people who poop first thing at work in the morning

Any vacancies?

there are certainly cavities

bidets r unsanitary

this has the ring of an old wives tale to me. How is toilet paper sanitary? How are chapped sphincters and skid marks in any way preferable?

I've never actually used a bidet so maybe someone else can enlighten me here, but for the same reasons that you don't wipe back-to-front, I don't really want a stream of water carrying fecal matter/bacteria to wash across all my parts. Plus water alone doesn't bond to oil and grease and dirt since grease & oil are hydro-phobic, so unless there's some soap being used here, you might as well just wipe.

It's good for after peeing too. And just keeping your parts fresh in general.

most bidets have a soap dispenser

(i almost typed soup)

the soap is usually on a little shelf just next to the bidet

i don't normally use a bidet for the area under discussion, though

you use it for the face?

shoulders

THE ASS

jesus, people

now i'm totally confused. You do use it for your ass, or you don't?

Where's Dan when we need him.

i think he was just letting us know he doesn't have a vagina to clean

I'll play a couple games of Tetris while I'm waiting for things to, er, work themselves out

YES. Though I feel somewhat shamed when others come in and can hear the clicking of my cellphone buttons.

I work in a large public building with at least 10 bathrooms in it, so I can shit relatively anonymously when I need to. I do go at home before work, but sometimes you gotta go twice after the coffee's had a chance to settle.

Still thinking about soup dispensers over here. Must be lunchtime.

just don't put it in your vagina

broccoli cheese infections are the worst, totally.

omg I just totally grossed myself out. That's not easy to do.

The toilet at work is better than my home one. At work, I've got a bar installed on the wall to hold on to. The seat is longer where nothing is in danger of touching the rim. I only have to flush it once for everything to go away.

There's even a secret bathroom here that I found, one used by the wine bar that shares our building. Before 4 p.m., that place is deserted! Most days, I'm like Tenzing Norgay in there.

HOW many facets of public toilet use can this board throughly discuss? Why have people attempted to answer this question (indericetly)?

lol @ deej gettin real serious

nabisco OTM.

This thread reads like excerpts from one of the Enderby novels.

That's not praise.

I like the idea of taking a little 15-minute vacation on the bidet with the sports section.

i'm curious as to why you need a bar to hold on to when you take a shit

I think even Tuomas knows that stall w/ bar = for wheelchair-bound folks.

if pleasant plains is wheelchair bound (maybe i'm ignorant) shouldn't he have one of those bars at home?

I'm not wheelchair-bound, but it's nice to have the leverage.

u old

u wait

where's did this thing about oil and grease?

come about?

cutty is such a lady

I thought of you twice today, Cutty.

Twice.

i hope every single one of your thinks of me when you take a shit at work during the hours of 9-10 AM

hahaha

can we add a mandatory courtesy flush clause to this bill?

What is it with you boys and yr obsession with pooping habits.

Pooping is important.

I spend a lot of time on the crapper and I'm always copping shit for it. LEAVE ME ALONE. Yes, I take in reading material, yes, I take off my shirt like George Costanza. I like to chill in a space where neither children nor women can ask me to do various jobs. I am not alone: men who crap for 15 mins, take a stand! WHO'S WITH ME?

Also, Americans, it's not poop, doo-doo, dootie or any other one of your weird prissy words. It's either shit or crap. There is no need to sugar coat a stool.

:(

Colonel Poo, I'm so sorry. It was so thoughtless of me. I retract everything.

:)

I spend a lot of time on the crapper and I'm always copping shit for it.

Well, one would hope that was the aim, yes?

Vulgar words for poop are so gauche.

This is turning into a shitfight.

the joys of working from home

sometimes ill take the laptop in for a particular complicated one

the pros work it out with a pencil

uuugh i'd so much rather have a public bathroom with a bunch of stalls than share a bathroom with a family member who occupies it for half an hour to an hour at a time multiple times a day. (he shaves, brushes his teeth, and showers after he goes to the bathroom sometimes, so you never know how long it is going to take.) i moved my fucking toothbrush today so i don't have to stand around waiting.

moving out in exactly 3 weeks though....

Now whenever any of us FAP w/ Cutty, all we'll be able to think of will be the gleaming cleanliness of his asshole, hidden under all that clothing. What a waste.