people who poop first thing at work in the morning

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It *is* conveniently timed to avoid pooping at work at all, tho...at least there is that.

A Alphabetical Leader (Abbbottt), Friday, 11 February 2011 00:17 (thirteen years ago) link

I have that problem too but it is usually the BM that wakes me up at 4 am to 5 am rather than me waking up and then it happening

werner herzog zwei (San Te), Friday, 11 February 2011 02:16 (thirteen years ago) link

honestly at work I manage to pick a pooping time that coincides with the damn janitor cleaning the bathroom. One of the stalls has a faulty lock on the door, and sometimes I get stuck in that one, and I'm so paranoid of him barging in that I give a warning "someone's in here" flush every time I hear his voice.

werner herzog zwei (San Te), Friday, 11 February 2011 02:17 (thirteen years ago) link

xps: That is a rare G.I. condition known as asssbuttt.

Damo Suzuki's Dead Parrot (kkvgz), Friday, 11 February 2011 12:04 (thirteen years ago) link

xpost "Not Including you?"

Mark G, Friday, 11 February 2011 12:06 (thirteen years ago) link

san te give him the someone is in here clearing of the throat.

OLD MAN YELLS AT SHOUT RAP (chrisv2010), Friday, 11 February 2011 14:01 (thirteen years ago) link

anyone have one of these coffee makers that you can prepare the night before & it will start making coffee at a set time? i don't drink coffee but my dad/brother use our coffee maker that way & it seems pretty dope

don't make me go plop the trunk (J0rdan S.), Friday, 11 February 2011 14:53 (thirteen years ago) link

My roommate does. It is really nifty when you work a M-F job as it makes waking up a more seamless process

furious styles p diddy kong (San Te), Friday, 11 February 2011 15:04 (thirteen years ago) link

anyone have one of these coffee makers that you can prepare the night before & it will start making coffee at a set time? i don't drink coffee but my dad/brother use our coffee maker that way & it seems pretty dope

It's pretty awesome – I have mine set to go while I'm in the shower. When I emerge, coffee's done.

Rich Lolwry (Alfred, Lord Sotosyn), Friday, 11 February 2011 15:04 (thirteen years ago) link

what does this have to do with shitting.

OLD MAN YELLS AT SHOUT RAP (chrisv2010), Friday, 11 February 2011 15:33 (thirteen years ago) link

If you don't know about the coffee/shitting connection you are a lucky man.

Pirates of the Caribbean V: Letters of Marque & Reprisal (Phil D.), Friday, 11 February 2011 15:36 (thirteen years ago) link

Scheduling completed coffee can force a pre-work pooping time.

That said, ideally you'd gulp a cup of coffee, walk around for a half hour, poop, shower, and then go to work.

Total nonsense, I can't wake up that early before going to work.

w/no hesitation (mh), Friday, 11 February 2011 15:36 (thirteen years ago) link

so that's what my upstairs neighbour spends >= half an hour walking round on the wooden floorboards right above my room at 7am every day, the fucker.

ledge, Friday, 11 February 2011 15:38 (thirteen years ago) link

oh i know all about coffee/shitting....clockwork baby. drink my cup on the toilet sometimes.

OLD MAN YELLS AT SHOUT RAP (chrisv2010), Friday, 11 February 2011 15:38 (thirteen years ago) link

gross dude

Aerosol, Friday, 11 February 2011 15:39 (thirteen years ago) link

and read the news paper.

OLD MAN YELLS AT SHOUT RAP (chrisv2010), Friday, 11 February 2011 15:41 (thirteen years ago) link

i dont drink it with my asshole.

OLD MAN YELLS AT SHOUT RAP (chrisv2010), Friday, 11 February 2011 15:41 (thirteen years ago) link

brew some assuccino

am0n, Friday, 11 February 2011 15:42 (thirteen years ago) link

If you don't know about the coffee/shitting connection you are a lucky man.

― Pirates of the Caribbean V: Letters of Marque & Reprisal (Phil D.), Friday, 11 February 2011 15:36 (6 minutes ago) Bookmark Suggest Ban Permalink

And now I have the Alan Price song in my head...

Mark G, Friday, 11 February 2011 15:42 (thirteen years ago) link

i am captain multitasking shit.

OLD MAN YELLS AT SHOUT RAP (chrisv2010), Friday, 11 February 2011 15:43 (thirteen years ago) link

plus im in there for a half an hour sometimes, need to get "shit" done.

OLD MAN YELLS AT SHOUT RAP (chrisv2010), Friday, 11 February 2011 15:43 (thirteen years ago) link

preparing the gasspacho

progressive cuts (Tracer Hand), Friday, 11 February 2011 15:44 (thirteen years ago) link

1/2 hour! xp

Aerosol, Friday, 11 February 2011 15:44 (thirteen years ago) link

that can't be good for you

Aerosol, Friday, 11 February 2011 15:44 (thirteen years ago) link

has anyone had a conversation on the phone while pinching a loaf?

OLD MAN YELLS AT SHOUT RAP (chrisv2010), Friday, 11 February 2011 15:44 (thirteen years ago) link

sometimes my legs fall asleep.

OLD MAN YELLS AT SHOUT RAP (chrisv2010), Friday, 11 February 2011 15:45 (thirteen years ago) link

xxpost: Loads of interesting ILX posts overnight?

StanM, Friday, 11 February 2011 15:45 (thirteen years ago) link

This thread has become a Colonic Confessional

furious styles p diddy kong (San Te), Friday, 11 February 2011 15:45 (thirteen years ago) link

i've been on a conference call while taking a dump.

OLD MAN YELLS AT SHOUT RAP (chrisv2010), Friday, 11 February 2011 15:45 (thirteen years ago) link

A video conference call

furious styles p diddy kong (San Te), Friday, 11 February 2011 15:47 (thirteen years ago) link

grunts and all

OLD MAN YELLS AT SHOUT RAP (chrisv2010), Friday, 11 February 2011 16:01 (thirteen years ago) link

my favorite mornings are the mornings when I have to go before I leave the house. After I get to work and have my coffee, I don't have to compete for the men's room (we have a single stall for like 50 people in my bldg).

rockapads, Friday, 11 February 2011 17:14 (thirteen years ago) link

I guess I will never find out why waking up at 5 a.m. means a 10-minute toilet session at 4 p.m.

A Alphabetical Leader (Abbbottt), Friday, 11 February 2011 17:18 (thirteen years ago) link

its your shitcadia rhythm

OLD MAN YELLS AT SHOUT RAP (chrisv2010), Friday, 11 February 2011 17:20 (thirteen years ago) link

I know I'm going to regret asking this but - does this imply that all of you go every day?

ENBB, Friday, 11 February 2011 17:38 (thirteen years ago) link

to work?

don't make me go plop the trunk (J0rdan S.), Friday, 11 February 2011 17:39 (thirteen years ago) link

pretty much; when I eat poorly sometimes it's way more/less often.

she started dancing to that (Finefinemusic), Friday, 11 February 2011 17:39 (thirteen years ago) link

like clock work e. once a day every morning, my wife on the other hand sometimes goes a week. Dont get it.

OLD MAN YELLS AT SHOUT RAP (chrisv2010), Friday, 11 February 2011 17:40 (thirteen years ago) link

hmmmm

Yeah, I'm more errr similar to your wife in this respect. I don't get it. I'm a vegetarian and eat tons of freaking fiber. I probably need some of that Activia stuff or something.

ENBB, Friday, 11 February 2011 17:42 (thirteen years ago) link

btw - x-post - Hi Lex!! :)

ENBB, Friday, 11 February 2011 17:43 (thirteen years ago) link

she takes miralax and it doesn't work. she also drink what i call "shit tea".

OLD MAN YELLS AT SHOUT RAP (chrisv2010), Friday, 11 February 2011 17:45 (thirteen years ago) link

activa had to change their slogan, because you guessed it...it was false.

OLD MAN YELLS AT SHOUT RAP (chrisv2010), Friday, 11 February 2011 17:46 (thirteen years ago) link

she takes miralax and it doesn't work. she also drink what i call "shit tea".

― OLD MAN YELLS AT SHOUT RAP (chrisv2010), Friday, February 11, 2011 12:45 PM (35 seconds ago) Bookmark Suggest Ban Permalink

is this like that scene from 'austin powers'

don't make me go plop the trunk (J0rdan S.), Friday, 11 February 2011 17:47 (thirteen years ago) link

Oh yeah, I read about that a couple weeks ago.

ENBB, Friday, 11 February 2011 17:47 (thirteen years ago) link

hahaha hey babe! gotta love that I surfaced instead of lurk for THAT. i'm trying to train myself away from 11AM but have no idea how. it's, um.. shitty.

I do drink a lot of coffee so that might be why!

Everytime I think of the regularity of (anyone's) pooping habits I think of King of the Hill episode where Peggy and Hank go to the doctor and she tells dr how often Hank poops and when he last pooped and Hank is all "….what?"

she started dancing to that (Finefinemusic), Friday, 11 February 2011 17:48 (thirteen years ago) link

its made from tree bark and sawdust or something.

OLD MAN YELLS AT SHOUT RAP (chrisv2010), Friday, 11 February 2011 17:52 (thirteen years ago) link

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UaUogmewRyc

Les centimètres énigmatiques (snoball), Friday, 11 February 2011 17:57 (thirteen years ago) link

she's convinced it works, i dont buy that herbal hippie bullshit. You need to shit, the remedy is a six pack of bud heavies and two shots of sambuca.

OLD MAN YELLS AT SHOUT RAP (chrisv2010), Friday, 11 February 2011 18:09 (thirteen years ago) link

BLAMMO

OLD MAN YELLS AT SHOUT RAP (chrisv2010), Friday, 11 February 2011 18:09 (thirteen years ago) link


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