why do i hate that artist thing that people keep posting on my facebook so much? why am i such a jerk?

"um... well, we quite liked that "I know what I like in your wardrobe" song, you drummed on that, didn't you?"

Ha. "Well, admittedly, 'Ignition' is hella catchy"

"'Goodbye My Love' is a hell of a record... oh, that wasn't you? Huh."

I don't want to start another thread about these but dear lord.

• Life Hacks ‏@omglifehacks 1h
Want to meet girls? Go outside when its raining with a huge umbrella and take your pick.

• Life Hacks ‏@omglifehacks 8h
Out of pillow cases? Use a t-shirt.

• Life Hacks ‏@omglifehacks 14h
Most cab drivers in Vegas are actually required to pay your entry fee into strip clubs if you ask them.

There's no way that last one can be true.

• Life Hacks ‏@omglifehacks 19h
If you have a gift card for a certain store, but don't want to buy anything at that store, buy a Visa gift card with the gift card.

The stores will not let you do this, guess you'll have to outhack another fox.

Or the first one, now that I look closer.

• Life Hacks ‏@omglifehacks 8h
Out of pillow cases? Use a t-shirt.

This just makes me angry. Out of pillowcases? DO LAUNDRY YOU FUCKING INGRATE. Using a t-shirt instead of a pillow case doesn't make you a lifehacker. It makes you a slob.

If you put as much energy into keeping your living situation clean as you do in trying to find ways to game the system, you would be 100x less gross and expend 50% less energy. #lifehack

i am actually wearing a pillowcase with arm holes cut into it today so that heads know i am a lifehaxor

Hey beats washing t-shirts!

I'm sorry, can I just

“What are you LOOKING at?” she asked, horrified.

“That’s an abortion,” I answered plainly.

Am I weird for thinking that the pro-life person dispassionately looking at pictures of dismembered babies is the terrifying one here?

It's her job to post that on Facebook.

Now I know where all the stileproject editors went.

http://fusionanomaly.net/johnnyrottenglaremic.jpg

"That's not a baby, it's an aBORtion!" I answered plainly.

“That’s a 23 week abortion. That happens quite frequently, actually.”
http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/7/7f/US_abortion_by_gestational_age_2004_histogram.svg

uh yeah, I was reading that and was all "23 weeks?! this story is total bullshit"

Anti-abortion people are not real concerned with things like facts and truth. Or women's health and well being.

Side note: As we were jockeying for position in the over-crowded shallow end of the pool, this old dude in my water aerobics class said to me, "They must have advertised this on Amazon.com!" and my immediate thought was "Pluggers don't know how Amazon or membership-based gyms work."

lol

I lost about five hours of my life to reading Pluggers and Archie comic criticisms. Thanks Phil D!

i hate that commerical because all it says to me it even if you take our shit and it doesnt kill you your depression is one step behind you, or hanging in a lawn chair, ALWAYS FOREVER

― "Max's Original Starship" Vol. 3 (sunny successor), Friday, August 16, 2013 1:59 PM (9 hours ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

I mean it is though

― i too went to college (silby), Saturday, August 17, 2013 1:23 AM (3 days ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

well sure but its not the greatest selling point

She’s not stupid. Really, honestly, she isn’t. She’s actually incredibly intelligent, educated. She has a degree.

“That’s a 23 week abortion. That happens quite frequently, actually.”

man if I had a nickel for every 23 week abortion i've had.

"Out of pillow cases?" she asked, horrified.
"Use a t-shirt," I answered plainly.

Some Catholic women have 23-day abortions every month!

oh my

toilet broken? piss in the sink! #lifehack

Oh man the tips on Hero of Switzerland are making me INSANE.

https://lh4.googleusercontent.com/-RCX3ONCcYPI/Ucw4v44kViI/AAAAAAAAEg8/wXDYmeLQGhU/s640/blogger-image--1701665180.jpg

Like the look of margarine lids but can't figure out how to work them into your design scheme?

https://lh4.googleusercontent.com/-MII_hvd853I/USeBvxSlQJI/AAAAAAAAEb4/xe2NvmnJXQU/s640/blogger-image-717191273.jpg

Some Catholic women have 23-day abortions every month!

― pplains, Tuesday, August 20, 2013 6:13 PM (26 minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

i believe the preferred nomenclature is 'the rhythm method'

every unfertilized egg - a life, that was never conceived.

we are a part of the rhythm method

http://www.bayareaflashmob.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/03/Janet-Jackson_l7.jpg

• Life Hacks ‏@omglifehacks 1h
Want to meet girls? Go outside when its raining with a huge umbrella and take your pick.

• Life Hacks ‏@omglifehacks 8h
Out of pillow cases? Use a t-shirt.

• Life Hacks ‏@omglifehacks 14h
Most cab drivers in Vegas are actually required to pay your entry fee into strip clubs if you ask them.

The line between real lifehacks and satirical lifehacks is getting mighty blurry.

"real lifehacks" lol

iirc that last one actually has some level of truth

Out of pillow cases? Consider two sets of bedding.

too depressed to get out of bed? bring your computer into bed with you! #lifehacks

Life Hacks ‏@omglifehacks 19 Aug
Buy a world map shower curtain. You’ll become a geography expert from all the time you spend in the bathroom!

LIES, ALL LIES

Does your home smell like garbaggio? No time to clean? Hold your nose. That's a nose hack.

xp All those world map shower curtains use the Mercator projection!! IA!!!

took me forever to realize that Antarctica is actually a frozen desert and not the land of creeping mildew

Life Hacks ‏@omglifehacks 11 Aug
Driving somewhere 30+ minutes away? Listen to a TED talk—it'll make the drive seem to go faster since it's less repetitive than music.

don't believe that nose hack that hoos mentioned, it is a bad idea, trust me

gd ted talks

hahaha lifehack people and TEDtalk people... a Venn diagram that's just one circle.

it'll make the drive seem to go faster since it's less repetitive than music

you sure about that? i'm not so sure about that.

OK I am really tired of people talking about that slowed-down version of Jolene...

The line between real lifehacks and satirical lifehacks is getting mighty blurry.

I swear, some of them I go "These people are fucking with me."

OK I am really tired of people talking about that slowed-down version of Jolene...

YES!