"Fuck it, I'm off" vs stability: advice needed

Not that brilliantly actually Sarah. That's a good point.

I like Oxford, it seems more appropriately sized for me.

I changed horses mid-stream (so to speak) as well. I had gone to Uni at 17, and I am ashamed to admit that my choice of which one to go to was based solely on the fact that there was a man involved and I wanted to be at the same one as him. Stupid, stupid, stupid. The Mod Lang degree I had chosen to do was completely wrong for me, and I was desperately unhappy in my first year. I dropped out after Easter, worked for the rest of the year, and started again elsewhere at the start of the next academic year. I loved the new course - it made a phenomenal difference to be doing the right stuff (much as I love Baudelaire etc, I wanted a more technical and commercial language degree).

If you feel that your course is the wrong one, another two years is an extremely long time to be unsettled and unhappy about it. As others have said, you may not be able to transfer smoothly to another Uni now (though it doesn't do any harm to make a few tentative telephone calls to ask the question, does it? ... you may be pleasantly surprised), so perhaps you should bank on starting elsewhere next year. Life's too short to be miserable.

Graham, Media Technology @ Oxford Brookes does seem more broader than your current course (and better suited to your stated interests), with extensive electronics and computing content.

Depending on your personal preference you can specialise during the second and final year in two major areas. The first area covers the specialised electronics behind modern media systems, the second focuses more on the computer hardware and software aspects.

I hope everything works out for you.

Aargh, the woman I need to speak to at the student union is still off sick.

ALl sounds very possitive Graham. Did you speak to the department at Brookes or the Registry - who will do all the nitty gritty stuff for you and sort out actual regulations. Departments are sometimes a bit fuzzy on this stuff. More modular units and semester systems makes it easier to transfer mid year as well.

Good luck.

I'm not sure who I spoke to, I got transferred a few times. I think it was the head of the course I finally discussed things with. They're sending me a form, which might be at home right now.

Right, we were in studio today, and Lawrence (my tutor) said "Right Graham, you're on camera 3", and I said "I don't want to", mianly because camera operating is the most boring job in the world, and you have to stand up for ages under heavy lights, and I've done it quite a few times before. Apparently this was the rudest thing in the world to say, and he took me outside for a chat. I said that I found it a boring job, and that learning studio operations was not what I wanted to do and not what the course was meant to be based around anyway, and he basically told me to piss off if I was going to have an "attitude like that".

I'm just off to see the student union person. I don't really feel I can stay here much until january with that atmosphere between us.

Right, I've spoken to the woman in the Student Union, who was about as unenthusiastic as she could be. She basically said that nowhere would do mid-smester transfers, and I should consider myself lucky I was offered a January one. And she wasn't helpful when I asked how to find out who else in the department I should speak to. She wanted to see my course handbook (which I didn't have with me), because that's what's legally binding and the Prospectus isn't, so I've got to go back and show that to her on Tuesday.

I've been home to dig it out It has a list of modules and descriptions hidden at the back, and they do pretty accurately describe the course. It does have "Audio" and "Programming" and "Multimedia" dotted around the module titles, but it's not obvious how TV focussed it is unless you're looking for it. It also isn't obvious that half the modules are taught in a "you really don't need to know this" way.

Unenthusiastic often = realism. If you look at all the stuff we've written above Graham I would be pretty surpised if you could even move in January (though semesters are different to what I'm used to so....) There is no overnight fix as well, these things can drag a bit.

Try not to piss people off on your course too much as you may need to get a reference off of them too.

I haven't filled in the form for Oxford Brookes yet, though it took weeks to arrive because of mt stupid university. I'dnactually be quite happy to stay here as things are on the up now with my personal life. On the other hand my course is becoming beyond a joke. Like right now I should be doing a camera assignment. The thing is, they haven't taught us anything about camera technique, so what they've given us to do (give an example of a mid shot/wide shot/panning/tracking etc) is so rediculous easy that we can do it wihtout teaching. Does no one see a problem with this? This is like, an entire 2nd year module for a degree that's as much about camera operating as anything else. Of course I'm not on it as the rest of my group (assigned alphabetically) didn't turn up and I have no idea what they look like.

I finally sent my application form off today, and I didn't get a bad reference for all the stupid stuff I've done this term. Hurrah! Hurrah! Hurrah!

My lecturer says I need a plan B, and a plan C. Suggestions?

Other institutions as Plan B, travelling round the world on a moped and living like the beats for six months whilst writing your epic book should be plan C .

Mixing random chemicals in a uni lab during a thunderstorm in the hope of a lightning strike turning you into a superhero could be plan D. Or Z.

Currently plan D is getting on a plane and annoying Melissa. Plans B and C I don't like to think about, though I guess I really should.

So can the origin of the Flash plan be plan E then? Also, haha, what makes you think that you need to get on a plane to annoy Melissa?

I don't. But I think I need to annoy Melissa to get on a plane.

(Actually I'm getting a plane back home for Christmas, cz I are mentalist, and I don't see how I can crowbar annoying Melissa into that one)

I SENT YOU THE APPLICATION TWO WHOLE WEEKS BEFORE CHRISTMAS AND NOW YOUR TELLING ME THIS WEEK IS A BAD WEEK WHEN YOU'VE HAD A WHOLE FUCKING MONTH, DON'T TELL ME THAT, GRRRRRRRR

(ie No news yet)

GRRR

I tried agian this afternoon and just got voice mail. FUCK. Term starts a week on Monday.

I'm on the first train to Oxford tomorrow morning. Any other ideas what to do?

I'd especially like advice on how to act rationally through all this.

OH FUCK THE LOT OF YOU

WE ARE NOT HERE TO SORT OUT YOUR LIFE

It's a good idea to go to Oxford as it is easier to sort out course changes in person. Hopefully you can find somewhere to stay that doesn't cost the earth. If not beg from your parents etc. This is not shameful but realistic.

And be patient. And polite. If you pretend to be rational then you will act rational.

Thanks Isadora.

(I'm not expecting people to help me sort out my life, I'm expecting them to be friendly)

Yes, but not everyone expresses friendship in the same way, and demanding that people speak to you just for the sake of speaking to you isn't looking friendship as much as it is being extraordinarily clingy. There was a lot of silence to your requests for advice; I took this to mean no one had any advice beyond that which was already given. You took it to mean that no one gave a fuck about you and then took a tack which, regardless of the scenario, is much more likely to push people into the category of not giving a fuck.

So, I guess my best advice is don't blow up at the people at Oxford if they can't help you out, as that will disincline them from taking heroic measures to help you. You've got to find a constructive way to vent your frustration (unfortunately, I don't know what that constructive way is).

Bursting in to tears in reception?

Only if you're dealing with women.

(Seriously. This was how people worked financial aid when I Was in college, and people who had opposite sex aid officers always got more money if they cried.)

I really got up at 6am today. Really.

I went to the Admissions Office first. They phoned people and been phoning and basically told me as they hadn't been dealing with it they couldn't do anything, and gave me phone numbers of the people they'd been trying to ring. But no sympathy.

So I found the Engineering department and harassed the secretary, and she said there wasn't anything she could do as Julia was away, as was the head of the course. I asked if they had mobile numbers and she said yes but she couldn't phone them when they were away. After a lot of pointing out how screwed I was, she went and found some guy, who was the head of Mechanical Engineering. He said Julia had been very busy preparing a report for him and seemed a bit guilty. He took my details and said everything looked good, but he couldn't do anything until he spoke to the Field Chair, who was away until Monday. There's no rooms in halls available, so next week is going to be very interesting.

Oh fuck, I just phoned them and got the "If you want to start next week, there isn't much time..." vagueness. I did get to speak to the actual course tutor, who hasn't previously known anything about my application. She said she still needed to speak to this Julia person before I got an answer. I really really should have asked what she wanted to know from her, so I could work out what her answer would be.

Would it be worth my while going to Oxford again tomorrow? That would give me an extra day to sort things out. I guess I should have asked her that.

Is it too late to ring her back, Graham? No wands to wave, unfortunately, but Oxford is a nice place (if you can ever get used to the crowds of people with Cameras that you have to barge through on your way to lectures if they're in the centre of town - I never did :o) ) Hope this works out for you. I've got my fingers crossed (and as a consequence, damn you, am finding it very hard to type).

You knopw that wall of silence that they sadi went up after those girls were shot. I'm finding out exactly what they meant. God I wish I'd gone to Oxford today.

ouch!

I never realised you were going to try and change between semesters. I thought you were going to take a break till september and try something else. Good Luck.