VegemiteGrrl's Home for the Absent-Minded

humbling, sad moment for me this evening

after yet again catching the cord of my earbuds on the corner of a kitchen drawer and watching my iphone go clattering to the floor, and exclaiming loudly in woe, i complained to mr veg about this always happening to me. He commiserated and said I should try putting the cord under your sweater. So I took the phone and started trying to feed it through the neck of my sweater. And he looked at me sort of funny and I was like, what? "I can only feed it down down, or I have to feed the buds up through my sweater and that would be more annoy--" and he asked for the phone and I handed it to him and he unplugged the earbuds from the phone, and dropped it down the neck of my sweater and I swear, I exclaimed as though he had just made a quarter appear out of my ear. OMG I HADN'T EVEN THOUGHT OF THAT.

I've sunk to a new low. I think I need a new thread. VegemiteGrrl's home for the very stupid. LOL

i'm having trouble with the mechanics of that. he unplugged the earbuds, *then* dropped the phone down there? so what happened to the earbuds?

it is 2 am and we are in like week 39284729847239842 of the stupidest heatwave ever so i may be even dumber than usual

no dropped earbuds were in my ears, he unplugged the earbuds jack from my phone so that the cord was free of the phone, dropped the cord down, while ALSO holding onto the phone. which he then plugged in once the cord had been fed down.

slot a into slot b then c through f

ah, got it

Today: Finish lunch at work desk, take bottle of Sriracha to meeting instead of notebook.

hahahaha omg that is awesome!

winner!

That's literally the coolest thing anyone has ever done.

Lolol amazing!

- Decided last week to transfer rent money from Chase account to ING account.
- Been spending and spending from Chase, yet not getting a balance alert text message. I'm rich!
- Mistakenly transferred money *from* ING *to* Chase.
- Been spending rent money on cat toys and falafels.

And this is still amazing

Today: Finish lunch at work desk, take bottle of Sriracha to meeting instead of notebook.

― Chuck_Tatum, Friday, March 8, 2013 11:42 AM (2 weeks ago) Bookmark

LOLOLOLOL

I just pasted this into a calendar invitation for work:

Today: Finish lunch at work desk, take bottle of Sriracha to meeting instead of notebook.

As an aside, the whole story of Sriracha is kinda fascinating. "Huy Fong" was the name of the crowded Taiwanese freighter David Tran fled Vietnam in.

My job involves maintaining/monitoring some scripts which process files people upload and email them error reports, and when I test them after changes/upgrades I am really bad at remembering to tick the box which says "don't actually check the upload area and don't email anyone" for test runs

so once again today I ran the script and emailed some real live users with about 6 billion error messages and then had to send out "please ignore this email" messages and wonder if everyone else screws up this often or if it's just me

(geeky postscript: someone is probably going to say "you should really have separate live and testing environments" and I'll say "we do but I keep overwriting the config from the live version which is in subversion" and yes I should really make it so that I can't do that any more)

Dumped the remains of bag of what I thought were ice cubes in my iced tea; slurped with gusto. Not ice cubes; onions.

hahahaha oh no!

irl lols oh no

Onion tea soup, eh? That's strongoesque.

Worst part is that I like eating ice, and the onions looked like perfect chewing ice.

once in elementary school i was supposed to go out to recess but i couldn't find my snowboots (wisconsin in winter) and was looking frantically for them, eventually enlisting the teacher's help to scour my locker, the areas near my locker, the lost and found etc. recess was over by the time i realized that i was wearing my snowboots.

the most disastrous example of an onion/iced-tea mixup i've ever had is when i accidentally used trumpet valve oil as contact lens rewetting drops.

Terrible!

As a former trumpet player and vision-challenged person: lol.

oh my je55e you are killing me, lolololol

thank god I made this thread

story is even funnier if you imagine they were whole onions

reminds me of this classic routine:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RZ2ow5lo4VQ

lol to both things

took a lot of replaying to translate that video to English

in one of my college houses, apparently I was so notorious for leaving things out/around that my roommates just started putting them in my room. Like I'd find a bottle of barbecue sauce on my desk, or a loaf of bread on my window sill. Thing is, being absent minded, I would assume I had just absent-mindedly put it there.

Of course then there's the time I unstrapped the baby in her high chair and walked into the kitchen with her sitting there unstrapped. thank god H was sitting there to catch her/yell at me.

i've always felt that absent minded people are the best people.

Until they leave the bathtub running in the upstairs apartment and it overflows.

i put a still-hot pan on a wooden countertop in my apartment in copenhagen, leaving a very visible ring that, for some reason, the landlords never made me pay for. i like to think of it as the distinctive mark i made on that country.

absent minded people are the best people to put your ipod through the wash

i lost seven cellphones in high school

yeah i guess absent minded people do cause inconvenience to people.... but they don't mean anyone any harm.

it's the thought that counts when the dishtowel is on fire again

put a still-hot pan on a wooden countertop

just put one on a cutting board the other day

ahh, you're lucky it was just the cutting board! this countertop was seriously ruined; i don't even want to think about how much it would have cost to replace.

Ketchup in backpack; wallet in fridge.

Looking above I seem to have a lot of condiment-based mishaps.

Incidentally my friend Rebecca wrote an AMAZING blog post on the unintended consequences of absent-mindedness. This is haunting:

http://playgroundconfidential.com/2013/03/21/when-it-rains-it-pours/

"I forgot to use a condiment" is not an excuse

Making coffee this morning, I nearly poured milk into the kettle.

Not sure if this is absent-mindedness, but -- last night I broke wind while walking out of the office, and was so embarrassed I sat down immediately at my desk and pretended to do work for ten minutes. Nobody mentioned anything.

Leaving the office, I was so distracted I crossed the street without looking and got side-swiped by a motorcycle driving on the wrong side of the road. Just missed me by inches. So basically, yesterday I almost died because of a fart.

did the "putting electric kettle on the stove" thing yesterday.

In someone else's absence, I've unexpectedly inherited a work task which would be very easy and potentially disastrous to screw up by missing something out of a labyrinthine assortment of contradictory spreadsheets. Like, if I get this wrong some of our stock will become permanently unorderable and there'll be a complicated nightmare of trying to recall things which will already be out in the wild.

I know absentmindedness is not necessarily the same as disorganisation (I've got both btw) but I'm here thinking "I can't even remember not to leave my housekeys in the door or in the fridge, and someone expects me to get this right?"

Might be time for you to suggest to your boss that this highly susceptible to error procedure is revised.

I think the long-term goal is that I revise it myself, but I'm taking advantage of nobody actually telling me that outright to put it off for a while, since I don't feel like I understand the procedure well enough

(but nobody else does either, any more - the person who devised it has left, and the person who's been doing it since then is absent "indefinitely" but she didn't seem that comfortable with it and seems to have put some contradictory information in)

I have the exact opposite project - my boss is making me work an insanely over-complicated spreadsheet that will literally be of no use to anyone whatsoever -- except, of course, my boss, who will tick it off their to-do list, then move on to their next poorly-thought-through project