Chicago: Where have all the serial killers gone?

I watched a Mamet movie last night, actually, or at leastan early screenwriting credit of his -- The Verdict with Paul Newman. Powerhouse acting from everybody (James Mason, Charlotte Rampling), nice dialogue, pretty subtle as far as Mamet goes. And then the courtroom scenes are PREPOSTEROUS. He didn't even both to check if the things that happen in the courtroom would in any way be allowed in any courtroom ever. The whole third act just goes completely to shit. Grrr.

Also, it's my Birthday Eve.

Also, I need to drink alcohol.

I had enough alcohol and food over the weekend to last me all winter.

Nick said we're going to eat nothing but celery the rest of the week. I put a plug in for ants on a log to mix things up a bit.

I'm looking at the character and fitness questionnaire for the bar... Can any of YOU list every address, permanent and temporary, where you have lived for the past ten years or since age 18, whichever is longer? Because I sure as shit can't.

2x

I could name all the streets I've lived on, but I'd be guessing at a couple of the address numbers.

What if you forget one? What do your addresses have to do with anything? I know that shady people take the bar; do they just slip through? Lie?

I heart Fellini.

1. 422 L@ngf0rd Drive, B0lingbr00k, IL
(Sept. 1986-Sept. 1996, Jun. 1997-Sept. 1997, Jun. 1998-Sept. 1998, Aug. 2000-Sept. 2000)

2. S3v3rn Hall, Kalamaz00 Coll3ge*, Kalamaz00, MI
(Sept. 1996-Jun. 1997)

3. Criss3y Hall, Kalamaz00 Coll3ge, Kalamaz00, MI
(Sept. 1997-Jun. 1998, Jun. 1999-Jun. 2000)

4. C0unty C0llege, Lancast3r Univ3rsity, Lancaster, UK
(Sept. 1998-Mar. 1999)

5. DeWat3rs Hall, Kalamaz00 Coll3ge, Kalamaz00, MI
(Apr. 1999-Jun. 1999)

6. 715 Dav1s, Kalamaz00 Coll3ge, Kalamaz00, MI
(Jun. 2000-Aug. 2000)

7. 2335 W. B@rry, Chicago, IL
(Oct. 2000-Apr. 2001)

8. 1530 W. Edg3wat3r, Chicago, IL
(May 2001-Nov. 2005)

9. CURRENT RESIDENCE
(Nov. 2005-present)

*Mailing address: 1200 Acad3my St. (Although I don't remember my box number...)

I also have to put down my father's name and address and I don't know if that means my deadbeat dad with whom I have spoken with once in the last 15 years outside of an occasional email and who is somewhat of an embarassment to me if they check up on his background ("somewhat" being a little bit of an understatement but we can talk about that offline some day) or if I can put down my stepfather who is the man I consider my father and who has a sterling reputation in his community and beyond.

This whole thing is making me nuts because they will actually write you a letter demanding an explanation of they find an inconsistency. I shouldn't have a problem being admitted because, somehow, given my shady past and many near-misses with the law, I'm totally clean. But I feel like they'll look at my application and see my filthy dirtbag past and use that to frustrate my attempts to pursue an honest, clean-cut future.

I just checked - jobs only go back for ten years. THANK FUCKING GOD.

I'm thinking about having myself skip traced. Seriously.

Yeah, I can't find that on Google and don't want to search through ILX because then ILX will break again.

Also: Kr just flew to O-ho-ho and won't be back until Sunday. Wah.

!!!!

All it entailed was some friends grilling calimari and discovering that the squid's body was basically a tube once it was cleaned... A tube that (when cooked) was roughly the same diameter as the kielbasa I had brought. One thing led to another, and the squid got penetrated. Then it was passed around. Quite tasty with a green chile marinade!

One thing led to another, and the squid got penetrated.
One thing led to another, and the squid got penetrated.
One thing led to another, and the squid got penetrated.
One thing led to another, and the squid got penetrated.
One thing led to another, and the squid got penetrated.

today in court the docket included the following names

donald duk
steven king
donna reed
jodie foster

donna reed was the only one present.

I think it all sounds a little suspicious on the part of the NO cops, but what do I know. NOT MUCH THAT'S WHAT.

the cop (tyr0n3 m1lls) said he would have just given me a ticket, but it's illegal to go around without ID in the state of LA. and they said that i would have to produce ID before i could get out, even if I posted bond and blew the whole department.

i met a young man who works in the campus rec marketing dept. at a local university. he is about 3 inches shorter than me, a soccer player and cute as a button. he and i have been emailing. he was charged with dui and driving the wrong way down a 1-way street (which was not marked at his turn because the storm blew down the signs, but whatever).

http://static.flickr.com/89/235418554_cdb87e9f38.jpg

The squid sausage doesn't look as god as I had hoped.

OMG YOU ARE THE FIRST PERSON EVAR TO SAY THAT!!!`1

Yeah, it was kind of a spur of the moment thing. It tasted okay.

Brine your chickens.