Common Catholic Paryers

'i was mean to my sister' was always a great cop-out confession. i figured priests expected children to be mean to their siblings so i wasn't really giving too much away.

ah x-post exactly!

when really inside i was consumed with guilt for impure thoughts but obv wasn't gonna tell any priest that!

the only times i ever enjoyed mass was when the altar boys got the uncontrollable lols, if the priest got mad at them it was even better.

the one time i really enjoyed mass when i was an altar server and the priest gave me the wine to finish after communion.

but not in a creepy way.

a jerky organist playing in too high a key can also be a small, bleak source of entertainment.

we had an amazing organist at school, he used to be the organist at St Mary's Cathedral in Sydney.

after the mass ended he'd play like proper classical organ pieces, it was great.

also before a class would start we'd often have to recite the 'prayer to saint ignatius'

prayer of saint ignatius rather

the proper classical organ pieces would be a different kind of great from listening to elderly sopranos struggling through an erratic rendition of lord of the dance.

we had those, too (classical organ pieces). mostly because church gigs also included organ majors from my school. i think the dude at my childhood church would usually do some sort of postlude after mass, too. it was like, their chance to show flare.

Totally pater noster vs ave maria

We had a guy that would put a great deal of effort into Easter services, with little kids acting out the passion (to music). It was obviously one of the highlights of his year, he'd be frantically running around and acting out all the parts from the wings. Semi-creepy lols.

at aforementioned church gig i had to section lead a bunch of church ladies trying to sing the fauré requiem for good friday. megalol$.

oh god, catholic moment. here i am sitting in my underwear and stained t-shirt i've been wearing all week chugging cheap super-alcohol polish beer, stuffing salt and vinegar chips down my throat, and I suddenly think, "is this how god owuld want to see you?" and I'd be like " waoh too much"

Automatic thread bump. This poll is closing tomorrow.

Automatic thread bump. This poll's results are now in.

Our organist watched too many Vincent Price movies.

My dad would turn around in the pew and flash him dirty looks, hoping that the organist would see my dad in his little rear view mirror from up in the balcony.

Ave ave maria

my pary are with the father

http://in.answers.yahoo.com/question/index?qid=20071113022606AAdwedD

Grew up eating dinners at my catholic grandma's house (the one who is convinced I'm gay and 'ruined' by mom's Lutheranism), and for the longest time I just did not realize there were actually words in pre-meal grace instead of a v hastily recited string of syllables.

my mom just sent me a box of stuff and included a rosary given to me by my kindergarten teacher upon making my first confession or something. weird....

as it was in the beginning
is now
and ever shall be

I guess it's most appropriate for this thread to end with that ^^, BUT, inspired by people's random recollections upthread, here are two memories I have from attending church/mass when I was growing up

-this one parishioner would wear all green every week, including green socks, green shoes(!), etc.

-one week there was a young guest priest from some other part of the country saying the mass, and he began the homily with "now, what i'm going to talk about is something that we might tend to avoid talking about, but it's important to address..." i thought that he was maybe going to speak about pro-life blah blah blah or tithing or something. instead he launches into a looooong tirade concerning the evils of...masturbation! "THAT GUILT IS THERE FOR A REASON!"

Did people in this go to church in the 1950s or something? Ave Maria and pater noster were always referred to as hail mary and our father in my school /church.

bummed that I missed this poll though I would have voted hail mary anyway

Salve Regina needs more love though

Hail, Holy Queen, mother of mercy, our life, our sweetness and our hope. To thee do we cry, poor banished children of Eve. To thee do we send up our sighs, mourning and weeping in this valley of tears. Turn then, most gracious advocate, thine eyes of mercy toward us, and after this, our exile, show unto us the blessed fruit of thy womb, Jesus. O clement, O loving, O sweet Virgin Mary.

V. Pray for us, O holy mother of God:

R. That we may be made worthy of the promises of Christ.

Let us pray:
Almighty and everlasting God, by the cooperation of the Holy Spirit thou hast prepared the body and soul of Mary, glorious Virgin and Mother, to become the worthy habitation of Thy Son; Grant that by her gracious intercession, in whose commemoration we rejoice, we may be delivered from present evils and from everlasting death. Through the same Christ our Lord. Amen.

V. May divine assistance remain with us always.

R. Amen.

"To thee do we cry, poor banished children of Eve"? that is the good sweet stuff right there imo

to this day i still can't parse these lines satisfactorily:

"angel of god, my guardian dear, to whom god's love commits me here"

i am here, committed by god's love to the guardian angel? wait, what?

huh, that is a nice prayer, underrated

also, what is up with people who were raised catholic being able to sniff each other out in uncanny fashion? i've dated shedsfull of catholics, and sprinklings of jews, hindus, even the occasional entirely godless HEATHEN, but almost no protestants