Condé Nasty (Ye Mad Puffin), Wednesday, 7 April 2021 14:46 (two hours ago) link

"I am the one who locks"

longtime caller, first time listener (man alive), Wednesday, 7 April 2021 16:51 (one month ago) link

lol

You Can't Have the Woogie Without a Little Boogie (Old Lunch), Wednesday, 7 April 2021 16:52 (one month ago) link

hoo boy

microsloth fig stimulator (Sufjan Grafton), Wednesday, 7 April 2021 17:06 (one month ago) link

SAY MY NAME
"boogaloo shrimp"
YOU'RE GODDAM RIGHT

G.A.G.S. (Gophers Against Getting Stuffed) (forksclovetofu), Wednesday, 7 April 2021 17:43 (one month ago) link

a dating app for cinephiles. no names ages or genders displayed (in the free version), just your top 10 movies.

― stylish but illegal (Simon H.), Tuesday, January 26, 2021 10:18 PM (two months ago) bookmarkflaglink

What hath ILX wrought?

Vinylly

https://www.phoenixnewtimes.com/music/dating-app-vinylly-matches-people-according-to-their-taste-in-music-11515428

Infanta Terrible (j.lu), Wednesday, 7 April 2021 17:43 (one month ago) link

I want there to be a thing where over the next six months ton of super cheesy airbrushed pixelated bad typography images of DMX and Prince Philip together in heaven start to show up seemingly out of nowhere.

Images of them with halos and a fuzzy glow, drawn in the style of the "jesus, with you always" images, going fishing together or just hanging out and laughing like they both knew it was their destiny to be together forever in the afterlife and that a whole lot of people around the world believed this strongly enough that they made their own images to celebrate it finally happening.

Then six months later to craft some sort of insane conspiracy about this and get the q folks riled up and focusing on it.

joygoat, Friday, 9 April 2021 17:45 (one month ago) link

Advert for Heinz Mayonnaise now with 50% extra free:
Just a guy squeezing a trail of mayonnaise out the bottle along the pavement as he walks home from the shop saying "I've actually got too much"

Party With A Jagger Ban (dog latin), Monday, 12 April 2021 00:51 (four weeks ago) link

Ha ha ha"heinz mayonaise: it's up to you what you do with the other half" and it's just a stocky bloke giving it a lengthy squeeze into a river.

Party With A Jagger Ban (dog latin), Monday, 12 April 2021 00:52 (four weeks ago) link

Okay no idea that made me laugh that hard can be that terrible.

You Can't Have the Woogie Without a Little Boogie (Old Lunch), Monday, 12 April 2021 03:30 (four weeks ago) link

Heinz makes mayonnaise?

Canon in Deez (silby), Monday, 12 April 2021 04:18 (four weeks ago) link

in this imaginary world where one can have too much mayonnaise

microsloth fig stimulator (Sufjan Grafton), Monday, 12 April 2021 04:36 (four weeks ago) link

I have some in my fridge

Party With A Jagger Ban (dog latin), Monday, 12 April 2021 08:45 (four weeks ago) link

i don't think i've ever bought a jar of mayonnaise.

koogs, Monday, 12 April 2021 10:19 (four weeks ago) link

Squeezy bottles = the future of mayo

Party With A Jagger Ban (dog latin), Monday, 12 April 2021 11:17 (four weeks ago) link

The present, even.

"The Pus/Worm" by The Smiths (hardcore dilettante), Monday, 12 April 2021 13:31 (four weeks ago) link

The future of mayo is aerosol cans.

"The Pus/Worm" by The Smiths (hardcore dilettante), Monday, 12 April 2021 13:32 (four weeks ago) link

Pre-mayonnaised bread slices

"The Pus/Worm" by The Smiths (hardcore dilettante), Monday, 12 April 2021 13:33 (four weeks ago) link

The other week in the supermarket I saw squeezy sauerkraut -and- squeezy sauerkraut combined with mustard!

In on the killfile (Boring, Maryland), Monday, 12 April 2021 13:56 (four weeks ago) link

I draw the line at squeezy Marmite.
Heinz mayo tastes weirdly of salad cream iirc? Yet is not actual Salad Cream.

kinder, Monday, 12 April 2021 15:10 (four weeks ago) link

my housemate is allergic to loads of things and reckons the Heinz variety is bad for him while cheap Lidl mayo is fine; he reckons there's more mustard int he Heinz stuff

Party With A Jagger Ban (dog latin), Monday, 12 April 2021 15:12 (four weeks ago) link

speaking of mayonnaise. the idea of a "famous pimento cheese sandwich" is terrible. but it also works as a symbol of what The Masters is. an exclusive 'tradition' surrounding an experience that is ultimately a shredded cheddar and mayo mixture on wonderbread.

microsloth fig stimulator (Sufjan Grafton), Monday, 12 April 2021 16:43 (four weeks ago) link

when you become president you get a free, endless supply of fried bologna

Zach_TBD (Karl Malone), Monday, 12 April 2021 16:45 (four weeks ago) link

Reaction videos for books. Just some person reading a book and going "woah" or "yuck" or whatever and occasionally stopping to explain how they really liked that paragraph they just read.

silverfish, Tuesday, 13 April 2021 21:58 (three weeks ago) link

Teens read "The Waste Land" for the first time

Jurassic parkour (Ye Mad Puffin), Tuesday, 13 April 2021 22:17 (three weeks ago) link

I was thinking about my reaction videos for books idea and was wondering if it would work better with audiobooks and then I'm thinking well that would basically just be audio commentaries for audio books and then it struck that the most terrible idea would probably be video commentaries for audio books which I guess is something like a music video except it's for an audio book

silverfish, Wednesday, 14 April 2021 13:21 (three weeks ago) link

Would you have, like, more than one teen reading the book at the same time? So the faster reader gets to a certain part a bit sooner than the other?

Party With A Jagger Ban (dog latin), Wednesday, 14 April 2021 13:27 (three weeks ago) link

silverfish i really like where this idea is going

Zach_TBD (Karl Malone), Wednesday, 14 April 2021 16:59 (three weeks ago) link

there could also be reaction books for books. and it's just a photocopy of the book with writing all over it. like when somebody underlines a sentence fragment and writes "wow!" in the margin.

microsloth fig stimulator (Sufjan Grafton), Wednesday, 14 April 2021 17:06 (three weeks ago) link

all proceeds to the reactor of course

microsloth fig stimulator (Sufjan Grafton), Wednesday, 14 April 2021 17:08 (three weeks ago) link

oh nice, like irl comments on books!

Zach_TBD (Karl Malone), Wednesday, 14 April 2021 17:10 (three weeks ago) link

very vintage, analog-feel

Zach_TBD (Karl Malone), Wednesday, 14 April 2021 17:11 (three weeks ago) link

comments on books me, please

microsloth fig stimulator (Sufjan Grafton), Wednesday, 14 April 2021 17:18 (three weeks ago) link

one in every ten vaccines should contain nutrients that make your farts smell like bakery fresh muffins

P-Zunit (Neanderthal), Wednesday, 14 April 2021 17:42 (three weeks ago) link

Pre-mayonnaised bread slices
― "The Pus/Worm" by The Smiths (hardcore dilettante)

this is a hell of a dn/post combo

G.A.G.S. (Gophers Against Getting Stuffed) (forksclovetofu), Thursday, 15 April 2021 06:05 (three weeks ago) link

welp, i gotta go to bed. there's nothing left to see today

Zach_TBD (Karl Malone), Thursday, 15 April 2021 06:14 (three weeks ago) link

A mash up of the weeknd’s star boy and the untitled goose game

a hoy hoy, Thursday, 15 April 2021 17:39 (three weeks ago) link

two weeks pass...

a band that insists they make humorous parodies of popular songs "like weird al", but all of the parodies are straight covers with lyrics clumsily adjusted with "the song" or "the singer", e.g. the first verse of their parody of 'Helpless' would go something like:

There is a song about a town in North Ontario
With dream, comfort, memory to spare
And in the singer's mind, he still needs a place to go
All his changes were there

the singer would be cracking himself up the whole time, acting as if the lyrics were just the goofiest shit ever. maybe they cover an instrumental song in a different key and laugh themselves to death at the end.

If you value Vox, we have an axe (Sufjan Grafton), Friday, 30 April 2021 18:20 (one week ago) link

as in:

There is a song in New Orleans
They call the Rising Sun
And it's been the ruin of many a singer boy
And God, I know I'm one

?

Long Tall Arsetee & the Shaker Intros (breastcrawl), Friday, 30 April 2021 18:26 (one week ago) link

Wait, like he's just singing along and then stares pointedly at the audience as the music drops out for half a second and drops 'THE SINGER' in a real stilted way and then returns to performing the song as straight as he can while doubling over with self-satisfied laughter? It's like you have a spy cam in my house or something, so eerie.

You Can't Have the Woogie Without a Little Boogie (Old Lunch), Friday, 30 April 2021 18:28 (one week ago) link

xpost Presumably 'And God...THE SINGER...knows...HE'S..one (uncontrollable guffaws)'

You Can't Have the Woogie Without a Little Boogie (Old Lunch), Friday, 30 April 2021 18:29 (one week ago) link

yeah and would be clumsier in rushing to add words so "There is a song about a house in New Orleans" where "thereisasongabouta" would be sung very quickly in the usual span of "there is a"

If you value Vox, we have an axe (Sufjan Grafton), Friday, 30 April 2021 18:30 (one week ago) link

and just laughing their asses off about their humorous parody of these popular songs

If you value Vox, we have an axe (Sufjan Grafton), Friday, 30 April 2021 18:32 (one week ago) link

God, that sounds unbearably obnoxious, I love it.

You Can't Have the Woogie Without a Little Boogie (Old Lunch), Friday, 30 April 2021 18:33 (one week ago) link

you can find a lot of this sorta thing on youtube i would imagine

Draymond is "Mr Dumpy" (forksclovetofu), Friday, 30 April 2021 19:00 (one week ago) link

lol, yeah was gonna say, my small handful of YT videos mostly exist to annoy any random googler who accidentally happens upon them. Seems like what the service is there for, pretty much.

You Can't Have the Woogie Without a Little Boogie (Old Lunch), Friday, 30 April 2021 19:05 (one week ago) link

A service that occasionally interrupts your spotify playlists with track idents and optional ai generated jingles and dj chat.

I was born anxious, here's how to do it. (ledge), Saturday, 8 May 2021 20:12 (two days ago) link

A brand of fish sticks called Cod Pieces

Triumph of the Willa Cather (Ye Mad Puffin), Saturday, 8 May 2021 22:49 (two days ago) link


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