russell brand - C or D?

Comedian in 'cracks joke' shocker

This week a prominent Australian television bloke was threatened with video of him getting arseholed and collapsing on the pavement. In the UK the smear campaign would go on for months and his career would be in tatters/hyperboosted, but here he merely addressed the media with 'so what, who cares etc' and everyone forgot about it.

Our press wants to be like yours, but we don't have enough stuck-up reactionary twats for it to carry through.

Sorry about that first sentence btw.

Jonathan Ross returns 23rd January, world resumes spinning

Jonathan Ross returns 23rd January, world Lord Reith resumes spinning in his grave

Buggins' turn.

I'm sure Mr Shennan will make as great a success of Radio 2 as he did with Channel 4 Radio.

Brand now on Twitter, talking mainly about being lactated by his cat Morrissey.

http://twitter.com/rustyrockets

Richie: Er, oh, oh yes, I'm an eccentric millionaire, you know. Er,
hooooo-hoo-hoo! Huh, I, I'm so inbred that I'm a bit stupid. Ha,
heeroooo-hooo! Oh, we've been inbreeding since the Vikings you
know, there's no-one loopier than the Richards! Er, bottom-fish-
bananas, er, etcetera.

'Do you have Pamela Anderson?'
'A woman like Pamela Anderson...'
'No. Pamela Anserson.'

Royally bollocksed that up.

I'll say, it's supposed to be Kim Basinger. And I've never heard anyone say "a wazzo pair of jugs". Not even Russell Brand...

There were calls in Parliament today for the death penalty to be reinstated as the only just punishment for Jonathan Ross.

Ross, who has the audacity to be 48 – a clear two fingers to all people of all other ages – shocked and appalled listeners to his BBC radio show yesterday for the 83rd time this week.

He opened his depraved programme by saying – at a time when children could well have been listening – “Good morning.”

“I couldn’t believe what I was hearing,” says revolted listener Joe Bloggs, 107.

“Ross clearly has absolutely NO regard for people listening over the internet in other countries, for whom it was NOT morning.

“This is racism, pure and simple. He MUST be stopped!”

Ross’s sickening outburst also provoked outrage among people who were not having a good morning yesterday.

Furious Joanne Bloggs explains: “It’s all very well for him to make his demands, but I’d woken up in a bad mood.

“After I heard him say that, I felt so pressured to turn my morning around that I could no longer cope with life.

“As a direct result, I’ve lost my job and my kids will probably starve now – which basically makes Jonathan Ross a murderer. He must pay.”

During the offending introduction and indeed throughout the ENTIRE show Ross could also clearly be heard breathing, BBC insiders inform us.

Jim Bloggs, of The National Association Of Asthma Sufferers, last night blasted Ross for this cruel, heartless prank. “Will he never learn?

“It’s simply despicable of him to taunt people with a very serious disease in this vile way and I urge the Government to take action.

“He has upset many, many people. And it wasn’t even funny!”

Jenny Bloggs of the National Society For The Deaf also hit out at Ross.

“It’s utterly typical that he chooses to broadcast on the radio – a medium that is almost totally inaccessible to deaf people.

“He’s discriminating against absolutely everyone in the world with a disability of any kind – Jonathan Ross obviously hates the disabled.

“Our members are seriously offended that they were unable to hear the offending material.”

Jonathan Ross refused to comment last night.

The British Mute Trust were preparing a statement about how insulted they are by this as we went to press.

http://www.mirror.co.uk/celebs/columnists/polly/2009/01/29/jonathan-ross-is-to-blame-for-everything-ever-115875-21079066/

it wasn’t even funny

http://www.slashfilm.com/2009/02/26/the-arthur-remake-just-got-interesting-peter-baynham-to-put-words-in-russell-brands-mouth/

http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/entertainment/7981078.stm

Beeb fined £150,000.
Is that it over now?

He's witty, quick & funny, but I'm still not sure why so many women want to do him.

Because he played the Spanish waiter in Fawlty Towers?

Fascinating. No, really! I like that he's nervous. I like that he talks way too much but isn't boring.

I heard 1/2 of that Fresh Air last night and it was quite entertaining.

David Mitchell: fuck yeah

Sounds righteous. What is he talking about?

mitchell's phleghmy outrage usually bugs me but that guardian piece was fascinating, i loved it

it just goes to show, you can't be too careful!

Dude is currently on Jay Leno's show, just rattling his damn fool head off like he's on stims or sumfin.

He's not like this all the time, is he?

yup

raison d'etre

He did alright on Stern, for a 'limey fag'.

WTF? These two are an item now?

http://i38.tinypic.com/avodwo.jpg

Oh yes, for like DECADES (in celeb time, in REAL time it's like long enough to fuck). They look so hapy together!

when the fuck did he get engaged to katy perry????

Just now.

I'm not certain the world needs a married Russell Brand, but that's ok, because I doubt it will have one for very long anyway.

Then again, one of the most questionable "womanizers" I've known turned out to have one of the most stable marriages I've seen. When I asked him, right before he got married, how he was so sure that this was the girl for him for forever, he said, "Don't you think I'd know that by now?" A slightly unpleasant-to-contemplate but nonetheless fair point.

He was looking very Hollywood on the Big Fat Quiz Of The Year the other day; barnet tamed, buff, a little tanned. Most odd.

big sweat patches

Yes, definitely big sweat patches.

hollywood sweat patches

As big as Hollywood, aye.

"I'm not certain the world needs a married Russell Brand, but that's ok, because I doubt it will have one for very long anyway."

agreed.

Get him to the Greek was entirely enjoyable, btw.

jonah hill looks like he's gonna go belushi/farley pretty soon

Jesus fuck! Are Katy Perry's eyes ALWAYS like that?

I thought this thread would be about this Russell brand:

http://www.gameday-athletic.com/images/Russell%20Logo.jpg

jonah hill looks like he's gonna go belushi/farley pretty soon

― Worth waiting for the fannypunch at 4.02 (stevie), Sunday, June 6, 2010 11:44 AM (6 hours ago) Bookmark

does he have a documented drug issue or is he just fat?

he took katy away from me u_u

ugliest pair of lead actors ever to grace a Hollywood film?

hahaha otm

sounds about right

Abbott & Costello are Pitt & Clooney next to them

http://natsukashi.files.wordpress.com/2010/02/turner_and_hooch.jpg