ILM : The Top 100 Metal/Heavy Rock Tracks Of All Time - Presented By Our Host, Henry, ILM's Favourite Heavy Metal Dog! THE END IS NIGH! (FIN)

I want to see who guesses closest to the correct order. They will get a special mention from Henry!! (who will be given steak beforehand so he's in a good mood)

Is it time yet? Is it time yet?

Good morning.

AC/DC – Back in Black: Another ‘classic’ hitting this chart. I do think the main riff is great, but the song as a whole seems kind of half-hearted. I’d prefer it as an instrumental.

Black Sabbath – Into the Void: More Sabbath. There’s gonna be so much Sabbath on this poll. Didn’t vote for this one, but it’s still pretty great. Uh, I’m not really sure what I’m going to have to say about all the Sabbath that’s coming up aside from ‘yup, this good’.

King Crimson – 21st Century Schizoid Man: I voted for this. There’s a lot of King Crimson that I don’t like out there, but this track cannot be denied. I do feel slightly shamed by the guy who put the youtube together, though – his commentary is much more informative than mine. Should I change to this style? “The song’s lyrics consist of a short poem with one or more metaphors in every line. Musically, the song is notable for its heavily distorted vocals sung by Greg Lake... Most of the song is in either 4/4 or 6/8 time, save for the percussive section in ‘Mirrors’ which alternates between 1/4, 2/4, and 5/4...” This is interesting stuff! I think he’s gone slightly insane by the end, mind you.

Manilla Road – Flaming Metal System: This opens with a full minute of aimless guitar noodling. Argh. The vocals really *are* pretty corny, but that just makes it sort of goofily endearing.

AC/DC – Highway to Hell: Again, a pretty good riff, but man, the vocals/lyrics do just make me think “what a bunch of horrible cocks”. I just don’t ever want to be in a room with people who are ‘rocking out’ to this band. Because that room would probably be Hooters.

Black Sabbath – Iron Man: I think this is the first of the Sabbath tracks that I voted for. NUH-NUH NUH-NUH-NUH BAOWAO BAOWAO BUH BUH BUH.

Metallica – Welcome Home: Oh no, we have a ‘slow, introspective’ intro, is this gonna be a ballad? Sort of seems like it, with the attempt to keep their metal cred by upping the chorus guitars. Oh, okay, and then you get to go into the slightly more rocking bit at the end. Still not convinced by this.

Funkadelic – Free Your Mind and Your Ass Will Follow: Voted for this one, too. This is an absolutely storming track. Did have quandaries about including it, but it’s much harder and rockier than some of the stuff that’s been on this poll, so I don’t feel too bad about it.

Turbonegro – Get It On: I had a brief flirtation with liking Turbonegro some years ago, and thought about voting for ‘I Got Erection’, but then realised I couldn’t actually remember it enough and may not like it any more. This is pretty good, though. Possibly one of the most poppy rock songs that’s been on the poll?

Led Zeppelin – No Quarter: And more Led Zep. I suppose I shouldn’t complain, there’s been more Sabbath than Zep. I agree with Henry that this seems to be subliminally telling you to get some shut-eye. Actually, there’s one effect they’ve put on here that I really like, and could see being put to good use. Just not in this song. I mean, it’s completely inoffensive, but that’s not really what I’m looking for in this poll. Or in music in general.

Never liked "No Quarter" much

I actually like NQ a lot. Led Zep is alright for me when they are doing mystical, creepy shit. Not alright when they're doing butt-rock or "wo-wo-woman" blooz belters.

I like it too, but it always suffered on my casette from being so damn quiet and in between two tunes which are clear as day. The riff on the chorus is killer though. I also quite like JPJ's sequence to this in the film, it's so much nicer than Page's nonsense.

Always thought "The Rain Song" was miles better

Rain Song is dope.

I just don’t ever want to be in a room with people who are ‘rocking out’ to this band. Because that room would probably be Hooters.

Haha truer words never spoken, i fear.

All Zep tracks get their own wikipedia entry. From 'No Quarter''s:

One version of the song, recorded at the Kingdome in Seattle in 1977, lasted thirty-six minutes, where, after the piano solo, Jones led the group into an R&B based jam, as a prelude to the guitar solo proper

99% of the times I'm listening to AC/DC, it's in my car, by myself.

99% of the times I'm listening to AC/DC, it's when I'm watching Iron Man.

(with my kid)

wow, never woulda expected 3 songs from Badmotorfinger in the top 100. i wonder how many albums can claim that distinction by the time it's all over.

30.
Queens of the Stone Age - If Only (1998) (483 Points, 13 votes)
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ucry7ZxDD_g&NR=1

and here is the original version (its quite different)
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JGqHuRAlfdQ

glorious song.

I'm constantly amazed that people rate Josh Homme above meh. Some of the Desert Sessions stuff is pretty good, but QotSA...

Blue Oyster Cult – Don’t Fear the Reaper: Pretty sure I didn’t vote for this, but I definitely have a major soft spot for it. It sort of sits alongside ‘Bad Moon Rising’ as ubiquitous evocative TV/film soundtrack music, and has burnt into my affection circuits.

Sleep – Dragonaut: Alright, I actually like the beginning of this – heavy riff, some sort of effect that makes one of the instruments sound a bit like a Jew’s Harp (or am I just imagining this?!). Vocal phrasing is a little Sabbathy, I think. That sort of almost monotone but driving thing. Yeah, okay, I can get with this one. Never gonna be a favourite, but I can go along with where it’s coming from.

Rush – Tom Sawyer: Wow, this is amazing! Oh no, wait, this is the 8-bit version. Let’s try the real one. Okay, effects = awesome. Actual song = not so awesome. Ach, I mean, it’s not terrible, but I don’t think I’d like it at all if it didn’t have cool noises in it. Still, not very many songs on this list have had cool noises at all, so it gets immediate props just for that.

Black Sabbath – War Pigs: I’ve now forgotten which Sabbath songs I did or didn’t vote for. It’s more Sabbath! Of course it’s great! Actually, thinking about it, I must have voted for this one, surely? Otherwise I would have been foolish. Very foolish indeed.

Black Sabbath – Sabbath Bloody Sabbath: And again! Black Sabbath ROOLZ! Did I vote for this? Who knows?

Soundgarden – Jesus Christ Pose: Soundgarden doesn’t roolz. Two number ones? Really? I dunno, man, it just smacks of MTV-rock to me, nothing doing.

Monster Magnet – Negasonic Teenage Warhead: I’m going to try to forget how little I liked the other one and give this a chance. Hmmm. Musically, it’s definitely better, but it doesn’t really stand out as anything special. And while I totally believe that they love Hawkwind, I’m not sure having an effects pedal really counts as being ‘influenced’ by them. Where’s the craziness? Where’s the personality? It’s all so clean and sanitised.

QOTSA – Avon: Haha, if it wasn’t for the guitars being mixed relatively high, this would sound totally indie. It’s not bad, though. Actually, I think I kind of like this one. So there you go.

Ozzy Osbourne – Mr Crowley: Ahhh, what an amazing intro. Can I just keep that Moogy bass-line going throughout all the rest of the list? But nah, the rest of the song is cool, too. Not so mad about this as the non-solo stuff (I may have said this about the other Ozzy solo track that got in here, too?) but it’s still good. Well, maybe except for that guitar solo. Bring back the keyboards! [This is a lesson in how to get lynched on a metal thread, isn’t it?]

Iron Maiden – Running Free: Quite like the rhythm element of this, although it’s not doing anything particularly innovative. Maybe sort of retro rock’n’roll stomp in a metal stylee? Um. This sounds like it would be fun to play on Guitar Hero.

Black Sabbath – War Pigs: I’ve now forgotten which Sabbath songs I did or didn’t vote for. It’s more Sabbath! Of course it’s great! Actually, thinking about it, I must have voted for this one, surely? Otherwise I would have been foolish. Very foolish indeed.

Black Sabbath – Sabbath Bloody Sabbath: And again! Black Sabbath ROOLZ! Did I vote for this? Who knows?

No, you didn't.

QOTSA – Avon: Haha, if it wasn’t for the guitars being mixed relatively high, this would sound totally indie.

Very true! "If Only" sounds like Weezer.

I'm pretty sure I voted for War Pigs. My favorite aspects of the song are the later instrumental bits.

Wikipedia tells me that this part has a name!

The outro to "War Pigs" has its own name, "Luke's Wall" (named in homage to the band's two-man road crew, Geoff "Luke" Lucas and Spock Wall,) and features a more melodic tone than the rest of the song.

29.
Darkthrone - Transilvanian Hunger (1994) (485 Points, 14 votes)
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SBwu83RR6ZU

Chap,where are you? you wanted more faster stuff, you should be a happy chap!

You people love some dumb shit, you know that right?

not a black metal fan?

I won't dismiss an entire genre based on one terrible song by a band with a stupid name, but it's not looking good.

that's a great song.

28
Mayhem - Freezing Moon (1994) (491 Points, 14 votes)
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=58o17dnB6hk

and the orgiginal version with Dead on vocals
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=o6jOWlUmp-A&feature=related

and as a special treat
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gvWFEZSFDYA

Great, some more bullshit.

It's where it's at these days

I'm now reminded out loud why I pretty much abandoned metal in the '90s. It got extreme just for the sake of itself. zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

no, no, no. how is this better than war pigs.

It's not.

It's hipper

Yeah, like "psssst...you listen to Mayhem right? Those freako murderer cannibal dudes? No? Well I can't be seen talking to you anymore, fuck off."

I like the Mayhem track quite a bit but didn't vote for it. The Darkthrone I can appreciate for it's significance but is so not my thing.

TWO songs from the first QotSA album?! Wtf ilx rulez!!!

Happy Birthday to me!

*twiddles thumbs*

happy birthday Drugs A. Money!

Have some drugs and money on us

Here is my present to you!

27.
Queens of the Stone Age - Regular John (1998) (505 Points, 14 votes)
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gf6qnX4rmDU

One of my votes!

boffo idea! xps

Okay, are you fucking kidding me? Three QOTSA tracks from the same album w/in seven spaces? Settle on a favorite, people, and then vote THAT ONE up. You're crowding out shit I LIKE.

Oh great, more Weezer. Do we get the Foo Fighters too?

I'm gonna check out if this countdown doesn't get better quicklike.

LOL Fantastic!!!

thank you pfunkboy you've made it a day to remember!

Wouldn't be an ilm metal poll without Statler & Waldorf ^