people who poop first thing at work in the morning

i like to be ready for a blowjob at any moments notice

bidets r unsanitary

so is shitting

UPDATE:

some kind janitorial soul put some air freshener spray in the men's room!

we have the automatic ones at my job. with the hand held spays for backup

hand held spays?

sprays

cutty, do you sit on the seat or are you one of those people who squats over it and then flushes with his foot?

i do notice a lack of ass gaskets in most public restrooms on the east coast. those things are nice

I suspect he uses an elaborate system of gears and pulleys that allow him to hover over the bowl (xp)

guys, the toilet paper shield.

you line the seat with toilet paper, then sit on the toilet paper.

and then wrap your hand in toilet paper when you flush

and then leave the toilet paper on the seat so when i walk in later i get to scratch my head and say wtf?

i barely understand people being afraid of toilet seat buttcheek germs. but to be afraid of your own buttcheek germs?

cutty in Nude Spock shocker

and then wrap your hand in toilet paper when you flush

That takes all the fun out of kicking.

Woman love to get manicures and pedicures, I call this the "assicure" It has a meaningful name Ass I Cure, it's self explanitory..yes, it is up to you to cure that hideous ass smell and here is how you do it in the shower. Pamper yourself, get the water luke warm and try to get the shower nozzle to propel the water quickly. Begin by turning in the opposite direction of the shower, about 180 degrees to where the nozzle in shooting directly down your ass crack. Position yourself at a 90 degree angle, butt up nice and high, reach around and spread your butt cheeks and let the water do its magic. The object is to really clean out the crevices of your brown eye, wedged up about a 1/4 inch of the butthole is some fecal matter that masks itself like a bat in a cave. This will allow the water to loosen it up for the wash cloth lathering. The next step is to lather your wash cloth with some bodywash or soap bar. Reach around and scrub it good, go ahead and wrap the towel around a finger of choice (i use my middle finger) and put that finger up your asshole and move it around in a circular motion. Go ahead and scrub nice and good up the butt crack to make sure you get all the grease. After you are done, rinse well then repeat step 1.

http://www.craigslist.org/about/best/sfo/35584837.html

i barely understand people being afraid of toilet seat buttcheek germs. but to be afraid of your own buttcheek germs?

it's not the germs, it's the cum.

Where do you work again, ken?

why, tempted to join?

Any vacancies?

there are certainly cavities

bidets r unsanitary

this has the ring of an old wives tale to me. How is toilet paper sanitary? How are chapped sphincters and skid marks in any way preferable?

I've never actually used a bidet so maybe someone else can enlighten me here, but for the same reasons that you don't wipe back-to-front, I don't really want a stream of water carrying fecal matter/bacteria to wash across all my parts. Plus water alone doesn't bond to oil and grease and dirt since grease & oil are hydro-phobic, so unless there's some soap being used here, you might as well just wipe.

It's good for after peeing too. And just keeping your parts fresh in general.

most bidets have a soap dispenser

(i almost typed soup)

the soap is usually on a little shelf just next to the bidet

i don't normally use a bidet for the area under discussion, though

you use it for the face?

shoulders

THE ASS

jesus, people

now i'm totally confused. You do use it for your ass, or you don't?

Where's Dan when we need him.

i think he was just letting us know he doesn't have a vagina to clean

I'll play a couple games of Tetris while I'm waiting for things to, er, work themselves out

YES. Though I feel somewhat shamed when others come in and can hear the clicking of my cellphone buttons.

I work in a large public building with at least 10 bathrooms in it, so I can shit relatively anonymously when I need to. I do go at home before work, but sometimes you gotta go twice after the coffee's had a chance to settle.

Still thinking about soup dispensers over here. Must be lunchtime.

just don't put it in your vagina

broccoli cheese infections are the worst, totally.

omg I just totally grossed myself out. That's not easy to do.

The toilet at work is better than my home one. At work, I've got a bar installed on the wall to hold on to. The seat is longer where nothing is in danger of touching the rim. I only have to flush it once for everything to go away.

There's even a secret bathroom here that I found, one used by the wine bar that shares our building. Before 4 p.m., that place is deserted! Most days, I'm like Tenzing Norgay in there.

HOW many facets of public toilet use can this board throughly discuss? Why have people attempted to answer this question (indericetly)?

lol @ deej gettin real serious

nabisco OTM.

This thread reads like excerpts from one of the Enderby novels.

That's not praise.

I like the idea of taking a little 15-minute vacation on the bidet with the sports section.

i'm curious as to why you need a bar to hold on to when you take a shit

I think even Tuomas knows that stall w/ bar = for wheelchair-bound folks.

if pleasant plains is wheelchair bound (maybe i'm ignorant) shouldn't he have one of those bars at home?

I'm not wheelchair-bound, but it's nice to have the leverage.

u old

u wait

where's did this thing about oil and grease?

come about?