here's a pats thread for everyone to talk about patritos shit because nobody else cares

jesus christ

yes i see patritos no i will not fix it

lets come up with comedy nicknames for laurence maroney

bustoney

mongloney

terribleplayeroney

no one cares about one of the best games of the season? ok.

tom brandy (a. what he was drinking in gallons after the game or b. a feminizing of his last name, take your pick)
kevin "not marshall" faulk
rodney harrisonned

http://media.nj.com/politi_impact/photo/bill-belichick-new-england-patriots-1116jpg-dfadd096ffc34ff7_large.jpg

kevin "not marshall" faulk

^^^ this is his legal name afaic

http://media.nj.com/politi_impact/photo/bill-belichick-new-england-patriots-1116jpg-dfadd096ffc34ff7_large.jpg
http://www.artphotographycourbetstudios.com/imagesnew/sad-fish08.jpg

<3 patritos

http://www.dansimmons.com/images_art/patrito_art_cover_sm.jpg

tobleroney?

The Onion is so cold:
http://www.theonion.com/content/news/patriots_lead_colts_at_halftime

http://profootballtalk.nbcsports.com/2009/12/09/moss-looks-to-be-at-his-new-england-crossroads/

Hap says:
December 9, 2009 4:33 PM
The Cheats are a mess ! They're coming apart at the seams. Bill Jellyprick has lost his edge. The team's imploding.

jesus you'd think they werent 7-5 and leading the division

otm there was a teaser for nfl gameday where fran whateverhisnameis was like, "is the patriots dynasty OVER?" i know these shows are just dumb talking points but really

http://deadspin.com/5424819/patriot-mascot-nabbed-in-prostitution-sting

"is the patriots dynasty OVER?"

LET'S HOPE SO.

adalius thomas benched for the game & possibly never playing another down for NE

yeah what is that about? is belichick mad at him?

i can't believe pat patriot is showing his face at this game. the NFL fines ochocinco for giving out christmas gifts in the end zone, but HE'S allowed to show up? fuck this league.

i think several guys are pat patriot so it's probably not the same dude? nfl is totally ridic about fining ochocinco, though, agreed.

i choose to believe that it was literally pat patriot who was arrested.

re: thomas, belichick had some issue with him earlier this season, which led to him being deactivated for a game (bmore i think). the media didn't find out what it was, though. then mid through last week four guys were sent home for the day, for being late to the 8am meeting (moss, thomas, guyton, burgess). speculation was, it was prob a cover for sending a message to some people belichick was having an issue with..

so thomas, next day, talks to the media in the locker room and is kind of a dick about it, saying look i called saying i was late, we're not in kindergarten here, i went home and put my feet up and watched some film, whatever.

yea that sound byte of thomas sayin 'we're not in kindergarten, etc' was $

pats message board has an excellent thread of classic pats in ms paint. i am stealing 2 for u

http://i45.tinypic.com/2nv87xk.jpg
http://i46.tinypic.com/ke7vir.jpg

r.i.p. mosi tatupu

on the same day david patten returned from the dead. the circle of life goes on.

am i wrong to think mankins is coming out of this looking like the asshole?

yeah if he thinks he is as good as jahri evans (quite possibly the best guard in the game) he is an asshole

The way the Patriots treat free agents, I don't blame him for trying to get every penny he can.

you mean the way they offer free agents the money the organization thinks they're worth rather than what the player thinks, or have they been torturing free agents in a dungeon somewhere and i just haven't heard about it?

The Patriots are unsentimental when it comes to deciding how much a player is worth. It is a smart way for them to do business, but I don't see how Mankins trying to get the best contract he can is any different. It's not his job to help the team cut costs by sacrificing money from his contract (assuming he could get more elsewhere, which I think he could). And honestly, he's a pretty good player. He might not be Evans but he's certainly one of the best at his position.

i hope u searched for 'patritos' when reviving this

yeah i guess it's just boring the way mankins is taking his case to the media--like, dude, you were bad last year and they still offered you 30-something million. ::shrug::

The Patriots' last offer, which has has been on the table for "a significant period of time", was a five-year deal worth approximately $7 million per season and would place the two-time Pro Bowler comfortably among the top five paid guards in the NFL, according to a league source.

http://gofugyourself.celebuzz.com/assets_c/2010/06/spl185209_004-thumb-420x674.jpg

with joe "jellybean" bryant! (not pictured)

lesbiansthatlooklikejustinbieber.com

no argument here

why does Tom Brady have Bieber hair

xp: ha

it looks like someone put a wig on his head from walgreen's novelty aisle or something, and he's forgotten it's on his head.

lol schef i was idly thinking of copying and pasting that pic myself; glad you're so on top of things <3

justin bieber/little lord bardleroy mix, imo

you...you don't need an o-line to win games, right? or a d-line? or lbs? or cbs? right? right?? cos i'm thinking, if you do need any of those things, maybe it is going to be a long ol' 16 games for los patritos :(

no doubt. mankins won't be playing at all, i'm guessing? and they just lost leigh bodden for the season.

but i don't know what to think about any team, except packers and saints will be good.

that was a fuckin big deal for ne imo. difference between 9 wins and a crappy division record and 10 wins and a decent division record.

deion branch 2 patritos?
http://sports.espn.go.com/boston/nfl/news/story?id=5661743

not a branch fan but he could def help for a 5th rounder or something

branch trade sounds like another thrown away low round pick, which is becoming a habit of late.

you don't need picks when you can just pick up DANNY FUCKING WOODHEAD as a free agent.

does it reeeeally matter at this point

it does in that i click on one, and rarely click on the other

This is the thread where I work out my feelings about the Tampa Bay Bucs

born to die / world is a pat

here's a fla thread for everyone to talk about floradi shit because no one else cares

Speaking of other Florida/Pats news, lets give a big NFL Week 2 Pat Patriot MVP to the Patriot legal staff for getting prostitution charges dropped against Bob Kraft.

Winners all around!

Seems if the video is ruled ineligible to be used in court, they did not have much of a case.

Too bad losers! Pats rule!

Mr. Kraft was only shooting video for the Patriots website.

Had to do it.

😂 @CameronNewton pic.twitter.com/w3G0EqLj4H

— New England Patriots (@Patriots) September 27, 2020

lol

came here just to post that, it makes me so happy

Pats rule!

https://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/en/4/4f/Pat_the_Bunny_image.jpg

11 years ago today, Tom Brady threw a record FIVE TDs in one quarter 🤯

(via @nflthrowback) pic.twitter.com/1chlpIDKTo

— SportsCenter (@SportsCenter) October 18, 2020

FG fest 2020

pats dont seem to have a lot of talent on offense

NE lookin pretty bad against SF

it doesnt seem like the pats will go 12-4 this year

Am I tripping or are they looking weirdly good this evening? Damien Harris is kicking serious ass.

yeah, i haven't seen a ton of them this year but they are looking pretty good. the offense is still a little bit scotch tape and bubblegum outside of harris but if anyone can make that work they can.

Don't think it will happen, but it would be hilarious for the Pats to win out and still win the division over Miami and Buffalo.

Schadenfreude is the best thing about NFL.

The Ravens still not being able to beat the Pats, when on paper the better club is still pretty hilarious.

It would be even funnier for the Pats end up in the playoffs at like 8-8 and somehow take out the Steelers (AGAIN).

Or better to upset the Steelers then beat the Colts (AGAIN).

Ha!

https://pbs.twimg.com/media/En2FvyRXYAA8ZnY?format=jpg&name=large

Part and parcel(ls) for this thread

happy retirement to julian edelman. one of the best.

https://www.si.com/nfl/2021/05/26/trump-bribe-offer-spygate-us-senator

heartbroken 💔 great man of God… lost for words - David Patten… 🙏 pic.twitter.com/DOMWJqjoBv

— Richard Seymour (@BigSey93) September 3, 2021

died in a motorcycle accident. absolute nails during the first couple brady years.

:(

oh no :(

fuck

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Mh933lut-hU

patten catches 2 tds, throws for one, and runs for one. stick around for his interview.

bill belichick talks about long snappers and the history of specialization for 10 minutes. pretty captivating stuff when he gets rolling explaining the evolution of punt blocking strategy.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3oH8dfwep0c

starts at about 12:35

oh thanks, that was a timestamped link before the embed

that's an amazing off-the-cuff response

there's now a little self-awareness with the media where they know if they ask him a broad question about football strategy he will just go and go (in contrast to asking him anything specific about the current state of the team), and i think bill is in on the bit at this point, but i can't argue with the output. he's an encyclopedia and really good at explaining this stuff.

good breakdown

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Z0eqNPiXgmk

lol i remember hearing after the fact that off the record the patriots coaches were very, very, very confident that they were going to win that game.

lmao got em

Everybody give Tom a hug

Thanks for beating us, Tommy

Bill broke wide open in that presser

belichick going to have to unleash mac fulltime sooner than later if this keeps up

https://www.patriots.com/news/bill-belichick-impressed-with-taylor-swift-s-toughness-after-gillette-stadium-ra

quarterback controversy?

belichick screaming "do your job" at the bass player

how did i not know this

I haven’t even mentioned how the [Patriots were] banned from home field Monday Night Football games from 1981 to 1995 because of a mass inebriation festival in which a man fell ill with a heart attack and some fans urinated on the EMTs while they were working on him and, after the game, some idiot had stolen a goal post and, on his way up Route 1, he hit some power lines and electrocuted himself.

jesus christ

if that's not great advertisement for 1980s football I don't know what is

stolen a goal post and, on his way up Route 1, he hit some power lines and electrocuted himself

is he still available? sounds like he might be an upgrade from the patritos' current placekicking situation

tbf if you'd asked me 'which fanbase did this?' i'd have said

1. eagles
2. jets
3. patritos

no bills?