Please explain the lyrics of "$1000 Wedding".

Actually what this song makes me think of literature-wise more than anything is Ford's The Good Soldier - the unreliable narrator, the layers of deception, the odd moments of humor, the declarations of great sadness, etc.

JON WHITE IS CORRECT: THE BRIDE DIES ON HER WEDDING DAY. (I'll cite my source at the bottom of this note.) I think it's probably a drug overdose or a suicide. The groom doesn't know what happened & shows up. The bride's family isn't at the wedding because they are dealing with the tragedy at home. The word gradually reaches the people in the crowd -- but not the groom. When the groom sees everybody looking so grim, he makes a joke about it looking like a funeral. Finally, his buddies (who clearly know a lot more about his fiancee's past than he does) tell him what happened. He goes out drinking with them, & as they all get soused, the buddies tell the groom a lot of bad stuff about his intended that he never knew. He can still see the lies on their faces from all the times they could have told him about this stuff but they chose to cover for her instead. The last verse is not a non sequiter: Meanwhile, back at the wedding, it has morphed into an ad hoc funeral. (Hey, they paid their $1,000, right?) It's been a bad, bad day.
My source: I think there are now several official recordings of $1,000 Wedding out. ONLY THE ONE on the Gram Parsons studio album that most of you know doesn't make it clear what's going on.
I recommend the album called: Gram Parsons Archives Vol. 1: The Flying Burrito Brothers Live At The Avalon Ballroom April 4th, 1969. The Burritos were opening for hometown heroes the Grateful Dead, & the recording is from Owsley Stanley's archives. Stanley designed the Dead's sound system (when he wasn't designing perfect LSD, as explained in Steely Dan's "Kid Charlemagne," which is about Owsley). It's a board tape, so you can't hear the audience. The vocals are mixed very loud, so you can the lyrics very clearly. Parsons sings:
A thousand dollar wedding was supposed to be held the other day.
And with all the invitations sent, the young bride passed away.
The groom saw people passing notes..."
There are other tiny differences in the lyrics. I think that by the time Parsons recorded the version on his solo album, he wanted to blur the story just a little bit -- possibly so that all of us would be discussing the song for seven years decades after he wrote it!
One thing that makes the song even sadder when you do understand it is that it foreshadows Parsons' own death (as does Long Black Limousine, which he also performed). Like the bride in the song, he died suddenly & too young. (Interestingly, Elvis Presley also recorded Long Black Limousine. If I were a country rock star & I identified with that song, I wouldn't dare record it! I'd check into Narcotics Anonymous instead!)

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I believe the song is autobiographical - that it relates back to the feelings he had as a 12 year old child when his father failed to show up in Winterhaven for Christmas. The adults decided not to tell him or his younger sister that his father had shot himself back in Waycross until after the holidays. He could tell something was wrong but no one would level with him. There was no funeral. It was a bad bad day. Later on in his life, after all the invitations had been sent, his mother failed to show for his boarding school (high school graduation). Again he could sense something was wrong and was ultimately told of her death in a Winterhaven hospital from alcoholism. Not until several years later did his stepfather confess to having provided the alcohol to Big Avis in the hospital that killed her. Lots of old lies still on their faces in this man's young life. Probably very difficult for him to reconcile his parents' tragic deaths to the religious upbringing he would have had in the Deep South at that time. Hard to accept the oft held belief that a father who commits suicide would not have been accepted into heaven. That, coupled with the singers own spiraling descent into alcoholism and drug abuse led to his irreverent views toward religion (I hope you know a lot more than you're believing in "Song for You" and the reverend "Swore the fiercest beasts could all be put to sleep the same silly way"). The beasts that took his mother, father, and soon the singer were not so easily dismissed. And, with all the saints singing, why can't there be one single horn with one sad note to play. There was supposed to be a funeral. It's been a bad bad day.

Rob is my new hero.

http://www.americansongwriter.com/2014/10/lyric-week-gram-parsons-return-grievous-angel/

this song is inexhaustible

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kkuf4VzBAUI

here he sings 'passed away' instead of 'went away'.

https://youtu.be/ZJ_zkGtOAQg?t=1m5s

I'm almost relieved --- no, definitely relieved --- that this textual evidence points to the bride having died unbeknownst to the groom.

I've been scared for years that the real meaning of the song was that the groom found her after "he went out drinking" and heard all those stories and killed her himself - making this song something rather fearful to approach, and I suppose it still is.

One piece of lyric that pointed in this direction was the part where it is suggested that it would have been better if the groom had had his drinked spiked and been "done in some old way." Because at least then the bride who "only knew she loved the world" would not then have been killed. Hmmmm. I think I'm still scared. Not like life doesn't provide us with lots of these kinds of awful stories anyway.

Maybe this song just sucks? I mean, it isn't intended to be inscrutable, I don't think. It's just a mess.

No need to worry your pretty head over that mess.

I think the 'meaning' of the song is easier to discern if part of the lyrics are moved (as below). As well, there are 2 different perspective during the song; the objective narrator, and the boyfriend who has been stood up.

The first 5 lines are an objective description [by the objective narrator] of what happened that day. The next 3 lines show the meaning of the day has changed [seen from the boyfriend's perspective] from a wedding to a funeral...She's gone (for whatever reason, be it that she died, left him, ran off with someone else etc.), and the day is now like a funeral for him.

It was a $1000 wedding supposed to be held the other day
And with all the invitations sent
The young bride went away
When the groom saw people passing notes
Not unusual, he might say
But where are the flowers for my baby
I'd even like to see her mean old mama
And why ain't there a funeral, if you're gonna act that way

The next section (moved forward a little) is just a description of what the reverend said [from the perspective of the objective narrator] after the bride didn't turn up. His words were probably an religious allegory re the death / failure to turn up of the bride, and don't make much sense, or seem silly to the objective narrator.

The Reverend Dr. William Grace
Was talking to the crowd
All about the sweet child's holy face and
The saints who sung out loud
And he swore the fiercest beasts
Could all be put to sleep the same silly way

The rest of the song – the other 2 bits joined together, and which seem to fit together - is about what happened after the bride failed to turn up [from the perspective of the objective narrator]...The boyfriend took some friends out drinking, and they obviously tied a big one on. He told his friends everything, but thought they weren't really telling him everything...(he was probably a bit paranoid / sensitive). He was obviously upset enough that the objective narrator thought he should be put out of his misery. The last 4 lines just reiterate that the day turned into a funeral / wake, whether literally or figuratively.

I hate to tell you how he acted when the news arrived
He took some friends out drinking and
It's lucky they survived
Well, he told them everything there was to tell there along the way
And he felt so bad when he saw the traces
Of old lies still on their faces
So why don't someone here just spike his drink
Why don't you do him in some old way
Supposed to be a funeral
It's been a bad, bad day
And where are the flowers for the girl
She only knew she loved the world
And why ain't there one lonely horn and one sad note to play
Supposed to be a funeral
It's been a bad, bad day
Supposed to be a funeral
It's been a bad, bad day

thanks for that

why wasn't her mean old mama at the wedding?

Hi...Re "Mean old mama". That would be the prospective mother-in-law. In common 'mythology', mother in laws are often depicted as being difficult / mean. If the (prospective) bride had turned up, the groom would have even been happy to see his (mean old) mother in law at the wedding. In this case, the 'mean old mama' / mother in law didn't turn up, because the wedding did not go ahead.

Re the possibility of the (prospective) bride having died / been killed. The song works because she didn't turn up for the wedding, whatever the reason for that might be. However, it is unlikely she is dead. The lyrics say...

"With all the invitations sent
The young bride went away"

'Went away' clearly indicates she left of her own accord.

Later lyrics state...

"Where are the flowers for the girl
She only knew she loved the world"

I think this should be taken figuratively, in that the wedding has effectively turned into a wake (emotionally) for the (stood up?) groom.

Listening to Dirty Mind today it occurs to me that "Head" gives a pretty reasonable explanation of what happened.

hahahaahahahahaaha

Supposed to be a funeral. It's been a bad, bad day.

"And he swore the fiercest beasts
Could all be put to sleep the same silly way"

I'm just a little drunk and am jamming this right now but just really i want to bump this thread becauseI i have always found this line so beautiful